by Platt, Sean
“Please, I can’t help you unless you help me first. I need you to tell me what happened. You’ve nothing to be ashamed of. Remember our talk and what I told you about fear, Adam. Courage isn’t the lack of fear, but rather, action in its face. Are you ready to take action?”
Adam didn’t nod, shake his head, or say a single word.
Keller said, “The only way to solve our little problem, and it is our problem, Adam, since your problems are my problems now. That’s what it means to have true friends. Our problems aren’t solved until you earn respect, and you’ll only earn respect if you target the strongest bully in the bunch and bring him to his knees. Are you ready to do that?”
“I can’t fight them,” Adam said. “Especially Morgan. Plus, my dad said you should always turn the other cheek, and use what’s in your head to avoid using your fists.”
The smile faded from Keller’s face for the briefest of seconds before returning.
“Your dad was only trying to protect you, and while his intentions were good, he coddled you, making you a victim afraid to fight back. And you know what happens to victims who don’t fight back?”
Adam shook his head. “No, sir.”
Keller slammed his open palms down hard on the desk, startling Adam.
“They keep being victimized!”
“What am I supposed to do?” Adam asked, his voice on the verge of a whine he hated to have. “The counselors all say no fighting. I’ll get in trouble.”
“I promise, son, good things are happening to you now. You’re my friend, so you won’t be getting into trouble again.” Keller leaned across the desk. “All you have to do is walk right up to the biggest bastard — I’m going to guess it’s Morgan — and punch him in the mouth as hard as you can. Then jump on top of him and keep hitting him until he’s crying and begging you to get off.”
“Really?” Adam said, excitement blooming in his chest. “Just like that?”
Keller smiled, his widest one yet. “Just like that,” he said.
“But what if he pulls a knife?”
“Then you pull this,” Keller said, reaching into his jacket pocket and pulling a black cylinder from the interior. It looked like two fat pens stuck together, with one tip.
“What’s that?” Adam asked, leaning across the desk.
Keller slipped the cylinder into his hand. Adam stared, his eyes widening as he moved it from one curled palm to the other, feeling the weight in his hand; slightly heavy, though still lighter than it looked — no reason he couldn’t carry it in his pocket and use it when needed.
“It’s a mini-stunner,” Keller said. “They’re highly illegal; simply carrying one on your person can get you into a world of trouble. Then again,” he smiled, as wide as before but darker. “Your friends aren’t supposed to be carrying knives in the orphanage, either, right?”
Adam nodded.
“The trick is to keep the stunner hidden in your hand and not let anyone see it until it’s too late for them to do anything about it. My best advice, young Lovecraft, is to sneak up on Morgan and punch him as hard as you can. If he manages to get up from the ground, even after you’ve given him your best knuckle sandwich, squeeze the buttons on either side of this little beauty and hit him with the tip. It delivers a powerful shock that will knock him out for a few minutes. I suggest you spend those minutes beating him to within an inch of his life.”
Adam was breathing so heavily in nervous excitement that he thought he might hyperventilate.
“You got that?” Keller asked.
Adam nodded, then said, “Are you sure? Maybe I should just let things go and hope Morgan, Tommy, and Daniel forget about it.”
“They won’t forget,” Keller said. “That’s not how bullies operate. The only way to deal with a bully like Morgan, or his minions, is to teach them a lesson — one they’ll never forget.”
“When should I try?”
“Don’t try,” Keller said. “Do. I suggest waiting until lunch, dinner, or TV Hall later tonight. Do it soon, and I’ll discuss the situation with your counselors to make sure everything runs smoothly and nothing stands in your way.”
Adam stared at Keller, without any idea what to say. “Why are you doing this? You put my dad and sister in jail. Why are you being so nice to me?”
“Because, son, I don’t hold the sins of your father or sister against you. Plus, you remind me a lot of my own son.”
Adam’s next words fell out in a whisper. “You have a son?”
“I did, but he died in a bombing by The Underground several years ago. I see much of him in you — a quiet intelligence and kindness that stupid people mistake for weakness. The City should look up to kids like you, helping them grow into tomorrow’s leaders, rather than turning them into tomorrow’s troubled prisoners and Quarters scum. Now,” he gave Adam one final smile, “get out of here and make me proud. We’ll be talking soon.”
“Thank you,” Adam said, then left the schoolmaster’s office feeling a foot and a half taller.
Adam held the mini-stunner in his pocket. Like Keller’s warm smile and promises, the tiny weapon filled him with confidence.
He waited all day for one of the trio to mess with him, almost eager, though he’d never sought confrontation before.
After a late afternoon snack, with his tray cleared and the Chimney Rock gruel swirling in the pit of his stomach, he nearly bumped into Jayla. She smiled, but only for a second, hanging on the top of another look Adam couldn't place — sort of afraid, but mostly confused.
Her friend — a girl Adam had never seen before, and not one of the original three who had been with them in the kitchen — had kept walking and called back for Jayla as they headed to the classrooms. The half-smile fell from her face, and she ran after her friend without a word to Adam.
He felt an odd sort of empty inside, all shell and no meat.
The day’s remainder passed without incident. Adam ate his rations at dinner, as alone as he’d eaten his breakfast and lunch, feeling a fresh and horrible sort of invisible. Sick to his stomach, he barely picked at his rations, chewing without tasting, and swallowing without chewing. He dumped his tray, still half full, into the trashcan. He may have been the only one in the orphanage to do that. Even terrible, it was still food, and the only choice they had.
Adam set his empty tray on the stack, then headed for the bathroom.
He stepped inside, glad it was empty. The last thing he wanted was to be stuck in the bathroom alone with another boy — always so awkward, even when he was only going number one.
Adam opened the empty stall, then sat to pee like always, feeling the usual flutter of guilt for not standing like his father taught him. His heart fell to his belly as he heard the door swung open and bang into the wall, followed by the unmistakable voice of Morgan.
“So, Freak, I heard you were called to the office today. What was that all about?”
“Nothing,” Adam said, his voice quivering from nerves. He still had the mini-stunner in his pocket but was suddenly afraid to use it, especially once he heard Tommy and Daniel were outside the stall beside Morgan.
Tommy said, “I can smell your shit,” even though Adam was only going piss.
“Hurry the fuck up,” Morgan said. “We’d like to kill you before it’s time for pudding.”
He couldn't use his mini-stunner if all three attacked at the same time. Adam thought of a hundred questions he wished he’d thought to ask Keller, starting with how many charges the stunner was good for.
Morgan’s fist was on the stall door as his voice echoed off the bathroom walls.
Adam prayed for someone to come in.
“Bullshit,” Morgan said. “You ratted us out again, didn’t you?”
Adam said nothing until Morgan’s fist beat on the stall hard enough to scare him into an answer. “No,” he squeaked, hating himself for feeling so small, especially with the stunner in his pocket. “I didn’t rat you out to anyone. They took me to the schoolmaster’s o
ffice, but I didn’t say a word!”
“Bullshit!” Morgan yelled.
Suddenly the stall door burst open, breaking the latch, the piece of metal flying straight at Adam’s chest before falling to the ground.
Adam jumped, yanking his pants up as the three boys laughed and rushed at him, pulling him from the stall and throwing him to the ground.
Before he knew what was happening, Morgan’s hand was deep in Adam’s hair, fingers curling into a clump and dragging him back to the toilet by the root. “Admit you ratted us out, freaktard!” Morgan screamed.
Adam said nothing as Morgan shoved his head into the toilet. His nose and lips dipped into the urine-filled bowl, getting piss all over his face, into his mouth, and up his nose.
Adam choked, spitting and gripping either side of the bowl with both hands, trying to push himself back up as it felt like a hundred hands were on him, forcing him back down, his head into the water.
Adam was certain he was going to die.
Then he was yanked back, choking, gagging, eyes stinging in piss, as Tommy yelled, “Admit it!”
Before he could say anything, they shoved him back down, laughing hysterically as he grew certain that he was going to die right here and now without ever getting a chance to use the weapon Keller had given him.
“Admit it!” Tommy screamed again.
Adam wondered why nobody could hear what was going on. Why hadn’t anyone come to his rescue?
The three bullies continued lifting him up, telling him to “admit it” and then shoving him back down until Adam finally realized the bastards didn’t care whether he admitted a thing.
“Fucking freak!” Tommy said, kicking Adam hard in the back.
The three of them backed away, laughing as Adam sobbed, crumpled over the toilet in pain, humiliated, wet, and reeking of piss.
Maybe it was the horrible bray of their laughter; or the way they left him helpless, hurt, and humiliated; or maybe it was because he had been stupid enough to believe their friendship.
Whatever it was, he’d had enough.
Adam found his power and got to his feet.
As the three boys were filing out the door, Adam yelled, “Hey, fucker!”
Morgan was the last one through the door. He turned back, face twisted in surprise and anger. Adam raced at him, mini-stunner concealed in his hand until the last possible second.
He squeezed the buttons on either side and thrust it into Morgan’s chest.
Morgan’s eyes shot open, with his mouth, a scream trapped as he clutched at his chest and fell to the ground.
“What the fuck did you do?” Tommy called out, staring down at Morgan as his entire body was caught in violent spasms.
Tommy and Daniel looked up at Adam like they were going to kill him.
Adam thrust the mini-stunner forward, not even sure if it had another charge in it, and screamed, “You wanna die?”
The boys took a step back, and then everyone’s attention was pulled to Morgan, who was shaking worse, his eyes rolling back into his skull as pink foam bubbled from his mouth in a river of phlegmy blood.
No one said a word; everyone was silent with no one knowing what to do until Morgan stopped twitching. It was a half-minute before anyone spoke.
“He’s dead,” Tommy whispered.
Daniel dropped to his knees and felt for Morgan’s pulse. He looked up at Adam, and his face went from menacing to frightened child in one terrifying moment. “You killed him!”
Without another word, both kids ran from the bathroom.
Not knowing what else to do, Adam waited another minute, then slipped from the bathroom, making it a few feet before he heard Brian Bob behind him.
“Stop right there, Lovecraft!”
Brian Bob grabbed him by the scruff of his neck and led him back into the bathroom, where he fell back against the wall in surprise a second after opening the door.
His giant hand tightened around Adam’s neck as he barked into the comm on his collar. “We’ve got a situation here — I need City Watch ASAP!”
Adam pled through the four minutes it took for the Watchers to arrive, then through the two minutes it took for them to roughly wrap his hands behind his back and fix him with restraints.
“Keller said it was OK,” he pled, over and over, more than a dozen times before they reached the ground floor of Chimney Rock, each time followed by, “He gave me the stunner to protect myself! Please, you have to call him. He’ll tell you it’s true.”
The Watchers ignored Adam, dragging him through Chimney Rock, kicking and screaming, out the front doors of the orphanage, down the steps, then into the back of the open City Watch van.
CHAPTER 29 — Anastasia Lovecraft
For several minutes following their escape from the barn, the only sound was the clomping of snow as Liam and Ana trudged numbly through the melting slush beneath the midday sun.
Neither of them said anything for what felt like forever, walking under the weight of their collective guilt and shared grief.
A cool breeze shook the pines above them, the sound soothing, calming her more with every step. Once confident enough in her anger’s containment, she opened her mouth and asked the questions she’d been holding inside.
“Why did you do it?” she asked, ignoring the Network orb hovering above — if they didn’t want citizens to know about her father’s being a part of The Underground, they’d either sever the audio or switch the broadcast feed. “Why did you betray my father?”
“Your dad was one of the finest people I’ve ever known,” Liam said instantly, as if he’d been waiting for the question. “That’s why I was angry when you assumed he was guilty.”
Ana expected Liam to say more, but he fell silent as they continued to slosh through the snow and another minute’s worth of tension-tainted silence until she finally turned to face him.
“No,” she said, “you don’t get off that easy. You betrayed my father, Liam, and I’m on the wrong side of The Wall because of you. You owe me an explanation!”
“No,” he said. “I don’t. I owe you and your father my life, and you can both have it. That’s fair, but that’s all you get.”
He kept walking, trying to avoid more conversation.
What an asshole!
“Fuck you, Liam. If you can’t be straight with me, I’ll take my chances without you.” She took a step toward him. “And I mean it. You know how stubborn my father is. Well, I’m no different. So what’s it gonna be?”
He said nothing, and for nearly a minute Ana almost believed Liam would call her bluff, then turn around and head in the opposite direction.
Finally, and without looking at her, he said, “City Watch targeted my girlfriend.”
Ana could tell he wanted to cry, even though she knew there wasn’t a chance in hell that he would. “If I didn’t play ball, she would’ve been killed. I had no choice.”
“You had a girlfriend?” Ana said, not meaning to fill her voice with surprise but unable to stop.
“Yes.” He turned his eyes.
“What was her name?”
“Chelle, and she was sweet, Ana, the nicest girl I ever met. You would’ve loved her. Anyway, Chelle got pregnant. The pills didn’t work, and we didn’t have a voucher. The baby was scheduled for termination, but we applied for an adoption waiver. But she never intended to give it up, or if she did, it was only at first. Chelle wanted to keep it. More than anything.”
“Why?” Ana wondered out loud.
There were plenty of citizens unable to have kids, who were eager to adopt a child, so long as it wasn’t a Quarters kid. It didn’t make sense to risk prison, Watchers, or ejection from The City, when you could get pregnant again with a voucher.
Ana asked, “Why not give the child a safe home through adoption?”
Liam shrugged. “I’m not exactly sure, since Chelle gave me 150 different answers, depending on the day. She was insistent, and more stubborn than you, if you can believe it.” His vo
ice made another tiny crack, letting Ana know the worst was still inside.
“We didn’t know what to do, but that was the first time I’d ever seriously considered leaving The City. There’s a secret village in The Barrens where I thought we could go.” He dipped his voice to a whisper to protect their discussion from the orbs.
“I tried to set everything up, but passage doesn’t exactly happen overnight. Someone reported Chelle, and City Watch came to get me. They knew I was Underground, and said if I wasn’t willing to supply them with information, then they weren’t willing to let Chelle go. They’d already arrested her, and they assured me they would dispose of our baby, and in case that didn’t make me budge, they made it perfectly clear how easy it was to eliminate Chelle.”
Ana gasped, “Oh God!”
“Yeah,” Liam sighed. “So I started helping — barely, but enough to keep our baby alive; a few things here and there while Chelle was in custody, which ended up being a lot longer than expected. I reported a few citizens whose arrest wouldn’t affect the cause, and a couple of people who deserved it for one reason or another.”
Ana didn’t like Liam playing junior Watchman, judging who was deserving of punishment. She let it go, knowing it was more important to hear the rest of his story while they had a moment’s respite from the dangers of The Games.
“No matter how much I gave, the Watchers wanted more, and then more after that. Then they wanted something big…or else…” Liam paused, clearly not wanting to finish the sentence.
Ana stared into his silence, swallowed, then said, “So you gave them my father?”
“I had to,” he admitted, shaking his head. “I didn’t want to. But I never thought any of this would happen.” He gestured around him, as if piles of snow and naked trees were murdered mothers and guilty fathers. “I didn’t think I gave them enough to go on, especially since your father covered his tracks well. I’m sorry.”
Ana could feel her face flushing red with anger. She said nothing for fear she would scream.
Liam spoke instead.