by Clara Bayard
Rocked to the Core
By Clara Bayard
Kindle Edition
Copyright©2013 by Clara Bayard
All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
Chapter One
His hands fist in my hair, pulling my mouth down to his. The softness of his lips is a sharp contrast to the desperate hardness of the kiss. His tongue drives inside my mouth, tasting and searching deep.
I wrap my arms around his waist and splay my hands against his naked back, warm and slick with sweat. Inhaling his scent sent every nerve in my body humming and I spread my legs to get him closer to me. Closer to being inside me.
"Babe…" he murmurs against my lips.
I let my hands answer him, sliding up his back, over his strong shoulders. My nails scrape against his skin as he reaches between us. The calloused pads of his fingers dance down the swell of my belly, familiar and soothing. It seems like a million years ago that I feared his touch there, shrank away from it.
But now, every inch of me is known by him, adored by him. There is nothing sexier and I purr, adjusting my position to grant him access to my most private of places.
He slides a fingertip over my crease, his breath catching slightly as he fells the moisture there, how ready I am for him. But instead of pushing inside, he retreats. A soft kiss on my mouth and then his head dips, tongue sliding over my skin.
In the soft light of the room I watch him, my bronzed god, lean and strong.
A trail of heat follows his journey down to my chest. One of his hands circles my hip as the other lifts a breast to his lips. He sucks the tight peak in, coaxing a shudder of pleasure from me with his talented tongue and teeth. With the perfect amount of pressure he tortures me delightfully, making my heart thunder under the soft fullness of my breast.
I moan and cling tighter to him. "Please, Joe…"
He chuckles. "Relax, babe. We have all the time in the world."
"Oh, right." I'd forgotten. Calmed by his words I pull him down onto our sides, legs tangled together, bodies entwined the way we should always be.
Joe's mouth works its way back up to my neck as his fingers keep teasing my nipples. He laughs again and I am startled.
"What's so funny?"
His breath is hot against my throat when he speaks. "I can hear every tiny sound you make here. When I pinch, or tug." He punctuated each example with the corresponding action. "Different little noises for each. Like you're an instrument I play."
I smile and run a hand up over his stubbled cheek and to his spiky hair. "You're quite adept at playing this instrument, Mr. Hawk."
He sucks at my neck where my pulse is pounding. "It is my favorite."
"Mmm. Let's see what other tunes it can play."
Joe skims his hands down my sides and turns us so he is on top of me. He braces on one arm and stares down into my face as I shake my head to push a lock of hair from my face, unwilling to take my hands off of him for even a second.
He hooks one of my legs over his and presses against me. His hard length is silken fire between my thighs and I sigh.
He freezes at the sound. "What?"
"I'm just happy. This is where we belong."
The heat of his skin dissipates quickly and turns icy. Where pleasure had warmed me I start to shiver from the loss of it.
Joe's face grows cold too, his bright blue eyes gone steely. "Then why did you leave me?"
"I didn't. I'm right here."
The hotel window slams open and a chilly wind whips through the room. I look over and see trees outside straining against the gale but when I turn back he's gone. The bed is empty and I'm so cold and so alone.
"Joe," I scream, but my voice is tiny and lost in the roar of the weather outside. "No!"
~*~
I sat up with a start, the cry still echoing in my head. Alone, but not in a cold hotel. I'm at home in my own bed, but that fact did nothing to comfort me. I curled my legs up and hugged them to my chest, letting my head sink to my knees.
My heart was pounding and I cursed silently. I'd thought the dreams were gone. It had been weeks since the last one. But every time I believe things were getting better my brain betrayed me and dragged me back down.
All that saved me from another lengthy session of wallowing in misery was the alarm on my phone going off. My head cleared a little and I remembered why I'd set it so early.
I climbed out of bed and swayed on my feet for a moment. Warring sensations filled my body and made me dizzy. Arousal clung to me from the dream, the memory of Joe's hands on me. But the anguish of missing him shot through it like a dagger.
"Shake it off," I ordered myself, bumping into the bed and then the door frame as I lumbered into the bathroom like a drunk bear.
The shower helped drown out the thoughts screaming in my head and I remembered I was supposed to be happy. It was a big day and I'd been looking forward to it for months.
I got dressed and ate breakfast and was finally starting to get excited when my phone rang. For a second I couldn't breathe until I saw it was Kelly.
"Hey," I said. "What are you doing up so early?"
"I'm not," she replied blearily. "Just going to bed. We still on for this afternoon?"
"Of course. You sound terrible, friend. Want me to call you when I leave work to make sure you're up?"
"Yes, please. I'm skipping my morning class."
I tried not to laugh. She sounded half asleep already. "I'll expect details when I see you later."
"Uh huh. Love ya. Bye."
"Bye."
I hung up and scrounged around for my keys.
The brief walk to work was uneventful. The weather was strangely mild for January and tons of people were strolling around like they had nowhere to go. I was still adjusting to working the day shift at the diner and being around so many people at once.
I opened the door and the familiar smell of fried everything assaulted me. I pushed my way through the line of hungry customers waiting for tables or a spot at the counter and made my way to the back.
The din of the full restaurant still unsettled me as I shoved my purse in my locker and grabbed my apron. While I was happy for the owner, the new popularity of the place kind of bummed me out in a weird way. I missed the quiet nights of just me and Darrell, with maybe one customer nursing coffee for hours while we listened to the crappy radio and chatted about nothing.
I glanced at myself in the mirror, clocked in, and went out through the kitchen.
"Good morning," I called out to the two cooks. They waved spatulas and went right back to work.
I was grabbing my order pad when Sarah, the diner's manager, appeared in front of me.
"Oh, how nice of you to join us, Melissa."
I smiled widely. "Good morning to you too. And for the record, I'm exactly on time."
"Yes," she sniffed. "I suppose doing the bare minimum is sufficient for you."
Refusing to take the bait, I waved the other waitress on duty over to get an update on everything. Nothing was ever good enough for Sarah and I'd long since given up trying to please her. It didn't make any sense that her father owned the place but she was the hard-ass about everything. Life's too short to stress out that much, and I wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of getting as irritated as she always was.
One nice thing a
bout busy days at the diner was Sarah couldn't catch me long enough to pick on me. Id' thought things might improve when I came back, but they were worse. And even when the diner got a great mention from the lead singer of a famous rock band in no small part due to me, and the crowds returned, she still treated me like a lazy bum, no matter how hard I worked. She made some noises about disloyalty because of the weeks I'd taken off to tour with Joe's band, but I knew it was just an excuse to continue to be a mega bitch.
I sighed again, missing my nights with Darrell. But switching shifts had freed me up for something important and I had to keep reminding myself it was worth it. Or, I hoped it would be.
The morning passed quickly and before I knew it the smell of burgers was wafting from the kitchen and it was time for me to go. Shocked at how fast the six hours had gone by, I closed out and headed home to get in my car.
An hour later I pulled into the parking lot, thanked god that my piece of crap vehicle had managed to make it that few miles, checked my hair and gathered my things. Only one of my legs was out of the car before a tall skinny body came flying at me.
"Liss! Finally."
I laughed and pushed her off me so I could finish getting out of the car. "Kelly, please. Stop acting like you've been waiting for me all day. I just talked to you, remember? You were fast asleep."
"Shut up." She grinned broadly, wrapped an arm around my waist and led me out of the visitor's lot.
Around us the campus was bustling. Everywhere I looked there were groups of bright faced young people enjoying the strange weather in clumps grouped outside of buildings and along the walkways.
"This is a great day for you to be coming to class. I bet half the people will cut since it's so warm."
"Can't blame them."
"Yeah. Honestly, if you weren't here I'd probably do the same. My hangover could use a nap in the sun."
I glared at her with mock disapproval. "Shame on you."
"Yeah, yeah yeah." She tugged me down towards a low, squared-off building. "Come on."
As we passed people some waved and almost everyone smiled. It was neat. They couldn't tell this was my first college class, or that I was just auditing it. From the outside I looked like any other student on campus, strolling to class with a friend.
Six months ago I never would have thought I'd end up here. But after everything I went through with Joe, and coming home, I'd finally found something new to get excited about.
We climbed the steps and I stopped in front of the door to look at my friend. "Kel, thanks for doing this for me."
She shrugged. "Hey, I benefit too. I get to spend more time with you. Besides, I'd do anything to see you happy again."
"I know. And I'm getting there."
"Good. You finished the reading I gave you, right?"
"Yup." I blushed and ducked my head. "I read everything twice."
Kelly giggled. "Oh boy. Teacher's pet already."
"Shut up. I paid a month's worth of tips to do this. I want to make sure I'm getting as much as possible out of it."
"And it helped fill some lonely nights?"
I sighed. "That too."
"Oh no, I'm sorry. Don't start moping, we'll be late."
I shook my head and laughed. We walked into the building and down the hallway. The classroom was nothing like I expected. I'd been imagining a huge lecture hall full of bored looking students, but the room was small, dotted with desks, tables and a few chairs in no discernible pattern. I was relieved there wouldn't be a huge crown, but nervous that I wouldn't be able to hide.
There was no podium or obvious professor, either. Kelly pulled me over to an empty table and dropped her stuff on top of it. I sank down into the chair next to her as she pulled out her laptop and a notebook.
I looked around the room, watching everyone settle in and get comfortable. Finally a guy in his early thirties stood up and waited for the room to quiet down.
"Hi everyone," he said, leaning against the back of a chair. He was in jeans, a cable knit sweater and a pair of ratty sneakers. This was a teacher?
"I see we have a new member of the class. Melissa, right?"
I nodded and then looked down at my lap, wishing all twenty sets of eyes in the room weren't on me.
"Well Melissa, welcome to the Citizen and Community Journalism seminar. I'm Professor Shaw, but everyone calls me Doug. We're gonna dive in, but stop me if you need anything clarified, okay?"
"Sure. Um, thanks."
"No problem." He smiled kindly at me and then broadened his attention to the rest of the class. "Now, who wants to start us off for the day?"
No hands went up but voices rang out, tumbling over each other. I was terrified for a moment but Kelly squeezed my knee under the table and I relaxed a little. Pretty soon I was swept away, caught up in the frenzied cross-talking and even joining in with some of my own thoughts. It was only my first day and one small class, but so far college was even better than I'd dreamed. Of course, the last time I was in a classroom it was in our local low-ranked high school, so the bar was set pretty low. Still, the whole experience was invigorating.
Chapter Two
After class Kelly led me to a lounge on the second floor, comfy chairs and low tables facing the wide window that overlooked the campus.
"So, what do you think, Liss?"
"It was fun. And really interesting. I got lost a few times but managed to keep up."
She smiled. "You did great. Coming back next week?"
"Absolutely. You know, I was really scared to show up. I thought you were nuts when you asked me."
"Why?"
"Because it’s a really advanced class. When I had the idea of finding something to audit I was thinking more along the lines of giant lecture with freshmen who'd be almost as clueless as me."
Kelly rolled her eyes and slapped my arm lightly. "Well I know you better than you know yourself, friend. I knew you could do this."
"Don't get too proud, it was only one session."
"Whatever. You're smart enough to do anything you want. I've always known that."
"Thank you."
"You're welcome. Now, enough about school. How are you doing?"
I tucked my legs under me and looked out the window. "Fine. I had another dream last night. Which sucked. But I'm okay."
"I almost believe you. Now, tell me…" She paused and waved at someone behind me. "Hey!"
I turned and saw a guy walking towards us. He was cute, medium height with sandy hair and a really sweet smile. "Hi Kelly."
"I'm so glad I saw you. Come meet Liss."
He slid between two chairs and hiked his bag up on his shoulder, then stuck his hand out for me to shake. "Hello."
I froze for a moment, unsure if he was joking. But his hand stayed there so I shook it lightly. "Hi. Nice to meet you…"
"Zach. I'm really glad to meet you too. Kelly can't stop talking about you."
I eyed her suspiciously and then smiled. "It's all lies. I promise."
"I certainly hope that's not the case," he said, still holding my hand.
The moment grew and grew and I finally yanked my hand away, which made it even more awkward. "Um, want to sit down?"
Zach nodded. "Sure, thanks." He slumped down into the chair next to me and crossed his legs at the ankle. "Ready for tomorrow, Kelly?"
"God, no. I'm pretending it isn't happening."
They chatted about their shared business class for a while and I zoned out, trying to subtly look Zach over. Kelly had mentioned him a few times and I couldn't tell if she was interested in him or not. He wasn't really her type, but they seemed to get along well. Even in high school Kelly had always been drawn to sporty guys. Zach looked like he was in good shape, but more studious than jocky.
He wore faded jeans and a sweatshirt like most of the guys I'd seen on campus, but as I continued my scan of his body I noticed he was only wearing one sock and stifled a giggle. There was something endearing about it and I looked at his face again. H
e was constantly shoving his fingers through his slightly too-long hair, trying to smooth it but only succeeding in making it messier.
I thought for a moment and decided he'd be good for Kelly. She deserved someone sweet and kind. And local. I sighed and then frowned, annoyed with myself. I was having a good day; it wasn't the time to be thinking about what I'd lost.
"Sounds good to me. Liss, what do you think? You're not working Saturday, are you?"
"Um… what?"
Kelly laughed. "Movie and pizza night?"
"Oh. When?"
"Earth to Melissa! Saturday. You can crash with me; my roommate is going home to visit her parents for the weekend."
"Oh, sure. Sounds like fun."
"Great. Zach, I'm gonna walk Liss back to her car and I'll talk to you later. Call me about the history thing if you can't find your notes."
"Will do."
We all stood up and as I was turning to pick up my bag Zach touched my arm. "It was wonderful to meet you. Saturday will be great."
"Uh huh." For a moment I thought I saw something in his eyes, but I shrugged it off. Not every guy who was nice was flirting. Not that it would have mattered. Romance was the last thing on my mind.
We said our goodbyes and headed out.
"Zach seems nice," I said on the path to the parking lot.
"He is. We have three classes together this semester and it's great to have someone to share notes and ideas off of."
I linked arms with Kelly and arched an eyebrow. "Is that all you're sharing with him?"
She laughed. "Please. He's so not my type. Besides, he spent the last few minutes staring at you."
"He was not."
"Sure was. And he's a nice guy but never that polite and attentive with me. I think you've got a new admirer."
"That's the last thing I need, Kel."
We got to my car and she leaned against the door. "I disagree. Maybe a new crush is just what you need to help get a certain rock star out of your mind."
"Let's not go there, okay?"
Suddenly serious, she grabbed my hand and squeezed it. "Liss, come on. I hate seeing you so sad. If this is really what you want, to be away from Joe, why are you still so miserable?"