by J. S. Scott
“That’s it. Need me. Come for me,” Zach rumbled, his eyes holding hers as she shuddered and released a throaty moan.
Kat’s eyes were glued to his, her channel spasming around his cock as her orgasm continued to rock her body. Zach pulled his hand out from under her ass, using both hands to hold her head in place, keeping her immobile as he buried himself inside her again and again. He was opening himself to her, letting her see how she affected him as he released a masculine, tortured groan while his scorching release flooded her womb. At that moment, they were both lost in each other, their eyes locked, every part of them combined.
Zach rolled to her side, pulling her until she was half sprawled over him, her head on his chest. Kat couldn’t move, breathing heavily as her sated body went limp on top of Zach. His lovemaking had been so intense that she was drained…but in a good way.
“What happened to Kristoff?” Zach asked aloud.
Still trying to recover her breath, she answered him with her mind. He said he’d be okay. His reaction was less intense. I’m sure he’ll come by soon.
“We need to go back to the demon realm to try to rescue those women,” Zach answered fiercely.
“No.” Kat sat up and looked at Zach’s face as she spoke. “You are not going back. There’s nothing you can do. You know you don’t have any power there and you’ll suffer the consequences. Not even Kristoff can get them out. He said the time will come when they can be rescued.”
“I need to go,” he snapped at her.
“Fine. Good luck getting back into the demon realm because I’m not taking you. I’m not taking any Sentinels until they have a chance of actually rescuing those women. I won’t be responsible for people dying because you’re being pigheaded. It makes no sense, Zach.” Exasperated, she sat up and glared at him.
“I’ll find a way in. I need to go,” Zach said impatiently, his jaw tight and his face strained.
“Why are you being so damn stubborn?” Kat sniped at him, irritated. Talking to Zach right now was like talking to a brick wall. And she was so damn tired. She hadn’t slept for two days.
“Sleep,” Zach answered, his voice suddenly concerned. “We’ll talk in the morning.”
Kat turned her back to him and laid her head on the pillow, truly angry with him. “You mean you’ll order and you’ll expect me to do what you want. Well, I won’t. Going back into the demon realm is suicide for a Sentinel right now.”
Zach released a frustrated sigh as he moved closer to her and curled his arms around her waist protectively. “It’s who I am, Kat. My demon instinct is screaming at me.”
“You don’t always have to be ruled by your nature. I know you can do the right thing, even if it goes against your instincts. This is common sense.” Even though she was still angry, her body relaxed, her energy completely drained. She couldn’t take anymore.
Kat heard Zach mumble something under his breath, but she didn’t have the strength to listen to his thoughts or ask him to repeat what he said.
Within moments, she was asleep.
Chapter Fourteen
She’s gone.
Zach could feel the emptiness in every room of his sprawling mansion. It was as if the life had been sucked out of the residence without Kat’s presence.
He rubbed his chest as he felt the physical ache of her absence. He got up and poured himself another drink and sank onto the couch in which he’d reclined while Kat had brought him to ecstasy with her mouth.
Breathing in deep, he tried to catch her scent, some remnant of her presence. It was fading. She had just left this morning, and already the emptiness was clawing ruthlessly at his insides, leaving him bleeding and raw.
She had left behind every article of clothing he had gotten for her, all of the cosmetics…anything that he had purchased during her stay. It was as if she didn’t want anything he had to give her…including his heart. She had briskly told him that she wouldn’t touch a dime of the money that he had put in her account, so he might as well remove it.
Zach had been so destroyed by her actions that he had blocked their mental communication, leaving it open only enough to know she was safe. He didn’t want to hear her rejection, or how she was thinking about getting back to her old life as soon as possible. Her hustling out of the door to the waiting taxi she had called, without so much as a fond farewell, had annihilated him.
Every demon instinct he had told him to go after her, throw her over his shoulder and bring her back to him. But damn, humanity could be a real bitch. He wanted her to be with him by choice, and she had chosen to leave. Still, he was seriously considering going demon on her and dragging her back. Really, it was just a matter of time. The demon wanted his radiant back, and the man couldn’t survive without her. His pride be damned. He wouldn’t last another hour, although he wanted to think he could.
“I can’t decide whether you’re a complete moron or a masochist.” Kristoff’s deep, sarcastic voice jolted Zach out of his thoughts.
He scowled at his king as Kristoff poured himself a glass of Zach’s best Scotch and seated himself in a comfortable recliner across from Zach. “Is no place sacred to you?” Zach grumbled as Kristoff made himself comfortable.
“No. Not when one of my Sentinels is acting like an imbecile,” he remarked casually as he took a sip of the perfectly aged whiskey before adding, “Did you or did you not let your radiant leave when she was angry with you?”
Zach felt his anger rising as he said, “She didn’t want to be with me. Her ass was gone the moment we argued. She claimed she was in love with me, but she still left me.”
Kristoff raised a golden brow as he replied, “Even after you told her you loved her?” He shrugged. “Or maybe you don’t love her. You didn’t want her?”
“I want her. I love her,” Zach blurted out emphatically. He took a deep breath before adding, “And I didn’t tell her I love her.”
Kristoff shook his head at Zach. “She’s miserable. You’re miserable-”
“She’s miserable?” Zach hated that thought. “How do you know?”
“She’s under our protection. I checked in on her tonight before I came to knock some sense into your head.”
“How do you know she’s not happy? She hates it when people read her thoughts,” Zach demanded. Honestly, it was more the fact that he hated anyone reading Kat’s thoughts except him…but he wasn’t going to admit it. Not out loud anyway.
“I’m king. I didn’t need to probe her mind to know she was unhappy,” Kristoff stated smoothly and without arrogance, as if he were just stating a fact. “Besides, she was crying with her sister and she mumbles to herself when she's alone.”
Zach cracked a small grin. “I know.” Her mumbled conversations with herself were actually pretty adorable.
“She kept muttering something about being in love with a stupid demon who didn’t want her or respect her,” Kristoff continued. “When I heard the ‘stupid demon’ part, I was pretty sure that was you,” he finished in a wry tone.
Zach’s heart dropped into his stomach. His Kat was crying? Shit. He couldn’t bear the thought of her seeing even a moment of unhappiness in her life. “Do you think she really loves me?” he asked Kristoff sheepishly. She’d been pretty pissed at him when she left, not bothering to mention when or if she was coming back.
“Either that or she’s been making time with another demon…which I highly doubt,” Kristoff answered as he looked at Zach like his Sentinel was a simpleton.
“Did you know before you sent me on this mission that she was my radiant?” Zach wondered aloud.
“I knew she was a Sentinel’s radiant and she definitely wasn’t mine. I admit that I suspected as much.” Kristoff’s answer was careful and evasive.
Zach was doubtful about the “suspected” part. He was fairly certain that Kristoff had known, but was unwilling to admit it. There was plenty that his demon king didn’t share. “Why did you come to me and recruit me, Kristoff? I was young. I wasn’t your usu
al type of recruit.”
“Some things are fated, Zach,” he said abruptly, his expression aloof. His reasons were obviously something he didn’t want to discuss in detail. “We were both in the same place at the same time. You needed rescuing. Let’s leave it at that for now.”
Zach silently cursed his king’s mysterious answers. Kristoff liked to play the badass demon king sometimes, but Zach knew better. “I never really thanked you for that. I should have.” He would have been homeless in the street and probably dead soon after, had Kristoff not come to him. He’d been too bitter to thank Kristoff before, but now he was ready to say, “Thank you. For everything. You took me into your home and taught me everything I needed to know to be a Sentinel. You didn’t have to. You could have found someone older. Someone better,” Zach muttered, knowing that after two centuries, it really was time to thank his rescuer. What had happened to Sophie wasn’t Kristoff’s fault…yet he had blamed him.
“You were bitter. I understood,” Kristoff answered wisely. “You might try my patience sometimes, but the investment of my time was completely worth it. You’re a good Sentinel, Zach, and a loyal friend. You’ve served well. It’s time for you to be happy.”
“Kat doesn’t want me to go after the human captives in the demon realm or to say anything to anyone. I’m a Sentinel. My duty is to rescue those people,” Zach grumbled. “We argued and she finally left. She said I was being completely unreasonable and if I wanted to go on a suicidal mission, she didn’t want to watch me kill myself.”
Kristoff tossed back a mouthful of Scotch before asking, “And were you?”
Zach frowned as his eyes rose to Kristoff’s face with a questioning look. “Was I what?”
“Were you unreasonable? Did you listen to her? I don’t think Kat is the type of woman to just fly off the handle for no reason. And she’s right. We don’t have the power right now to be able to rescue those humans. You just don’t want to admit it,” Kristoff replied, leaning back in his chair and continuing to stare at Zach with a dry look. “Do you really want to alert your brothers so you can all go off on a suicide mission? It won’t help those women. There is no way to remove them. They’re under a bargain with an Evil. Their rescue will take planning and power.”
Zach swallowed hard, the reality of the situation finally beating him over the head with a sledgehammer. “So they’ll continue to suffer? We’ll never be able to get them out?” he asked in a husky voice.
“Not exactly. I think we will be able to help them, but not right now,” Kristoff answer cagily.
Zach raised a brow, wondering what his king wasn’t sharing with him. “So why do you think that it might be possible in the future if it isn’t right now?”
His leader’s eyes shifted, no longer looking at Zach, and he sighed heavily. “Do you trust me, Zach?”
“Yes,” he answered immediately. Kristoff had never once, in two centuries, given Zach a reason not to trust him. In fact, he was heavily in his debt.
“Then let it go for now. There are some things that I can’t share because I don’t know the whole situation myself. I only know that the opportunity will present itself for us to be able to rescue those women. I know it makes you edgy and restless not to go, but it would be certain death for you, Hunter, and Drew. Trust that as soon as we can accomplish the mission, it will be done.”
“Kat was right. I should have listened to her,” Zach mumbled, cringing as he remembered the angry and hurt look on Kat’s face as she had left that morning. “She doesn’t usually get angry. Not really.”
“She’s afraid. Her fear for you made her angry because she couldn’t reach you,” Kristoff said philosophically. “Maybe you need to learn to be a little more flexible. Compromise. Think about what you have to lose before you act like an idiot,” Kristoff suggested. “Try talking to her instead of giving her ultimatums.”
“I’m not sure she’ll talk to me.” Zach wavered between the desire to go and claim his woman and the need to see her happy.
“Don’t start,” Kristoff warned. “I know you think you aren’t worthy of her, but there has never been a woman more perfect for you, and you deserve her. If being with you wasn’t her ultimate happiness, she wouldn’t be your radiant. She loves you. Don’t blow this, Zach. She needs you every bit as much as you need her. Kat hasn’t had an easy life. You can change that for her, give her back the love she gives so unselfishly to everyone else.”
Even as Kristoff uttered the words, Zach knew he wanted to love Kat that way, give her everything she needed, protect her from anyone and everything that could hurt her. He already did love her that way…but he hadn’t told her. He hadn’t been fair to her earlier, and he had wounded her. God, that hurt. He had thrown away a miracle because of his own stubbornness. “I need to see her.” But he was beyond need, his urge more like desperation. “I hope to hell she’ll forgive me.”
“She will,” Kristoff answered smugly. “Charm her.”
Zach scowled. “I don’t exactly feel like Prince Charming when I’m around her. She makes me crazy. I feel more like the big, bad wolf that wants to gobble her up,” he rumbled, his thoughts wandering to their intimate lovemaking the night before, an experience that had been one of the most extraordinary moments of his life. “Will it get easier for me with her?” Zach asked, his deep voice betraying a trace of vulnerability.
Kristoff shrugged. “Probably not. But you’ll get used to the feeling,” he answered thoughtfully. “Being a dominant asshole is a Sentinel trait. But you can learn to deal with it.”
Zach stood, suddenly anxious to get to Kat. He needed to see her so badly that he could barely function. “Is she at her sister’s house?”
“She was. When I checked in on her, she was about to head for home. I’m assuming that meant her apartment,” Kristoff replied, not bothering to rise as he looked up at Zach and took another sip of Scotch.
“Thanks,” Zach said gruffly. “I’ll catch you later.”
Kristoff waved him off. “Go find your radiant. And try talking to her this time. You might want to just mention the fact that you love her,” he advised sarcastically.
Zach nodded once, determined to let Kat know exactly how he felt, insecurities be damned. He needed her, and he would make her happier than anyone else on earth could, because no one would ever love her as much as he did.
He transported without another word, his thoughts completely fixed on Kat, leaving Kristoff still seated in his den, a half-empty drink in his hand.
“Don’t mind me. I’ll just finish my drink and see myself out,” Kristoff muttered aloud in the empty den as he tipped his glass up with a sly grin on his face.
*****
“Damn it!”
Kat cursed as she entered another wrong total into her expense report that she kept on her relic of a computer. She got up from her wobbly chair that had seen much better days and went to her compact kitchen to get a bottle of water. As she rummaged through her refrigerator, she realized that she needed to clean it out. Everything was spoiled from disuse with her being gone for over a week.
Her week with Zach.
“Get him out of your head, Kat,” she mumbled. “He doesn’t want you. He didn’t even make a protest about you leaving. Did you really think he would?” She grabbed a bottle of water, ignoring the other items that were beyond rescue. She’d take them out to the trash later.
Returning to her computer, she plopped in the chair and shut the system down for the night. She wasn’t accomplishing anything. The chair creaked ominously as she leaned against the loose backrest and opened her water, taking a large swig.
She wanted to go home…to Zach. Okay, she was being stubborn, but she so wasn’t going to help him kill himself. Instinct was already clawing at her to return to him, try to talk to him. But her demon didn’t talk…he demanded, and there was no way she could keep her temper in check when he was contemplating something as idiotic as going back to the demon realm, nor was she going to help him do it.
“This apartment is depressing.” It wasn’t just the shabby atmosphere, it was also the silence.
She had always lived on a tight budget and she was used to the secondhand items and never spending hard-earned cash on anything she could live without. Previously, she had spent the money on Stevie. Now she was trying to save enough cash to go back to school.
The apartment was too empty, too quiet. She missed the sultry, sexy baritone of her Sentinel, and she wondered if he was missing her.
I might be his radiant, and he might want me because of that attraction, but he never said he loved me.
“He’s not yours, idiot. He has no desire for a partnership and he doesn’t respect or listen to you,” she muttered aloud, just to hear her voice break the silence. “He’s a billionaire demon. Why would he want a full-figured, brassy redhead with no accomplishments to her credit except a business that's barely afloat?”
“Perhaps because he adores her.”
Kat jumped as Zach appeared behind her. Her heart started pounding as she stood and turned, her heart in her eyes. He reached for a lock of her hair, letting it slide between his fingers as he continued. “Maybe he loves your bright, shiny hair and lusts after your lush body.” She trembled, as he added in a husky voice as their eyes locked together, “Or maybe it’s because he can’t live without seeing your smile every day.” He let her hair slide out of his hand and slid his arms around her, pulling her flush against his muscular body as he finished with a harsh whisper near her ear, “I actually think he’s just madly in love with you, Kitten.”
She shook her head against his shoulder, her eyes misting with tears. “Please don’t play with me, Zach.”
“I love you, Kat.” He pulled back, his glowing gaze colliding with hers. “I don’t want to live without you. I can't live without you.”
Oh God. Did she dare believe him? She didn’t think she’d survive if he didn’t mean it. Leaving him had ripped her heart from her chest, and she was still bleeding.
“I mean it, Kat. I’m sorry about this morning. You were right. I wasn’t thinking. I was reacting like a Sentinel demon instead of thinking things through completely. You were trying to be my voice of reason and I didn’t listen.” He sighed heavily before continuing, “I realize I’m no prize for you. I can be bossy and highhanded.” He cupped her cheek tenderly and caught a lone tear flowing down her face with his thumb. “But despite all my faults, no one will ever love you as much as I do. I guarantee you that. Stay with me for eternity, Kat. Fight with me if you have to, but don’t run away. My life won’t be worth a shit if you don’t,” he finished, his low voice broken and fierce.