by V. F. Mason
I cleared my throat and she spun around, clutching her hand to her chest.
“You scared me, girl!”
“Sorry,” I mumbled, but she just waved her hand dismissively.
“No need to apologize. Are you hungry?”
“Well, kind of.” She nodded her head and gestured for me to sit down at a big round table, which could seat up to twelve people. I chose the nearest chair to her, sat down, and looked around.
The kitchen was almost as big as the living room, but it was in a slightly rounded shape. A big window looked out onto the ranch, but it was hard to see anything because of the snow. The curtains were white with yellow tulips, and there was a lot of kitchen stuff that I had no idea how to use. I wasn’t much into the whole domestic thing; Nicky was. Strangely enough, this place had a homey feel about it, and Marie was very efficient inside it.
She put a plate and cup in front of me and I blinked, my attention snapping back to her.
“Thank you.” My body was dying for some coffee. I inhaled the aroma and frowned. “I’m sorry, but I don’t drink tea. Could you show me where you have coffee so I could make some?” She was really nice, and I didn’t want to give her more work than was needed.
“No, the doctor said no coffee for you, so I made green tea.”
Oh, my God, no coffee? How was I supposed to live without it? Among us, only Ariel was into the whole green tea and vegetarian thing, which I never understood, but whatever.
I had no idea I would be forced to become one.
I decided to check what was on my plate and thank God, there was a small bowl of soup. It smelled wonderful and I couldn’t wait to try it.
“You need to eat something that will go easy on your stomach.” I nodded and took the spoon and tried out the soup; it was delicious. At least my taste and smell was still there.
“If you don’t mind, where is everyone?” One of the reasons I wanted to come downstairs was to see what this place was all about.
So far, I hadn’t seen anyone but her and that stupid nurse, who I wanted to punch in the face.
“They’re working, though they will be back soon. Dinner is in about an hour.”
“So, will I have to work as well?” I asked.
Marie was frowning when she turned around with one hand on her hip and focused her eyes on me.
“You have experience in ranching?”
“Well, no, but I just assumed since other patients like me—”
“There is no one like you here; only you.”
“But how is that possible?” What the hell? Was he even licensed to do shit like this? I thought they put me in some professional care; apparently not. “Nurses and doctors and all the equipment?”
“They are here on Nate’s request. He had an agreement with Jeremy.”
Shit, so it was probably some private kind of rehabilitation. I didn’t feel that great about it. Not to be rude or anything, but the idea of being the only freak out there didn’t exactly make me happy.
Just what the hell does he have planned for me?
Ryan
“Look, man, I may be pissed at her for doing what she did, but I don’t want her to suffer.” The harsh tone of Jeremy’s voice annoyed my ear.
“She won’t suffer more than she has to.”
“Yeah, right. I know you have some unresolved issues with her, but it’s been almost a month. Don’t you think we can visit and talk?”
It was the same argument all over again, and I was getting tired of it. I understood where they were coming from, but I also knew they were the last thing she needed right now. She had to be with new people and in a completely different environment. I glanced out the window; it was snowing and the view was beautiful and mesmerizing.
Winter was my favorite time of year. It was the only time as a child when I didn’t feel like shit for being a freak who stayed home when everyone else was playing outside with friends.
“No.”
“Fine. But I’m coming in a month to check on her whether you like it or not.” With those words, he hung up.
He wasn’t calling the shots here---I was. They hadn’t been good enough for my girl. I didn’t trust them to make her feel better now.
It was hard to listen to her cries and screams, which were begging for her release. She had no idea, but I’d sat outside her door and suffered right along with her. I’d wanted to be near her, even if I couldn’t touch her. I needed for it to be over as much as she did. I had this stupid and fucked-up idea that I was close enough to her, I could give her some strength to fight.
Those were the hopes of a desperate man.
A knock on the door snapped me back to the present and made me frown.
I was never interrupted when I was in my office; people knew better than that. It was one of the many reasons I loved this place as much as I did.
“Come in!” I shouted, and the door slowly opened. Rose entered the room and I groaned inwardly. Wearing tight jeans, a blouse, and full makeup with her hair loose, she smiled seductively. I bet a lot of men thought she was hot. She was nice to look at.
She did nothing for me.
I knew she was trouble the minute she’d arrived here, but she was a damned good nurse, who knew how to work with cases like ours. Most importantly, she knew how to keep her mouth shut. So far, I’d been able to overlook her smiles and invitations, but lately she’d become too persistent, and I’d started to wonder if she was as smart as she made out.
“Hey, Nathaniel.” Her voice was husky as she came closer to me. I hated that name---my first name---but I couldn’t take the risk of telling everyone my given name.
“What do you want, Rose?” I wasn’t one to act cruel toward women, but if she didn’t get the hint, I would have to make her.
“You sit here all day. I think you need to relax.” She leaned down and was about to put her hand on my chest, but I stopped her hand with mine. I saw desire fill her eyes.
Fuck.
Clearly, the woman got off on certain things. My grabbing her hand in refusal gave her the wrong impression.
I liked to have rough sex sometimes, but wasn’t some Dom who got off on bringing women pain for pleasure. There was nothing wrong with that; it just wasn’t for me.
“Look, Rose, I’m flattered, really, but not interested.” She frowned for a second, then she smiled and leaned closer, looking at my lips.
“Are you sure? I can make you feel so good, you wouldn’t know what hit you.” The smell of her perfume washed over me, making me sick.
I wasn’t some kind of saint, who resisted the allure of beautiful women, but here there was nothing to resist. When Bella was in the same house, so close to me in whatever capacity she was there, I didn’t need anyone else. All Rose’s attempts were useless.
Before I could say anything else, the office door opened and Bella walked inside. Her eyes widened for a second and she tried to hide her reaction, but not before I saw a flash of disgust, and maybe even anger.
Fucking perfect.
Although she still looked like shit and not like her usual self, her face was porcelain clean and she looked healthier than before. For me, the sight of her did things that Rose, with all her seductive attempts, couldn’t do.
Fuck! It was hard to control it when she was here, and I needed to push the other woman the fuck away before she thought my reaction was for her.
I knew how it looked, as though Rose and I were about to kiss.
“Bella,” I said, and she raised her eyebrows and folded her arms. Rose straightened, rage filling her eyes, which she tried to hide behind her sweet smile. She looked mighty pleased with herself.
“I’ll see you later, Nate.” With a dismissive look at Bella, she left the room and closed the door softly after herself.
“Well, Nate, that was certainly interesting,” she mused sarcastically, and sat down on the chair.
What was it with these women making themselves at home in my office?
“Glad you
were amused.”
“Yeah, I think Rose will provide hours of entertainment for me.”
“To what do I owe this visit?” I didn’t feel like explaining myself, and I would have done so, if the stupid topic continued.
“I want to know what the hell is going on.” She glared at me, and now her face was all business, the amusement had completely vanished from her eyes.
“Meaning?”
“There is no one else but me here, and after wandering around a bit, it seems like this is a full-on ranch. Yet you have doctors and nurses here.” Her voice became colder when she referred to Rose. “So I’m asking again. What. The. Hell?”
“It’s a special program just for you. We wouldn’t want you in any center. The media attention would have been too great, and with your upcoming tour, you don’t need that kind of attention. I’ve already told you that.”
“So no one knows I’m in rehab?” Her tone tinged with disbelief.
“Everyone knows you’re grieving, and you are somewhere licking your wounds. No one knows it was drugs.”
“So everyone pities me?” She didn’t like the sound of that. Her spine stiffened and she looked lost. I knew she hated it and completely understood why.
Pity was all we got when we were kids, and at some point you start to hate it.
Along with all those people around who directed it at you.
“Everyone tries to understand. It’s better than drugs.” She said nothing. “For what’s it worth, I’m sorry about what happened to Nick.” Her eyes looked guarded for a moment, and she shifted them to one of the statues I had around the room.
“Thanks.” It was a low whisper, and I decided not to push it anymore. She cleared her throat. “So, what’s next?”
“You’ll have sessions with a psychologist and time to yourself. The ranch is big. We have horses. You can wander around and do whatever you want here.” That information made her eyes light up a little; yeah, I knew my girl liked horses. Had dreamed of having one back in school, but obviously I couldn’t say it out loud. “Basically, you’re here to heal. You’ll need nutrition to get healthy, and no smoking, alcohol, or any dangerous stuff.”
“Great. So I’ll have all those people babysitting me.”
“No, just me.” That made her frown and shift uncomfortably. “I’m your sobriety coach.”
She blinked several times and looked adorable.
Adorable? What a fuck, man?
“Sobriety coach? What does that mean?”
“It means I’ll be there with you every step of the way, making sure you’re on the right track, and always helping you out.” She didn’t like this information---not one bit.
“Why you?” she asked. I knew this question was coming. She wasn’t the only one who was curious about it. The whole team and her gang were against it. They didn’t see how I, of all people, could help her. I didn’t have the certification, but I had studied the subject enough to know what I was doing. She needed someone who knew her well, and that person would be me. I couldn’t give her that answer though, so I gave her the one everyone else.
“As I said, I’m friends with Jeremy and I have experience with this. Let’s just say it’s a favor I’m paying him back for.” She liked that even less.
“So I’m a charity case?”
“Hardly. Don’t worry, I take good money for what I do.” That wasn’t the truth, but close.
I took the money from Jer because he wouldn’t have it any other way, but I wouldn’t use it for myself. I had enough. I gave it all to a foundation for education. There were always kids out there who could shine brighter if they were given help.
I used to be one of those kids.
“Good for you, I guess.” She quickly stood up. “I’ll go do. . . something.” With those words, she left the room, and I exhaled a breath I hadn’t known I’d been holding in.
It was hard to love a woman who didn’t love you, but I was a master at it.
She thought she was a charity case and didn’t like it.
Little did she know that I was the one who was glad she was here with me—not the circumstances, but for the moments I would be there for her.
Annabella
I decided to take a long walk and get familiar with the place.
The rest of the house was as beautiful as the living room. I reckoned there were around twelve bedrooms upstairs and four downstairs. He must have a really big family or a lot of friends; otherwise, what was the point of having such a big house? Strange thing was, there weren’t any more pictures of him or anyone else, except those on the wall I’d seen earlier. It was hard to guess or peek into his life, so to speak.
The weather was cold, but for some reason, I needed to go outside. It was the whole talk about horses; I couldn’t resist those. I’d had a few riding lessons back in school, but had to cure myself from my love because I couldn’t continue after the free programs ran out.
Extra activities were expensive, so I gave up on the idea.
I wandered around and noticed a massive stable. I entered it and was greeted with the smell of sweat, hens, and horses. There were around ten or twelve horses of different colors, and they all had signs on their fence with their name and age.
The majority of them were young, but there was one that really stood out for me.
It was a brown stallion named Hershey. He was eleven years old. My hand raised to pat him on the head when he opened his mouth and almost bit me. With a scream, I snatched my hand away and stepped back.
“He isn’t exactly the most friendly one here. Still struggles with the fact he needs to do as we say,” said the gruff, yet amused voice behind me. I turned back to see who it was.
Standing there was an older man, wearing jeans and a jacket. He studied me carefully. He had brown eyes and his hair was gray. He must have been in his fifties or sixties.
“I didn’t know.” I cleared my throat. “My name is Bella. I’m, well, I’m—”
“I know, a friend of Nate’s.”
He reached out his hand and nodded. “Dean.” I shook his hand and nodded back. “Like horses?”
“I used to, and wanted to touch this one, but, well, he isn’t friendly, as you said.” He chuckled and pointed at a black horse a few feet behind us.
“You’re better off with Star. She’s friendly and loves the attention.” Before I could say anything else, a young guy entered the stable, or rather, a teenager. The kid was skinny and it was hard to see anything of him, since he had on his hat, gloves, and jacket. He smiled and extended his hand.
“I’m Nolan.”
“Bella.”
“Nate said, if you wanted to ride a horse, I should help you. Do you want to now?” They both looked at me curiously, and although they were kind and considerate, all I wanted to do was run away from there.
I didn’t even consider touching Star; even the damned horses didn’t like me. I forced a smile and mumbled under my breath, “Sorry, I have to go,” then quickly left and went back inside the house.
I should stay clear from all the folks here until I’ve cleared my head because this is unacceptable. I had no idea why I’d just acted up back there. There was no reason to.
Frustrating as fuck, that’s what it was.
“Stupid girl! How many times have I told you to keep your clumsy hands away from my things, and especially the booze?” Dad kept on screaming while I prayed for the floor under me to open up and take me in. It was my thirteenth birthday, and I wanted to keep the whiskey away from him. I didn’t want him drunk and angry on my special day. Unfortunately, he came downstairs when I was trying to hide it, and because he started shouting, I panicked and it ended up shattered on the floor. The brown liquid made a big, wet puddle on the white kitchen floor. He was wearing his usually stained white shirt and black sweatpants, and his bulky figure and beefy hands were looming over me. We were alone in the house. Mom had to go to work because they wanted to buy more drinks for the weekend, which was two days away
, and since all their money went to it, they worked hard for it.
Nicky was at his football practice and I had no means to let him know something was wrong. The old man had never touched me, but today he saw it as me antagonizing him on purpose, and I knew there was no escape from what was coming next.
“I’m sorry.” I kept on repeating that over and over again but knew it wouldn’t make a damn bit of difference to him. There was nothing more important for him and Mom than the whiskey.
“It was a whiskey I worked one week for. Do you know how important that stuff is? I already invited a few friends over to celebrate your birthday today and now look at it! Stupid girl, you ruined everything.” He snapped the belt he’d brought with him and everything inside me froze. I knew from Nicky’s experience that it was painful, and Dad was never gentle about it. He used all his power to make it excruciating and to make you shed blood. “You need to learn how to behave and keep those clumsy hands of yours away from our things.” He raised his hand and I closed my eyes in horror as I put my hands over my head, because I didn’t know how else to protect myself from what was about to come. Then there was a deep pain that ran across my back and I couldn’t hold in the scream when the buckle made contact with my spine. Tears ran down my cheeks. I wasn’t as strong as Nick, who never gave him an emotion.
“Please,” I whispered, but knew it was useless as the next hit came again, this time to my side, and it was hard for me to breathe. I was probably having a panic attack as well.
Suddenly, the door crashed open and I opened my eyes to see Nicky in the doorway, holding his backpack and looking at the image before his eyes.
His face transformed into full-on rage as he threw his bag and stormed toward Dad. The old man just smirked and straightened his back. He was always in a good mood when he inflicted pain on others, especially now. He’d never touched me before; he probably enjoyed my suffering.
“You motherfucking piece of shit!” Nicky screamed and shoved at him, knocking him off balance.