by Lane, Lolita
“There we go. Leave it to you to use your smarts to figure that out. Everything will be fine.”
Even as he tried to comfort me, there was a hollowness to his words. Like he didn’t believe it. Like I didn’t believe it. Like we both were just saying feel-good platitudes that we knew weren’t true.
11
The next day was so unbelievably weird for me. We parted amicably. Enrique volunteered to drive me to the airport. I accepted, just wanting to be with him for a bit longer.
Even as he picked me up from my motel though, we were cold to one another. The drive to the airport was virtually silent outside the rumbling of the car. We barely even looked at one another. What I thought would be a way to say goodbye was just an agonizing experience. I checked into the flight. He even carried my bags in for me.
Enrique watched as I walked through the terminal, about to head to the plane as my flight was called. I could feel his eyes on me as I walked out of his sight.
I managed to make it to my seat before I burst into tears.
*
It should have been a beautiful ceremony. It probably was, honestly.
All through the day, I put on my happiest face for Mia. There were lots of photos, and I was the maid of honor, so I was present in most of them. Expressing my heartbreak and going off and crying into some cake somewhere wasn’t how I wanted my sister to remember this day.
She walked down the aisle. She said I do. He did the same. She had a ring. The band hit the music. People danced around happily.
I saw it as an opportunity to get away. At least for a bit, I reasoned.
Then I used my moment to get away to run to the bathroom and tossed up some cake into the toilet, gingerly trying not to get any on my dress. It was a nice dress, and vomit would clash with it.
I really didn’t like the nauseous feeling I kept having. I also didn’t like that my period hadn’t come yet. Sure, it had been a few days late before, but I’ve never been super reckless when faced with those delays before.
Briefly, I recalled my grandmother talking about how she was looking forward to grandchildren soon from Christopher and Mia’s wedding. She kept going on about how women in the our family could get pregnant off a toilet seat if a man was anywhere near it beforehand. It was kind of disgusting to think about, but her metaphor was clear. Our genes were predisposed to being more fertile, pushing the odds of getting knocked up a little higher than usual. It was why I was so religious when it came to taking the pill. Except for that fateful day in Valencia, I had never missed one, not even when I had that infection and needed to take antibiotics.
I hated the direction my thoughts were taking. I found my way over to a bench, passing by people who had excused themselves from the festivities for a smoke break.
The last thing I needed was a constant reminder of what I had left behind. It was terrifying to me that I had mentally romanticized it so much.
“Out here where all the smokers hide, huh?” a familiar voice said. “I didn’t know you took up smoking.”
“Death from lung cancer seems pretty appealing at the moment.”
Mia sat down next to me. “Why are you running from my wedding?” she asked.
She was in her fancy dress, in all of its impractical white glory. I looked away from her. “Don’t bother yourself with me, Mia, go enjoy your big day.”
“Well, I want to, but my little sister is out here moping around. That’s not a good day for me. I want you in there and partying with the rest of us, Leah, especially after all the hard work you put into planning this with me.”
“I’m just having a bad day is all. They happen sometimes.”
“Yeah, but your bad day is just one in a series of bad days since you came back from your trip. Something is eating at you. Spit it out.”
Stupid sister and the fact that she knew me so well. “I contemplated not showing up to your wedding, you know.”
“Really? After everything you told me, after all the planning you helped me do? After you pinky swore on it?”
“Hey, I didn’t no show, did I? Besides, picking all that stuff is fun, and so is doing all the planning. Christopher’s a pretty swell guy, so I wanted it to be perfect for you two,” I said.
“What is it, then? Is little sister jealous of big sister’s new husband?” Mia raised an eyebrow and put her hand on my shoulder.
“A little bit, I guess. You seem so happy with him.”
“I am, but don’t you dare be jealous of me. You’ll find someone who makes you crazy about them too. Make you think of doing dumb things, make you do some dumb things. Trust me, Leah, it happens to all of us.”
A deep breath. I hadn’t mentioned Enrique to anyone. Not to Mia, my parents, not even to my dog. Part of me was incredibly embarrassed that I fell for a guy so quickly. I was a smart, modern woman. I shouldn’t have let my emotions get the better of me, and if I couldn’t actually be that, I wanted to at least pretend I was. “Sure, it’ll come. Probably not as fast as yours. Married at twenty-four to a great guy. I have to be jealous, Mia.”
“Hey, as much as I think it’ll work out, it might not,” she shrugged. “Don’t you dare even think of telling him this, but I haven’t ruled out the possibility that I might be making a mistake.”
I looked at her with surprise. “I’ve seen the way you look at Christopher – and the way he looks at you. That’s something special.”
“We’ll probably be fine. But I can’t rule it out. I can’t be blind. We all make mistakes.”
“Why are you marrying him then?”
“Because it feels right, Leah. The way he makes me feel, this is something that can last forever, that can last the trials of our lives. If it doesn’t? It’s a modern time. We can move on. For now though, I’m jumping on the chance to claim him as mine.”
I smiled at her, given that she seemed wiser than I was at the moment.
She stood up, holding her gown off the ground as she did so. “I need to get back to my party. I’d prefer if you came with me, but take your time if you need it. Heartbreak is never easy to recover from.”
I became silent as she walked away.
I hated when my family was able to read me without me saying a single word.
She also had a point. Why was I going to throw away something so special? Who knew how long it would be before I got another chance at something like that?
Damn my school plans. My education could wait. I was going back to Spain. I needed to tell him. I needed to confess to him that I wanted to try. I would figure everything else out later. I couldn’t just foolishly let Enrique go.
12
I reached into my clutch and pulled out my phone. As I skimmed my contact list, I realized I didn’t know if I had an international plan or not, but I decided I didn’t care. Money didn’t matter. I was calling him.
On our last day together, before I boarded the plane, Enrique and I exchanged numbers, knowing that we wanted that option, that connection.
It had been six weeks, but I hadn’t heard from him. It was sad, but I didn’t blame him. I couldn’t bring myself to reach out to him either. That was changing today.
I was going to tell him everything. I tapped his name and anxiously waited as his phone rang. I wondered what time it was in Spain and whether I would be waking him up in the middle of the night.
“Hola,” he said.
“Enrique,” I cried out. “Enrique, are you there?”
“Ah, Leah. I didn’t expect you to call me,” he said smoothly.
“Listen, I’m sorry I took off like that.”
“I know,” he said, sounding confused.
“I didn’t wake you up, did I?”
“No, no. I’ve been awake.”
“Is something the matter?” I asked.
I expected to call him and have a heartfelt confession of my feelings for him. Instead, I had no idea what was going on. He sounded strange over the phone.
“I really didn’t expect you to call me
, Leah.”
“Well, I am. I’m sorry. I need to talk to you. About everything. About us. About how we can make it work.”
“That’s wonderful, Leah, it really is. The thing is, I don’t want to talk about that over the phone.”
“I want to come back to Valencia to see you. I’ll arrange the soonest flight I can afford. I need to see you, Enrique.”
“All that really won’t be necessary, Leah. Calm down.”
There was a chill going down my spine. Maybe he had changed his mind and came to realize that I was nothing more than a fling. Maybe he had already moved on. After all, he was awake after midnight where he was. He could already be with another woman. He could already be lost to me. It broke my heart, and my voice faltered.
“I understand, you don’t want me to come. Sorry, I just got overexcited. You know how weddings are. They make you jealous.”
“Leah, really. I want to see you still. I just don’t need you to come here to do it.”
“Umm, you can’t come here though, right?”
“Actually, I can.” I turned around, because that time, his voice didn’t have that light static to it that phone calls usually had. This time, his voice was crystal clear.
13
He was here. Dressed to kill, in a black tuxedo with a black shirt and black bow tie. It was solid all the way through, but it really worked on him.
Then again, he could make anything work. Even nothing. Especially nothing.
Enrique was here. In the flesh. Really, really here. I reached out, touching his suit, trying to make sure he was a real person and not just me going delirious.
“Are you done poking me?”
“You’re here. You’re actually here.”
“Yes, I’m aware.”
“How? Why?”
Since stunning me with his presence wasn’t enough for him, he pulled me into a hug and kissed me. Deeply, powerfully. The adrenaline was pumping through my body, and I felt my need for him grow and spread through my body like wildfire. His fingers ran down my back, and his hand stroked my thigh. Everywhere he touched me only reminded me of the bliss he had delivered to me back across the Atlantic.
The kiss finally broke, but he kept me close. “I couldn’t let you go, Leah. I spent the first few days trying to get my mind off you, but you stuck around. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw your beautiful body. When I slept, I dreamed of being inside you. I even tried to find another woman, but I couldn’t even get her out of the bar before I realized it felt so much like betrayal.”
“Did you change your mind?” I went silent, fearing that I had a potential problem in front of me. “I thought you didn’t want to come over on a tourist visa?”
“I’m not here on a tourist visa. I filed an application for an extended stay at the US embassy in Madrid a few days after you left, and it took them a few weeks to process it. I knew I just had to be patient and that I would see you again soon.”
I had to break out into a laugh. “That’s proof of your dedication if I ever heard one. I mean, traveling halfway across the world, yeah, that’s impressive. But waiting weeks for a visa to be approved, when you couldn’t be bothered to do it before? My heart’s aflutter.”
“It was worth it to see you again.”
He lifted me off my feet and started to carry me away. “What?”
“Being this close to you is doing bad things to me. I have to have you now, Leah. I mean right this second.”
My eyebrows went up, but I wasn’t going to fight him. Especially not with the passion that had been ignited in me already. He found an out of the way table and sat me down on it. It was in a tunnel under a low stone bridge, giving us plenty of cover. He leaned in for another kiss. His hands just touching my bare flesh was a wonder all its own, and I couldn’t wait until I got to experience him fully.
Until I realized we weren’t all that far from my sister’s wedding. “Seriously, here? What if my mom hears me or something?”
“That’s on you. We’re out of sight enough. I need you, Leah, and I don’t think I can wait until your sister’s wedding reception is completely done with.”
“God, I can’t believe I’m willing to do this.” I must have been as horny as he was.
He pulled at my dress and pushed my breasts out of my bra, letting them escape freely. The fabric pulled at my flesh, but with Enrique’s touch and his lips locked around my nipple, pleasure far outweighed any pain. Feeling that surge shoot through me, it was so amazingly strong and was doing much to whet my appetite for him even more.
I kept peering around. We were out of sight of most of the party, but still, all it took was one person turning a corner or me moaning a bit too loudly, and suddenly I would have a whole lot of explaining to do.
Enrique was going to challenge me to keep quiet in the face of it all. It was reckless, it was stupid, but it was love. Love could make anyone do incredibly stupid things.
He was under my skirt, completely hidden from view. So not only was he going to make me moan, the person to catch me will think I’m completely insane too.
Before I could protest further, he touched me, reminding me of what I could enjoy for taking such a risk. His fingers danced over the fabric, tickling my clit, sending little shocks through me, little things that only built up into making me want him more.
I was looking left and right, and he kept teasing me, forcing me to open my mouth and let out a silent moan. I had to keep control of myself, no matter what he did. When he slid a finger past my panties and touched my slit flesh to flesh, it told me that I was in for quite a challenge.
“You’re drenched down here, Leah,” he said from underneath my dress. “Have you even touched yourself since we’ve last been together?”
“Being heartbroken doesn’t make you feel sexy,” I said. “Besides, I don’t think I could even call what I do to myself an orgasm after experiencing you.”
I heard his laugh. “I’ll take that as a compliment and let you experience me once again.”
He started to pull my panties down my legs, and I blushed at the aspect of going panty-free wearing a dress like this. I was the maid of honor, someone dignified and respectable, someone who the bride could trust fully. Not someone who was being fingered within earshot of the wedding and moaning like there was no tomorrow.
God, Enrique was challenging me to not be quiet. I bit my lip as he ran his fingers around my labia, and his thumb rubbed up against my now-naked clit. That same thumb pressed into me, teasing me with something thick, but not as thick as what was soon to come, knowing Enrique. He definitely wouldn’t be able to hide under my dress if he wanted to do that.
He fucked me with his thumb, then a pair of fingers. I was breathing heavily, fighting my natural instincts, wondering why nature encouraged women to be so naturally loud. Still though, there was something intense, something dangerous about all of this that was bringing it all to a whole new level. I could see what fueled exhibitionists, even though I absolutely hated the idea of being caught. Mia would never let me hear the end of it if she happened to stumble upon this scene.
Steadily, he was building that fire within me. I was wriggling in my seat, his hands holding me firmly in place so he could experience my sex so completely. He spread my pussy lips, and I could feel the heat of his breath infiltrating my body. His tongue slipped in, teasing me as he went. It was all I could do to hold myself together as the ecstasy inside me began to build higher and higher.
Somehow, I only let out a murmur at this point. I was breathing heavily and gripping the edge of the table tightly as he went to work on me. A lick here, a suck there, he was taking my relative silence as an absolute challenge. I didn’t want my family’s first exposure to Enrique to be like this, so I kept myself together, and he went even further.
His fingers slid in and out of me as he gently sucked my clit. Every suck that followed was harder, faster, and more driven. I kept resisting, patting his head through my dress, trying to distract him to b
uy myself some time. Still, the jolts shot through me, the waves getting too big to ignore. My voice escaped past my lips. “Ooh…” I moaned softly.
Sensing my resistance was waning, Enrique made his move. He applied hard, steady sucks to my clit as his fingers penetrated me right along with it. Why did he have to be so good at this? I heard my voice echoing off a stone wall, and I tried to nibble on my lips, trying to not let the orgasm overtake me so strongly.
He wasn’t going to stop until I came. This wasn’t him eating my pussy to get me even hornier for him. No, he was completely out to make me cum. He was doing a fantastic job of it. I was squirming, gritting my teeth, trying to bear everything that he was doing to me.
My grip on the table grew even tighter as I endured him, feeling the wave of bliss that came from every suck, how he was so expertly manipulating my pussy. It was growing tougher and tougher to resist him with every second that passed. Every muscle in my body was tense, and I was quickly approaching the point where I was ready to explode.
I heard myself panting, my moans getting louder as I rocked back and forth. I couldn’t stifle myself too much longer. To my surprise, his sucks were replaced by a furious fingering, making sure my poor clit wasn’t without love for very long. He shot up, appearing from under the dress, and was looking into my distressed eyes.
Was he just going to watch me make a complete fool of myself? I was so overwhelmed, and I just couldn’t resist anymore. I had to let go. I had to let the orgasm win.
It won. I didn’t scream as loud as I thought I would have though, as he helped me keep my silence by kissing me deeply as I broke.
I sang into his mouth, with him doing his damnedest to let me enjoy him to the fullest all the while keeping me quiet enough that our tryst wouldn’t be revealed.
Panting, my eyes were wide and just staring at him with amazement as our embrace broke. “You’re a mad man.”
He chuckled. “I think I love everything about you, Leah. The way you squirm, the way your eyes roll back a bit when you cum, the sound of your voice when you scream for me. It’s all so very beautiful. That’s why… that’s why…” He took in a deep breath.