by Unknown
The rest of my first week at DPI passed by in a blur – I arrived only a few weeks in to the first semester so I was not too terribly behind the rest of the students. I got used to my classes in no time and quickly caught up on most of my classwork. I had decided not to show my face in the horrible lunchroom; instead, I packed my book bag with granola bars and kept a bottle of water handy. Dinner in the cafeteria is mandatory at DPI, as it is at most boarding schools. Because board is paid as part of tuition, the school monitors students who consistently don’t show up for meals so that parents can know their money is being used appropriately. But I made sure to arrange to go with Rory or Emily whenever I could. Both of them knew just about everybody and I felt more at ease having them near me.
Evenings were hard. I hated sitting alone in my dorm. My mind invariably drifted to thoughts of my mother. So I used the commons area for reading and then began to spend as much time as possible in the library.
Mia and I were still having a hard time reaching each other by phone. She tried calling me as soon as she got out of school but I was still in class at that hour. Then I tried calling her as soon as I was done with classes, but she was already at work by then. Next, she started calling me from the “L” on her way home at night – at that hour I am actually in the dorm. Finally, a time match!
“So Ava, how’s it going, are you hanging in there?”
“It’s fine, I guess. I miss you.”
“I miss you, too; nothing is the same here without you.”
Mia was careful not to bring up my mother. I think she felt uncomfortable to talk about a subject that made me so sad, and really I wasn’t eager to talk about Mom either. I could not stop the tears that flooded my eyes and my voice...
“Have you met anybody yet? Tell me about some of the people there.”
“They are all actually really nice, aside from a couple of snotty rich girls. You would love my suite mate Emily; you two are exactly alike. I hang out with her and her friends sometimes. I met this guy Rory. He’s great. He showed me around the campus and the town.”
“And?” she said, drawing the word out a little longer than necessary.
“And nothing, that’s it.”
“Oh, Ava please; it sounds like he likes you. Is he hot?”
“He is hot, actually, but I don’t like him like that.”
“Bummer, are there any other guys?”
“Of course, Mia; I live in a co-ed dorm.”
“Whatever, Ava; you know what I mean.”
“I dunno… there is one guy, he lives right next door. He is absolutely gorgeous...and nice, too.” I whispered into the phone, remembering the thin wall Ari and I shared.
Mia squealed, which is rare for her. “Details! Now!”
“I just gave you details. That’s it. He could have any girl he wanted. I’m me, so there’s no chance in hell he’ll give me a second thought.”
“Ava,” Mia sighed, “you don’t see yourself clearly. You are drop-dead gorgeous and the most intelligent person I have ever met. Honestly, you are probably too good for him.”
“So what about you?” I said, changing the subject. “Any new guys in your life?” This question could keep Mia busy for hours.
“Well, yes, actually there is. Oh, my gosh, Ava, he is so perfect. His name is Jack; he is super cute and funny. We’re just texting right now but I think it may go somewhere. He’s friends with a guy I work with, but he came in one night just to see me!”
“Aw, Mia that’s great. I am happy to hear it.”
“Thanks! I haven’t told you my good news yet.”
“You mean Jack isn’t your good news?”
“Not this time! My mom got me a plane ticket for my birthday to come see you!”
I actually screamed in to the phone. “No way!”
“Way! Figure out a good weekend and let me know. Mom says I can miss only one day of school, so make it count.”
I was smiling into the phone. This was the best news I had had in weeks. Mia hung up to attend to a new flirty text from Jack that needed her full concentration and I had studying to do. But the good news stayed with me, front and center in my brain.
On Thursday night, I headed back to the dorm later than usual from the library. When I got off the elevator, I found the commons was packed full of people and music was blaring from the speakers. Emily bounced up to me and linked her arm through mine. “Where have you been? It’s Thursday! Remember our party?” I unhooked my arm from hers and took a step back.
I had completely forgotten that our floor partied on Thursday nights. I didn’t really care about the parties, but they would help keep me pre-occupied. I apologized to Emily and promised that I would be out as soon as I took a shower and changed. One quick glance at the people already in the commons had told me my jeans and shirt wouldn’t cut it. I took a fast shower and opted for one of Margaux’s more casual, shorter dresses – navy with a little white bird print. The dress was perfect with my favorite pair of flats. I spent a little more time than usual putting on makeup and then finally came back out of my room.
Emily was talking with some of the girls from the floor; I walked over to join them. They were planning a group-shopping trip to Los Angeles for Friday and since I had no homework and no home to go to, I agreed to tag along. One of Margaux’s largest stores is in L.A. and she had told me I was welcome to go there any time to shop with her. I sent her a quick text letting her know I would be in on Friday with friends. She actually texted me back staying that would be great. Every time Margaux had come to Chicago, she had insisted on taking Mia and me to baio for a girls’ day out. I always suspected she planned the girls’ day because she really likes Mia. Mia worships Margaux’s every move, and if there is one thing Margaux loves, it is flattery.
The party was picking up. I tried as hard as I could not to care about Ari. I refrained as long as humanly possible from looking around the room for him. As soon as the shopping plans had been made and our conversation died down, I allowed myself one quick glance around the room. I saw him right away leaning against the back wall, looking as good as ever, but this time he had a girl hanging from his arm saying something in his ear. The girl was tall and skinny and she had jet-black hair that came to a sharp angle right at her jaw line. It was perfectly straight without a hair out of place. She had dark eyes but pale, crystal-clear skin and big, full, naturally red lips. She was perfect for him and my heart came crashing down to earth in a million little pieces.
Ari noticed me looking and I was extremely thankful that at that very moment Rory came up to steal my attention away.
“Having fun?” He asked, holding a beer in his hand.
“Yeah, sure, I guess,” I answered somewhat honestly. This party wasn’t the most fun I had ever had but it beat wallowing in a pool of my own tears.
“Oh, come on, this is great; here let me get you a drink.”
“No, no thank you, I don’t drink.” I said, looking around and noticing that I was one of the very few people not drinking at the party.
Rory continued talking to me and I listened for a bit and then zoned out. I felt like a jerk for not listening, for not being as good a friend to him as he had been to me, but I couldn’t help being seriously bummed out. After a bit, I excused myself from the group and started walking back to my room. I allowed myself one more glance at Ari, but he was nowhere in sight and neither was his pretty friend.
I went back to my room, put on a tank top and a pair of boxers to sleep in, and crashed hard. I quickly found myself back in a nightmare. This time I was in the dimly lit hospital, a nice reprieve from reliving my mother’s death. I walked the halls and listened to the cries of all the people behind the doors. I did my best to drown out the insults some of the people were throwing at me and through the din, I heard someone calling my name, not in a begging way, but just saying it to get my attention. I stopped at the door and read a name that I did not recognize, Maya Xenos. I could hear her in there calling to me. I could hear
monitors beeping in the background.
I hesitated for a long moment. I nearly turned to walk away until I heard a quiet “please” call out to me from the other side of the door. I turned back and opened the door out of curiosity. In the room, I found a tired, lovely older woman sitting up in bed. She looked incredibly ill. She was defying an obvious need to be lying down, her eyes were shrouded in dark circles and her skin seemed too loose for her frame. Her face lit up when I walked in and that surprised me a bit. This woman was not recognizable to me, but she clearly knew exactly who I was. She beckoned me forward; I took a few steps, and then stopped, standing at the side of her bed.
She held me in a long hug. When she finally spoke, her words were quiet and breathless. She asked me to help her, to save her and allow her more time. She motioned to a little boy, who could not have been more than two years old, curled up on the bed next to her, asleep. I looked around the room and it was far different from the room Perry was in when he visited my hospital nightmare. The room was old, but still beautiful. The walls were made out of large stones and were accented by charming, handcrafted furniture. There was a window that peered out into a garden, but my mind would not allow me to focus on anything beyond the garden.
The little boy was darling, his cheeks chubby and round and his little fingers were so delicate. The backs of his hands had little round dimples for knuckles. I had an unbelievable urge to scoop him up, hold him to me tight and kiss his little, creased forehead. I looked back at Maya, not understanding what she was saying or what she meant. I could tell that she was dying, and I gathered that she was the only person the little boy had left. Maya gestured to a clock. It showed the year, month, day, hour, minute and second. It was off by an hour. I looked back at her puzzled.
“I’m sorry,” I said, “I don’t understand.”
She took my hand and put a red thread in it. The same type of red thread my grandfather had showed me right before he died. The thread was pretty, delicate and weirdly strange. Hues of red colors swirled throughout it. I looked up at Maya confused. Certainly, she did not want me to cut it.
“Pull,” she said, nodding her head in an attempt to encourage me to pull the thread. I held the thread in my hand and after a moment’s hesitation, I pulled and I watched as the thread began to stretch. I continued to stretch the thin thread and as I did, her face became less tired and she was no longer struggling for breath. The dials on the clock turned rapidly as I pulled and she smiled at me and touched my face softly.
“You are not like the rest, Ava Moirai; you are capable of good.” She kissed both of my cheeks and I awoke with the blink of an eye.
Getting out of bed, I was confused and decided to head towards the kitchen for some coffee. Just as I closed my door, Ari’s opened...but it was not Ari coming out from his room. It was the girl that I had seen him with the night before.
“Oh, hi, you startled me,” she said politely, in a British accent.
I gave her a smile as I peered into Ari’s room. I couldn’t help myself. I saw that his room was a mirror image of mine. His bed and mine shared the same paper-thin wall. His bed was messy and full of big, puffy white blankets and pillows. I felt a pang of jealously when I imagined this gorgeous girl tangled up in the blankets with him all night long. Then I spied Ari, sound asleep in his chair, his feet propped up on the ottoman and his long legs stretched out in front of him. He was wearing the same clothes he had had on the night before. I let out a sigh of relief, then immediately felt stupid and presumptuous for even caring.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” I said to the girl. “I was just on my way to get some coffee.”
“Coffee sounds great,” she replied as if I were inviting her to come with me.
We padded down the hall to the kitchen and she took a seat at one of the little tables while I made a pot of coffee. I placed a steaming mug in front of her, put another down across from the first for myself and then sat.
“I’m Julia,” she said sweetly.
“Ava,” I said introducing myself.
“Yeah, I know,” she smiled, “Rory has told me about you.”
“All good, I hope,” I said in a lame attempt of keeping up small talk.
“Yes, of course, all good,” Julia laughed, even though my comment truly had not been at all funny. I felt grouchy, but then realized Julia had had nothing to do with my present mood. I tried harder to join her in conversation.
“Do you live here in the dorms?”
She shook her head, “I used to. I actually used to live in your room. I moved out last spring.”
Oh, that Julia, I thought. I remembered that Emily had mentioned her.
“I just came up here last night for the party.”
“Oh, I didn’t see you,” I lied. I shouldn’t have lied. Why did I lie? What difference did it make if I had seen her or not?
“Well, that’s because I was holed up in Ari’s room.”
Ugh, please don’t give me any details.
“He’s my ex-boyfriend. I was trying to win him back last night I guess.”
“Did it work?” I asked in a friendly tone, but deep down inside I was really hoping she had not succeeded.
“No,” she answered sadly. “He kept trying to drive me home last night and I kept talking about us. Finally he told me point blank that there is no “us” anymore. He said there’s nothing I can do bring us back together.” Julia’s voice broke a little as she repeated Ari’s words. I felt sorry for her. I’m sure the conversation must have hurt.
“I’m sorry. If it makes you feel better, my boyfriend broke up with me the day before I moved here.”
Julia smiled up at me. “Guys are such bastards.”
“Yes, they can be.” I agreed, thinking back to Michael. The day before I moved to California he called me outside of my apartment and told me that he didn’t have the energy to “do a long distance thing with me.” Michael and I dated for three years. He broke up with me three days after my mom died. He had no regard for my feelings or my emotions. Michael was indeed a complete bastard.
Julia and I finished our coffee and I got up to go back to my room.
“It was nice meeting you, Julia.” I meant it. But I hated the fact that she was so nice.
“It was nice meeting you, too, Ava. I am sure I’ll see you around campus.”
I walked back to my room just as Ari’s door opened again. He stepped out and looked groggy. He was wearing a pair of black-rimmed glasses that somehow only made him look even hotter. His hair was sticking out in tufts in an adorable sort of way that made me want to run my fingers through it. He gave me a smile as if he were happy to see me. I smiled back and then quickly walked into my room and shut the door before he could speak.
Emily, Vi, Sophie and I all piled in to my new car. I had driven it only one other time so it was still spotless and had that new car smell. Even though I didn’t have a car back home, my mom still had made me get a driver’s license. She made me practice with her Porsche and I was white knuckled and terrified the whole time. But in my car I felt really, really comfortable.
We made the drive to L.A. and I listened as the others discussed Julia and Ari in detail. Everybody made guesses about what might have happened between the two of them the night before. The speculation went on for a good half an hour. I knew, of course, what had happened, but I didn’t join in. Gossip has never been my thing.
We arrived at baio, Margaux’s store, about an hour later. She had been waiting for us and I could tell her staff was on edge. She rarely made an appearance at any of the retail shops and I am sure all of the people working that day were cursing my name. Someone was bound to get fired. Margaux loves to make scenes.
Margaux had her staff show off all of the newest clothes and we tried on whatever we wanted. Margaux had box after box filled and carried out to the car. She made her own choices about what we should have...but nobody other than myself seemed to notice. Then she insisted on taking us all to lunch. Emily, V
i and Sophie had an awesome time and adored Margaux just as Mia always has. I did not see the draw in an evil woman who floated around on stilettos all day.
After the shopping and the lunch, we headed back to Dana Point, hitting campus in late afternoon. Loaded down with boxes and bags, we waited in the lobby for the elevator, when the doors slid open, out stepped Ari. He said hello to us all with his bright, beautiful smile and I attempted to look pre-occupied with our items. Emily, Viola, Sophie and I hopped on the elevator. They called out their own friendly hellos. I kept my eyes on the ground and didn’t look up until I knew the doors were closed together tightly.
I opened the door to my dorm and shoved all the boxes in the bottom of my closet, then flopped down on my bed. After spending the day with my grandmother in high gear and a car full of gossiping girls, the quiet was abnormally welcoming. Twelfth floor was silent. Most of the people had gone home for the weekend, and I suspected Ari was heading home too. I was officially alone.
Chapter 5
Little Talks
I dedicated my Friday night to personal research. I began by looking up dream patterns that matched my own and quickly came up empty handed. I found absolutely nothing that fit the descriptions I entered. I even Googled Maya Xenos; she was nowhere to be found. I then moved on to researching my father, something that I had been putting off since the moment I heard his name mentioned at Providence. Don’t get me wrong. I wanted to know, I wanted desperately to know anything I could about him. But there was also part of me that was terrified. Why had my mom kept his life a secret from me? And why had she gone to such great lengths to hide his name in all the legal documents? There had to be something about him that someone did not want me to know. I opened my Google search engine and typed in Adrian Moirai. The first entry was an L.A. Times story from seventeen years ago.