But that wasn’t where the fear came from.
Because she had kissed Grant. Kissed him in a way that not only called up old passion, but told them both it was still there. They hadn’t talked about it. And when Kell showed up, she’d clarified that he was her ex. More than once.
All of which added up to one thing: She didn’t know what she wanted.
Well, not in the long run, anyway. Not beyond the next half hour. She knew exactly what she wanted right now.
She marched ahead of them when the elevator finally stopped on their floor, ignoring Grant as she passed his room, ignoring Kell when he followed her into theirs. She went straight for the phone but halted shy of it. That wasn’t fair. She had to say something to him first.
When she turned, he stood warily by the foyer, his hands in his pockets, shirt untucked, head dipped. Waiting.
“I’m going to get my own room,” she told him.
He didn’t move. “Why?”
Though the question was obvious, she hadn’t prepared an answer.
“I just…think it would be best,” she tried, knowing it was lame.
“Because…” When she didn’t elaborate, he pushed off the wall with his shoulder and wandered a few steps into the room. “Because you caught me and Neely staking claims.”
“Is that what you were doing?” If only that would generate some anger in her. Anger would make everything easier. But it wouldn’t come, probably because she had no right to it.
“Can you please be open about this?” He moved closer, and she could see his hands in his pockets were fisted. “Do I have a claim to stake? Or has Neely taken over?”
“I didn’t think you’d want one.”
“I don’t know if I do.”
Tears surged into her eyes, and she turned quickly away to hide them. It took several slow breaths before she could speak evenly. “He hasn’t taken over anything.”
“Maybe he doesn’t have to. You two have a powerful history.”
“Yes, history.” She sank onto the far bed and swiped at the moisture on her face. “I only came to him because I didn’t know anyone else who could help me. And I couldn’t do this alone.”
“I understand that.” He sighed and sat on the bed across from her. “I understand all of it, which makes everything a lot more difficult. Even with the parts of it that should make it simple.”
She knew he was talking about Olivia. When they’d talked last night, he’d asked plenty of questions but said very little in return.
“You’re being too tolerant.” She sniffled, and he pulled a tissue from the box on the nightstand and handed it to her. “Why aren’t you raging at me?”
“These aren’t exactly normal events,” he said. “Not for you and me, anyway. Maybe this is normal for Grant.”
She managed a smile and tossed the tissue in the wastebasket. “I’m pretty sure it is. Half of his normal, anyway.”
“He wants you.”
Her head came up and her mouth opened to protest, but the words didn’t come out. Though he had every reason to see things that weren’t there, she knew damned well he wasn’t. He nodded, and she stood and moved around the bed, needing distance from his pain.
“Just be open. Be real.” He stood but didn’t follow her. “You’ve kept secrets from me, but you’ve always been more real than anyone else in my life. That’s all I want from you now.”
It was the least she could give him. “I—I love you, Kell.” His body relaxed at her words, but she could tell he knew there was a but. “I—Grant kissed me. I let him. And I’m confused, because working with him reminds me of why I fell in love with him so long ago, and he’s a good, caring man—”
“Who’s also a warrior,” Kell broke in, scowling. “I get the appeal. I don’t need it spelled out for me.”
She swallowed, a little frightened. Openness was a minefield. But he’d asked for it and he deserved it, so she pressed on. “He’s like you. He is,” she insisted when he didn’t seem to like hearing it. “You’re a warrior, too, you just fight with words instead of guns. You’re both smart, and protective without being patronizing. You treat me like I’m smart and have something of value to contribute. But like you said.” She huffed and held out her arms. “This isn’t normal. Things will be very different when it’s over, even if I’m not dead.”
She choked on the last words, and Kell quickly came around to her, wrapping her against his chest. “You’re not going to die.”
“You don’t know that.” She closed her eyes and pressed her face into him. He smelled so good, like home and heat. “But if I do, that’s okay. It will be worse…” She couldn’t say it. “I will die before I let anything happen to her.”
“I know.” It was almost a whisper.
“But if you two are helping me— It would be worse if you died.” She meant “one of you,” and he got it.
“We won’t die, either.” He loosened his hold but didn’t let her go. When she didn’t lift her face he did it for her, holding her chin with his forefinger and thumb. “Neely’s too good, and I’m too determined.”
Zoe didn’t bother protesting anymore. His reassurances were flat, but he meant them. They had other things to think about. Things they could control. She started to move away, but Kell kept her close.
“I’m not going to pressure you right now,” he said. “You broke up with me, so I have no real claim and no right to ask anything of you.”
“You have a right to ask a lot of me.”
His lips curved. “I meant, to dictate your decisions.”
As far as she was concerned, he still had some rights. “I didn’t break up with you because I don’t care anymore. I did it to protect you and your family.”
His look recalled his accusations from the night before. “Would you have told me any of this if Olivia wasn’t part of the equation?”
Her mouth opened, but she couldn’t answer—which was, of course, answer enough.
“Yeah. You did it because you were scared. Because you thought I wouldn’t want you the same way if I knew about your past. And because you didn’t want to admit you’d lied to me.”
The truth had barbs as well as spines. She pulled free of him and backed up a few steps, as if that would stop the ripping, tearing honesty. “Maybe. Sure. I was scared. But I’m not a coward. I didn’t run and hide from everything. I’m confronting it head-on, and that’s because…because I still had hope we could rebuild our future.” She hadn’t dared focus on that hope or that it would have required telling him everything, anyway. It seemed easier to consider as a vague, future possibility once it was all over.
He stared at her. “Well. Kinda backfired, didn’t it?”
“Because of Grant, or because—”
“Yeah, because of Grant. Whatever old feelings exist between you, he cares about you now. And so do I. Look, I’m not pretending I don’t feel betrayed by what you did. And I can’t say how I’ll feel if they do stop using Olivia as a threat and turn her into a tool. But I’m not flying home in a snit, or picking a fight with the guy helping you. And I’m not trying to take you away from this. But I won’t stand back and let him steal you from me, either. I’m going to fight for you.”
Zoe’s eyes welled again. “Oh, Kell.”
“He’s going to fight, too.” She shook her head, but he stepped forward again. “Don’t be naïve. He’s not backing off. You saw that in the elevator. He considers you fair game.”
“Doesn’t that make you mad?”
To her shock, he grinned. “Nope. I’ve got a few aces. One of which is ownership of your company.”
It didn’t sink in right away. She was still processing the guilt and the reality of being wanted by both men, but his words slowly penetrated. “You…what?”
“I’m your buyer.”
She bit back the anger that finally, inappropriately, swelled. He’d bought her company and was just now telling her? “How?”
“I found out you were selling and swo
oped in. It was actually my first clue that something was wrong. Something more than emotional craziness.”
“Nice.” She glared at him, then shoved her hands into her hair and left them there. “I can’t believe you did that.”
“You wouldn’t have sold it if something wasn’t really wrong. I wanted to save it for you.”
That he would do something so monumental floored her. He’d have needed a loan, fast, and a smarter financial advisor than the one they’d been working with as a couple, in order to hide his identity from her.
“I don’t know what to say.”
He smiled gently and cupped her face in his hands. “You don’t have to say anything.”
“Thank you?”
“That’ll do. When this is all over, I’ll sell it back to you.” He leaned forward and kissed her gently. It wasn’t hungry or demanding, just telling her he loved her, still.
And confusing her all the more.
Kell hovered while she called the front desk to arrange for another room, glad for the hotel’s high rating that allowed her to give them her credit card over the phone and have staff bring her the key card and carry her bag to her new room down the hall. She was so tired and overwhelmed. She couldn’t see the next step, never mind down the road to dealing with her romantic mess. Food and sleep were all she wanted to face for the next nine hours.
But she’d just hung up from ordering room service when there was a knock on the door. Heart in her throat but too weary for adrenaline, she peered through the peephole. Great. Grant.
She opened the door. “How did you know what room I’m in? They’re not supposed to give out that information.”
He pressed past her into the room. “They didn’t. I followed you.”
She rolled her eyes and walked away to the sitting area, wanting some distance. He didn’t give it to her. When she sat on the love seat he sat on the chair beside her, his long legs trapping her in. She shifted to her right, toward the gap at the other end of the coffee table.
“This isn’t smart, Zoe.”
“It’s fine.”
“You’re vulnerable. You used your own credit card.”
She passed her hand over her eyes. “They know where we are already, but they’re not going to attack here. It’s too secure and too obvious. They’ll wait until we’re on the move again.”
“It depends on what they want. Killing you would be a lot easier if you were asleep rather than barreling down the highway.”
She dropped her head against the back of the love seat. “Fine. They can kill me. It’ll be easier.”
She’d never known silence could be alarmed. She tipped her head to the left to see Grant’s face. No, not alarm, something stronger. Something amazing. She doubted he’d have felt much more than a vague sorrow had she died last week, before she had gone down to the Keys, but now…
“You don’t go for easy,” he said softly.
“Not usually.”
“You’re just tired.”
“Definitely a factor.”
“And you’re getting a rush out of having two guys on the hook.”
She lurched upright, appalled. “I am not! I— Shit.” He was laughing. “There, you finally got a rise out of me. Happy?”
“Happier than when I thought you were ready to die.” He reached out and caught her hand, tugging her back. “Everything will work out. Don’t worry.”
She couldn’t believe him, no matter how confident he sounded. But her mouth didn’t heed her desire to avoid any more relationship talk. “I don’t have two men on the hook.”
He eased back in his chair, wrapping an elbow over the ornate corner of it. “Oh? Did you tell Stone you’re done with him?”
“No! I’m not—” She growled. “Stop doing that.” It took a couple of deep breaths before she sorted out what she wanted to say. “Kell thinks you’re staking a claim to me.”
“He’s a smart guy. Not that it takes a lot of brains to figure that out.”
“You don’t have a right to do that.”
“That kiss the other day says differently.”
“It was—” She couldn’t say meaningless. He’d know she was lying. “An aberration.”
“Then I vote we have more of them.”
“Seriously, Grant.”
“Okay.” He went earnest, unhooking his arm and leaning forward, elbows on knees. “If you can tell me, one hundred percent honestly, that I have no chance with you, that you have no romantic feelings for me, then I’ll back off.”
“I have no romantic feelings for you. You have no chance.”
“Nice try.” He stood, grinning, and actually patted her on the head. If she hadn’t been too weak to do so, she’d have ripped his hand off.
“Grant.”
“I said it had to be honest. Your eyes flicked to the left.”
She rolled them, knowing he was right. James had pointed out the tell during a charity poker game a year ago and never stopped teasing her about it.
“We do not need this right now,” she warned as he headed for the door.
“Don’t worry. I’m not going to seduce you or anything. I’ll just be myself, and at the end of the game, you won’t be able to resist me.” He said it lightly, but with an undertone of steel, and Zoe knew he was right. At least, had a chance to be right. She couldn’t imagine picking him over Kell, but she couldn’t imagine telling him no, either. Not at the moment.
“Oh, by the way.” He stopped at the door. “We’re heading for the airport at five tomorrow. Our guy is in San Francisco. Stone’s magic paralegal is getting us tickets to a benefit he’s attending. We should be able to talk to him there.”
And with that he was gone, leaving Zoe with a helluva lot of thinking to do.
* * *
They didn’t make it to five a.m.
Zoe hadn’t slept the night before, so she went to bed early and fell into deep slumber, shocked awake by a sharp noise outside her room. In normal circumstances she’d have lain still, listening, trying to determine if she’d heard something real or dreamed it.
Tonight, she knew and was out of bed and dressed before her brain could even process that she’d moved. She grabbed her bag and stood on tiptoe at the peephole. The hall was empty, but she was at the end of a short arm and couldn’t see the main hall, where Grant’s and Kell’s rooms were.
Shit. She couldn’t see to either side of her door, either. Stepping outside could make her a target, but she couldn’t stay trapped in here.
Her cell phone buzzed in her pocket. She struggled to get it free, cursing. The mini display showed Grant’s name. She answered and pressed her eye to the door again.
“What’s going on?” she asked. The hall was still empty.
“Get down here to my room. Fast.” The line went dead.
“Fuck.” She shoved her phone back in her pocket, took a deep breath, and gripped her bag in one hand, ready to swing it or use it as a shield. She unlocked the door, wincing at the loud snick it made, and eased it open, staying to the left. The hall outside, the part not in her blind spot, was clear. No one pushed the door open, and silence rang. She quickly spun around the jamb, and when no one attacked her from the left, she dashed down the hall, the untied laces on her sneakers clicking where they swung against her shoes.
Turning the corner, she skidded to a halt for half a second, arrested by the sight of a room’s door busted in. Debris littered the floor, the doorjamb destroyed where the lock had been.
She’d moved on toward Grant’s before she realized this was her former room. Kell’s room. Horror welled in her throat, burning with fear, but then Grant and Kell emerged into the hall ahead of her, carrying their own bags.
“Are you all right?” Zoe gasped as she reached them. She touched Kell’s arm, reached for his chest, but he brushed her aside.
“I’m fine. I was down here.”
That he was in Grant’s room instead of his own was weird enough to make her pause again, but they were pull
ing her toward the stairwell so she held her questions in and kept moving. A few minutes later, they were in a cab—which was faster than getting their vehicle from the valet—heading for God knew where. She had to bite her tongue hard to keep from asking questions that she knew the cabbie shouldn’t hear. They sat, all three cramped into the back seat, Zoe in the middle as if they wanted to protect her even though this was the second time Kell had been in the line of fire.
Finally, the cab dropped them at a twenty-four-hour diner close enough to the airport that Zoe could see flashing lights on circling planes. As they walked up to the glass door, she asked about the SUV.
“Rental company will pick it up,” Grant answered. “I’ll call them later.”
They went inside and paused to survey the place. It had a basic fifties-era construction, with booths lined up along huge windows and spinny stools at the Formica counter. Chrome shone everywhere—on table and stool edges and legs, the side of the counter and booths, and around mirrors and framed Elvis posters mounted on the little bit of plain wall space. Though the place was empty of customers, Zoe could smell bacon and fresh coffee. Her stomach growled.
A waitress came through the swinging door from the kitchen, toweling off her hands. “Sit anywhere, hons. I’ll be right with you.”
Grant led them to a booth on the far right, the last one along the side of the room. It was against the wall instead of the window, which looked out on a chain-link fence rather than the front parking lot. He made Zoe slide in first, then Kell, and he took the window side.
The waitress arrived immediately at their table with a coffeepot in one hand and menus in the other. She doled them out and poured coffee without asking, her expression light and friendly. “I’ll be right back to take your orders. You need me faster, just holler for Fay.”
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