Batteries Not Included

by Tony McFadden

  Nick gently pushed it back at Sam. “This machine is at least five times more powerful than the Dvorak machine you gave me. Eight times the memory, and the screen is a couple of centimetres larger. I need you to set up the VPN license, the security certificates I need and the applications I need to complete the work I’m doing.”

  Sam let her breath out slowly. “We don’t have a BYOD program here. I’m afraid that’s a very non-standard request” She pushed the laptop back toward Nick. “Sorry, no can do.”

  He firmly pushed it back. “Call Kirra.”

  Sam held onto the laptop for a second, then placed it on her desk. “Yeah, I’m not going to win that one.” She opened the lid and stopped at the login screen. Slid a pad of post-it notes and a pencil toward Nick. “Password, please. And come back in half an hour. This is going to take some time.”

  Nick scribbled it on the pad and slid it back. “The last two letter Os are zeros.” He checked the time. “Thanks. I appreciate you getting this done today. I’ll be in the kitchen grabbing a coffee,” he held up his phone, “and catching up on Twitter.”

  “I’m leaving in thirty minutes. If you’re not here to pick up your machine I’m locking it in my bottom drawer and you’ll have to wait until tomorrow.”

  “Yeah, yeah. Understood.”

  * * *

  Sam waited until Mac left and squinted at the password on the Post-It note. Typed in the password and unlocked the laptop. “Virgin. Huh.” She looked over her shoulder. She was once again on her own. “Okay then.”

  * * *

  Nick poured a cup of coffee and took it to a seat near the window. They were on the tenth floor. The view overlooked a pedestrian mall. A busker had collected a crowd listening to his guitar stylings. Nick wished he could hear it. Some of the best musicians in Australia worked on the streets, independently producing music that should be getting drive-time exposure.

  He set a timer in his phone for twenty minutes. He wasn’t going home without the laptop.

  Twitter was filled with the usual political tripe, TikTok dances and writers trying to flog their wares. He closed the app and sat back in the chair. Fifteen minutes to go.

  Slokow slid in across from him. “Any luck?”

  “With?”

  He shook his head. “Finding out where the money is going. And how much.”

  Nick narrowed his eyes. “Still a work in progress, I’m afraid.”

  “You suspect me.” It wasn’t a question.

  Nick grimaced. “I suspect everyone. Sorry, it’s not personal. I should be finished in a few days.”

  Slokow took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Debrief me when you find out what’s going on, okay? It’s not me. I don’t expect you to believe me, but if you’re even half as good at your job as you think you are you’ll discover that shortly.” He smiled. “I really hope you’re at least half as good as you think you are.”

  * * *

  Nick returned to the house with his newly updated laptop under his arm. It was just after 7:00 in the evening. He dropped it off in his bedroom and tracked down Davie at the pool. He was paddling on the deep end and hung off the wall when he saw his friend.

  “Food and drinks, mate. My treat,” said Nick. “Get dried off.”

  “I feel like a steak.”

  They ran into Mike in the kitchen.

  “How’s the head?”

  Nick had his hand halfway to his head and stopped before he touched it. “It’ll be okay.”

  Mike grunted assent. “If you want anything other than a sandwich you’ll have to cook it yourself.”

  Davie opened both doors of the double fridge. “When Kirra says she doesn’t eat beef, does that mean nobody gets to eat beef?”

  Mike pushed Davie out of the way. “Either of you know how to cook steak properly?” He took three sirloin tips out of the chiller. “Well?”

  “It’s a steak. Hard to ruin.”

  “She’s hired you to solve some kind of financial mystery? And you’re this dumb?” He turned on a cast iron grill and slapped the three steaks on a cutting board. “Watch and learn, kids.”

  “We’re the same age, arsehole.

  He glanced at Nick and shook his head. Mike ground rock salt and peppercorn on the steaks, flipped them over and repeated. Rubbed the salt and pepper into the meat. Dropped a couple of pats of butter on the grill and dropped the steaks on top.

  “We’re having asparagus with it.”

  “But I don’t - ”

  “Shut up. We’re having asparagus.” He grabbed a fistful of asparagus spears from the fridge and tossed them on the grill, using a spoon to wash them with the melted butter and juice from the steaks. Tossed some crushed garlic and thyme in the mix.

  “Medium rare, right?”

  Davie opened his mouth to argue, then nodded. “Right.”

  He flipped the steaks over. “Someone get cold beer from the fridge.” He arrayed three plates on the counter and served up steak and asparagus spears for the three of them. He placed them at the chef’s table in the kitchen and sat. “Well. What are you waiting for?”

  Mike waited until they had their first mouthful of beer before asking, “How long are you guys going to be here?”

  “Another week or so. You’ve known Kirra a long time?” Nick speared some asparagus and took a bite. “Not bad.”

  “Andy longer. Went to Uni with him. I had recently emigrated from Ireland. Tired of the pissy weather.”

  Davie looked at Nick and smiled. “Uni? What did you study to become a security guard?”

  “I studied business, you fat fuck. I’d just gotten out of the SAS. I wanted to run a security business. A very successful one.”

  “Okay. Relax. The asparagus is better than I thought it would be.”

  Mike grunted. “Find out what’s going on, okay? It really pisses me off that this happened. Someone get more beer.”

  17

  Nick cracked one eye open and winced against the bright morning sun. “Damn.” He dragged the word out like it was being pulled slowly from his chest. He put his hand on his head and took a sharp breath. The memories slowly seeped past the pain.

  He slowly swung his feet to the floor and looked around the bedroom. The pain in his head was a combination of hangover and the large lump on his head served up the night before.

  He stumbled into the shower and stood under the pounding hot spray until he began to feel a little more alive. “I need coffee.”

  “You and me both, mate.”

  He whipped his head around to see who spoke and immediately regretted it. “Jesus, Davie. What are you doing in here?” He pressed the palm of his hand against his forehead,

  “I can’t see your bits through the steam. Relax.”

  “I need some Grade A painkillers. Think you can scare some up while I shave?”

  “Sure, mate.”

  “And that coffee. Please.”

  Davie chuckled as he left the room.

  Nick turned off the shower and dried himself, taking care around his head. He rubbed his hand over the stubble on his scalp. He really should shave it, but the thought of navigating a razor around the injury on his scalp was too much.

  He wrapped a towel around his waist and checked what clean clothes he still had. Limited choice. He pulled on a pair of cargo shorts and a Chewbacca t-shirt and made his way to the pool. The sun was unbearably bright. He squinted as he moved the chair out of the sun and sat.

  He leaned back and closed his eyes and had drifted to a state of half sleep when the smell of coffee — really good coffee — wafted past his olfactory receptors.

  “Unngh.” He sat up and opened his eyes. A large mug of black coffee sat beside a small saucer holding two pills and a bottle of water covered with condensation. He looked around, squinting, until he found Davie. “What are these?”

  “Heavy duty ibuprofen, no codeine.” He scraped out his chair and smiled at Nick’s wincing. “Sorry.”

  Nick grunted and popped
the pills. Tipped back half the bottle of water.. “I’m more pissed off this morning than I was last night. First thing’s first — I need a new head.”

  “And second thing?”

  “Tell me that the key logger you have is completely unobtrusive.”

  “The key logger I have is completely unobtrusive.” He smiled. “Shouldn’t you have asked me that before we put it on Kirra’s machine?

  Nick nodded. “Slokow is more tech savvy.” He took a sip of coffee and smiled. “It’s good.” He took a deeper draught. “Okay. We need to get into Slokow’s personal laptop.”

  Davie stared at Nick for a full minute. “Nick, mate, you’re proposing we step across the line here. Company machines legit fall under your investigation. His personal machine doesn’t.”

  “If he’s doing something sneaky, it’s not on the work machine. Ergo, we need to get into the personal one. Or ‘ones’, if he has more than one.”

  “That’s breaking and entering. Serious time. And you’d lose your licence.”

  Nick contemplated that thought over another mouthful of coffee. “Then we don’t get caught. I’m bringing you into the office with me this morning.”

  “Jesus,” he groaned. “I’m going to have to shave, aren’t I?”

  “Did I tell you he found me at the office yesterday and insisted he was not the person we’re looking for?”

  “Suss. First on the list. But I’m already into his machine. You think he keeps his personal laptop at work? That doesn’t make sense.”

  “We need to find out where he lives.”

  “Right. Bills or something in his office.”

  * * *

  Nick knocked on the doorframe of Sam’s office. “Hey, can I bug you a minute?”

  She visibly sighed and closed the screen she was working on and turned her chair. “Sure. Who’s this?”

  Nick looked at a recently shaved Davie then back at Sam. “Dave Sangster, this is Sam. She’s the IT guru around here. Davie’s helping me out.”

  “Where’s his visitor’s pass? It needs to be displayed at all times and he needs to have an escort.”

  “We didn’t stop by the front desk. We’re just in here for a couple of minutes. I’m escorting him.”

  “Jesus.” She stood and pushed her chair back. Grabbed Davie by the arm. “A visitor can’t escort another visitor. You need to leave until you’ve got the appropriate pass.”.

  He pulled his arm free. “Relax. We’ll go get one now.”

  “I’ll be here whenever you get back.”

  Davie followed Nick to the lift lobby. “She’s a bit off.”

  “Yeah, that was my bad. I should have known better.” The doors opened on reception’s floor. The three cars were still there.

  “These are nice,” said Davie. “Very, very nice.”

  “No time. We’ve got things to do.” Nick leaned on the front desk. “Remember me?”

  “Kirra’s pet. What can I do for you? Your pass not working?”

  “No, it’s fine.” He pulled Davie closer. “David Sangster. He works for me and needs the same access Kirra gave me.”

  “Well, I can arrange floor access, but IT access will need to be handled by—“

  “—by Sam. I know. We were just there. I let Davie tailgate me in and she almost ripped my head off.”

  The receptionist laughed. “I don’t see any bruises. You got off easy.” She held out her hand. “Your driver’s licence, Mr Sangster?”

  He handed it over, then turned his back on the counter and admired the cars. “I could enjoy driving again, with one of these.”

  “You can’t afford it, mate.” Nick collected the credentials from the receptionist and thanked her. He tapped Davie on the arm. “Keep these around your neck or you’ll end up getting head butted by Sam.”

  “Thanks.” He grabbed them and put them on. He turned and smiled at the receptionist. “My licence?”

  She handed it back, and placed the palm reader on the counter. “Place your hand here until the flashing red light turns green.”

  He looked at Nick who nodded. “Okay.”

  The light turned green and the receptionist retrieved the tablet. “Good to go.”

  “Thanks.” He fell in beside Nick. “What now?”

  “Down three flights to level 10 and start over. Be nice to Sam, okay? She’s an old friend and can help us a lot.” He started down the stairs. “But don’t tell her what we’re up to. I’m pretty sure we’re going to cross the line of legality.”

  “Way across the line.” Davie looked at the two separate cards on the lanyard. “Why two?”

  “The white one with the big red ‘V’ on it gets you in every floor except Level 16, the secure floor. The black one gets you on to 16.”

  They walked down two flights before Davie talked again. “How we going to do this?”

  “Get Sam used to seeing you around. You become a fixture. Need to accelerate that, so we’ll bug her about printer location, stationary, a bunch of shit she doesn’t really handle.”

  “Annoying? I can be annoying.”

  “I know. Crank it up. Then I’ll get Slokow out of his office and maybe his personal laptop is in there and you spike it. If it’s not, we’ll need to get his home address and do it there.”

  “I really hope it’s in his office. I’m not cool about breaking into his house. That’s a felony.”

  Nick smiled. “You’re too uptight. One problem at a time.”

  They reached Level 10 and Nick got Davie to use his pass to get in the door. “Making sure it works.”

  It did.

  Sam met them at the door and inspected the credentials. “Okay. Why are you here?”

  “We just popped by here to reassure you that Davie was set up properly. We’ll be heading up to 16 to gather financials. Would you know if Slokow is in today?”

  “He was earlier.”

  “We’ll catch you later then.”

  * * *

  They’d wandered around the 16th floor for almost an hour before Nick slowed by the copy machine. “Slokow’s office is in that corner. I’ll draw him out on some pretext and you check the place out. You’re going to need a story if someone catches you.”

  “I’ll think of something.”

  “Okay. Hang here until you see me pass. You’ll have about five minutes.”

  Nick knocked on Slokow’s door frame. “Hey, can I grab you for minute? I need some background.”

  Brent Slokow waved him in. “Grab a seat.”

  Nick grimaced. He glanced back at the copy room. “I was about to get a coffee. I’ll buy you one. It’s a bit stuffy in here, don’t you think?”

  Slokow looked at his laptop and then at his empty coffee cup and sighed. “Sure.” He locked his laptop and pushed himself away from his desk. “What specifically do you want to talk about?”

  Davie waited a couple of seconds after Nick and Slokow left. He grabbed the doorknob to the office and twisted.

  Or tried to. The door was locked.

  “Son of a bitch.” He rattled the knob, an exercise in futility. “Dammit. Nick has got to teach me how to pick these things.”

  A young woman approached him, casually checking out the ID cards on his lanyards. “Can I help you?”

  He finger-combed his hair. “I’m from, um, Dell. Mr Slokow had a repetitive BSOD error on his laptop and called our service centre. Actually your IT department called us after he called them and they couldn’t handle it. I need to update a driver so his SAP software can connect to the distributed printer server.” He looked at his watch. “We were scheduled for 10:30, which is now, but his door is locked. I’ve got a jam-packed schedule today. It only takes five minutes to load the driver,” he pulled a thumb drive from his pocket, “but if I can’t get in there in the next couple of minutes I’m going to have to bail to the next job. In Parramatta.”

  “So, he can’t print?”

  “Not from SAP. And his machine has slowed to a crawl. Look, you don’t h
ave the key, do you?” A set of keys hung off her lanyard.

  “I do. But I don’t know.”

  “You’re his EA?”

  She nodded.

  “Could you let him know that I was here? My next available spot is late next week.”

  She set her jaw. Furrowed her brow. An executive decision had to be made. She extended the keys and picked out the appropriate one and unlocked the door.

  “I really appreciate this. I’ll let him know you helped.”

  Her phone chimed with a message. “Absolutely.” She pointed at her phone. “I’ve got to answer this. Let me know when you’re finished and I’ll lock it back up. I’m in the next cube over.”

  Davie waited until she left then looked around the office. Opened a laptop bag leaning against the leg of Slokow’s desk to check for a personal machine.

  Nothing.

  He flipped through the correspondence on his desk until he found a personal letter addressed to Sally Slokow. “The wife.” He took a picture of the address on the envelope and left the office.

  He tapped on the EA’s desk. “Finished. Thanks for your help.”

  “Thanks for letting me know.” She reflexively held on to the keys hanging around her neck and made a path to her boss’s office.

  He thumbed a text to Nick. ‘Success. Need to go to his house now. I have his address. I’m by the copier.’

  18

  “Block the view a bit, mate.” Nick crouched with his pick set as Davie shuffled a bit to the left. They stood on the front step of an old, double-brick two storey house in Canada Bay. Shrubbery on either side of the steps blocked most of the view of the front door and Davie’s substantial bulk provided the rest of the cover.

  Nick glanced over his shoulder, then returned his focus to the deadbolt. After a couple of minutes, it slid open. “We’re in.”

  Davie followed him into the house, pulling the door shut behind him. “Nuts-o doing this in broad daylight, mate.”