Alex’s blood ran cold at those words. Whatever this woman’s relationship was to Amir, it was clear she had set her sights on him, and intended to keep him. Or at least, what she wanted Alex to believe was that there was something more intimate between them. But the man she had been coming to know these past weeks was not the kind of man to play with two women at once. Something told her this princess was not as in as she would like to be. Knowing she needed to end the conversation before she said something that would likely get her fired, she said,
“Yes, I have also found him to be so, Princess.” She plastered a fake smile on her face. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I must get back to the king.”
She turned to walk away, and the woman’s next words made her shiver with dread.
“I would be very careful how you respond to Amir’s attentions, if I were you. The prince is a charming man, but he does not take kindly to being deceived, nor does his father. You would do well to remember that, and keep your distance.”
Alex whipped around, her face registering her fury, but the princess merely turned away, gesturing for a servant and ignoring Alexandra as though she had not just threatened her. She felt hot and cold, and stood there for a moment longer to catch herself. She would have to tell Amir, before this dreadful woman told him whatever she thought she knew, and made things worse for her. She needed this job, even more than she needed a dalliance with a prince. She had to tell him the truth, and hope that he would forgive her. Walking back to the king’s suite, she began to fret about what she would do if she lost this job. She would have to cross that bridge if she ever came to it before the king passed away. In the meantime, she still had work to do, and needed to stay focused. She could not afford to let a jealous stranger rattle her composure.
The king was awake when she got back, and sitting in his wheelchair looking out at his garden. His lunch was untouched, and she knew he was weakening. He did not eat much, but he still seemed to enjoy what he did eat. That he was off his food now was just another sign to her that things were coming to a head. She tried to coax him to take even a small amount, but he adamantly refused, and she stopped trying before he became truculent. Instead, she sat with him quietly, and allowed his silence to soothe her jangled nerves.
“My son thinks I should not have a celebration of my birthday this year,” he said suddenly. His voice was shaky but clear.
“He fears it may be too taxing for you,” she said.
“And you agree with him?” He turned sharp eyes to her face for a moment, his gaze belying the frailty he fought against.
“I think it might over-extend your strength,” she temporized.
He sniffed, clearly recognizing what she was doing and disapproving of it. “I want to have one last joyful moment before I die,” he declared forcefully. “Is that too much to ask?”
Alex’s heart broke at the question. Here was a man who, in his lucid moments, knew he was drawing ever closer to death, and who was fighting to keep some scrap of his former self to the end. She understood that need. She would persuade Amir to let him have a quiet reception to celebrate his birthday. It would be her gift to the man who had everything else.
Thoughts of Amir brought Princess Amina’s words back to her, and she decided that the next time he came to see her, or summoned her to his office, she would come clean about Simon. She hoped she would see him before the princess did. She sighed and turned her attention back to the king, who was once again dozing in the chair. She touched him gently on the shoulder so as not to startle him when she spoke.
“Would you like to go back to bed, Your Majesty?” she asked. “You would be more comfortable.”
He looked up, gazed at her, vacant-eyed, and then closed his eyes again without answering. She fetched a thin blanket for his legs, and let him rest where he was.The rest of the day passed slowly, with the king’s appetite not improving, though she did manage to get him to take a little of the broth that had been sent up for his evening meal. After he was cleaned for the evening, she tucked him in and watched him fall asleep, as though he had not been dozing on and off all day. She missed Amir, with whom she wanted to discuss her charge’s condition, and whose arms she wanted to feel around her again. He would be back tomorrow night, and she both dreaded and welcomed it.
By the time he did arrive to see his father and visit her the next night, Alex was a bundle of nerves. Simone had been under the weather the night before, and she had kept her home from school, which meant that she was tending to two patients, both equally unable to do much for themselves. Each time the king woke, he asked for water, which she helped him to drink. By dinner time, she was able to get him to have the small bowl of broth sent up with his evening meal. She had given instructions that the broth be made with meat stock and vegetables, so he would receive their benefit without having to eat the food, which he was refusing, anyway. When Amir arrived, his father was already in bed, dozing as usual. She stepped out of the room so he could have some privacy, but after a few minutes, he found her where she was sitting.
“Good evening, Alexandra,” he said, smiling at her as he sat next to her. “How have you been?”
She swallowed. She was too nervous to return his smile, and she knew he noticed it, but there was nothing she could do about it.
“What’s wrong, habibti?” he wanted to know, studying her face intently.
“I need to talk to you,” she said, gathering her courage around her like a cloak. She pulled her hands away when he tried to hold them. “I have a confession to make.”
She watched his brow furrow deeper, but he said nothing, so she continued. “Simone’s father is dead, but…”
She never would have thought saying the words would be so hard. Never until she had met and fallen in love with Amir — oh God, she was in love with him! — had she ever had a problem telling anyone that she and Simon had not been married. Perhaps it was because so few people had wanted to know, so she had mostly been able to avoid the explanation. But this was the man she was growing to love…the first man she had ever loved, as it turned out, and he was also her employer. His being a Muslim also meant the information could be very significant to him. And she knew she had let herself down, and him, by leaving it out. She should have corrected the misunderstanding from the beginning.
“But…?” Amir’s voice was calm, almost expressionless. He did not try to hold her hands again, and she sniffed, willing the tears to subside.
“We were never married,” she said, and hung her head.
The silence stretched between them, and Alex died a little more inside as she felt the growing tension. When he spoke, she could hear the anger in his voice.
“Did you live with him in a common law relationship?” he asked coolly.
“No.” She could barely speak.
Another silence, and then he asked, “Did he rape you?”
No!” It had never occurred to her that anyone might even think that.
He exhaled impatiently. “Then please tell me how you came to be with child by him, Alexandra.”
She stood up, unable to bear being so close to him knowing he was angry with her. And what she was about to tell him would make him even angrier, she knew. He would see that she was not the woman he thought she was. Her heart broke, and a sob escaped her, but she turned away to hide it from him.
“Simon was my best friend,” she said, turning back to him when she managed to compose herself. “He was kind to me, he understood me, and he supported me when I felt like throwing in the towel all those college years. I was doing it to honor my dad, but I didn’t really know what I wanted to become in life, and I had no one but Simon to talk to.”
She closed her eyes briefly, trying to find the right words to explain. “I graduated with a very general bachelor’s degree and no sense of a direction I should take. He persuaded me to let him host a graduation party for me. He knew that that was what would have happened if my parents hadn’t been killed. I agreed, and it was a smashing suc
cess. We both got very drunk, and when he took me upstairs and whispered in my ear that he loved me…well, anyway, we had never been French kissing friends, but that night we began to make out, and…”
She couldn’t say it. Surely he got the picture? She inhaled deeply, and looked him in the eyes for the first time, but could not read his feelings. They were shuttered, and her heart sank to her toes.
“Afterwards, I fell asleep, I guess, but he left to drive home, and no one stopped him. He didn’t make it there. He crashed his car into a tree and died there. Six weeks later, I discovered I was pregnant.”
She walked away to the window then, looking out onto a dark garden, closing her eyes and wrapping her arms around herself. She knew exactly how bad it sounded, and what sort of woman she must sound like.
“Why didn’t you tell me before, Alexandra?”
Amir’s voice was right behind her and she jumped like a startled doe.
“At first, because I didn’t think it mattered. And then, after we…” she hesitated, then plunged on. “I didn’t want you to be disappointed in me. And I didn’t want to lose my job.”
He turned her around to face him, his hands hard on her arms. “And why did you tell me now?”
Alex hadn’t prepared an answer to that question. She had hoped he would not care about the why. But there was no way to hide her reason.
“Princess Amina came for a visit yesterday, and reminded me that you and your father do not like to be deceived. I don’t know what she knows, but she seemed to be issuing some kind of…warning. I didn’t want her to get to you with a twisted version.”
HIs eyes darkened when she said the princess’s name, but he said nothing until she stopped speaking. His next question surprised her…it was not what she had expected.
“Did you love him, Alexandra?” His voice now was harsh with repressed emotion.
She looked into his eyes again, glad that at last it was all out in the open, and she no longer had to hide her feelings.
“As my best friend, yes. As a lover, no. There was only that one time. And it was a drunken mistake.”
She looked away again, because he refused to let her go when she tried to move away from him. She couldn’t bear his silence, and his hands burned her where he held her. She felt the tears slide down her cheeks, and though she had tried to stem the tide, they poured down the more she tried to slow them. She reached up, trying to clear her cheeks of the evidence, and he caught her hand in his and pushed her chin up so he could see her face.
“Why the tears, Alexandra? Do you think they will sway me? Do you imagine that I will look more kindly on your deceit if you cry?”
His voice was harsh, and Alex felt as though each word was a physical blow. Heat flooded her body, racing through her veins and into her limbs, and she dragged herself away from him and rushed to the door of her own suite. His opinion of her was all too clear now, and she had no one to blame but herself. Holding back the sobs, she fumbled with the door handle, but strong hands pulled her away and into his warm, hard body.
“Stop running away from me!” he commanded her, dragging her face back up with his hands on her cheeks. “Now I will have what I have desired from the beginning.”
He took her mouth in a savage, angry kiss, taking her whether she wanted it or not, and though her mind told her to protest, to fight, to stop him, her body leaned into his, her stance widened to accommodate his hips, and her mouth eagerly took the punishing kisses he meted out. He pushed himself against her, and growled when she moaned into his mouth.
“Are you finally going to let me have what we both want, Alexandra?”
“I…” Alex didn’t know how to refuse him, but he was angry, and she didn’t want to make love to him for the first time in anger. “I don’t think we should, Amir,” she said, the tears crowding her throat and filling her eyes. “Not like this!”
“Would you rather we were drunk? Is that the only way you will give yourself to me?”
She recoiled as though he had slapped her. He let her go as suddenly as he had grabbed her and said,
“You should get some rest. Against my better judgment, I have decided that we can host a small celebration for my father’s birthday. He will need to be well rested and calm. And you will need to be by his side until it is over. Malik will look after Simone. Tomorrow, you and I will discuss what will be the easiest and most comfortable way to do this.”
Then he walked away, not looking back, leaving Alex standing there shaking with grief and hurt and anger…and shame. She took a shower when she got inside, as though it would wash away the stain of her deceit, but it only served to wake her up more. She slept badly, and once during the night she had to check on the king, who was very active in his sleep, as though he was having nightmares. By morning, she was a wreck, but she had a job to do, and she would do it if it killed her. She had her child to consider, and once this job ended, she would figure out a way to move forward.
The meeting with Amir was cool, and after they had decided what to do for the party, she was dismissed as though she were not the same woman he had brought to orgasm with his fingers in the desert a month earlier. She tamped down the hurt and went back to her charge, getting Simone ready for school and seeing her off without really thinking about it. When Malik passed her in the long hallway and looked quizzically at her, she didn’t notice, and when he asked if she was all right, she nodded numbly and went past him to the king’s suite. She had messed up, and any chance she might have had at something more with Amir was lost. She suddenly wished there was some way to get out of her job so she could go back to the States, away from the man who was breaking her heart.
Her wish came true in a way she would never have expected.
Chapter 13
The number of guests invited to the king’s birthday celebration was small, but Amir kept himself focused on his father, who seemed alert enough. Alexandra stood next to him, and he wondered how she did it. It was obvious to anyone who knew her that she was distraught. Her face was pale, her eyes vacant, her whole aspect subdued. He knew she was suffering because of the way he was treating her, but it hurt him to know that she would deceive him. Of course, the fact that he was hurting the woman he was growing to love more every day did not make him feel any better than she probably felt, and in the end, who was benefited? He knew he would forgive her. What she had done had been foolish, but she had paid for her mistake, and the beautiful child that she had been blessed with made the punishment bearable.
She was not, as he knew well, a woman who gave herself freely to any man, nor did she flaunt herself to tease and entrap men. She was a woman of honor, hardworking, sincere, and proud, and someone he needed to convince that no matter what she thought of herself, she was the one he wanted, needed, had to have in his life permanently, even if he had punished her for her deceit with his cold withdrawal. He refocused on the room. The guests had all paid their respects to the king, and they were now milling about, reconnecting with each other, eating and drinking. The only dancing would be done by the troupe he had hired, one whose work he knew his father had enjoyed in his younger days. They were about to begin, and the lights were dimmed, except for the staging area.
Malik came to stand next to him, and he knew, by the way his assistant held his body, that he had something on his mind.
“What is it, Malik?” he asked. “Is something wrong?”
Malik cleared his throat. “That is what I am trying to ascertain,” he said, and looked over at Alexandra. “Miss Downing will not tell me, but I know that something is amiss. She has lost
her color, and barely speaks to anyone, including her daughter. Would you, perhaps, know why she is so upset, my lord?”
Amir sighed. Malik never questioned him, or tried to interfere in his life outside of his duties as personal assistant. But he was his friend, and had been for more than half his life. And Amir knew that he valued Malik’s companionship as more than that of employer and employee. He was the big
brother Amir did not have, the confidante.
“Alexandra was forced to tell me a secret she had kept hidden from me, a secret she knew would displease me, and I reacted with anger.”
“Will you forgive her, or is it unpardonable?”
“Is anything unpardonable when you love someone, my friend?”
Malik turned to look at him, neither of them attending to the first dance which had begun. “I am not the one who needs to hear those words, my lord,” he finally said, and then he walked away.
Before he could focus on the dancing, Amina sidled up to him and touched his arm, letting her hand rest there. He had avoided her all evening, but she had managed to catch him unawares, and he ground his teeth in frustration. The last person he wanted to have to deal with at the moment was Amina. Removing himself from her touch, he asked, keeping his eyes on the dancers,
“What can I do for you, Princess?”
“Your father seems happy tonight,” she replied. “You are a kind and thoughtful son, my prince.”
She purred over the last words, and Amir cringed, but managed a strained smile. “I could not refuse his request.”
She hummed gently, and put a hand on his elbow. “I said as much to his caregiver. She agrees with me that you are a kind and generous employer.”
Amir saw red. Whatever Alex was to him was none of Amina’s business, and that she should have come to his house to try to interfere was inexcusable. He turned to berate her, but Malik caught his eye. He excused himself and went to where his assistant stood.
SHEIKH'S SURPRISE BABY: A Sheikh Romance Page 102