by Janet Dailey
'What are you doing up here?' Cord questioned, a hint of the softness remaining in his voice as he surveyed the pained, almost guilty look on her face.
'I came up here to—–' The truth of her intention almost escaped her lips before Stacy could stop it. Nervously she glanced to the grey stone that marked the grave of Dona Elena before her eyes slid to the marker beside it. 'Your father's grave,' she ended lamely, conscious of the narrowing eyes upon her. 'I was remembering my father and somehow I thought coming up here would make him seem closer.'
Whether he accepted her muffled explanation or not, Stacy couldn't tell. Gripping her arm in his hand, he steered her out of the small cemetery without any further comment. Uneasily Stacy glanced into his face. Whatever he was thinking wasn't reflected there,. The few minutes of silence were unbearable for her.
'How did you know where I was?'
'Your boy-friend saw you walking this way,' Cord answered, sarcasm seeping through his voice as his long strides carried them down the hill.
'Oh,' Stacy added faintly, as the steel grip propelled her before him.
She permitted herself a quick look down to the veranda before returning her concentration to the uneven ground beneath her. When they reached the edge of the cobblestones, Cord released her arm as if in distaste. A tight-lipped Carter handed Stacy her drink, his blue eyes examining the white pallor of her face.
'Are you okay? Where were you?' he asked quietly.
Stacy managed to nod an affirmative to the first question before Cord interrupted her. Swallowing a big drink from his glass, he stated in his derisive mocking tone, 'She was using my father's grave as a stand-in for her own.'
Carter's blue eyes studied Stacy's intently for a brief second before dismissing the explanation. But Cord wasn't finished.
'Giving in to self-pity is a luxury that this land doesn't allow, not for the people who live here.' The cold harshness of Cord's dark eyes penetrated Stacy's heart, sending the blood rushing to her face from the wound.
Cord turned away and started walking towards the area north of the stables where the preparations for the barbecue were going on. Stacy and Garter followed a few steps behind. None of the three spoke on the way. Cord seemed to ignore the fact that they were behind him and Carter only glanced Stacy's way once.
The trio passed the long lines of tables gleaming eerily in the waning light and continued towards the red glow emanating from a nearby stand of grease-wood trees. Cord slowed his pace so the three approached the fire at the same time. A long pit had been dug in the grove and a fire started in it. In the hazy glow, a form moved to shove another log into the fire. Stacy recognized Hank with a smile.
Adjusting her eyes to the flickering light, she studied the ingenious arrangement of the barbecue with interest. Curiosity overwhelmed the feeling of tension that had previously held her silent. 'Are those old beds the meat's on?'
'Army cots,' Cord smiled in answer. 'We wrap the legs in foil to retain the heat. The hands take turns tending the fire through the night and basting the meat with barbecue sauce.'
'Heavens!' Stacy exclaimed as she saw the enormous amount of meat on the metal slate. 'Aren't you going to have too much to eat?'
'We Texans have big appetites,' Hank snorted. 'We don't mess around with those tiny sandwiches like folks back East. If yore gonna sit here and watch the fire, I'll get some other things done,' he finished. As he turned away from the fire, he added to Carter, 'Might as well come along and give me a hand, I ain't as young as I used to be.'
Without waiting for an answer he tottered off into the dark. A twinge of fear clutched Stacy as she realized that Hank intended to leave her alone with Cord. She knew Carter was staring at her, waiting for her to say something to indicate that she didn't want him to go. She couldn't think of anything to say. With a stifled exclamation, Carter stalked off through the trees after Hank.
Cord was the one who finally broke the silence, his low voice drawling out, 'Well, you'll be leaving in another day. I suppose you're starting to look forward to if.'
'Not really,' Stacy answered truthfully in a quiet and unemotional voice. 'I've really enjoyed myself here.'
There was a slight pause as if Cord was mulling over her reply. 'I imagined you'd be glad to be going back where you belong.'
Involuntarily Stacy stiffened at Cord's phrase. A flash of her old anger returned at his pompous attitude of always knowing what would be best for her. She quelled the urge to make a retort and continued gating into the fire.
'Have you and Carter set a date for the wedding?' Cord asked, flicking a twig into the fire.
'No. That's something we'll probably do when we get back,' Stacy replied, not letting the hurt seep into her words. Her pride said it was better to let him think that there was going to be a wedding.
'You'll send me an invitation?'
'Of course,' she answered, straightening her legs and leaning back on her hands as she scowled into the fire. 'Are you going to send me one to yours?'
'Mine?' Cord queried, straightening slowly at her words.
'I forgot I wasn't supposed to know,' Stacy answered airily. 'Though why you wanted to keep it from me, I don't know. It's pretty obvious the way Lydia's always over here that there's more than just the burning embers of an old flame.'
'I see,' an amused expression on Cord's face as he stared at the charred legs. 'I suppose Lydia told you.'
‘More or less,' she replied. 'She did all but write it on the wall,' she thought to herself. 'Now that you're released from your responsibility for me, you can go your merry way and I can go mine.'
Seeing his dark head turn towards her in surprise, she added, 'I know about the letter from Carter's father too.'
'Carter's father? And how do you know?'
'You left the letter in one of the desk drawers. I must say you went to great lengths to see to it that I kept under your watchful eye. It's too bad you didn't let me in on it. We might have got along better if I'd known what was going on.'
'It didn't occur to me. You were a very headstrong girl. I only hope that Carter is successful in combating your more egocentric ideas.' Cord seemed to be secretly amused, which greatly irritated Stacy.
'Carter understands me,' she replied forcefully, lifting her chin defiantly.
'Oh, I'm sure he does,' Cord laughed. 'It's too bad he doesn't have more control over you.'
'If he had, I never would have come here and all this would never have happened.' Stacy's voice trailed off as a hint of melancholy crept into her voice.
'No, it wouldn't have' Cord agreed quietly, falling silent with her.
The crackling of twigs and rustling branches sounded the return of Hank and Carter.
'Ready to head back?' Carter asked her.
'Might as well,' said Cord, rising and extending a hand to Stacy before Carter could intervene. 'It's going to be a long day tomorrow.'
The ranchyard was packed with vehicles of every description from elegant El Dorados to broken-down ranch pick-ups. The auction itself had been over for two hours and the exodus of cars had just begun.
Stacy surveyed the long table that had been heaped with food earlier. So little was left of the vast quantities of meat, baked beans, potato salad, coleslaw, and breads that she sighed with relief that the appetites had been gauged so accurately. Already her group of ranch wives had started to clear the tables of left-over food.
'Are you through for the day?' Molly asked, a plump arm reaching out to fill the iced tea glasses.
'I've just been fired,' Stacy laughed, 'and ordered to join the fun.'
'Good. It's mostly all neighbours left now,' said Mary, hooking an arm in Stacy's and propelling her away from the table. 'You're going to witness a good, old-fashioned party.'
'Hey, where are you taking my hostess?' came the questioning laugh from behind them.
Halting abruptly. Stacy paled at the possessive tone in the voice. With a trembling heart, she felt the masculine hand rest on her shoulder
.
'Cord I' Mary cried, 'It's about time you got around to your guests. You've been with those horses all day.'
'I see you've managed to extricate Stacy,' he replied, smiling down at the silent form beside him. 'You did a wonderful job, Stacy. I'm sorry I haven't had a chance to tell you earlier or to give you a hand which’ you didn't need.'
'Thank you,' Stacy stammered, a flush filling her cheeks at his unqualified praise. 'But everyone has been good to me. I'm sure they covered a lot of my mistakes.'
'You're too modest,' Molly admonished. 'With someone as sweet as you, people just naturally take you to their heart and do everything they can for you.'
Tears pricked the back of Stacy's eyes at the woman's words. Knowing this to be her last day here, Stacy replied softly, 'You've all made me feel as if this is my home and I'll never forget any of you for that.'
Cord's hand tightened on her shoulder and the sudden pain forced Stacy to look into the tanned face. The questioning and confused look in his dark eyes rested on her face momentarily before turning to the other two women.
'This evening's party is doubling as a farewell party for Stacy. She's leaving us in the morning,' Cord stated grimly.
In the midst of the barrage of protests and objections, Stacy experienced a pang of regret at the ambiguous statements she had made about her leaving, always saying 'some time after the barbecue'. If only they knew how little she really wanted to go!
'Why are you leaving so soon?' Mary asked. 'I thought you'd be staying at least another week.'
'Carter has to be back the first of the week, so we decided to go together,' Stacy explained, ignoring the chill coursing through her as Cord removed his hand from her shoulder. 'We can share the driving and the trip won't seem so long.'
'The two of you are going alone?' Molly asked, frowning a little as she glanced at Cord.
'Tch, tch, Molly, you're showing your age,' Cord mocked. 'Remember this is the enlightened generation. Our moral codes are a little old-fashioned for them. Excuse me, I think it's time I mingled with some of the other guests.'
Despite the light tone of Cord's voice as he had chided Molly, Stacy caught the underlying thread of bitterness in his words. Embarrassed by the implication, she faced the two women self-consciously, ignoring the retreating broad shoulders moving through the crowd.
'Have you decided to marry Carter?' Mary asked lightly as the sounds of guitars and fiddles drifted towards them.
'No,' Stacy replied without thinking.
'Speak of the devil,' Molly muttered as Stacy glanced around to see the sandy-haired Carter walking towards them. 'So you're taking our favourite girl away from us tomorrow,' Molly scolded.
'How else will I ever get her all to myself?' Carter asked, wrapping an arm around Stacy's shoulders. 'Besides,' he added, noting the hidden pain in Stacy's eyes, 'a change of scenery might be advantageous.'
Stacy missed the glance exchanged between mother and daughter as she looked up into Carter's questioning, blue eyes.
'If you ladies don't mind, I. think I'll dance with our hostess,' smiled Carter, possessively moving Stacy in the direction of the strumming guitars.
At the edge of the dance floor, he turned her into his arms. He allowed a few steps to the tempo before speaking.
'What happened back there? I saw Cord leave before I arrived.' His blue eyes studied the troubled look on her face. 'What did he say to make you look like that?'
'It wasn't anything he said,' Stacy murmured absently, catching sight of Cord watching them from the fringe of the crowd. 'It's me, I guess,' she sighed, forcing her eyes to Carter. 'I just don't want to leave. I know it's the right thing to do.'
'Stacy, are you even sure you're in love with him? If I thought I had a chance—-' Urgency crowded out all caution as Carter gripped Stacy's shoulders. 'Marry me, honey. I can make you happy, you know that.'
'No, Carter.' The chestnut head shook negatively, agitation and indecision in her Voice.
'He's so much older than you. How do you know you're not using him to replace the father you lost?' Carter's voice grew desperate, and demanding. 'If I hadn't let you come out here, we'd have been married by now. Can't you see that, Stacy? You need an anchor. Let it be me. Say you'll marry me, Stacy, say it now before you regret it the rest of your life.'
'No I' Stacy fairly shouted, trying to stem the whirlpool of persuasion Carter's words were drawing her into. 'No,' she repeated more emphatically, turning from his arms to face the happy dancing throng before them.
'Think about it, Stacy. How can you be sure?' Carter rushed.
'There you are, Stacy,' came a masculine voice. 'Don't you know it's not proper for the hostess to run off in the middle of the party?'
Through blurring eyes, Stacy recognized the stocky form of Bill Buchanan.
'Doctor !' a frantic trill to her words as he grasped her outstretched hand.
'You don't mind if I steal her for a dance, do you, Carter?' Bill asked, a merry twinkle in his eyes. 'I'm too old to stand in line, and when the rest of the men get a good look at her that's just what I'd have to do.'
The doctor whisked Stacy into the; clearing where a lively tune was filling the air. As Stacy matched his bouncy steps, she momentarily glanced back to where Carter was standing. Her attention was caught by the tall figure standing steps away from him, separated only by the same trees in which she and Carter had sought seclusion moments ago. Forgetting her partner completely, Stacy stood motionless as terror raced through her at the realization that the turbulent fury flashing through Cord's eyes could only be caused by his overhearing her conversation with Carter. Suddenly Cord was moving through the dancers towards her. Hurriedly Stacy turned to her partner, ignoring his puzzled expression as she frantically hoped to lose herself among the other couples.
It was too late. The firm brown hand was gripping her shoulders as Cord expressed an abrupt apology to Dr. Buchanan and, without giving Stacy an opportunity to protest, forced her through the whirling couples. Away from the crowd, Stacy attempted futilely to pull away from Cord's hold.
'Let me go!' she cried desperately.
'Just shut up,' Cord replied sharply. 'You've done too much talking already.'
'It's none of your business what happened between Carter and me.' Stacy's temper flashed in her brown eyes.
'I'll decide what's my business.' The muscle in his jaw twitched as Cord turned her towards the hacienda.
'What do you want from me?' Her voice trembled.
'Some straight answers for a start,' said Cord firmly, his voice threateningly low as a couple crossed in front of them.
Walking on to the veranda, Cord muttered an imprecation as he caught sight of guests gathered by the pool. Without a hesitation in his stride, he turned her towards the knoll above the house. Realizing they were headed for the cemetery, Stacy glanced back at him suspiciously.
'Why are we going up here?' she demanded, slightly winded by the swift pace he was setting.
'It's probably the only place on this damn ranch where there aren't any people,' was the curt answer.
Reaching the top of the rise, he moved ahead, dragging her behind him, until they were out of sight of the people below. They stopped a few feet from the iron fence. Releasing her arm, he took hold of a breathless Stacy's shoulders.
'Why did you lie to me and let me believe you were going to marry Carter?' he demanded.
'What does it matter?’ Stacy moaned, trying to wrench herself free of his hold.
'Do you want to go back? Do you want to leave here?' When she failed to answer, he shook her. 'Answer me!'
'No!' she sobbed, fighting the answers he was seeking and the truth she couldn't bear him to know. Please, Cord, don't!'
'Why don't you want to leave?'
‘B-because—–' she stammered. 'Oh, Cord, please let.
me go.'
'Stacy, I can't, not this time.' His voice was suddenly tender and pleading. 'Not until you tell me the truth. This time
you've got to tell the truth.'
Tears ran unchecked down her cheeks as she gazed into his tanned face with disbelief. Desperately she searched for assurance that the loving tone she had heard was not a mockery. He pulled her closer, as one side of his mouth lifted in encouragement. He whispered, 'Don't look at me like that until you've answered me. Why don't you want to leave me?'
'Because——' she began, a flush filling her cheeks as a warm glow spread over her. 'Because I love you. Cord, I—-'
But his lips silenced the rest of her words. All resistance was gone as previously checked passions were unleashed in a burning embrace. When at last the fiery urgency was satisfied Cord's lips left Stacy's to travel to her eyes, cheeks, the curve of her neck as he whispered his endearments in the glory of love.
'Oh, Cord, Cord, I can't believe it,' Stacy gasped, thrilling at his every touch. 'You really love me?'
'I've loved you for an eternity.' His deep voice choked with emotion like hers.
'You were so hateful to me,' she accused, amidst another shower of kisses meant to silence her.
'I fell in love with you the day I found you lying unconscious on the plains. I knew then if anything happened to yon my life wouldn't be worth living,' Cord's voice was husky. 'When you recovered and said you were leaving in a few weeks, I knew I had to find a way to make you stay, to make you love this land as I do.'
'I do, Cord, I do,' murmured Stacy.
'I know. I've never told you how proud I was of you and the way you took your place with the men on the drive and did your share of the work, except on occasions,' he grinned.
'Were you jealous of Jim?' Stacy teased.
'I was jealous of anyone who touched you. Even your letters from Carter irritated me,' he confessed.