by Lylah James
With a sigh, I started to get out of the bed. “I should go to my room,” I suggested quietly.
Alessio’s eyes widened, and he snapped, “No.”
He pointed at the bed, glaring at me in the process. “Get back in there,” he ordered. “I’d rather have you in the same room and not touch you than have you in the other room, so far away from me.”
“Alessio—” I started but never got a chance to explain before he cut me off.
“No. There is no my room or yours. This bed is as much yours as it is mine. It’s ours. This is your room now. Got it?” he replied, his words punctuated as if he wanted me to understand and never doubt what he was saying. “So get that pretty ass of yours back in bed and go to sleep.”
I lost the fight and sat on the edge of the bed, still feeling a little guilty. My eyes were cast down, but I heard Alessio’s audible sigh, and he quickly approached the bed. He stopped in front of me, and I stared at his feet.
When his hands came to rest on the mattress, on either side of my hips, caging me in, I had no choice but to look up in his eyes. “Stop thinking so hard, Angel,” he soothed quietly.
Angel. My heart melted at the word, and I smiled. Alessio leaned forward, his forehead just mere inches from mine, but we didn’t touch. We were so close, yet not touching. All I had to do was lean the slightest bit forward and we would be touching.
But neither of us moved.
“Good night,” he whispered.
“Good night,” I replied just as softly.
He still didn’t move, and neither did I. And when he finally did, I could see the disappointment in his eyes, and I felt my own, my chest aching as he stepped away.
That small moment between us had lasted shorter than we wanted.
“I want to kiss you so bad right now, Ayla,” he confessed. His words sent a shiver down my body. I wanted that, too. But we both knew we couldn’t just simply kiss. It would lead to more, and we wouldn’t be able to stop ourselves.
“But I’ll wait. For you, I will wait.”
He was perfect and said the sweetest words. It was hard to resist him.
I could feel myself slipping, forgetting about his punishment. I could feel myself reaching for him, but he was already stepping away. “Go to sleep, Angel.”
Nodding, I laid down under the covers as he turned off the lights, only the lamp beside me casting a soft glow around the room. I faced the couch and saw Alessio lying down, crossing his arms over his chest. In the dark, I couldn’t see if his eyes were closed or not.
Maybe he was too big for the couch. He really was. The couch appeared dainty with Alessio laid down on it.
I burrowed deeper under the comforter and pressed myself into the soft mattress, willing myself to stop worrying and just sleep.
Hours later, I was still not asleep. I glanced at Alessio and wondered if he was already asleep. Without thinking much about it, I quietly got out of bed, making my way to Alessio.
My feet stopped in front of him to see his eyes closed, his face calm with sleep. He was so beautiful like this. When I looked at Alessio, I didn’t see the cruel man, the killer or the monster. All I saw was him, the man who called me Angel. I saw the real him.
I pulled the bed sheet over his body, my heart accelerating just a little bit. I hoped he wouldn’t wake up. When he didn’t, my hands moved to his head, my fingers lightly brushing his forehead as I pushed the strands of hair away.
I caressed him, almost soothingly, wishing he was awake to feel my touch.
“I thought we weren’t supposed to touch.”
At his voice, I snatched my hand away. Alessio cracked one eye open, sending me a smirk of his own. Scoffing at his teasing look, I crossed my arms over my chest. “You were awake this whole time?”
“Yes,” he replied, looking down at the bed sheet covering his body.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” I mumbled under my breath.
“And miss the opportunity of you touching me?” he shot back.
“Well, that’s cheating,” I replied.
“You are the one who touched me.” He raised an eyebrow before shutting his eyes again.
“Go to sleep.” This time it was me ordering him around. His chest rumbled with a low laughter, and I smiled back. Two days. We could do this.
With renewed confidence, I got back in bed. As soon as my head hit the pillow, I closed my eyes and waited for sleep to come.
It was dark. Raining and foggy. My body quaked with each harsh shudder. The wind blew violently around me. It was dark. So dark. Why was it dark? Where was I?
I couldn’t see anything. Just darkness. Were my eyes closed? I tried to open them…but they were already open.
Help. I tried to shout, but no words came out.
And then I heard his voice. His sinister voice. My skin crawled, my back stiffened, and a shiver ran down my spine.
No. No. I wanted to scream.
I now understood why it was only darkness. I was back in hell. He got me. The devil had me and wouldn’t let me go this time.
I wanted to scream again, but my voice was gone.
“Did you really think you could escape?”
His voice was right next to my ear, but I couldn’t see anything. I only felt him. A small part of me died as I felt his breath on my neck.
“I will always find you.”
I recoiled from him, but his hand clamped down painfully on my arms, and I screamed. This time, I heard it. My voice came out hoarse, and my scream rang through my ears.
“Scream. Scream all you want. Nobody will save you this time. Not even him.”
Not even him.
Alessio. No. Alessio, where are you? I wanted to scream, but my voice was gone again.
And then I saw him. Even through the darkness, I saw him. He was walking toward me. My savior. My peace. He was here. He would save me. He would save me from the devil and this nightmare.
But all I saw was rage in his eyes. They glowed with it. So much anger. So much hatred.
I gasped when I realized it was all directed at me. I tried to shake my head, tried to explain, but I was numb.
He stopped in front of me, his big body looming dangerously over mine. Instead of feeling safe, all I felt was fear. I could feel all his fury and hatred for me. They were vibrating off his body, letting me know exactly how he felt.
I betrayed him. And now I had to pay the price.
“I hate you.” He hissed the words, shattering my heart in a thousand pieces. “You deserve what you got. Your soul belongs to the devil.”
No. No. No. Please. Believe me.
He was walking away. Away from me, leaving me behind with the devil.
No, come back. Please come back. Don’t leave me.
He started to fade away. I screamed and screamed, but no sound was made. Only the laughter of the devil could be heard.
“I hate you.” Those words resonated in my ears.
“She is yours,” he said to the devil. No! I’m yours! Only yours. Please come back.
“Never show your face to me again. You are dead to me.”
I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Please. Please.
Then he was gone, fading away into the dark, leaving me behind with the devil who tortured my mind, body, and soul. I shattered as I lost sight of my savior.
“NO!”
I shot up in bed, my body drenched in sweat. My ears rung with my screams. The light was instantly on, and Alessio was by my side in a matter of seconds, but I flinched away.
All I could see was him walking away from me, fading in the darkness and leaving me behind. No.
Lurching forward in bed, I wrapped my arms around his neck, holding him tight to me. My hold was unyielding. I refused to let him go. He quickly wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me onto his lap, holding me just as tight.
“Don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me. Don’t ever leave me. I can’t. Please. Don’t leave me, Alessio,” I mumbled in his chest, my heart ra
cing at the thought of being without him. My body was shaking with silent tremors, and I trembled in his arms.
Tears ran down my cheeks in an endless flow. I continued to beg him.
“Shhh…I’m here. I’m not leaving. I’m right here, Angel.”
His words were soothing, but the fear inside me wouldn’t subdue. Alessio continued to soothe me as I cried in his chest. He never let go of me, his arms remaining tight around me. I felt his fingers softly caressing my hips.
“I’m not leaving. I will never leave you. Don’t cry, Angel. I can’t bear your tears. I’m right here. I got you,” Alessio continued sweetly in my ears, willing me to believe him.
I wished I could. I wanted to believe him. It was just a dream, just a nightmare I tried to convince myself.
But was it really? Maybe it was just showing the truth, my reality when Alessio learned the truth.
After all, he hated me. The real me. He hated the Abandonatos, and no matter how much I wished it wasn’t my reality, it was…and I was his enemy.
My fingers tightened around his neck at the thought of losing him. My guilt tasted bitter. My heart ached, and my mind felt numb. I wanted to forget. I just wanted to live in this happy bubble with Alessio, but for how long?
My tears eventually stopped, my sobbing turning into small hiccups. Alessio’s soothing words finally penetrated through my foggy mind, and I went limp against him. We were still holding each other, refusing to let go.
I couldn’t even if I tried. It felt like if I let him go, I would crumble to pieces.
“Please don’t leave me,” I whispered one final time.
“I won’t,” he vowed.
“Promise me.”
“I promise you, Angel.”
“You said you don’t break your promises.” My voice was muffled as I buried my face in his hard chest.
“And I don’t. I will never break my promise to you, Ayla. I’m yours as much as you are mine. I’m never letting you go,” he soothed in my hair, placing a kiss on the top of my head.
His words were what I wanted to hear. They were more than I wanted. Except whatever promises he made to me, they would mean nothing if he learned my truth.
But I still made him promise. It was selfish of me. Maybe…just maybe, if he made this promise, he wouldn’t leave me?
Alessio was the type of man who would never break his vow, no matter what. So I tried to bind him to me in any way possible.
My hands went to his chest, one place right over his heart. I felt its beat against my palm. It was racing just as hard as mine.
He was worried. Scared even.
My fingers softly caressed his chest as I took a deep breath and confessed one thing.
“My name is not Ayla Blinov.”
They were the hardest words ever spoken by me. It broke a little piece of my heart. In that moment, I wished I was Ayla Blinov. Not an Abandonato.
I wasn’t ready to lose him yet. But I could confess something. Anything. One step at a time.
But his next words took me by surprise.
“I know.”
My head snapped up, and I stared at him, fear slithering down my spine. His face was almost unreadable, but his eyes were soft, regarding me as if I was someone precious.
“You know?” I sputtered.
“I made a background check the very first day you came here,” he simply replied. “And got nothing. We searched up every single Ayla in the country. Even did some background checks on names that sounded similar to yours. But still got nothing. It was like you never existed. So I knew you were lying about your name.”
“You knew I was lying this whole time?” I asked, completely astonished at this new revelation.
“Yes.” A simple word, one syllable, but it was enough to tilt my world upside down.
“But why? Why did you let me stay?”
“I was curious at first but then realized that I couldn’t let you go. It didn’t matter that you were lying to me anymore. Sometimes, I forget that you are even lying,” he explained quietly.
“But what if I had turned out to be the spy? Or the enemy?” I choked on the words, my throat closing up as I suddenly felt nauseous. “What would you have done?”
Alessio stared at me for a second, his bluish eyes penetrating into my soul. “I would have had to kill you.”
Bringing my hand to my mouth to stop the sudden cry, I buried my face into his chest again. “I’m not your enemy,” I whispered.
“I know,” he replied just as softly. His hands were caressing my arms, and I melted into his embrace.
“Why are you lying, Ayla? Is Ayla even your name?” Alessio asked suddenly.
“Yes, Ayla is my name. I didn’t lie about that.”
“Then why did you lie about your last name? What are you trying to hide?” He pushed for more. “Are you in danger? Is someone after you?”
I gave him a stiff nod. Just one simple nod, and then we fell silent. Alessio didn’t ask anything else. I knew he was waiting for me to reply.
“The man I am to be married to.”
I whispered them, and Alessio froze, his body tensing, his arms tightening around me like bands of steel. “What?” he asked, his voice calm and low, but I knew he was feeling anything but calm.
I knew when he spoke in this tone he was at his angriest.
“He wants me, Alessio. It doesn’t matter that I ran away; he will never rest until he finds me, dead or alive.” Taking a deep breath, I sniffled, trying to keep my tears at bay. “I’m his obsession, his prize possession, and he will not stop looking for me until I’m in his bed again.”
Alessio’s fingers dug into my hips, and I winced. “Who is he?”
I shook my head. “Ayla, who is he?” he asked, his voice deadly.
“No.”
“Damn it!” he growled. “Why are you protecting him?”
My head snapped up, and I shook my head wildly. “No! I’m protecting you! And me. He is a dangerous man, Alessio. A mad man.”
His eyes turned into slits. “More dangerous than me?”
“I don’t know,” I answered honestly. I knew Alberto was obsessed with me, but to what extent he would go, I didn’t know.
“He is a dead man, Ayla,” he vowed. “Tell me his name.”
The fury in his eyes was unmistakable. But it wasn’t at me. It was for me. It was directed at the man who had hurt me.
I stayed quiet. I thought he would snap, but he didn’t. Instead, he leaned his forehead on mine. “Why are you so stubborn?”
“Because I want to stay alive. I want to live with you. And I don’t want to lose you.”
“Angel,” he murmured. “You are not going to lose me.”
“I might be lying about my name, about who I am, but that is the only thing I am lying about. What I feel for you is the truth,” I confessed, hoping that when the time came, he would remember those words.
“Will you ever tell me the truth?” Alessio questioned.
I wish I never have to tell you the truth, Alessio. For the truth will break you. And I can’t bear to break your heart. But I have to. One day, I will have to tell you. And that day might be the day I lose everything.
“I will. When I’m ready. Right now, I want to forget. I don’t want to live in the past.”
Understanding flashed in his eyes, and he sighed. “I will protect you, Angel.” There it was. Another vow.
I didn’t say anything else. Laying my head on his shoulder, I breathed out a sigh, letting my body relax in his embrace. Alessio laid us down on the bed and pulled the cover on top of our bodies. Not once did he let me go.
“I know I’m not supposed to touch you, but we both know we can’t sleep without each other. I will hold you tonight, and tomorrow, I will keep my promise,” Alessio said in my ear before placing a kiss there.
One of his arms was wrapped around my stomach, my back to his front. He held me tightly, cocooning me into his body. I placed my hand over his and closed my eyes. “I
know you will keep your promise.”
“Sleep, Angel. I will watch over you.”
Holding his promise to my heart, I let sleep take over me. This time I was filled with peace. After all, I was in the arms of my savior.
Chapter 20
I glided around the room, moving to the rhythm of the song as I folded Alessio’s clothes. I hummed along, my body light.
It had been two days since my nightmare. Alessio and I didn’t talk about it again. He never pushed for more or asked more questions. He was giving me the time I needed, and I was forever thankful for that.
I should be counting my days. I should tell the truth. But soon, I would.
I just wanted to live this moment for a little while longer before I left my life in the hands of fate.
Once I gave Alessio my truth, he would be the judge, jury, and the executioner. I would have no choice but to accept his decision, even if it meant my death.
I just wanted to bask in this happiness for a little while longer. Maybe I was a horrible person for that.
I didn’t know…but I didn’t care, either. I just wanted to continue being happy.
After folding the last of Alessio’s clothes, I quickly tied my hair in a ponytail. Smiling, I thought about Alessio pulling it down again.
It had been two days. Alessio’s punishment was over. He would be coming for me soon. Anticipation and desire licked its way through my body, and I quivered, pressing my thighs together.
I was about to step away from the bed when I noticed my book on the floor. Shaking my head, I bent down, my fingers grasping the book.
I went to stand up. My back was almost straightened, but I never got a chance.
A hard body wrapped around me. I let out a scream, and a hand covered my mouth, muffling me. I struggled as tears stung my eyes, but the strong body kept me in place.
Fear slithered its way into my body, and my mind started to race, my heart pounding. I was pushed forward, and I fell onto the bed, my eyes closing on the impact.
My body was flipped around so that I was on my back, and the body settled over mine. I squeezed my eyes shut, refusing to look at the man.
What if the devil had found me?