by Celia Kyle
For one second, looking into her swirling, red eyes, I almost believed her.
“Yeah. I gotta go.” I put more space between us and then spun, ready to climb into my car and put distance between us. “Thanks for the info.”
“I’d like to come visit sometime.” Her voice had me gritting my teeth. Why did she have to lie all the time? I glanced over my shoulder and she stepped forward. “I’d like to see him. You’d have to lift your ban first. The ninth circle of Hell is hardly an appropriate place for a brownie child to visit his grandmother.”
Grandmother. I shook my head, biting my tongue to keep from saying anything else. The gall of that woman… acting like we were family.
“Thanks again for the help,” I muttered and hurried away before she could say anything else.
If my uncle was the Prince of Lies, she was the Princess. The difference between them? While Uncle Luc was up front, my mother worked in the shadows.
Yeah, so that wasn’t happening.
I went straight back to Jezze and Momma R with what I’d discovered. It wasn’t much, but it was something. Between the gate thing and Killian’s vague “old dude suppressing his power” idea, we had a couple of different angles.
“Okay then, let’s do this thing.” Jezze reached for the first book and I plopped into the chair across from her.
“If you managed to narrow this down to two or three dems, I’m really on the edge of saying ‘fuck it,’ and beating the ever-loving shit out of them all. I’m tired of this playing detective bullshit. And, if I beat up a few that didn’t have anything to do with this mess… oh well.” I shrugged. “They probably did something to deserve a beating at some point.”
Jezebeth didn’t comment, but I knew she agreed. The witch had too much fun feeding my victims to gators to not be down with some ass kicking.
We were still researching when Sam arrived after a long day of cleansing drugged out souls. Exhaustion weighed on him, but I saw something else in his eyes too—purpose, joy, strength.
“How’s the search?” He leaned against the doorjamb, not coming any closer. Considering I was suddenly balancing on the edge of desperate need, that was a good thing. “I hope you’ve had better luck than me. I’ve run into nothing but dead ends all day.”
Since his eyes weren’t any redder than before, I figured his dead ends weren’t really dead and their lives hadn’t ended.
He strolled forward, dark leather moving with his muscular body. He slipped his jacket off, exposing his clinging shirt and the way it traced his muscles. The more often I saw him, the more I missed him. In my life, in my bed. A mate, but not a mate.
It was cliché—and so stupid—but Bry had filled some of the hole left in my heart when Sam had left. Now I was realizing that the hole had merely been glossed over by my love for my son. I still had a Sam-sized crater in my heart.
He lowered himself into a chair beside me, his scent drifting over and wrapping me in a comforting, arousing embrace. I shivered, desire sliding over my nerves, and my wolf whimpered in response. My mate. Our mate.
“What am I looking for?” His deep rasp sank into my skin and I swallowed hard, pushing past the arousal that clouded my mind.
I explained the criteria, nudging over the books we hadn’t yet checked. Hours passed, the three of us reading every word, no matter the language. I swear to On High, I’d never done so much reading and studying in my life. Of course, I grew up in the 1400s. It wasn’t like I went to high school.
We managed to cross off a few names, but there were still so many others.
I put the book down I’d been reading, staring at the ceiling and stretching my muscles. I was immortal, not invincible.
A delicate snore drew my attention and I lowered my head, spotting Jezze slumped forward, face buried in a book. I wiggled down in my seat and nudged her leg with my foot. “Jezze.”
She snored louder and I was pretty sure I saw drool escaping the corner of her mouth.
I kicked her in the shin. Momma R would have her ass if she drooled all over the books. “Jezze!”
She sat up with a start. “He was a frog when I found him.” I did not want to know. My friend blinked at me, eyes wide, and she brushed her hair from her face. “Whuh?”
“Go to bed. We’ve done enough for tonight.”
“But—“
“Bed. We’ve done all we can tonight.”
“Right.” She stretched her arms high over her head with a yawn, exposing her flat stomach and pushing her pert breasts higher. Yeah, I noticed these things, but not because I had sexy-girly feelings for her like I’d dug the lesbian siren. This was more about how Sam was reacting to the display. I shot my gaze to my left, eyes narrowed, and found him watching me with a smirk.
Bastard.
“I’ll see you guys in the morning.”
It was good the witch was toddling off to sleep. It was bad that it left Sam and me alone together. We’d been alone together plenty of times over the last few days. Of course, most of that time was spent tracking demons, beating up drugged out idiots, and keeping our minds on task and off each other.
In the middle of the night, alone in Momma R’s kitchen—closer to the coffee than the library—we had nothing to distract us from each other. I couldn’t have focused on the books if I’d wanted to. I found myself staring at Sam, noting his darker complexion and the deeper lines on his face. It gave him a handsome, weathered look, not the typical pretty-boy features of a normal gel.
He raised his head and caught me staring, our gazes locked for a long moment. The ticking hall clock timed our connection. One. Two. Three. I couldn’t look anywhere but at him. It’d been so long since we’d simply been together.
The yearning I buried, that I’d shoved deep into my heart, threatened to overpower me and I pushed it back once more.
“It’s good to see you again,” his deep murmur reached out for me.
“You too.” I tore my eyes away. Any longer and I’d beg for his touch—break every promise to myself and send him spiraling back down the path of the fallen.
I got up to pour myself another cup of coffee, needing something to do other than stare. But he wouldn’t let me run from him. He rose and followed me, stopping at my back and nearly pinning me against the counter. The wolf whimpered and whined, liking this show of dominance. Fuck, it loved the show. I laid my hands on the counter, fingers clinging to the flat surface and trembling while I fought the strength of my desire. I fought my wolf, I fought myself, I fought every cell in my body that craved him.
He touched my shoulders, large, warm hands a familiar weight on my flesh. But he couldn’t stop there. He couldn’t grant me mercy. He rubbed my back, fingers playing over my cloth-covered skin. I closed my eyes and let out a soft whimper. I hadn’t realized how tense I was until he began his massage. I don’t know if it had something to do with his divine grace, or if he was just naturally gifted with his hands, but his touch both eased and aroused me. Tingles passed through my body, muscles releasing their tension. But then a new tightness filled me, centering between my legs.
I bit my lip, breathing deeply and holding back a moan. He rubbed my back and shoulders harder, releasing the tightness from my muscles. The lower he dipped along my spine, the more I leaned forward, aching for him. I don’t know if it was an accident or my wolf taking control, but the new position thrust my ass against his dick. He pressed forward, and I could feel his hardness, his cock practically begging for my wet pussy.
Sam grabbed my hips, pulling me closer—tighter—against him. He grinded into my ass, the feel of him so close to my center ratcheting my arousal up even higher. I gripped the kitchen counter, leaning farther forward. This was the way my wolf wanted it—wanted him. I wasn’t one to be so vulnerable, but there was that part of me that needed to be claimed, to be dominated.
His hands roamed up my sides, sending chills through me, and goosebumps formed in his wake. He slid one hand into my hair and tightened it into a rough fi
st. I gasped, arching my back, the stretch pushing me roughly against his dick. Fuck, I needed. My clit twitched and my pussy grew heavy and ached with arousal. My nipples hardened, begging to be pinched and stroked and dammit, he knew that. He had to.
His other hand went to my hip and then dipped beneath the hem of my shirt. His palm skated over the soft skin of my stomach, sliding higher until he cupped my breast. I whined and rolled my hips once more, body moving without thought. He growled in response and a rush of ecstasy consumed me. A tug had my bra giving way, baring my breast to his attentions. He cupped and kneaded the mound before taking my nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Then, fuck, he pinched and tugged, adding a hint of pain to that overwhelming pleasure and need that thrummed in my veins. I couldn’t help but dig my nails into the countertop, scraping the Formica surface, and I didn’t give a damn if it’d piss off Momma R tomorrow.
Too good. Too hot.
One hand still fisting my hair, he let the other roam, ending his taunting of my nipple and wandering south.
I panted and hoped and got close to praying for what I wanted so badly. Fuck, I wanted. His fingers teased the waist of my pants, dipping beneath the denim for a moment before returning to my abdomen.
“Caith?” His hoarse whisper was a question filled with need.
I whimpered and nodded, waiting for him to give us what we both craved. It felt so good to stop fighting the urge, to let go and give in. A quick snap had the button undone, the rasp of the zipper lowering soon after. He shoved and yanked, my jeans falling to the ground, leaving me in my panties. My soaked panties, the cool air making me shiver with the chill.
He ran his fingers along one elastic edge and I thrummed in anticipation, cunt ready to be fingered, fucked, something. When he reached my center, he fisted my panties and tugged, tearing them and exposing me to the room. I whined and wiggled my half-bared ass. The smooth leather teased my sensitive skin and I cursed their presence.
His hand retreated, stealing the pleasure from me. A whine built in my throat, an objection I couldn’t put to voice, but I swallowed it with the next sound.
Another snap. Another rasping zipper. I gasped and fought him, anxious to have his length deep inside me. But he wouldn’t give me what I wanted, what I craved, until I thought I’d lose my mind. No, he pleased my wolf instead, growling at me to stay put, tightening his fist to hold me in place while he tugged his cock free. He rubbed his hard length between my ass cheeks, teasing me but withholding what we both ached for. He remained that way, rocking back and forth, silently telling me I could have this if I was a good girl, if I submitted to him.
But the alpha bitch in me didn’t want to submit. It wanted Sam, but only if he could over power me. It wanted to be taken.
I wanted to be taken.
So he pushed me forward, forcing me to press my chest to the countertop, to bare myself to him completely, utterly.
And that’s… I finally gave in, my wolf howling. “Sam,” I whined, the wolf’s voice melding with my own. It forced one other word past my lips. “Please.”
That’s when his dick traced the crack of my ass, teasing my back entrance for a moment. I held my breath, waiting, wanting and dreading at the same time. He could take me there and I would submit fully, granting him my full submission. The alpha bitch in me… was ready.
But Sam wasn’t and I almost whined in regret. Almost. Instead, the tip of his dick kissed my pussy, the head circling my opening. His grip held me immobile, frozen in place and unable to do anything to speed him along.
He pushed inside of me, large cock impaling me in one smooth thrust until our hips met. I cried out in pleasure, cursing his name as he filled me, had his way with me.
“Fuck.” I banged my hand on the counter, the pleasure overwhelming me in that split second.
Sam gripped my shoulder, pulling me back against him and forcing me to meet his every thrust. He grunted and growled at me, sounding more like a wolf than a fallen. That just added to my pleasure, my pussy rippling around his thick length. He fucked me hard and deep, his breaths coming out in heaving pants and my rapid heartrate matched his.
I was lost to him, in him, in what he did to my body. The wolf howled, thrilled to be mastered by its mate, and I let myself be carried away by the ecstasy and bliss of his fucking. My pussy tightened, milking him in a taunting rhythm that gave us both pleasure.
He tightened his hold on my shoulder, fingernails digging into flesh, and I reveled in that pain as if he were a wolf—a wolf biting his bitch.
I couldn’t hold back anymore, the bliss so intense I thought I’d burst into flames, scorch the entire house from the Earth with the height of my joy. My veins burned, the impending release striking out and sizzling along every vein. I panted and moaned, whimpered and groaned, in time with his every thrust and retreat.
Needed. Needed. Needed.
Then… I balanced on the edge, orgasm just out of reach and I stretched for it, searching for that overwhelming pleasure. Sam sent me teetering over the cliff with one last wolf-like action. His nails pierced my flesh, fingers cutting through my skin like the bite of a beast, and that was all I needed.
I fell over the edge, shoving the side of my hand in my mouth to muffle my screams while the roiling fire of bliss consumed me. I burst into flames, reveling in the heat of his cock inside me, his cock giving me such delicious pleasure.
I gasped and moaned, shuddering with the random trembles and shakes. The only thing that kept me from sliding from the counter was Sam, his hard cock still inside me, his hands still holding me steady.
He hadn’t come, but I don’t know why I would have expected him to. Gels weren’t supposed to fuck tweens. A gel definitely shouldn’t fuck the Princess of Hell if he was searching for redemption. A pang of regret tore at my heart, but I pushed it away. I had him. Not whole, but I had him.
Sam stepped away, slipping from my cunt and releasing me, and I stumbled back, nearly tumbling to the ground. He caught me, spinning me and tugging me into his arms. He swooped in and captured my mouth, shoving his tongue past my lips. I wrapped my arms around his neck, clinging to him and savoring the heated taste of his mouth. I wanted him all over again, wanted to be possessed and consumed by him.
But his hard cock was pressed against my stomach between us, a reminder that I needed to heed. I pulled away, stepping back and reaching for my jeans. The panties were a lost cause and I ripped them off, tucking them in my pocket. He tucked himself back into his pants, thumping his hard cock to make it go down, and he gave me a rueful grin.
He didn’t have to repeat On High’s stupid rules or explain why he hadn’t finished. Instead of hating what we couldn’t have, I would take what we could. I grasped his hand and tugged him to the living room, nudging him until he laid back on the couch. I snuggled on his lap and simply enjoyed the feeling of his arms wrapped around me.
“I needed that,” I whispered into the darkness, not wanting to break this peace.
“I could tell,” he softly kissed my temple.
I tilted my head back, twisting to look up at him. “Have I really been that tense?”
Another chaste kiss across my brow. “More so tonight than any other since I returned.”
I turned back around, folding my arms to hide my vulnerability. “That figures.”
“Why would that be?”
I didn’t want to tell him, didn’t want him to know there was yet another chink in my armor. But he started rubbing my shoulders, hands gently caressing me. It was hard to keep my walls up when I was so content and at peace.
“I saw my mother earlier.”
“Aaah.” He froze for a moment and then resumed his massage. “I take it things didn’t go well?”
“I… I don’t even know.” I leaned forward, giving him access to my sore muscles, skin sensitized to his touch. “She was…” I shrugged. “She was different. If I didn’t know better, I might have thought she was concerned for me.”
“That�
��s a surprise?”
“Concern from the sister of the evilest creature in existence?” I snorted. “Yeah. We never had a ‘good relationship.’” I even did the air quotes, using a joke to cover up the pain. “Everyone says a mother is supposed to be caring, you know?” Memories tried to surge and I battled them back. “Nurturing. But she… wasn’t.”
“But you’re not like her,” Sam assured me and I still wasn’t sure if I believed it. “You’re a much better mother than she could ever hope to be. You’re taking good care of Bry.”
My throat tightened, the continual worry surging forward. “I’m not. I can’t help him. I can’t make him better. He…”
He was gonna die because I was a failure.
And that… that truth was the needle that popped my emotional bubble. Every tear I’d gathered, every ounce of worry and pain I’d endured, exploded in one preternatural boom. I’d bottled everything, stuffed it deep and covered it up with dirt and stone, never wanting to explore those sensations.
Sam wasn’t giving me a choice. With his passion and soft touches, he destroyed my carefully built fortress.
I tried to hold it back, to put on the brakes and regain my hard-won control. I wasn’t this person. But, apparently, I was.
It started with shaking, trembles that had nothing to do with need and everything to do with holding myself together. I was going to shatter and I knew if that happened, no one would be able to put me together again.
Next came the silent tears, one after another while my chest felt as if it’d been captured in a vice. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think beyond the pain that surged. It turned into sobs, my body jerking with each one, and I found myself clinging to Sam, cheek resting on his shoulder.
His arms wrapped around me, comforting and strong, holding me flush against him. As if to say he was my rock, I could lean on him. Could I?