“Out of control?”
“Yeah,” he admitted. “Totally out of control. I need to help Harry. It’s not like him to go around me to get to Toni, so I know he’s hiding something. I’m like a father to some of these kids, so they try to avoid me when they can, like they would avoid admitting something to their real father. But when I get involved, it touches them. They realize I care. I can’t let him down.”
“And I totally support that. One hundred percent,” she assured him softly. “Look, I know this is my fault. And I know you’re treading on eggshells at the moment because of what I told you. You don’t want me to think you’re like my dad.” She grimaced. “I don’t want that to be a problem today. My issues are my issues, and I’ve been selfish in making those issues take precedence over everything else where we’re concerned. Let’s make today about you. What do you need from me?”
The simplicity of her offer stunned him. Her generosity soothed the raw ache inside that she herself had caused.
“I need to see you,” he whispered ruggedly. Maybe the gruffness of his words was confirmation of how rattled he was feeling because she sensed the hidden layer behind his basic statement.
Nodding, she murmured, “You need to see me while you’re talking with Harry? Okay, well, do you have a room with a window? Or an office with a door that has a window maybe?”
He blew out a breath. Of course. Such a simple solution. “Yeah. The staff room has a window.”
She smiled at him, gently, and his Bear lapped it up. Basked in the softness that was aimed at him, that was his alone. “There we go. Well, I’ll sit outside and make sure you can see me while you deal with Harry and Toni, okay?”
“Thank you,” he said. “We can go…”
When he broke off, she seemed to understand what he was saying. Her smile stayed gentle, understanding, and reassuring.
From Cinda, at any other time, that smile would have inspired terror in him. Well, terror of a distinctly female variety.
Female Shifters could be severe pains in the asses.
Look at the chaos Jesse and Ava were capable of making with only four decades between them. This woman was nearer seventy. Only the Goddess knew what mischief she was capable of making now.
“It’s okay. We can go back to my apartment.”
He blinked at her. “You’ve been down here long enough to have digs?”
She shook her head. “It’s been my apartment for a long time. I was smart.” Her smile turned rueful. “I bought before the boom.”
“When hasn’t there been a boom in Houston?”
“True. But I bought before the prices went insane.”
“Real estate tycoon, huh?” he teased, stunning himself with the ability to do just that.
She seemed to take heart from that, seemed to realize he’d calmed down, and he had. She’d done that for him. By agreeing to help appease his Bear, he no longer felt like he was about to turn rogue.
He scrambled to his feet, then reached for her hand. When she slipped her fingers through his, his Bear rumbled and rattled around inside. He got the feeling her She Bear did too because she looked up at him quickly, then glanced down at her feet.
In silence, they passed the tables still full from lunch with kids half eating, half checking them out as they passed.
None of them had the courage to call them out, or even to tease Jarvis for holding someone’s hand. He wasn’t sure why. They were capable of it, but maybe his behavior had been weird enough to concern them; to make them realize that something strange was going on, and that Jarvis, ever slow to anger, was embers on a campfire ready to burn.
When he headed out of the dining room, Toni was there. She hadn’t set up, but was staring at a wall with corkboard on it. They always pinned shit up on there. Jobs and posters with advice on them. That kind of shit. Nothing for a rich Shifter’s mate, and a doctor to boot, to look at.
“We’re going to use the staff room.”
His words had her turning around. “I figured as much. That’s why I didn’t bother setting up.” She shrugged. “It’s not like there’s much to set up. I think we’re just talking with the kid. For the moment.”
Jarvis nodded and guided the three of them down a small, dim corridor away from the halogen-bright reception area. At the bottom of the hall, there was an opening where a few chairs were gathered around, an area upon which the staff room looked out.
“Will you be okay here, Cinda?” he asked softly when he brought them to a halt.
She nodded. “Of course.” Her smile wasn’t as wary as it had been earlier. “I hope you can clear things up for Harry.”
He blew out a breath. “Me too. I’m going to text him to tell him where we’re at. If you see him—tall, lanky redhead—ask him to come in, would you?”
“Sure. You go on in there.” She disconnected their hands, though the pain of separation flashed over both their faces and wafted him away.
“I won’t be long,” he promised her, the words a vow‒ words he needed to utter to ensure she had no intentions of running.
“You’ll be as long as you need to be,” she told him softly.
Her understanding had him relaxing his guards. Not by much, but by just a little. Trust would take a long time in coming, but they’d get there.
They had no choice.
They were mates.
Chapter 4
Blowing out a wobbly breath, Cinda staggered backwards and sat heavily on the under padded bench. Her ass protested the move, but the slight discomfort jolted her from the weird fuzz overtaking her brain.
Before she could gawk into space too long, she heard footsteps. Just as Jarvis had described, a tall, lanky redhead appeared and looked nervously around. He jolted when he saw her and backed off.
“Jarvis said to go on through,” she told him, keeping her voice low and level. He scowled at her, then shot a glare at the door behind which Toni and her mate had gone.
The kid looked like he was going to bolt, and that was only from her presence there. Or that was what she’d figured.
“Jarvis is in there?” The kid’s voice was croaky, and when she nodded, his shoulders slumped. “Damn. I didn’t want him to know about this.”
“The doctor didn’t think you’d want to be alone with her.”
He grunted. “I would have asked Jarvis about this if I’d thought he could help.” He clenched his jaw, and as he did, a band of freckles appeared under the pale tension gathered about his mouth. He wasn’t a bad looking kid, just way too thin for his own good.
In fact, he looked a bit like Michael Douglas had in his heyday. Back when he and Kathleen Turner had been hacking through the jungle in Romancing the Stone—one of her favorite all time films.
“He won’t bite,” was all she said, not wanting to interfere but well aware that the boy was more likely to run than to step forward. She knew how important this was to Jarvis.
Hell, he was waiting on Claiming her because of it.
Not that she minded. If anything, she respected him for it.
This entire shelter was more than she’d ever expected from her mate. When her brother had upped and joined an MC, the entire family had been stunned and horrified. It didn’t matter that the MC was also a Bear Clan. They’d all been ashamed of Mundo’s choices.
When his brothers had come around and visited the family home, she knew her parents had softened some. All the ones he’d had pop in for visits had been mighty respectful, and they’d impressed her father most of all.
She’d never been all that impressed.
They rode for an MC. It wasn’t like they were fucking lawyers or bank managers. They weren’t even realtors, dammit. Their jobs held no ounce of honor.
As a result, she’d never expected much of her mate. Something she’d never admit to him because throwing that on the fire of all her other confessions was just a step too far.
She wanted to be honest with him, but there was no need to be that honest. Especially when
her expectations had been so blown out of the water, she was literally gasping for air.
Whatever she’d expected him to do while she lived her life and allowed herself to acclimate to the notion of being mated to a brother in an MC, it hadn’t been running of a homeless shelter.
That was so far out of the realms of her expectations, she was back in the water once more.
She sighed, hating herself for having judged him, but knew there was little she could to do make up for the past.
The only thing she could do was be here for him now and accepting the repercussions of her actions.
He was going to be clingy and over possessive. And she was going to want to kill him from time to time, but that was her fault.
She’d caused that, and her momma hadn’t raised a fool. She’d take the blame for her mistake and would live with the damage she’d caused. Even if that meant putting up with his Bear pulling temper tantrums. Eventually, all would work out fine.
Huffing at the thought, and hoping to the Goddess she wasn’t underestimating just what a number she’d pulled on her mate, she reached in her purse for a bottle of water. As she started to open the lid, squeaking footsteps came down the hall and a girl appeared about Harry’s age.
Cinda sat quietly in the corner, watching the girl peer into the staffroom. From her vantage point, Cinda knew Jarvis could see her if he turned his head, but the conversation was focused on Harry and it was getting a little heated if Cinda was reading the situation correctly.
And hell, she’d won the Pulitzer twice. She figured she knew how to read a situation.
The girl’s shoulders slumped, just like Harry’s had done at the sight of Jarvis.
“Everything okay?” Cinda asked softly, trying to avoid startling the girl, but knowing it was a bust. The young woman had had no idea she was sharing the seating area with anyone, but she didn’t shriek or jump too much. Just jerked like she’d been shot.
Her head whipped to the side and when she saw Cinda, her eyes flared wide as she backed off. “I’m not going to hurt you,” Cinda tried to reassure, but wasn’t sure if it worked as the kid started to rush off.
Then, the sneakers stopped squeaking against the linoleum, and Cinda heard more footsteps. This time, they were approaching her again.
The kid peered around the corner. “I saw you talking with Jarvis ten minutes ago.”
Cinda nodded. “I’m not surprised. We did make a bit of a spectacle of ourselves in there.”
“I’ve never seen Jarvis get angry.”
“That’s because I’m the one person in the whole world who can do it,” Cinda said ruefully. She’d always known why, of course, but he hadn’t. And it had always perplexed him.
“How come?” The girl stepped out from around the corner and shuffled to the seat opposite Cinda.
She was going to assume that Jarvis’s status as a Shifter was unknown so she stuck to the usual, “I’m his wife.”
That had the girl gawking harder. “Jarvis is married?”
“Yeah.”
“Why didn’t he tell us?”
“It’s a long, painful story,” Cinda murmured, a sad twist to her lips. What else could she say? It was partially the truth.
“I’m sorry to hear that.” The girl frowned. “Did you hurt him?”
Such accusation! Goddess. Cinda’s eyes widened at the sudden aggression in the meek child and realized that Jarvis, if he knew it or not, had a shelter full of mini protectors.
The thought amused her.
The ultimate predator protected by a homeless shelter full of prey.
Not that it was politically correct to think of humans as prey anymore, but still, the metaphor was too delicious to ignore.
“I probably did, but he probably hurt me too.” Not that he’d known he’d been hurting her of course. But by simply existing, and by being apart from her, she’d hurt. Internally. A nonstop, constant ache that went with her wherever she wandered on this Earth.
“Are you getting back together?”
Cinda nodded. “You ask a lot of questions.”
A rueful shrug was the girl’s reply. Until she murmured, “I ask them, but you don’t have to answer. Not many people do.”
“Jarvis does though, right?” Cinda hazarded a guess.
A beaming smile was the clue she was right. Why was Cinda not surprised?
“Always,” the girl murmured. “That’s why Harry and I come here. Jarvis looks after us and if we need to know something, or need help, he always pulls through.”
“You’re Leah?” Cinda asked carefully.
Leah nodded, but she shot Cinda a suspicious glance. “How did you know that?”
“Something I heard Harry say,” Cinda fibbed, preferring to maintain Jarvis’s rock solid image in Leah’s mind. If the girl thought Jarvis was talking about Harry and Leah behind their backs, that could be detrimental to the relationship her mate had cultivated. Leah calmed at Cinda’s response, then bit her lip as she peered over her shoulder at the staffroom window.
“You know what they’re talking about?” Cinda asked carefully.
Another nod.
“Is it about you?”
“Yeah.”
“How come you’re not in there, too? If it’s about you, I mean,” Cinda asked carefully when Leah turned around to glare at her.
“Because I didn’t want to talk about it. Not yet.”
“It must be serious if you want to talk to the doctor.”
Leah pressed a hand to her belly. “It’s not serious. Not yet.”
Cinda bit her lip. “You’re pregnant?”
Leah nodded. “I don’t know how far yet. But my belly’s not showing.”
It wouldn’t. Not for a while considering how underweight the girl was. One square meal a day wasn’t enough, she thought. Not for these kids.
Not for Leah whose too young, too slender body was nourishing a baby as well now.
“Harry’s the dad?”
Leah ducked her head in silent admission. “I’m scared.”
“You are?”
“Yeah. Harry’s a bit older than me. He might get into trouble. Statutory rape or something stupid like that.” She firmed her jaw. “I love him and he loves me. It wouldn’t matter but the baby kind of says we’re doing it, doesn’t it?”
The wry tone had Cinda blinking. “Yeah. Kinda.” She cleared her throat, trying not to laugh. It wasn’t that the situation was funny, but Leah’s tone was.
The girl seemed to realize because she shot Cinda a sheepish grin. It slowly died though as she murmured, “Harry’s in there because he wants Doctor Toni to convince me to have an abortion. Says we’re too young to be parents. Says we can’t look after ourselves, never mind a baby, too.”
Goddess, what could she say to that?
That it was the truth? But an abortion was so… final. A girl, so head over heels for her boyfriend, would never see an abortion as the solution.
“He’s scared,” Cinda replied, keeping her tone bland. “Aren’t you?”
Leah rolled her eyes. “Course I am. But all new parents are scared. Doesn’t matter if they’re poor or rich, my momma always said that you’re never prepared for a baby.”
She wasn’t sure why that solid gold piece of advice wasn’t having an effect on Leah, because Cinda, so many years older than the girl, felt them resonate deeply.
With the Claiming, usually, pregnancy occurred soon after. Not always. But most of the time. Especially at Cinda’s age. She was prime cub rearing material.
If her niece was lucky, Jarvis’s Prez’s daughter too, they’d have a few years left before they’d have to be really careful about falling pregnant. But for Cinda, there was little to no hope.
Was she ready to be a mom?
She doubted it.
So how the hell was it that this kid, not even legally an adult, was totally ready for parenthood?
Cinda wasn’t sure whether to be impressed or aghast.
Cautiously,
so cautiously it was worse than the time she’d almost walked onto a minefield in the Falklands, she asked, “Do you really think you’d be able to do everything you need to?”
Leah frowned. “What do you mean?”
Cinda screwed on the cap of her water bottle, and then leaning forward, rested her elbows on her knees. “Like, do you think you could be a mom?”
“I don’t need you to judge me,” Leah snapped, rearing up onto her feet.
Cinda immediately shook her head. “I’m not judging. I’m asking. Because I’m a hell of a lot older than you and I seriously doubt I’d be ready either.”
Leah, apparently sensing Cinda’s bewilderment, eyed her strangely. “Like I told you, my mom said no parent is ever ready.”
“Did you like your mom?”
Leah flinched at that. “I did until she got sick.”
“How did she get sick?”
The girl jerked her chin up. “Drugs.”
“What kind of drugs?”
“She hurt her back at work, got some meds, then got hooked on the meds.”
There was a whole lost generation to the opioid crisis that had struck before the Twenties had been in full swing. Cinda quickly rifled through her memory banks for all she could remember about that time. Whole families had been destroyed in the aftermath of a period when doctors had been over prescribing opiates to cure ‘basic’ pains. In the end, feeding the addiction was easier and cheaper with heroin than it was with prescription drugs.
In some areas, the poorer communities had known a time where everyone knew someone who’d been affected by the crisis. Be it by death or simply knowledge of someone who was an addict.
To Leah, she murmured, “I’m sorry.”
“I don’t need your pity. Neither does my mom.”
“Is she still alive?” Cinda asked softly, not taking offense at the girl’s snarled reply. How could she?
“Yeah. But we don’t talk anymore.”
“I guess that makes sense. Look at you. You’re living on the streets and you’re staying clean.”
A glint appeared in Leah’s eye and her chest puffed out. “Exactly. I told Harry that. Told him we’re already a thousand times stronger. We ain’t never touched any drugs, and we get offers all the time. But we don’t.”
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