“We have to go back for him,” I said, taking the reins of my horse and turning him around. “We need to get his body back.”
General Barric and Sage moved their horses so they were in my way.
“Please, Lady Blair,” Sage said, his eyes the saddest I had seen them in the long time he had been my protector. “Listen to reason. There’s nothing you can do for him now.”
General Barric stared at me with his misty eyes. “Lady Blair, let me save you, at least. Please.”
I stared at the fortress, at the sea elves.
If I went back, I was good as dead.
I knew they were right, but it was too rusting hard. I couldn’t move. So, I didn’t. In the end, Sage took my reins back and guided my horse away, because if it depended on me, I would either stay planted in that spot, or I would do something crazy.
As we put some distance between us and Mor Caer, the weight of what had happened crushed me. I didn’t fight the tears. I welcomed them as I hunched over my horse and sobbed for our crown prince.
5
Red
I was on my way to the coast when I received a message from General Barric, asking me to go to the Oren Palace instead. I didn’t understand why; there was no other explanation in the note, but since General Barric was the most decorated soldier of our army, and Lugh trusted him blindly, I didn’t think much about it. I assumed Lugh had asked him to send me the message, so I changed my route and went to the capital.
Upon arriving, I noticed something was wrong right away. As Lennox and I crossed the outer gates with our horses, we saw soldiers with a black band tied on their left arms, and black strips of clothes hanging from store entrances and windows of houses.
Someone had died.
My first thought was my mother. Queen Aurelia had been sick with depression and sadness since my father died. Several times, I had believed she would either take her own life to join him, or she would let herself wither away, until only her body was left.
It had finally happened.
But I didn’t wait to see. I approached one of the guards at the gate and asked him what was happening, who had died.
“I’m sorry, Prince Redlen,” the guard said, his eyes to his feet. “We were instructed not to dispense any information, not even to you. You should go to the Oren Palace and see for yourself.”
That didn’t sit well with me.
Knowing I could be faster than a horse, I hopped off the mare I had borrowed from the Winter Court, shifted into my fox, and raced to the palace.
I hadn’t come all the way from the Winter Court to here in my fox form because I would tire too fast and needed more rest than a horse would. But now … now the distance was short, and the curiosity hurt.
Lennox also turned into his fox and followed me. We arrived at the palace and again no one told us what was happening, but everyone looked solemn and sad, all of them sporting the black bands around their left upper arm, or in full black clothing.
Once in the palace, I shifted back into my fae form. “Lugh? Mom?” I called in the grand entrance, my voice echoing through the tall and wide hallways.
General Barric appeared from a side corridor. “This way, Prince Redlen.” He gestured for me to follow him. I held my tongue as a hundred questions assaulted my chest and followed him into the Maple Courtyard—a burnt orange and soft red garden with thin trees and full bushes, brown stone benches, and a large fire pit in the center.
My mother, my sister holding the hand of a younger female fae I didn’t know, and Blair stood around the fire pit. They were all wearing black gowns and sniffed in almost synchronicity.
Realization clawed at me as I made my way to them. My eyes found the sword atop the fire pit, confirming my fear. My knees buckled, and I almost fell to the ground. “Lugh,” I whispered.
Blair reached for me and clasped her hands around my arm, steadying me. Even though I was keenly aware of her touch, I couldn’t peel my gaze from the fire, from the sword growing red in it.
“I’m so sorry,” Blair whispered.
Finally, I snapped and jerked away from her touch. “What the rake happened?”
A tear rolled down Blair’s fair face. My mother let out a loud sob and pressed a hand to her chest.
“Mother!” Maize yelled, turning to our mother and holding her.
Blair turned to the queen and helped Maize as my mother fainted. I should have stepped up and helped, but my mind was a jumble of thoughts and questions, and my chest was imploding with too many feelings. I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t move.
My mother’s and my sister’s handmaids came forward and helped them. They escorted my mother out, and my sister and the young fae followed.
Though I knew Lennox, General Barric, Sage, and Jora were at the courtyard entrance, I felt like I was left alone with Blair and the sword in the fire pit.
I gulped hard and walked closer to the fire pit. I wanted to reach out and touch the sword, as if I could touch my brother, as if I could save him of whatever fate had him.
“What happened?” I asked again, this time in a low voice.
Blair inhaled deeply. “The sea elves set a trap for us in Mor Caer. We went in, thinking they were still out at sea.”
I stared at her. “You went with him?”
“They killed Lugh,” she said, not answering my question, probably on purpose. “I tried to take his body, but there were too many of them.” Her voice broke, and she wiped another tear from her face. “I could only take his sword before Sage and General Barric dragged me out of there.”
More information, more feelings I could barely control. I had lost my brother, and I couldn’t believe Blair had been there. She could have been lost too.
I fell to my knees, my shoulders heavy. “I should have been there.”
A soft hand landed on my shoulder, and I struggled to know what to do. I wanted to both take her hand and pull her closer, and I wanted to jump away, to be as far as I could from her.
She was my brother’s betrothed. The brother who was now dead.
This knowledge choked me. It squeezed my chest until it was too hard to breathe.
Besides the pain of losing my older brother, there were other problems we needed to solve soon.
I inhaled deeply and pushed up to my feet. “We still have a battle to fight, and despite having lost our crown prince, we need to show them we’re strong and united.”
Blair’s hand dropped and her gaze along with it. A knot appeared between her delicate brows when she saw the dagger secured to my waist.
“I—” I opened my mouth to blurt out some excuse, but a new voice saved me.
“The rebel prince has returned.” Blair and I turned to see Mahaeru walking into the courtyard from one of the many entrances. I didn’t care about that nickname, since it fit me well; after all, I had abandoned the royal life long ago, and for many years, I even had been away from the Autumn Court, but coming from Mahaeru’s mouth, it seemed more like an insult.
I groaned. “Oh, you again.”
“There’s no time to mourn,” she said casually, as if she was simply stating the menu for supper.
“You knew this would happen, didn’t you?” The goddesses were sacred and divine creatures to be loved, feared, and worshipped. But right now, I despised them. “Couldn’t you have opened a portal and sent me here? So I could have been at his side during the trap? So I could save him?”
“Shh,” Blair whispered, punching my arm. “Don’t talk like that to a goddess.”
“This is her doing,” I barked, glaring at Mahaeru.
“It wouldn’t have made any difference,” the goddess said. She halted across the fire pit and looked at us with her hooded black eyes. “Even if you had been by his side, he would still have succumbed, and you would still blame yourself for not being able to save him. The only difference is that if you had been there, you would have lost your mind during the battle, and someone else would have tried to reason with you, someone you
care for. And she would have died trying to save you.”
Her gaze landed on Blair.
Oh, rust.
I gritted my teeth. “What are you doing now, then?”
The goddess’s chin lifted an inch. “I came to remind you, you’re the crown prince now.”
My stomach dropped. I had considered so many things that became a bigger problem with my brother’s death … the war against the sea elves, the fact that now Blair was betrothed-less, and that we didn’t have a crown prince anymore. But I had forgotten who was next in line.
Me.
“I can’t,” I said, my voice barely a whisper. I shook my head. The Autumn Court was a great kingdom, and it deserved someone better than me. “I can’t be crown prince. Give the title to Maize, or even Blair.” I gestured to her. Though I hadn’t seen her in years, I had heard all about how great she was, how she had grown into her future queen role, how the fae adored her, and how fair and beautiful she had become. I knew none of those were lies. Blair would make a fine queen, with or without a king.
She gasped. “I’m not of royal blood. This is your duty.”
I shook my head again. “I don’t want it.”
“Prince Redlen—“
I pointed a finger to Mahaeru, shutting her up. “Don’t! I don’t care about that, not now.” I ran my hand through my hair and shifted my weight. “I just … let me send these rusting sea elves back to where they came from, then we can talk about this subject. Until then, I don’t want to hear another word.”
“Pushing it aside won’t make it go away,” Mahaeru said. “The responsibility is still yours.”
I clenched my fists. Would it be wrong to hit a goddess? Could I? I bet she would see me coming and strike me down before I could blink. But would she strike me down now that I was the heir of the Autumn Court?
“Whatever,” I grumbled. “Right now, my focus will be on our enemies.” I turned my back to the goddess and walked to where Lennox, General Barric, and Sage stood like statues, near one of the entrances. I nodded at the general. “We leave for the coast in an hour.”
My first stop was Lugh’s chambers. I hadn’t seen my brother in so long, I needed to know he was still the same serious and dedicated fae he used to be when we were younger. I walked around, taking in the details. Though his bed was made and everything was clean, his mess hadn’t been touched. There was a pitcher of water beside his bed. His robe was lying on the armchair beside the nightstand. And open books and scrolls took over every inch of the place. Some of them were for pleasure, but most were war strategies and history books detailing what went wrong and where, and how to fix it. A notebook and pen and ink rested on the desk on the other side of the room, as if Lugh had stopped writing mid-sentence. Knowing my brother, he had been studying to be the best king the Autumn Court had ever seen.
If given the chance, I knew he would have been the best.
And now this duty fell on my shoulders like a heavy cloak, pulling me down and suffocating me. No, I wouldn’t think of this. I wouldn’t even dare go there. First, I had to deal with the sea elves. Only after that would I think and talk about what happened to me now that Lugh was de—
I inhaled deeply. I still couldn’t believe it.
My older brother was dead.
I pressed a hand to my chest as if that could ease the pain.
Next, I stopped at my chambers. They were similar to Lugh’s and Maize’s, with a sitting room, then the bedroom at the back. While Lugh’s looked like it was still inhabited, mine looked like a museum. There was no dust or dirty spots. The bed was also made and ready, but there was nothing else. No details, no paintings, no books, no decorations that were mine. I hadn’t slept here in so long.
Then, I visited my mother in her chambers.
“The healer just left,” Maize informed me as I approached the bed.
Queen Aurelia was lying in bed, a plethora of pillows propping her back up, but she wasn’t sleeping. She was looking out the window, and not seeing anything.
Once upon a time, my mother had been a happy and energetic queen, the most perfect mate my father could have. Together, they ruled the kingdom with firm but loving hands.
Until he died and left her alone. Then she became a shell.
I stopped across the bed from my sister. “Is it just shock?”
Maize nodded. “Losing father was too much for her. Now losing Lugh is breaking her all over again. She hasn’t been coherent since Blair came back with his sword.”
Blair …
I didn’t want to think about her yet. No, I didn’t have the head space for that.
Rust, so many things I was pushing back for later.
“How are you holding up?” I asked, looking at my sister. When we were younger, she had been spoiled, a brat, but it seemed time had done her well. She had grown into a beautiful fae with a firm stance, and she was by our mother’s side when she needed her the most.
Maize’s brown eyes filled with tears. “I’m breaking on the inside, but I won’t let that drag me under. I know we have to be stronger for her.” She nodded her chin toward our mother. “For our kingdom.” She wiped at her eyes before the tears fell. “Did you realize you’re now the cro—“
I raised my hand. “No, don’t go there. I don’t want to think about that. One problem at a time.”
She nodded. “Always the rebel prince. But I understand.” She brushed a strand of her light orange hair aside and inhaled deeply. “And how are you doing?”
I scoffed. “Don’t you know me? I’m locking my feelings away and just acting, doing what I have to.”
“Even when it comes to Blair?”
I frowned. Maize was the youngest of all of us when Blair got betrothed to Lugh, but even she wasn’t blind. Sometimes I think that even our parents had seen what was happening, and for some reason, they had been against it.
“Even that,” I said between gritted teeth. I raked my brain for some other safer subject, and found one. “Who’s the young fae? The one who was in the courtyard with you?”
“Oh, Willow,” Maize said. “Remember King Varian of the Summer Court and Layla were stuck in that nameless realm? She was there too. After Varian and Layla came back, they went there again to rescue Willow. Varian contacted us, so we could help find Willow’s family. We’ve brought her here, but so far, we have had no luck finding her family.”
I remembered how close she was to my mother, and how she held Maize’s hand. “But it seems she found one already.”
A small smile spread over Maize’s lips. “Well, I’ll be honest. Yes, I want her to find her family, but I don’t want her to leave us. I’m growing fond of her. And mother is too.” I nodded. Though I didn’t know Willow, I could see she had brought some light and happiness to this household.
“Where’s Willow now?”
“I don’t like her seeing mother this way,” Maize said, her voice grim. “Willow suffered a lot already, and I can feel how seeing mother unraveling distresses her. I sent her to her bedroom with her handmaid. Hopefully, mother will be fine by suppertime.” She paused.
“You’re doing good, Maize.” The words tumbled out of my mouth before I even thought of them. But it was true. My little sister was surprising me.
Perhaps Mahaeru was wrong. The title didn’t have to be mine. Perhaps Maize would be a good queen.
My sister straightened, her eyes falling on the sword hanging by my waist. “Are you leaving soon?”
“As soon as I say goodbye to you two, and get my things ready.” I sat down on the mattress beside my mother and touched her hand. “Mother?”
Slowly, she turned her head to me. Her eyes rounded when she saw me. “Redlen, you’re here!”
I forced a smile. “Yes, Mother, I am.”
“I missed you so much,” she said, turning her hand so it would fit in mine. “Have you seen Lugh yet? I’m sure he’ll love to know you’re here.”
“I—” I swallowed hard. “I’ll talk to him later.”
Maize sniffed and turned away, hiding new tears.
“Good, good.” My mother patted my hand with her frail one. “I’ll ask Libra to inform the cook we’ll have a special banquet tonight. To celebrate we’re all together again.”
“That would be great,” I said, going along with her. Arguing about the reality would only bring more stress and shock to her.
Maize turned and took mother’s hand from mine. “Mother, Redlen is busy with army matters. He needs to go now, but he’ll be back soon.”
“Oh, of course,” my mother said. “I’ll let you go. I’ll even lie down here a little.” She pulled one of the pillows from her back, and Maize helped her down. “I’m tired. I’ll nap until the time for the banquet.”
She had certainly lost it. “Sure, Mother,” I said, my voice heavy with agony. Maize glanced at me and I mouthed, “Thank you.” She dipped her chin once, then returned her attention to our mother.
The queen wasn’t this bad when I first left the Autumn Court. It broke my heart to see how far she had fallen, and the reality that she might never recover.
Wishing I could do more, wishing I could fix everything, I turned and marched out of my mother’s chambers.
There was one thing I could do now: kill some rusting sea elves.
6
Blair
I watched as Red marched out of the courtyard. Lennox and General Barric promptly followed him, while Sage and Jora stayed back, watching me. Jora’s eyes met mine, pity stamped on her face, before she lowered her gaze.
Though I didn’t share half of my thoughts with her, she knew my true feelings. Despite trying to maintain my composure, I was disconcerted. My poor heart beat fast, in a way that scared me. I hadn’t seen Red in years, and his effect on me hadn’t lessened. In fact, it had increased.
He had grown; he was a couple of inches taller, his shoulders were broader, his arms were thicker. His leather armor accented every curve and dip of his hard body. His hazel eyes gleamed golden, and his hair, seemingly black in the shade, shone a dark red in the faint light of the sun. Short stubble covered his proud chin and sharp jawline.
Autumn Rebel Page 4