by Lylah James
I flinched, my eyes squeezing shut for a second with sorrow. Those words were the same words I had hurled at Alessio in my attempt to hurt him.
“The boy long ago lost hope to find to his Angel. He thought it was a stupid idea. He refused to believe in Angels, for he believed that a monster can never have an Angel. And he was a monster.” His voice was low and gruff, almost pained.
Never once did he stop touching me while talking. And I never let go of him.
“Alessio, no.” I shook my head, trying to stop his agonizing story.
But it was impossible to stop him once he had started. He softly continued to caress my cheeks.
“But then everything changed when he found a broken girl hiding under his bed. She was dirty and so damn scared of him. But he was instantly taken by her. There was something about her that called to him and made him…feel. He hated it. He loathed the idea of feeling. He pushed until he couldn’t push anymore. He couldn’t deny the truth anymore.”
While speaking, he placed another kiss on the tip of my nose and then continued with his tale, this time taking away my breath yet again. Tears sprung in my eyes, and one single drop slid down the corner and disappeared into my hair, leaving a wet trail.
“She was the sweetest, the kindest, and so gentle. So beautiful that he couldn’t take his eyes off her. She was the true definition of beauty—inside and out. She was love, while he was hatred. She was kind while he was unlovable. She was sweet and gentle while he killed in cold blood and felt no remorse. She was light while he was darkness. He realized that he’d found his Angel. He couldn’t deny it any longer. Because he needed her. He couldn’t live without her. He didn’t want to imagine a world where she wasn’t in it.”
Alessio paused for what felt like the longest time, leaving the words hanging around us, our eyes connected together. We breathed together, our heart racing in unison.
Another tear spilled from my eye and ran down my cheek. Alessio caught it quickly with his lips, kissing it away. When another fell down my face, he did the same thing. Closing my eyes, I hiccupped back a sob.
“That little boy was me, Ayla,” Alessio whispered in my ear, his breath tickling me there. “And the broken girl he found under his bed, his Angel, she is you. You are my Angel.”
“I—” I started but then quickly snapped my mouth shut. I didn’t know what to say. His confession had truly left me with a mix of emotions.
I felt light, almost as if I was floating. My heart was beating as fast as the wings of a hummingbird, and it hummed just like a hummingbird. It sang with happiness and so much…love. I was filled with pure elation.
Alessio’s lips lingered on my cheeks before he slightly pulled away, looking down at me with his beautiful blue eyes. His expression was soft yet determined. “You are right. I did touch Sasha.”
I blinked away tears, my fingers digging into his shoulders painfully. He didn’t wince, not that I expected him to.
He instantly noticed my change in demeanor. He soothed me, caressing my cheeks yet again. “I touched her, but I didn’t kiss her. I touched her, but I didn’t fuck her. I didn’t do anything with Sasha.”
I only blinked up at him, confused and feeling slightly bewildered. “I’ll be blunt and honest. Yes, I was so close to fucking her. Yes, I had ripped her panties and had her bent over my desk, but no, I didn’t fuck her. I couldn’t, Ayla. You were all I could think about. You. Every single minute. All I could see were your eyes, beautiful smiles, serene expression as you played the piano and walked to the creek. All I could hear were your laughter and sweet voice.”
Alessio dragged in a harsh, deep breath before releasing it with a tired sigh. His expression was haggard, his voice filled with uncertainty and so much grief that my heart ached. It ached for his pain. “I was mad. At my father and at everything. My feelings. My weakness for you. And I was so scared. My mother died because my father loved her. An angel living in the world of the devils, and in the end, she got killed because of it. I am so fucking scared that I’ll lose you too. The mere thought of losing you drives me insane.”
“I didn’t do anything with Sasha,” he said again, his voice almost filled with ferocity as he willed me to believe him with his eyes. They begged me to see the truth. “Tell me you believe me, Ayla.”
My hands left his shoulders, but instead of pulling away, I palmed his cheeks. “I believe you,” I whispered.
I truly did. His words and face spoke honesty. It was right there for me to believe. Not once was I filled with doubt when he said he didn’t touch Sasha. If I had doubts before, it was now erased.
“I believe you, Alessio,” I said again, my fingers pressing gently into his cheeks. Alessio shuddered in relief atop of me, his eyes closing as he finally relaxed in my hold.
We stayed like that for a few seconds, with me soothing him. When he opened his eyes again, this time the blueish orbs were glistening with intensity. “The plan was to get close to you to find out if you were a traitor,” he started.
Flinching, I started to let go, but he quickly grasped my hands, holding them firmly to his cheeks.
“But it was just an excuse,” he quickly added. “I was using it as an excuse to get close to you. From the very first time I saw you, I had this urge to be close to you. To hold you. But it was a show of weakness. So I tried to find every excuse to get close to you. The plan ended the same day it was made, because no matter what, I couldn’t lie to myself. I kept telling myself it was what I had to do for the safety of everyone, but deep inside, I knew I was doing it for myself. I needed you, since the very beginning.” He looked in her eyes.
“I messed up,” Alessio breathed sadly. “I know I did, but I’m asking you to forgive me. To give me another chance to prove myself. Please let me in your heart again. Give me this chance and I’ll never let you go again. I’ll never break you again.”
He paused and took a deep breath before continuing in the same soft voice. “I’ll never be the man you deserve, but I’ll be the man you need. I’ll be the man who makes you laugh and smile, the one who drives away all your nightmares, the one who kisses you good morning and good night and so many kisses in between. I’ll be your savior. Now and for the rest of my life.”
Tears sprung in my eyes at his confession, and I gave him a wobbly smile. “You definitely do have a way with words,” I replied.
Alessio let out a small laugh and shook his head, his lips lifting up in a small smile. “Only for you, Angel.”
My eyes widened as he called me Angel, the tears falling before I could stop them. “You are making me cry,” I muttered as Alessio swiped the tears away.
“Are they happy tears?” he asked, looking a bit uncertain.
I nodded, speechless, and he gifted me with one of his breathtaking smiles. “Good. From now on, the only tears you will cry will be happy tears.”
“You’re sweet.”
Alessio looked affronted by my admission and sent me a mock glare. I couldn’t help but laugh. It looked like the Mafia Boss didn’t like being called sweet, although he really was…sweet.
“I’m a killer, Ayla. Definitely not sweet,” he said, looking deep into my eyes.
Smiling, I leaned up and placed a kiss on his nose like he had done to me. “You might be a killer out there, a monster, as you said, but in here,” I pressed my hand over his heart, “in here, you are sweet. To me, you are sweet.”
Another breathtaking smile from Alessio. This time the smile lit up his face and eyes with such happiness that it made my heart ache…in a good way. It fluttered, and I melted into his embrace.
Finally, the pain that I had seen before was no longer there. He looked hopeful.
Taking a deep breath, Alessio continued. “When I’m with you, it feels as if I can finally breathe. I have been living in the darkness for so long, but you bring me light and peace. You make me laugh and smile, something I haven’t done in so damn long. When I’m away from you, I feel empty, like I’m missing a piece of m
yself. I don’t ever want to be without you, Angel. I don’t think I’ll survive it. When I’m with you, it feels like I’m the king of the world. I can accomplish anything with you by my side. I used to believe that you are my weakness. You are. You will always be my weakness, but you are also my strength.”
Oh wow. Wow. My throat tightened up at his confession until it felt impossible to breathe. “Alessio,” I murmured, a constant smile on my lips.
“I don’t know what love is,” Alessio mumbled, brushing his lips against mine in the lightest kiss. “But if what I feel for you is love, then so be it.”
“I don’t know what love is either,” I admitted, my fingers softly moving over his cheeks and then his lips.
Kissing me again on the lips with the slightest pressure, as if he was scared to break me, Alessio smiled. “We’ll learn it together then, Angel.”
Angel. I didn’t think I would ever get tired of Alessio calling me that.
“You called me Angel once. When I had my breakdown,” I murmured.
Alessio smiled. “Yes. I always knew you were my Angel, but I was too stubborn to admit it.”
It didn’t matter anymore if he was stubborn or not.
“You are my Angel.”
Yes, I was. I was his. I was his Angel.
And he was mine. My Made Man. My monster. Whoever he was, whether he was the killer or the sweet man he was with me, I accepted him.
I breathed him in. Closing my eyes, I let my senses take over, feeling Alessio, savoring his touch and voice. I couldn’t live without him. This beautiful broken man had given me his heart, and in return, I had laid mine in his palms.
We were two broken hearts. Two broken halves making a whole.
“I can’t promise you everything will be perfect.” My eyes snapped open at Alessio’s voice, and I waited for him to continue. “My life is not perfect. The world is fucked up and dangerous. Life is not going to be rosy. But I can promise to make it as perfect as I can. All I know is that I need you. This makes me a selfish man, Ayla. I should let you go. You would be better off without me, but I’m selfish when it comes to you.”
My fingers went to his lips to silence him. “It’s okay. That’s all I needed to hear, Alessio. I can’t live without you, either. This is enough for me. It’s more than enough. I don’t need or want anything else. I just want you.”
Before I could say anything else, Alessio had me crushed to his chest, hugging me so tight. My ribs felt like they were about to break. “Can’t breathe,” I squeaked, but I still wrapped my arms around him, returning the hug just as fiercely.
He kissed the top of my forehead, his lips lingering there. “You are my Angel.”
There it was. Those words again.
I sighed in contentment. I love you was needed. We were more than that. The words that Alessio had whispered to me meant more than those common three words.
You are my Angel. These held more power.
“And you are the man who brings me peace.” I whispered the words ever so softly. “The man who makes my heart flutter and fills my stomach with butterflies. Just one look from you, a simple word, just one sweet kiss, or one soft caress, it is enough to make me the happiest woman. You are my strength, Alessio.”
His arms tightened around me, and I smiled. Oh yes, my words had the same effect on him as his words had on me.
Alessio was a man of few words, yet he was able to say so much to me. I wished I had more to say. I wished I had more words to show what my heart…what I truly felt. But I didn’t.
I’d rather just show him. Bringing his lips to mine, I kissed him. Softly and gently. The kiss wasn’t fast or hard. It was sweet and slow. We took our time, our lips moving in sync, and we savored each other. Alessio let me lead the kiss. He didn’t push for more. He let me kiss him. So I did, for the longest time.
Our tongues mated together in a slow, sweet loving. We kissed until we were breathless. And when we pulled apart, my heart felt like it had been restored. By the look Alessio was giving me, I could tell he felt the same.
My lips still tingled from the kiss. I could still feel him there, and a dreamy smile spread across my lips.
“I dreamed of you before you came into my life. When I was still a little boy, I dreamed of you. Black hair and green eyes, with a beautiful smile,” Alessio said gruffly, his voice tight with emotions.
I stuttered, and he smiled. “You were always meant for me, Ayla.”
“I was.” I nodded in agreement. “I just wished I had found you sooner, Alessio. Then you wouldn’t have needed to wait for me for so long.”
“It doesn’t matter. You found me now, and I’m never letting you go.”
“I don’t want you to ever let me go. Even if you tried, I’ll just come back,” I teased, although the words spoken rang with the truth.
“Good.” This time, it was Alessio who took my lips.
The kiss wasn’t sweet as before. He devoured me. He kissed me a like a madman. Like an animal craving for his mate. He took my lips deeply and possessively. Alessio kissed me with all he had.
His tongue shoved past my lips, kissing me with a frenzied desperation. I moaned against his lips, my hands going to his hair, my fingers tightening. He nipped at my bottom lip, and I leaned more into his kiss, demanding more.
When he pulled away, I could feel his pounding heart against mine. Alessio stared down at me with soft eyes, although the lust was blazing there with ferocious intensity. I trembled in anticipation for him.
“Do you forgive me?” he asked, his voice rough with desire.
Smiling, I combed my fingers through his hair, gently grazing my nails on the back of his neck, just the way he loved it. “I do. I had already forgiven you before you even dragged me here. Actually, I was coming up to talk to you but you beat me to it.”
“Yeah?” he asked, his eyes roaming over my face and then staring into mine deeply, looking for confirmation.
“Yes, Alessio,” I nodded. “I forgive you.”
And then his lips crashed to mine again. Giving me a hard, bruising kiss, he left me breathless. When he pulled away, I groaned a little. I could feel his hard on between my parted thighs.
I was turned on. I needed him. I forgave him.
“I forgive you, but I’m still a little mad that you touched Sasha,” I mumbled as his lips started to descend toward mine again.
Alessio froze, his lips mere inches from mine. “I know,” he mumbled back.
And then there it was. That smirk I loved so much. The corner of his lips tilted up just a little, and I had to suppress my moan.
Before I could say anything else, he rolled us over quickly, eliciting a shocked gasp from me. Alessio laid on his back, his head on his pillow as I straddled him, my knees on either side of his hips.
Alessio gifted me with his perfect smirk before slightly pushing upward and rolling his hips against mine. This time a moan escaped past my lips unashamedly when his hard cock pressed into me.
“I know,” he said again.
And then another roll of his hips.
He teased me, his rigid length rubbing deliciously against my covered crotch. Even through his slacks and my panties, I felt him. Hard, warm and ready.
“You can give me any punishment you want,” Alessio replied gruffly. I stared down at him through hazy eyes, and he sent me a wink, raising an eyebrow in suggestion.
Alessio slowly moved the hem of my dress upward, his fingers moving over my bare thighs. He drove me crazy with his teasing touch. When I finally got what he meant, I let out a small laugh.
He was impossible. Insatiable.
I hummed, giving my hips a tentative roll. Alessio groaned, slightly bucking upward. My hands went between us, and I cupped him through his slacks.
“Fuck,” he hissed.
I gave him a small squeeze, teasing him in return. I almost let out another moan at the feel of him, the hardness of him, pressing into my palm. I rubbed him over his pants, my hazy eyes on his lust
ful ones.
“Any punishment? Anything I want?” I asked, continuing my slow teasing touch.
“Yeah,” he groaned. “Anything.”
Leaning forward until my face was inches above his, our lips almost touching, I whispered, my voice coming out huskily. “Anything?”
“Anything, kitten,” he readily agreed, rolling his hips upward again, pressing into my palm.
Smiling, I gave him a quick kiss on the lips and then leaned back. Letting go of his cock, I raised an eyebrow of my own.
“Fine. You can’t touch me for three days.”
Alessio’s eyes widened as he froze, his mouth falling open in shock. “What?” he sputtered. Before he could stop me, I rolled off him and quickly got out of the bed.
He sat up, still staring at me in complete bafflement. “You heard me. You can’t touch me for three days.”
“No,” Alessio snapped. “We are not doing this. One fucking week of being away from you, not touching you. And now another three days? No. Fucking. Way.”
“Yes,” I replied back calmly. “That’s your punishment.”
Rubbing a hand over his face in frustration, he growled. “I had another type of punishment in mind.”
Oh yeah, he definitely did. I wouldn’t have minded either, but this time, it was my turn to tease him. I was going to enjoy it.
Alessio stared blankly at me for a few seconds before he smirked, his eyes turning dark with lust again. “Kitten,” he said huskily.
Oh no. No. I knew what he was doing.
I took a step away from the bed as he got off, stalking toward me. “No, Alessio.”
“I know you want me,” he continued, his hand going down to cup himself. He was still hard.
I was in trouble. I couldn’t deny him, especially when he was like this.
Placing a hand out, I tried to glare, although I could already feel myself growing wet. Ah! Get yourself together, Ayla.
“No. Stay,” I ordered.
He paused, cocking his head to the side. “I’m not a dog, Ayla.”
“Your sexy voice and sinfully delicious, beautiful body is not going to work on me this time,” I muttered. I meant it to be low, but he heard the words.