by India Millar
“Excellent,” he said promptly. I was about to take my leave when a thought came to me and I paused.
“Kannushi, may I see the poor woman who may be Lady Keiko?”
The kannushi seemed surprised. I thought for a moment that he was about to say no, then he shrugged.
“Of course. It seems there’s nobody to mourn her. Her spirit will be pleased to receive you.”
I stared at the woman’s body. I felt great pity, and also great apprehension. In life, she might have been my sister. I shivered; in fact, she was so like me that it was almost like looking at my reflection. In death, her face was very tranquil. The kannushi handed me a bowl of clean water and a cloth, and I understood that I was to moisten her mouth, to give her the water of the last moment. It should have been done by her relatives just before she died; I felt honored that the duty should fall to me. The kannushi handed me my clasp, and I pushed it carefully into her hair.
“Please, may I pay for a decent white kimono to clothe her in?” The poor woman was dressed in a tattered kimono, and her skin looked dull and uncared for. “And if she could be washed, I would appreciate it.”
“Of course. All will be done as it should be. If Niko-san identifies her as Lady Keiko, then we will get word to Lord Tadatomo immediately. It may be that he will wish to claim her body and have her cremated and her ashes buried on his estate.” I shuddered at the thought. That felt wrong to me. I was sure this poor unknown would want her earthly remains to lie next to those she had known in life.
“I hope not,” I said impulsively.
“I doubt it myself,” the kannushi said impassively. “We must tell Lord Tadatomo truthfully that we don’t know how she died. If she stays here, we will intern her in the yujo graveyard.”
I knew that he shared my wishes. I waited until we had left my dead “sister” before I asked my final favor.
“I don’t believe I will need to use the temple’s house very much in the future. But unless you have a pressing need for it, I would be very grateful if I could keep it.”
“Our absent friend has been most generous in paying the rent on the house. It’s yours for as long as you need it.”
“Thank you,” I said simply.
The kannushi escorted me to the door of the temple. As I walked away, he spoke very softly.
“Take care, Kamakiri. I don’t want to find somebody else who looks like you on the steps of my temple.”
Twenty
Time doesn’t care if
We are rich or poor. Our life
Is not in our hands
I was ready. I was sure everything had been done that was needed, but I hesitated in my doorway as if there was an invisible barrier in front of me. I was torn. Partly, I was elated. I was about to start my new life with nothing to hinder me. How many women in this world could truly claim that they were as free as I was? There was no past to tug at me, nobody to order me to do this or that. Lady Keiko was dead; her bridegroom had accepted the word of the young priest who had delivered the message. He would mourn her passing. Or so he said. Odd, then, that he was perfectly happy for her to be interred in the yujo cemetery. Just as Lady Keiko was no more, it appeared that the anma Kamakiri had vanished from the Floating World.
I would listen carefully for any gossip about Lord Akafumu. In any event, I was satisfied that he was already on the path to irredeemable addiction. He was in the past, and I would put him out of my thoughts. Truly, my future was my own at last. I was free to recreate myself in whatever image I desired. Exhilarating as the knowledge was, it was also terrifying. I had nobody to blame except myself if my plans went wrong. Niko slipped her hand in my mine; I found her touch oddly comforting.
“Ready, Kamakiri?” she asked softly. I nodded.
My adopted name was the one thing I was carrying with me into my still newer world. Mantis. It seemed appropriate for what I was about to do, and a good omen. And apart from that, it felt right in my mouth. Lady Keiko was dead. Kamakiri the anma was gone, but she had been good for me. I would honor her passing with her name. And why not? Who was ever going to associate a wretched, blind anma with a woman who dripped jewels and walked as if she owned the Floating World?
“That poor girl!” Niko had been loud in her sorrow when she returned from Jokan-Ji Temple. “When I first saw her, for a moment, I was sure it was you. I had no problem at all convincing the priest about that, I promise!” With the resilience of childhood, her mood changed in a flash. “So, now that you’re dead and Lord Akafumu’s out of the way, what are we going to do? Are we really going to be ronin and roam about the country righting wrongs?”
Her enthusiasm was endearing.
“I’m sorry to disillusion you, Niko. But no, we’re going to stay right here in the Floating World. We have a lot to do, and if possible, I want to do it before Yo-san comes back.”
“Why? Isn’t he going to be happy about it?” The child was so shrewd, I wondered if she had read my thoughts.
“Probably not,” I said honestly. “But that doesn’t matter. As of today, Kamakiri the anma is no more.”
“Yes, elder sister.” Niko waited hopefully for me to tell her about my plans. When I explained, her face broke into a huge grin.
“Leave all to me, elder sister,” she said cheerfully. “I will take care of everything.”
All the arrangements had been made so smoothly, I was amazed. Niko’s knowledge of the Floating World helped, of course, but I was suspicious that she had managed everything so well on her own. So suspicious that I suspected the kannushi must have had a hand in it. When I challenged her with it, Niko turned innocent eyes on me.
“How could Aishi-san help us, Kamakiri? He rarely leaves the temple. He would know little of the practical workings of the Floating World.”
My suspicions intensified. How did Niko know the kannushi was called Aisha? He had never mentioned his name to me. Then common sense came to my aid. Just as Yo had insisted that I knew nothing about his mission, not even where I could find him if I needed him, I understood that Niko and the kannushi were protecting me now.
I smiled and let it go.
In any event, whoever had actually made the arrangements for my new life had done it superbly.
Niko left our old home in the temple house in the morning. A short time later, Kamakiri the anma entered an elegant little house in a reasonably quiet part of the Floating World. She was never seen again, and in her place Kamakiri, the sumptuous oiran, a courtesan of the highest caliber, emerged. I was deeply thankful that Yo was not here to see the transformation. He would not approve, and I had no time to waste in arguing with him.
I had thought long and very hard about what I wanted to do. What I was going to do. My first, overwhelming priority had been to seek vengeance for the destruction of my family’s honor. Now that I was sure I had achieved that in destroying Akafumu, I could move on.
Akafumu had not been alone in humiliating Lady Keiko. There had been others, and now the time was coming for them to receive justice for their actions. I anticipated their downfall eagerly.
In spite of my pleasure at the knowledge of what was to come, I still didn’t feel at all comfortable in my new persona. I put my hand up to pat my vast wig uneasily and Niko frowned at me.
“Don’t disturb it,” she scolded. “It’s perfect as it is.”
“You don’t think it has too many ornaments?” I questioned. “It seems to be bristling with them. I feel like a porcupine fish.”
“You look wonderful,” Niko insisted.
“Not too much makeup?” I felt as if I was plastered in white paint so thick it would crack if I smiled. Niko had painted my lips bright red. I had to resist the urge to lick them constantly. When she had shown me my face in the mirror, I didn’t recognize myself.
“You are an oiran, Kamakiri,” she explained patiently. “You must look like one. Without the expensive clothes and makeup and wig, you could be mistaken for a common woman of pleasure, a yujo. It has to be obviou
s that you are something much better class than that. Especially if you’re going to break with tradition and parade yourself around the streets.” She sounded so disapproving, it amused me.
“I have to become known,” I pointed out. “And I have no intention of getting a place in a teahouse. I need to be completely different from every other oiran in the Floating World. Very special. And it’s essential that I’m able to do what I want, not what my master tells me. Besides, I could hardly walk into a teahouse and demand to become their oiran, could I?”
“By the gods, no!” Niko was clearly horrified by the thought. “The other girls would never stand for an unknown usurping the place of the most sought after girl in the house.”
“You see? I have no alternative. We go, Niko. By the end of this evening, I want the Floating World to be buzzing with yet more rumors. This time, about a new oiran, one who is the most unique oiran ever to be seen in the place. Will you follow me, please? And remember, no matter who speaks to you, no matter what they ask you, stay silent. I want to be a mystery until it suits me to reveal myself.”
I stood very straight. No humble hunching of the shoulders and downward glance for me! My kimono was so gorgeous, it dazzled the eye. Lady Keiko would have died of shame if she had been seen wearing such gaudy robes. Kamakiri the oiran paraded proudly, her head held high. I walked slowly, but with confident strides, more like a young man about town than a woman. Unlike every other woman on the street, I looked at men I passed fully in the face and did not drop my gaze. My sumptuous kimono was tied very tightly to emphasize my slenderness and height. After a few minutes, I began to enjoy myself and relaxed easily into my role.
Men and women alike stared at me. I heard the murmurs that followed our progress.
“Who is she?”
“Where did she come from?”
“What’s she called?”
“Why hasn’t she been seen before?”
“Why isn’t she in a teahouse?”
“How does she dare walk the streets with only her maid for protection?”
“Whoever she is, she’s very glamorous.”
Within moments, Niko was approached by a man. He walked alongside us for the length of a street, pestering her with questions.
“Who is your mistress? Is she for hire? What’s she called?”
Wouldn’t you like to know, I thought smugly. Becoming bored with the man’s attention, I gestured to Niko to turn aside into a tearoom. I was delighted when a crowd immediately gathered outside, watching me sip my tea. When I rose to go—leaving Niko to pay the reckoning, as though money was beneath my notice—the crowd parted before me. One or two of the men even bowed to me.
Many of them followed us home. That pleased me greatly. It was essential that my house should be known. Niko told me that there were still some men lingering outside when we were ready for bed. She also said that the teahouse owner had refused payment.
“He said it was honor enough that an oiran of such magnificence as you should grace his humble establishment!” she said gleefully. “The gossip will be all over the Floating World by tomorrow.”
“Good,” I said absently. “Would you take Matsuo out, please? He must be in need of a pee, poor dog.”
Niko was still full of the excitement of our excursion. I could feel the unrest vibrating from her. She jumped to her feet at once and clapped her hands at Matsuo. He glanced at me for confirmation, and when I nodded, he walked after Niko, his tail wagging happily.
I blew the lamp out when Niko had gone. The closed air in the room felt as if it was drugged from the scented oil. I watched a spiral of smoke rise from the wick and waited until it had dispersed before I moved to the shoji. The screens were made of silk, opaque for anybody looking in, but far more sheer from the inside looking out. That had amused me when I had first seen our new house. Had its former occupant had the screens made specially, I wondered, so she could see without being seen? It suited my purposes perfectly, and I was pleased. There was a young moon in the clear sky, and I could see effortlessly when my eyes adjusted. I stayed very still, barely breathing. I knew that somebody was out there. The same somebody who had followed us all night, always keeping just out of my line of sight. A number of men had clustered around us continually, but they had wanted to be noticed by the new oiran, and their presence had been obvious. The unknown somebody had stayed in the shadows.
For a moment, I wondered if it might be Yo, returned early and amusing himself by watching what I was up to before he announced himself. I dismissed the idea almost at once. At our first meeting, I had only been aware of Yo’s presence because he had wanted me to know he was there. If he had not, even I—with my sharply honed senses—would never have suspected him. No. This man was clumsy. He had kept himself concealed, but with no great skill. He was not shinobi.
I waited. I cast no shadow in the darkened room and was completely still. My breathing was so shallow, I could barely hear it myself. Finally, my patience was rewarded. Unlike me, he had not been able to wait. I opened my eyes wide, trying to make him out. A tall man who walked with his shoulders hunched. Dark grey robes that merged into the darkness far better than black would have done. I could tell from the set of his head that he was staring at the house. Did I know him? I doubted that even a cat would have been able to make out his features; I certainly could not. I searched my memory for the way he walked, the way he stood, and an infuriating itch of recollection told me that he was known to me. I willed him to walk forward, but at the same moment, I heard Niko’s voice calling to Matsuo, and the man turned and walked away briskly.
I had a moment to think that was odd before Niko came back in. If he had been shinobi, he would have melted back into the shadows without so much as disturbing the air around him. If he were samurai, he would have stood his ground and made Niko walk around him. If he was one of the men who had been fascinated by me earlier, I was sure he would have taken his chance to try and bribe Niko to get some information about me.
Who was he? I didn’t know, and it irritated me.
Perhaps that was why I slept badly.
Matsuo curled up beside me, yelping and twitching as he pursued something in his dreams. I poked him in the ribs and he subsided with a deep sigh. Thoroughly awake now, I got up and stared out of the shoji for a long time, but I saw nothing but the shadows, coiling like sleeping monsters.
Matsuo grunted enquiringly, and when I didn’t go back to my futon, he stretched and walked out. I heard him lapping at his water. I could hear Niko’s even breathing. The child slept like the dead. For a selfish moment, I wondered about waking her, just for the pleasure of having somebody to talk to. But I did not. Instead, I simply sat until I heard the bells chime the toll for the hour of the rat, and then I lay on my futon and wondered all over again.
Twenty-One
What use is silver
And gold when I have all that
I want except you?
“Another one!” Niko was jubilant. The bell outside our house jangled and she came back with a folded sheet of paper in her hands. She handed it to me unopened, a frown clouding her face. “Do you think that you could find the time to teach me to read, Kamakiri?” She sounded humble, and I looked at her in surprise.
“Why? Not many women can read,” I pointed out. “My own elder sister, Emiko, can barely read and it never bothered her at all.”
“But you can read,” Niko said. “Can you write as well?”
“I can,” I acknowledged. I can read very well, and I am very proud of my beautiful calligraphy. Isamu had caught me looking at one of the books in Father’s collection when I was very young. He had teased me that there was no point in looking at something I couldn’t understand, and in a fit of pique, I had demanded that he teach me to read. It must have amused him, as the next day I found he had hired a young man to teach me to both read and write. I had found the lessons tedious and complicated, and it was only the knowledge that Isamu would gloat if I gave in that made me det
ermined to go on. After a while, I was glad I had persevered, and soon I realized that my stylish kanji were better by far than anything even Isamu could produce.
“Will you teach me, then?” Niko asked hopefully. She dug her toe in the tatami and looked down, and I understood that my bold, spirited younger sister was, for once, embarrassed. “I need to be able to read at least. When I go shopping, the merchants always have to tell me what the prices are because I can’t read what it says on the goods. They could overcharge me for everything and I wouldn’t know any different. And if we go outside the Floating World, I would be lost because I can’t even read the street signs. Besides…” She paused and I knew the real reason for her request was coming. “I would like to be as skilled as you are, elder sister.”
I was touched. “I can’t teach you to read and write, Niko,” I said. Her lips quivered and I went on quickly. “Teaching is a very difficult thing to do. I wouldn’t know where to start. But I’m sure if I ask Aisha-san, he will find one of his monks who could teach you. Would you like that?”
She beamed at me, all distress forgotten. “When?” she demanded.
“I’ll ask him next time I see him, I promise. In the meantime, could you make me some tea?”
I read the note she had handed to me while she busied herself with the kettle. It was short, and I read it quickly and put it down, disappointed. Like all the other missives that had been delivered this morning, it was from a would-be patron. And like most of the rest, it had obviously been written by a professional calligrapher. I was even beginning to recognize individual calligrapher’s styles. This was the third from the same hand. Cynically, I thought that the tradesmen of the Floating World should be on their knees before their household shrines, giving thanks for the arrival of the new oiran.