“You’ve got to be kidding me, sis,” he says as Quinn steps out of the Pullman.
“I know. It’s different, but he can afford to live this way.”
“Ms. Wynn,” Quinn says with a nod as he opens the back passenger door for me.
“Quinn, I’d like you to meet my brother, Curtis. Curtis, this is Quinn, Damon’s assistant.”
Curtis shakes his hand, that same smirk still playing on his face. “Nice to meet you, Quinn. Please get my sister back to Manhattan safely.”
“Will do, sir. It’s nice to meet you.”
The door shuts, and relieved, I sink into the seat. Thank goodness that’s over with. He handled the news of me shacking up with a guy for the weekend better than I expected. Of course, had he known the whole story, he’d be ready to kick Damon’s ass.
***
It’s six in the evening, and I’m beginning to cook dinner for Damon. It’s our last night together, so I’m making it special. He phoned at five o’clock, upset that he wouldn’t be home until seven.
I’m placing some candles in the center of the table, setting a romantic feel, when the phone in the living room rings. I wonder if I’m supposed to answer that. Maybe it’s Quinn calling again for some reason.
“Hello.”
“Yes, could I speak to Mr. Lear please?”
“He isn’t home yet. Can I ask who’s calling?”
“This is Wendy. I’m the receptionist in the lobby downstairs. There’s a woman here to see Mr. Lear, but I’ll let her know he hasn’t arrived home.”
“Um, wait. If I come down, can you please have someone let me back into the penthouse?”
“Of course, ma’am.”
“Please tell the woman to wait. I’ll be right there.”
I slip on some shoes and take the elevator. My stomach is doing somersaults as a million different scenarios run through my head. Surely, it’s nothing. Maybe it’s someone delivering dry cleaning.
I approach the desk, and a beautiful blonde is standing next to it. She’s definitely not delivering clean clothes.
“Hi, I’m Alayna, Damon’s friend. Can I help you with something?”
A faint smile appears on her face as she raises her brows. “A friend of Damon’s? Interesting. He didn’t tell me he was having company. I see now why he cancelled our weekend plans.”
My somersaults instantly turn into pangs of pain.
“Excuse me? Who are you?”
“I’m Jacqueline.” She reaches her perfectly manicured hand out for me to shake. This woman is put together well, and she’s stunning, wearing a navy coat that is ruffled around the collar and belted, showing off her curvy figure.
She has matching heels, and I’m glad I can’t see what is under her coat. I couldn’t handle feeling any worse about myself at the moment. I shake her hand.
“And who are you exactly?”
“Since Damon cancelled on me, I was going to surprise him this evening instead, but it seems I’ve been replaced.”
“How long have you known him?” I ask.
“We’ve been seeing each other for four years.”
My hand goes to my stomach as I clear the lump thickening in my throat. She’s staring smugly, loving every minute of this.
“He’s not returned from work yet. I need to get back upstairs, and you’ll need to reach him on his phone.”
“Well, can’t you tell him I was here?”
“No, I can’t because I won’t be here when he gets home. I wish I could say it was nice to meet you, but I can’t do that, either.” I turn to Wendy at the desk.
“Please get someone to let me back up to Mr. Lear’s place, and could you also call a taxi?”
“Yes, ma’am, right away.”
I’m mortified and need to vomit. From the expression on Wendy’s face, I assume she’s heard my conversation with this other woman. Actually, I guess I’d be the other woman. I never look back to see if this Jacqueline leaves, and it feels like an eternity before I make it into the penthouse.
I shut off the oven and run to my room. I’m shoving things into my suitcase as quickly as possible. The tears begin to come, and I’m furious that I can’t stop them.
I figured Damon had some dark secrets due to his sexual preferences, but I never expected to hear that he had been seeing someone for four years.
Leaving the gifts Damon purchased for me on the bed, I get out of the building as fast as I can. A taxi pulls up soon after, and I’m sobbing as I tell him to take me to Felicia’s. I need my friend right now.
Chapter Eleven
Damon
I’ve been stuck at work late, and I’m angry for many reasons. I’ve missed Alayna today, and I’m not comfortable with that feeling. I’m also not pleased that she’s leaving tomorrow. Then, to make matters worse, Leon still has no leads on who the email was from.
I get home, and when I reach my penthouse, I know immediately that something isn’t right. The table is half set, there are pans and cooking ingredients everywhere, and I don’t see or hear anyone.
Getting a sick feeling, I hurry down the hallway and find Alayna’s stuff gone again. The gifts I’d given her are setting on the bed.
Fuck! Not again. I call Quinn.
“Did Alayna phone you for a ride?”
“No, sir.”
“Well, did she seem OK after her lunch with her brother?”
“Yes, she was in a pleasant mood when Roger and I dropped her off.”
“OK, thank you.” I hang up and call downstairs.
“This is Mr. Lear. Did my guest, Ms. Wynn, happen to speak to you this evening, maybe for a taxi?”
“Um, yes, sir.”
“Well, what did she say?” I ask bitterly.
“Sir, a woman showed up, so Ms. Wynn came down to speak with her. She was upset after and had me call a taxi for her.”
“What did the woman look like?”
“She was blonde and very pretty.”
“Thank you.” I should’ve known Jacqueline was behind this. Felicia’s ... maybe Alayna went there.
“Seth, is Alayna at your place by chance?”
“Man, you are digging yourself into the biggest fucking hole and taking me down with you.”
“She’s there then?”
“Yes, she’s here, and she’s upset. What did you do to her? She’s in one of the bedrooms crying to Felicia.”
Shit. I’m ill knowing I’ve hurt her.
“I’m coming over there.”
“Like hell you are. I mean it this time. Stay the fuck away from her. Felicia told me Alayna had bruises on her when they went to lunch Saturday. I told you she’s a sweet woman with little experience. You need to let her go.”
“I won’t do that. This is a misunderstanding, and I’m coming over there.”
“I won’t let you in, Damon, unless she tells me to.”
“Why don’t you believe me? I’ve never lied to you.”
“If you say it’s a misunderstanding, I believe you, but I still don’t want you dragging her into your twisted world.”
“It’s not entirely twisted.”
“I told you years ago to get help for what you went through, but you didn’t listen, and the coping methods you picked up are going to leave you a lonely man.”
“Seth, I’m making some changes, but I can’t be a different person overnight. I would never intentionally hurt her feelings.”
“I’m sorry, man. I have to go.”
Seth hangs up on me, so I call Jacqueline.
“Hello.”
“What the fuck did you do?” I ask.
“Well, good evening to you, too. You’re the one who lied to me. You should’ve been honest about your weekend plans, and I wouldn’t have appeared out of the blue.”
“You sent her running, and I didn’t even do anything wrong.”
“Yes, you did. You should’ve been honest with me.”
“What did you tell her?”
“She asked how long I�
��d been seeing you, and I told her four years.”
I snarl into the phone. “Jacqueline, did you give her the impression that we have had a relationship for that long?”
“I said what I just told you. I don’t know how she took it.”
“I swear, you’re fixing this. You lead her to believe that.”
“OK, maybe I did. I could tell she was different, and it hurt knowing she had most likely been there all weekend. You’ve never let me stay more than a night.”
“Jacqueline, we’ve been over this countless times. I can’t help that I don’t have those kind of feelings for you.”
She’s quiet for a minute. “Fine. You’ve done a lot for me over the years. Give me her number.”
“Don’t make things worse.”
“I won’t.”
“Don’t tell her too much, either.”
“Damon, you should’ve told her the truth from the beginning and this wouldn’t have happened.”
I groan, hating how little control I have at the moment.
Alayna
I’m crying in bed at Felicia’s. I just talked her into leaving me alone. My phone rings, and if it’s Damon, I’m not speaking to him. I let it go to voicemail since it’s a number I don’t recognize. Soon I have a message, so I listen to it.
“Alayna, this is Jacqueline. We met earlier. I have to confess that I wasn’t entirely truthful with you. Please phone me back.”
I sit straight up and wipe my eyes. What does she mean? I don’t need this kind of stress in my life. The sex I’m having with Damon might be phenomenal, but this happening made me see how much he means to me.
I’m falling in love with him, and his inability to be honest and open is going to continue to hurt me. I feel it, but I’m too curious not to call her back.
“This is Alayna.”
“Would you please meet me for coffee?”
“Did Damon put you up to this?”
“Yes, but it’s the right thing for me to do.”
“How do I know you’ll tell me the truth?”
“Do you think if I was seeing him, I’d want to make things better between the two of you?”
I blow my nose. She has a point.
***
He’s called and texted me many times, but I refuse to speak to him until I hear her side of the story. I have no idea why, but Seth said Damon called him, and when he found out I was going to meet Jacqueline, he insisted they go with me.
Seth claims Damon is only worried about me being alone in the city after dark. I don’t believe he’d put me in a dangerous situation, so surely this woman isn’t a threat. He has, however, dragged our friends into this shit and out on a Monday night.
We go to a coffee shop that’s central to the both of us. Seth and Felicia follow me in, and after buying a coffee, they get a table of their own but sit close enough to keep watch. She isn’t here yet, and I find myself becoming angrier. I get out my phone and text Damon.
Me: I’m waiting on Jacqueline. Why should I do this for you when all you keep giving me is heartache?
Damon: I have never tried to hurt you. This is a misunderstanding. Please come back here after, so we can talk.
Me: No, Damon. You’re not getting your way this time. Regardless of whether I forgive you, I’m staying with Felicia and Seth tonight and going back to St. Louis tomorrow. I need time to think about what’s best for my heart. I have to go. Your girlfriend, fuck toy, whatever it is you call her has entered the premises.
Damon: She is neither of those things! You are maddening!
Me: Yeah, well you’ve become a real pain in my ass.
Jacqueline holds a finger up, signaling for me to wait on her while she grabs a coffee.
“Hi. Thank you for meeting,” she says after taking a seat across from me. “Listen, I’m sorry. I wasn’t completely clear about what type of arrangement Damon and I have. I was caught off guard by your presence at his place since he doesn’t let women stay with him.”
“But obviously you do.”
“Six times a year, doll. He takes me out somewhere nice to eat, we play for the night and then I leave. As far as I know, you should feel pretty damn special. I’m the only woman who’s stayed in that penthouse besides his family, and he’s never allowed me to stay more than a night. He’s also never slept in bed with me.”
“But four years is a long time, and why did you imply your relationship was different?”
She sighs before taking a sip of her coffee. When her eyes meet mine again, I see how crystal blue they are. Why would this beautiful woman tolerate that kind of relationship with him for four years?
“I was jealous. I’ve always desired more with Damon, but he’s never reciprocated. Once I heard how frantic he was over you leaving, I realized he has feelings for you. He’s my friend, so I had to make things right. I don’t want to cause him pain.”
I stare down at my cup and rub the side of it.
“He’s really screwed up, isn’t he?”
“Yes, I believe he is, but he has a good heart. I think it can be healed.”
“I’m not so sure about that.”
“I don’t believe he’ll ever give up his kinky behavior entirely, so if that’s what you’re hoping for, you’re wasting your time, but I’ve always believed if Damon could fall in love, he’d open up and be happier.”
“I know it’s personal, but he told me he’s always gone somewhere for sex. Where in the hell does he go?”
“It’s basically an upscale sex club. That’s how we met. As far as I know, I’m the only one he has ever agreed to see outside the place. I think it was because I didn’t come across as needy, but even I wasn’t immune to the charm and sex appeal Damon exudes.”
“He claims he’s going to have sex with only me and no one else,” I say.
“That’s huge. You don’t understand what a change that is for him. He’s been doing the same thing for probably ten years. I can’t lie. It’s disappointing to think I won’t see him again, but I’m happy he’s beginning to let someone in.”
“If you feel that way, then why do you engage in the same behavior?”
“I’m just as screwed up, sweetie, but I don’t believe my lifestyle is unhealthy unless I do it forever. I haven’t found that special someone yet.”
I take a long sip of my coffee, weighing whether I want an answer to my next question.
“Do you know what messed him up so badly?”
“No. I never asked. I didn’t want to have to answer the same question. Look, I need to run, but he’s a good person, Alayna.”
“I’m surprised he let you meet with me. He had to have known we would discuss some of this.”
“These are things you needed to know, and if I had to guess, he just couldn’t be the one to tell you.”
We leave the coffee shop, and I’m exhausted. How many women has he been with? I’m certain I’d never want to know.
Was he really going to give up this place he goes to and only be with me? How could I be enough, and how could I trust that he won’t go back?
Felicia and Seth don’t say a word on the drive to their place. I stare out the window as my mind attempts to dissect one thought after another. Once inside, Felicia hugs me. “This is some heavy shit, so I won’t pry, but please promise me you’ll be careful.”
“I promise. Thanks for everything.” I no sooner get to my room, and my phone rings. “Hello.”
“Alayna, please talk to me,” Damon says anxiously.
“OK. We’ll talk. You cancelled with Jacqueline for the weekend, but you didn’t tell her it was over, so that implies you’re not ready to give up the life you’ve been leading.”
“I told you I only wanted to be with you.”
“You said you don’t do relationships. I can’t look back four years from now, and be no further along with you than Jacqueline is.”
“Alayna, you’re already further,” Damon says solemnly. He sounds sad, and it’s breaking my heart when it
shouldn’t after all he’s put me through. “Please don’t give up on me.”
This man possesses my heart and I want his. I need him to love me. “I’m trying hard not to, Damon. I’ll speak to you after I’m in St. Louis.”
“Will you at least let Roger drive you to the airport tomorrow? It’s important I know you made it there safely.”
“Fine, Damon. I have to go.”
Damon
My heart is fucking hurting again. I realize I’ve been staring at my computer screen for twenty minutes. There’s a knock at my door, so I glance up and see George in the doorway.
“Can I come in?”
“Sure. What do you need?”
“You’re killing me with the mood swings today. You look miserable. What happened?”
I exhale the deep breath that’s been weighing me down since I last spoke to Alayna.
“She left, and I’m not happy about it. I’m not sure if she’s going to see me again, either. I sort of screwed it up.”
“Sort of, huh?”
“OK, asshole. I screwed it up. I wasn’t honest with her about something.”
“Fix it. I’m tired of doing your work.”
I don’t argue with him. I have had my head up my ass lately when it comes to this place.
“I got another damn email this morning.”
“What did it say?”
“‘Is this worth Ms. Wynn discovering you’re the Golden Boy?’”
“Shit, Golden ... Golding. This person knows your real name, which means they know your past.”
“It’s driving me nuts not knowing what this person plans to do. Leon hasn’t given me any answers, but he swears he’s working on it. I’m beginning to wonder if it is Vasser publishing,” I say.
“I wouldn’t put anything past Stan Vasser. He’s dishonest and furious that he’s losing his company.”
“Right now, this person isn’t asking for anything, but if Stan’s behind this, I have to prove it. In the meantime, I need to get Alayna back here. I can’t protect her if she’s in St. Louis.”
Chapter Twelve
Alayna
I’d left my vehicle at the airport, so I trudge my way to it and head to my apartment. It’s only in the afternoon, but I’m exhausted. Damon Lear is exhausting.
One Urge, One Plea, Keep Me Trilogy Page 15