by Maura Seger
Alaric did not seriously consider that Colin might be in any danger, although he had already decided to wait only a short time longer before going to look for him. What troubled him most as he studied Roanna's wan face and red-rimmed eyes was the traitorous thought that for the first time in all the years he had known and respected him, his master just might be acting the fool.
Masking any hint of what was in his mind, he reassured his mistress once more before departing to work off his irritation and concern on the hapless men-at-arms drilling in the courtyard.
Roanna had no such ready outlet for her own anxiety. She found only minimal distraction in helping Lady Margaret and the other women clean the great hall. With the assistance of several servants, the matted, filth-encrusted rushes were removed, the floor and walls scrubbed, a fresh coat of whitewash applied, and new tables and benches set in place.
The work was hard but satisfying. With her sleeves rolled up, her hair tucked out of the way, and an apron covering her sensible linen tunic, she managed to expend a little of the nervous energy that threatened to explode within her. But by mid-morning she was still acutely on edge.
Her thoughts kept wandering back to Colin, to the way he had been since the attack on the stronghold, and, most particularly, how he had looked when he found her with Robert Her temper worsened as she reflected yet again on the injustice of his condemnation. If he meant to punish her by staying away like this, he was succeeding all too well.
The other women stayed prudently out of her way as she fiercely scrubbed and swept Though their gratitude to Roanna knew no bounds, not even Lady Margaret felt close enough to her yet to offer sympathy. They could only glance at each other worriedly and hope that his lordship would soon return.
Just before noon, he did. Roanna heard the men-at-arms guarding the gate call a welcome as Colin rode in. She straightened in sudden dismay. After the rigorous labors of the morning, she must look a fright Dropping her broom, she hurried upstairs. If she had to confront an angry, vengeful husband, she would do it looking her best.
By the time Colin entered his wife's chamber, she was seated on a bench near the window looking the perfect picture of serene femininity. Her apparent composure belied the frantic speed with which she had stripped off her soiled tunic, dropped a fresh silk concoction over her head, and hastily combed the tangles from her golden hair.
Her beauty swept over him as he missed nothing of the flush coloring her damask cheeks, her ripe mouth, and the glitter of her amber eyes which he presumed were caused by her pleasure at his return.
In fact, they were the outward evidence of apprehension that had grown throughout the long night and morning. But as Roanna took in her lord's disheveled appearance, anxious dread gave way to pure, unbridled outrage.
Colin's hair was mussed, his eyes red-rimmed, his chain mail soiled, and he sported a night's growth of beard. But none of that accounted for the fury that swept through her. It was the reek of stale ale and wine undercut by a musky perfume clinging to him that brought her to her feet, her small fists clenched and all sense of caution banished.
Sneeringly, she hissed, "I trust you had a profitable stay at court, my lord. It certainly seems to have taken its toll of you."
Colin's smile abruptly vanished. He was very tired, his head hurt, and he had a great deal on his mind. He was in no mood to cope with a spitting termagant.
Sitting down heavily on the side of the bed, he muttered, "Hold your tongue, woman. You have already displeased me far enough without being so foolish as to add to it."
Roanna's eyes widened in disbelief. Her temper, already so severely strained, broke all bounds. She took a step toward him wrathfully. "I have displeased you! Why you pompous boor! How dare you speak of my behavior when your own is such a model of indecency!"
For a moment, Colin's broad forehead creased in bewilderment He had no idea what she was talking about but that did not change the fact that he would not permit his wife to speak to him in such a way. His voice was dangerously low as he warned, "You forget yourself."
As near to him as she now was, Roanna could make out other telltale signs of debauchery. As though the perfume were not bad enough, mere was a streak of vermillion along his jaw. While she had no more experience with face paint than any other lady, she had no difficulty guessing the cause of the stain. The whores who thronged London used just such an artifice on their lips, cheeks, and even the nipples often left exposed by their blatant garb.
Tears turned her eyes to glittering jewels as pain twisted through her. Ignoring his warning, she blurted, "On the contrary, I have not said enough. Pray tell me, dear husband, how you spent this past night"
Colin paused in the act of pulling off his boots. He looked up at her ominously. "Do you suggest I need account for my actions to you?"
A harsh laugh broke from Roanna's clenched throat "I can well understand why you do not choose to. But at least, enlighten me as to who was so gracious as to offer you hospitality when you found yourself stranded for the night"
Colin shrugged, perplexed as to why she should give such importance to the identity of his host "I met again with the King and then with Odo. Our talk ran late. So the bishop gave me supper and a bed." More sharply, he demanded, "Does that satisfy your unseemly curiosity?"
It did, all too welL The prelate was renowned for the licentiousness of his household. His holy office did not prevent him from providing the most wanton entertainment for his guests. Far from concerning himself with the state of the souls he harbored under his roof, he counted it a matter of honor that no bodily urge need go unsatisfied. As in Normandy, his table groaned with an excess of dishes, wine and ale flowed in reckless abandon, and whores were ever ready to be tumbled.
More hurt than she would have believed possible short weeks before, Roanna faced him pale and trembling. The knowledge that he no longer desired her had been bad enough. But to be forced to confront his infidelity was more than she could bear.
Recklessly, she lashed out, "What a hypocrite you are! I saw how you looked when you found me with Robert You twisted our friendship into something shameful and blamed me for it Well, let me tell you, anything I felt for him was far better than whatever feelings you had for the tramp you dallied with last night!"
Colin's eyes widened in disbelief. For a brief instant he thought he must be dreaming. The furious shrew confronting him bore no resemblance at all to his beautiful, loving wife. But then, he reminded himself grimly, perhaps she no longer had any reason to be alluring with him. Now that she had rediscovered her Norman, perhaps she regretted ever allowing him to touch her.
Allowing? His face twisted unpleasantly. She had done a damn sight more than that He well remembered how frankly she had admitted her desire for him. Was she as forward with other men now that she had discovered the full power of her beauty?
His boots dropped with a thud. Rising swiftly, he crossed the room in angry strides. A flush darkened his rugged face and his eyes glinted like molten silver.
"Do you hope to hide your own guilt by falsely accusing me?" He seized her by the shoulders, shaking her hard. "Was there more than what I witnessed at court? Perhaps you long for that soft-skinned Norman. If so, you are doomed to disappointment No man takes what is mine!"
Roanna stared up at him in bewilderment He seemed perfectly sincere in his outrage, yet she could not reconcile his assertion that he was wrongly charged with the lingering evidence of his night's escapade.
Mindless of his harsh grip, she shot back, "Do you mink me an addled fool? If you truly thought to trick me, you should at least have bathed before coming up here! The stink of whore's perfume and the mark of her lips belies you!"
Whatever Colin had been about to say died in his throat He stared at her dumbfounded, the fury slowly dying from him. All that was left was hurt surprise.
"You thought..." Easing his grip without completely freeing her, he said slowly, "It is true there were women at the bishop's residence. Apparently, the
re always are .... I may well have picked up their smell ... and one or two may have gotten close enough to leave some trace. But that does not mean I laid with any of them."
His face hardened again as he demanded, "How in God's name could you believe me capable of such infamy? Whatever have I done that you would think I hold our marriage vows in such low repute?"
Roanna hesitated, wanting desperately to believe him. But the memory of his aloofness over the last few days prevented her. Dismally, she said, "What confidence can I have that you would not take another woman now that you no longer desire me?"
Colin had the curious sensation of having stepped into some twisting maze composed not of serpentine paths but of words that reflected nothing he knew of order or reason. Confounded, he shook himself as though trying to fling the fog from his mind.
"No longer desire you? By all the saints, that is the most demented charge you have made so far! Have your wits fled entirely?"
Her face was drained of all color as Roanna shook her head dismally. "You have made no secret of your feelings. Throughout the journey here, you could hardly bring yourself to touch me. And only the other night you turned away yet again when there was no reason why we couldn't have . . ." She broke off, the look in his eyes making her forget whatever else she might have said.
After the long, tension-filled hours at court, Colin's temper was strained to the breaking point The realization of how totally his wife had misunderstood his actions destroyed what little patience he had left
Between clenched teeth, he muttered, "Sweet Lord! When I think of the nights I lay beside you aching with desire but telling myself you needed time to get over DeBourgnon's attack. Now it seems I should have been less concerned with your feelings and more with my own!"
A mercurial glitter flared deep within his eyes. All restraint gone, he hauled her against him, heedless for the moment of her weaker body. Roanna struggled vainly. Prudence warned her she had better put some distance between herself and her outraged husband, but his overwhelming strength would not permit it
Lean, brown fingers tangled in the neckline of her tunic. The thin silk gave way shrilly, falling open to fully expose the honeyed length of her body. His molten gaze fell like a burning brand on the soft fullness of her breasts, her narrow waist and the ripe swell of her hips. Fear splintered through her as she saw his anger turn abruptly to lust
Twisting desperately, she tried to break free. But his arms were steel bands holding her remorselessly in place. In her struggles, her soft thighs brushed against him. Too late she realized her efforts had only aroused him further.
A low, triumphant growl sounded in his massive chest as he lifted her as easily as a feather. Roanna did not have time to take a breath before she was carried across the room and dumped unceremoniously in the center of the bed.
Colin towered over her. His silvered stare never left the naked loveliness before him. Quickly he stripped off his chain mail and sword. They fell to the floor with a thud, where they were quickly joined by his tunic and loincloth.
The sight of his exposed maleness finally broke through the paralysis of shock that had held Roanna motionless. For the first time, she knew only terror at the thought of being taken by him. His huge, pulsating manhood would hurt her badly.
Frantically, she tried to escape across the bed. But Colin was too quick for her. He dragged her back easily, his weight crushing her into the mattress. A sinewy leg thrown over her soft, slender limbs pinned her in place. Her arms were pulled tautly above her head. One large hand manacled both her wrists while the other moved over her insolently.
His voice was low and thick with anguish as he muttered, "Oh, no, my lady! I have a great thirst which may well take the rest of this day and night to slake. If you have any care for yourself, you will lie still and let me do as I wish."
Roanna had no choice but to obey. Never before had she known the full, unbridled extent of his strength. She was trapped under him, small and helpless. Not even DeBourgnon's attempted rape had made her feel so vulnerable.
Yet beyond her fear was another, even stronger emotion. In the moment before Colin's mouth came down on hers, she caught a glimpse of pain in his eyes, so raw and intense as to stun her. Dimly, it occurred to her that she had done him a terrible disservice. Rather than believing him guilty of such base behavior, she should have trusted him enough to speak openly of her concerns. Instead, she had failed in this, her first test as his wife.
As the acknowledgment of her own part in what was happening burned into her, her last efforts at resistance dissolved. Though it might already be too late, she could at least offer him the comfort of her body.
Yet even as she yielded, Colin's hard, demanding touch softened and grew gentle. He could no more hurt her than he could rip out his own heart His hand moved tenderly down the silken column of her throat to cup her breast He took the full heaviness of it in his palm, squeezing lightly, before his fingers closed round the rosy peak which tightened instantly at his caress. A low groan broke from Colin as her response shattered the last of his anger.
"Roanna! I've missed you so!"
Scalding kisses trailed over her shoulders and into the scented hollow between her breasts before his mouth at last closed over the straining bud. Roanna's slender body arched beneath him. Unable to deny the waves of pleasure undulating through her, she could only cry out softly at the warm, moist tugging that brought a piercing core of need to vibrant life within her. She had been so long without him that every part of her yearned for his full possession.
The callous rape she had expected when he threw her on the bed never happened. All rage vanished before the overpowering drive to give pleasure as well as take it In the burning firestorm of their need, neither could endure extended lovemaking. Her slender hips arched against him, mutely pleading for his possession.
As the full length of his hardness thrust within her, Roanna cried out. She was driven beyond any level of pleasure she had previously known. The world shattered into shimmering fragments. Shards of rapture tore through her. Colin was fully with her at that explosive moment when they shared the furthest limits of ecstasy.
In the aftermath of such utter fulfillment, they drifted easily into sleep, their arms and legs still wrapped around each other. During the night, the air grew ominous with the gathering force of a summer storm. Thick black clouds massed toward the west. Sky-wide fingers of lightning and long, rippling rolls of thunder presaged the sudden rush of rain that brought relief to the parched city.
So violent was the storm that it penetrated even their deep sleep. Half waking, they instinctively reached for each other. With the first desperate passion satisfied, Colin drove her over and over again to the brink of completion. Roanna writhed beneath him, welcoming the most daring caresses. The fresh-washed scents of fertile ground and verdant life blew over their heated bodies.
Stripped of all restraint and inhibition, she could not resist the need to know his body as fully as he knew hers. Her small hands pressed against his shoulders. "Please ... lie back "
Dazedly, Colin obeyed. Powerful tremors racked his body as she bent her head The silken mass of her golden hair fell across his loins. He could hardly believe what she intended. . . .
"Roanna!"
Her tongue flicked out again, surrounding him with warm, wet pleasure. A purr of delight rippled from her. She loved the way he tasted, loved the musky scent of him, loved how he arched into her. Above all, she loved the freedom he gave her to explore his body as he had hers.
Enchanted, she moved with instinctive skill. Her thumb and forefinger closed around him, stroking rhythmically as her tongue found the ultrasensitive ridge near his tip. The response was highly satisfying. She felt a pulsing inside her mouth before a few drops of salty liquid slid down her throat
Colin cursed inwardly. He had not meant that to happen. His self-control was perilously close to shattering. Another moment and he would have subjected her to an experience he thought only
the most knowing and willing woman should encounter.
His first efforts to pull away were thwarted. She was enthralled by what had just happened and wanted more. Not until Colin grasped her head between his big hands and gently lifted did she reluctantly relinquish him.
A gasp of surprise broke from her when he turned on her stomach. The soft pillows smothered her moans of ecstasy as his hair-roughened thighs straddled hers. Searing kisses fell from the nape of her neck along the delicate line of her back to the lithe curve of her buttocks. Sliding his warm, powerful hands down her belly to the hot, moist haven he sought, he raised her hips. Slowly, carefully his manhood thrust within her, driving them both to tumultuous fulfillment.
When they were at last able to breathe again, Colin laughed softly. Drawing her closer against his massive chest, he murmured, "Did you truly believe I no longer wanted you?"
Roanna blinked dazedly, trying to recapture the fear that had been so piercingly real only a few hours before. Her husband's explosive lovemaking had driven it so far from her mind that she had difficulty recapturing even the memory of her dread. "I. . . it did seem that way . . . although now I can't imagine why I didn't realize you were only thinking of my welfare. I must have been very confused. . . ."
Warm lips brushed her forehead tenderly. "Just because in the last few weeks you've been kidnapped, held hostage, introduced to womanhood, married, and almost raped you feel confused?" Huskily, he muttered, "I think that can be forgiven."
Roanna smiled against the velvet steel of his chest. His willingness to excuse her terrible accusations touched her deeply. She snuggled closer to him as his big hand caressed the silken fall of her hair.
Gently, Colin said, "I'm sorry for the way I acted when I saw you with d'Almaric."
"It doesn't matter." The warm strength of his body made her forget she had ever rankled at the injustice of his jealousy. "So long as you know I could never care for another man."
He was silent for a moment before asking hesitantly, "Can you forgive me also for my behavior this afternoon?"