by Ella Fields
That was before she was caught sleeping beside Mike O’Rourke, Callum’s once upon a time friend, and effectively ruined that perfect happily ever after. Oh yeah, Daisy told me all about it.
“So you’ll have to understand if I’m a little reluctant to allow you to ask any more.”
Renee’s gaze was sharp, measuring. Then she smiled, and I was almost blown backward into the seat in front of mine by the vibrancy of it. She leaned forward. “I can respect that. But honestly, I just need to know one thing.”
Sighing, I blew some hair from my face. “Spit it out then.”
Her laugh was airy. “Are they a thing? She and Callum?”
I didn’t want to tell this girl anything. Not after what she’d done to a guy who I thought was pretty decent. Despite Callum and Daisy only being friends, a part of me wished she could move on with him.
Renee’s eyes narrowed, and I recognized the barely veiled desperation lurking in them. She still loved the guy.
Fuckleberry. “Listen and listen carefully, and I’m only telling you this because you are not to start any funny crap with her.” I exhaled heavily. “She’s not interested in him … not like that.”
That appeased her enough to lean back in her seat. She glanced away a second before looking back. Obviously realizing I’d only said she’s not interested. But how the heck was I supposed to know that about Callum? He seemed interested in Daisy, sure. Yet I didn’t know the guy well enough to talk about his intentions, so I wouldn’t.
She gave me a brief smile accompanied by a nod before looking down at her pens lined up in front of her.
Grabbing her bobby pin, I placed it on her desk before turning around. I didn’t know why I felt kind of bad. It wasn’t my job to give this girl any morsel of hope. She’d have to find it on her own.
The professor returned. “Now, who can tell me the difference between the equation listed here, and the one we studied last week?”
The following night, I was tugging on a gray sweater dress while Daisy grumbled behind me. “We’re just friends. You and Toby should go out on your own.”
I wouldn’t take no for an answer. I’d been hanging out with Toby in some way for most of the week. Ever since we’d watched a movie at his place last weekend.
Daisy needed to get out, and I wanted to see Toby—win-win, in my opinion. “Let’s go already.” I checked my purse, then grabbed a tin of mints from my dresser and tossed them inside it.
Daisy groaned but hauled herself off her bed, tugging on her cardigan and fixing her hair.
I called a cab as we headed downstairs.
Neither of us had cars here. And I could’ve asked Toby to pick me up, but I wanted to make sure I could convince Daisy to come with us.
I’d left my old Corolla at home. Mom had bought it for me when I’d gotten my license, and I’d shared it with Drew when he got his. But I knew she’d have to ask Dad for the money to buy Drew a car if I took it with me to college.
And I knew enough about the campus before arriving to know I probably wouldn’t need it.
Daisy was silent as she climbed into the back seat with me. “Seriously, what’s up? Do you really not want to go?”
She’d gotten home in a weird mood last night. And although she’d thought I was asleep, I still heard her. She’d stopped crying over Quinn and Alexis weeks ago. Last night, I heard the tears return even as she tried to muffle them with her pillow.
“It’s not that … I mean”—she sighed, staring out the window at the blurring old buildings on campus—“I like Callum. I just, ugh, never mind.”
I got it, though. She liked Callum, but she loved Quinn.
Taking her hand, I squeezed it quickly, and she squeezed back.
The arcade was noisy and kind of dark. I hadn’t been to one since middle school, so I was excited when Toby had suggested it the night before. But when his eyes met mine before we stepped inside, I just wanted to steal him and hide away.
Preferably in a bedroom somewhere.
I tried to focus on the puck zooming across the table and failed. I missed, narrowing my eyes at Toby who was trying not to gloat. “You said you were the queen of air hockey.”
Growling under my breath, I smacked the puck toward him, which he effortlessly pushed back toward me. I managed to hit it before it got anywhere near the goal, almost sliding across the table on my stomach.
Toby laughed, and I wanted to growl some more, yet the sound of that deep laugh did things to me, so I couldn’t.
We’d lost Daisy and Callum near the hoops, but I figured she’d come find me if she needed me.
“Kiss me,” Toby whispered as we walked over to the kiosk.
Leaning up on my toes, I pressed my lips to his quickly. Toby made an irritated sound when I lowered to the ground and grabbed my hand. Pulling me to an alcove behind the race car driving games, he pushed me up against the wall.
“You get a sexy as fuck look in your eyes when you get competitive.” He nipped my neck, and my head dropped to the side as his teeth and tongue traveled higher.
“Yeah?” I asked, trying to stay in the present and not float away on the flutters invading my body.
“Mmm,” he hummed, licking my chin before finally, finally, finding my lips. They hovered, and my stomach flipped with sweet anticipation.
“More,” I said, my chest heaving against his.
Large hands grabbed mine, pinning them above my head. “Your wish is my command.”
His tongue diving inside my mouth cut off my laughter as it searched for mine.
I offered it to him, and his groan set my heart racing faster as it vibrated down my throat.
He tasted like spearmint and the soda we’d drank earlier. I felt ravenous, my teeth taking his lip and sucking, my hands trying to pull free of his to touch him.
“More?” he asked throatily, stealing his lip back and grinding his erection into my stomach.
Without a moment’s hesitation, I nodded.
We raced out of the arcade, and I glanced back quickly, finding Daisy laughing with Callum near the skill testers.
Knowing he’d take her home, I picked up my pace until we reached Toby’s car farther down the street.
He held the door open for me but grabbed me by the hips to devour my mouth once more before letting me climb in.
I felt breathless. Weightless and heated. Like I could fly away or combust at any moment.
The drive back to his place only took five minutes as he sped along back streets and navigated the slow flow of traffic, but it felt like an hour. His eyes constantly flew over to meet mine, and his grip on the steering wheel mirrored the way my hands clenched beneath my thighs.
Toby parked haphazardly, making me laugh again. I climbed out, almost forgetting about my purse laying in the foot well.
His hand shook slightly as he slid the key into the lock and pushed the door open. He didn’t let me move past him, grabbing me around the waist and slamming the door closed, the keys and my purse dropping to the entryway floor.
The ting resounded, but our breathing was louder as our hands pushed and shoved clothing off our bodies while our mouths tried to stay fused.
We thankfully made it to the top of the stairs before we collapsed. Toby fell over me before rising and yanking my panties down my legs.
“Holy fuck,” he breathed, running shaky hands over my thighs. “Later. I’ll explore later.”
I agreed and undid my bra. It didn’t make it to the floor, though; it just hung from me as he nuzzled his face between my breasts and shoved his briefs over his ass.
I didn’t get to see him, but if what I felt nudging at my entrance was any indication, I didn’t need to in order to know he was very well endowed.
Holy cracker jack.
“Pill?” he asked, pulling back and pushing a finger inside me. I groaned out a quiet, “Yes.”
Removing his finger, he aligned himself.
“Clean?” I asked.
“Of course. Ne
ver been bare before.”
His wet finger dragged over my lower lip. It should’ve grossed me out to have my own bodily fluids meet my mouth. Should’ve. But it really didn’t. It only made me feel more desperate.
Those blue eyes stared, his jaw slack before his mouth replaced his finger and he eased himself inside.
It wasn’t slow, but he was careful, for which I was grateful. He felt thick and so huge rising above me. I felt stretched and tiny in comparison.
“I’ve wanted to do this since I first laid eyes on you,” he rasped into my mouth, his hand grabbing my thigh and lifting my leg over his shoulder. Hips rotating, he continued, “Tell me … please tell me I get to do this whenever I want.”
Blinking, I could hardly make out what he looked like because he sure knew how to use his equipment. I managed to say, “Yes, whenever you want.”
I swear he said, “Always. I’ll always want this.” But everything turned into a blur as he overran my senses, and my body submitted to everything he was doing to it.
My hands coasted over his bulging biceps, my nails scoring his skin as he sent me hurdling toward orgasm.
And the most shocking thing wasn’t that he could do something no one else had done—not by having intercourse anyway. It was that he did it twice before emptying inside me on a loud bark of a groan.
“Spread them wider.”
I did, and Toby continued toying with me, my fists clenching the sheets.
The room was hazy with early rays of morning light and the scent of sex. Everything felt more tangible. The soft sheets, his velvet tongue, and the coarse stubble on his chin. We’d hardly slept, and I didn’t even care.
“Shit.” My hand grabbed his hair when his tongue took a long, leisurely lick where my thighs met my sex. Over and over.
I’d learned quickly that Toby liked to torture. He liked to leave me so strung out, I was begging for it. Which never took long.
“Now,” I said.
His chuckle was wicked, but he wouldn’t win this time. I nudged his head away, grinning at his widening eyes as I pushed him to the bed.
I straddled his waist, positioning him at my entrance before sinking down. Those vivid blue orbs flared, his nostrils too, as he reached up and squeezed my breasts. Waiting until I sank down fully, he then flipped me on my back and nipped my neck. “Nice try.”
His hips swiveled, and I shifted my legs higher up his back. “Shut up and kiss me.”
Afterward, we laid in sluggish, euphoric states. Our bodies clammy, and our smiles sleepy and sated.
I knew I should probably get home. I needed a shower and a hot meal, but I was reluctant to leave this room. To leave him.
The black framed picture sitting on his dark wood dresser stared at me. A picture of him and his dad when Toby was probably only in middle school. They looked happy with matching grins and dark hair, arms around each other.
With my finger trailing over Toby’s sparse chest hairs, I pondered as he snoozed. “Tell me about your mom.”
I wasn’t sure if he’d heard me, but then, without opening his eyes, he said. “She left when I was a kid. Not much else to say.”
I didn’t push, knowing without him saying so that it was obviously a sore subject. “My dad left too.”
One eye opened, looking tired but curious. “Aren’t we quite the pair?”
Smirking despite the ugly subject matter, I agreed. “Indeed.”
“Why’d he leave?”
I thought about telling him. I was sleeping with him. And the way I felt about him seemed way too strong to be misconstrued for something as simple as like. But I didn’t want to discuss my dad right now. I felt good—better than good—and I didn’t want that feeling tainted by anything else.
“A story for another time.” I yawned, pushing off his chest. The sun had ascended hours ago, and my stomach growled.
“Hungry?” he said, humor tinging his sleepy voice. “I’ll make us something.”
“Sure.” I bit my lip. “Mind if I take a shower first?”
“Mi casa es su casa.”
Laughing quietly, I climbed out of bed and checked the hall before running down it to grab my panties and bra. I almost squealed when I saw Quinn’s door open, holding my undergarments to my chest as if they’d actually hide anything. Thankfully, he wasn’t even in there.
In the bathroom, I showered quickly, cringing at all the male products and opting not to wash my hair.
Spying my reflection in the fogged over mirror as I was drying myself, I froze.
I looked like I’d gone ten rounds with a vacuum cleaner. My hair was a tangled mess, my cheeks flushed bright red, and hickeys decorated my neck and chest.
Jesus stinking Christ.
I quickly stepped into my panties and strapped on my bra. Ripping the cabinet open, I scanned the contents, looking for a comb. That was when I saw them.
I didn’t need to pick them up to know what they were but couldn’t stop myself from leaning forward to read the labels.
Toby Hawthorne.
Two different types of antidepressants and another prescription I didn’t recognize the name of.
With my throat closing over and my heart thundering through my body, I closed the cabinet with shaky hands, abandoning my search for a comb.
My feet were two blocks of concrete as I unglued them from the tiles and moved back into the room. Toby had fallen asleep, and I stared, listening to my relentlessly pounding heart mingling with the sound of his snores.
The brown and gray sheets were half on the floor, half on his body, covering his manhood but exposing his muscular thighs and upper body.
How well do you really know someone?
You don’t.
Admittedly, I’d rushed into this way too quick. But I’d felt safe enough to do so. My gut said yes, and I trusted it.
It’d never let me down before.
Until now.
Grabbing the remainder of my clothes, I got dressed and quietly walked out of the house.
Yawning, I dragged my heavy eyelids open a few times before closing them again.
They sprang open a second later, and I sat straight up.
Pippa.
The bed was still rumpled, her scent still clinging to my pillows and sheets. Where was she?
I jumped out of bed, grabbing my sweats from the floor and tugging them on. Sniffing under my arms, I cringed, thinking I should probably take a quick shower before I rubbed myself all over her again.
Yeah, that was what I’d do.
Only, she wasn’t there. I opened every door upstairs, even Quinn’s, finding him half passed out on his bed before shutting the door and racing downstairs. Stopping at the bottom, I glanced back up the stairs where some of my clothes lay strewn on the carpet, then back down at where I remembered yanking off Pippa’s cardigan and tossing it somewhere near the kitchen entryway. It wasn’t there.
She was gone.
I walked around aimlessly, running over scenarios in my head for why she’d just up and leave.
Maybe her mom called with bad news. Bad things happened every day.
Maybe she felt sick all of a sudden and had to go back to her dorm.
Oh, fuck. Maybe she got her period and needed to get some tampons or whatever.
Daisy could’ve called her, seeing as Quinn clearly stayed out last night, which wasn’t like him. Yeah, that must’ve been it. I’d just text her—ask if everything was okay.
I made some coffee, taking my mug upstairs with me and sitting on the bed.
It occurred to me that I really should wash the sheets. Though, looking at them, I felt reluctant to get rid of any trace of her.
Leaning down, I sniffed the pillows. Her fading scent caused my chest to tighten.
Putting the mug down, I went in search of my jeans on the stairs. Finding my phone in them, I discovered a missed call from my dad. I sent him a quick text saying I’d call him later, then opened my last messages from Pippa and typed out a new one.
Me: Everything okay? Where’d you go?
When no response came through, I put my phone down and finished my coffee, staring at the carpet as I thought about the way she moaned. She wasn’t a big moaner when she came—she was a breathy panter, just as I’d predicted—but I’d managed to pull a few out of her.
Feeling smug, I downed the last of my coffee and picked up my phone again.
Still no response.
Me: Seriously. Starting to get worried here. Are you okay?
I stared at the screen long enough to see she’d read it, and long enough to realize she wasn’t going to respond.
Okay. So she was all right—physically—unless some random person had her phone.
What if she’d run into some asshole on the way home? It was only a few minutes’ walk, but still, there was bound to be some weird pricks lurking around Gray Springs.
Why didn’t she respond?
I stood, putting my mug down and stripping the bed. If she didn’t want to reply, fine.
Fucking fine.
I tugged the sheets off, then the pillowcases, and then took them downstairs to the laundry room, stuffing them in the machine. I added the detergent, slammed the door closed, and turned it on.
She could’ve at least replied. Told me she was napping or something.
How could she tell you if she was napping?
Because she clearly wasn’t asleep if she’d read my texts.
Nap or no nap, I didn’t know what the hell to make of this.
Yeah, I’d slept with plenty of chicks before, and some had even left before I’d woken up, but I didn’t care. All the less awkward, in my opinion.
But shit, this was us. This was my green-eyed, mint-flavored Pippa.
I’d never gone bareback with someone before and couldn’t even put her near any of those past experiences. She was more. Everything more.
And she was ruining my mind.
My gut sank, and I went back upstairs. I should go see her. Yeah, I’d do that.
About to remove my sweats, I paused, anger inflating my chest. No, fuck that.