‘So what does Daniel say about this little bird fluttering?’
‘He doesn’t know. I don’t want to worry him, Cat. Havin’ a baby is the most normal thing in the world an’ he’s enough worry on his shoulders with his mother. I don’t want to bother him.’
‘Mary, I think ye should tell Daniel. He’s a doctor and maybe he can put yer mind at rest. Ye have to see if it’s normal or not. I don’t think I ever experienced anythin’ like this, but if ye tell him and he says ’tis normal, then normal it is. Promise me ye’ll tell him when he comes home.’
Mary looked at her wide-eyed. ‘Ye’re frightenin’ me now, Cat.’
‘Ah, c’mon Mary. Ye’ll do fine. But ye have to check this out. I think ye should go on up to bed and rest for the afternoon now.’
‘But ye’ve only just arrived.’
‘Don’t worry. I’ll be here for a bit. I’m on a little holiday.’
‘Oh that’s nice, Cat. Is Louis with ye?
‘No.’ Cat looked away.
‘Is he comin’ over soon?’
‘I don’t know exactly.’ She continued to avert her face, staring out of the window, but her eyes filled with tears.
Mary reached over to her and placed her hand on Cat’s and gave it a squeeze.
‘Ah Cat. Ye’ve not fallen out have ye?’
Unable to answer, Cat continued to stare out of the window. Then she saw Billy and Marie having a tussle on the lawn so she jumped up quickly without answering and rushed outside to break up the fight. She scolded Billy but he said Marie had started it by taking a biscuit.
Cat drew Marie onto her lap and realised that in the few months since she’d left her in Ireland she had grown almost as big as Billy. Something worried Cat though - she was aware there was strangeness between her and the child. She felt that this wasn’t the child she had given birth to, and that Marie ranged somewhere in her affection equivalent to a niece.
It was a strange experience and Cat couldn’t work out why she should feel this way towards her daughter. Eileen now felt far more like her own child than Marie. She put her down and, satisfied the children had resolved their quarrel, returned to Mary’s lounge.
‘Little devils, ye can’t take yer eyes off them can ye?’ She stared at Mary and thought she looked a lot better; her colour was normal and her lips were no longer blue. ‘Mary, are ye goin’ on up to bed to rest now?’
‘Yes I s’ppose so. But, Cat. I asked ye a question and ye haven’t answered me yet. I’ll go once ye’ve answered me.’
Cat looked at her, ‘Ye want to know whether Louis and I have quarrelled? Well, I don’t want this to be general knowledge, Mary. If I tell ye in confidence, promise ye’ll not say a word to Mummy, Dada, or anyone?’
‘Of course, Cat. Ye know I’ll not say a word to anyone, not even Daniel. How’s that?’
Cat told Mary about the job situation, how they sacked men for the sake of a penny; the constant threat of no food and no money; Louis’ pride in not asking his mother for a job in her shop; and how she had found him begging in the street.
But the biggest thorn in her flesh had been the fact he had lied to her.
‘Wasn’t it,’ she asked Mary, ‘the most important thing between husband and wife that they could trust each other, and have complete honesty?’
Mary listened without comment until Cat had finished speaking.
‘Cat, we’re none of us perfect. If we were to go through life without doin’ one single thing wrong, then we’d all be saints, not sinners.’ She leaned forward and plumped up the cushion behind her. ‘Soften yer heart towards him Cat, he’s a good man, and he’s the one ye chose to spend yer life with, isn’t he?’
Cat nodded.
‘It sounds to me as though he was doin’ nothin’ more than tryin’ to put food in yer mouths, without ye knowin’ where the money came from. Is that so wrong?’
‘But he lied to me Mary. He told such a fantastic lie about the evenin’ suit. How could he?’
Mary reached out and took Cat’s hand.
‘Judge not, that ye be judged, Our Lord said Cat. C’mon now, why not write to him and ask him to come on over? We’ll have a grand time. The harvest is nearly ready to get in. Maybe he can help Tom and Dada and at the same time get back some of his self-respect. Ye know a man likes to feel he’s providin’ for his family, however he does it.’ Mary watched Cat’s shoulders slacken and continued. ‘Cat, don’t put off until tomorrow, what could be done today. None of us know what life has in store for us and it’s a waste of precious time holdin’ on to anger. Ask yerself what ye’d have felt if he hadn’t come back from the war!’
Cat looked down and fidgeted with the lace on her blouse as tears slid unchecked down her face.
‘Ye’ll forgive him won’t ye Cat?’
Cat sat thinking about it, wrestling with her anger and hurt.
‘C’mon Cat, ye know ye’re head over heels in love with the man.’
‘Ye’re an old sage now aren’t ye?’ she said smiling at Mary. ‘I’ll write to him. Thanks a million, Mary. I’ll tell Louis the reunion is down to you.’
‘Ah well, ye know the old saying, May the roof over yer house never fall in and may those beneath it never fall out. Life’s too short, Cat, and we never know what’s around the corner.’
Mary paused as though remembering something and then continued. ‘Cat, I have somethin’ for ye and Louis. It was for yer wedding anniversary, but why wait? I’d’ve posted it but since ye’re here, well, go over to the drawer there, it’s wrapped in tissue paper.’
Cat went to the drawer, opened it and lifted out the package wrapped in tissue paper. She crossed the room and handed it to Mary. ‘Is this what you mean?’
‘Yes thanks, ’tis.’ Mary looked at her. ‘Now, I’ve two rosaries here. One is for ye and the other for Louis, but I want ye to have the pick. Ye choose Cat, either the red one or the white, I don’t mind which.’
Cat unfolded the tissue, took the rosaries out and held them up, looking from one to the other. She chose the white one then re-wrapped the red and handed it back to Mary.
‘Ye give it to Louis when he comes Mary. He’d like that, he really would.’ Cat drew up a chair and sat next to her sister stroking her forehead. ‘Thanks a million Mary, I’ll treasure it knowin’ ye bought it for me.’
Mary patted her hand, ‘So, off ye go now and get that letter in the post today.’
43
Eltham
July 1921
Louis was wheeling his bicycle out of the front gate as the postman arrived with Cat’s letter. He leaned his bicycle against the gatepost, took the letter from the postman and lit up a cigarette before tearing the envelope open. His hand trembled slightly as he held the paper and read Cat’s letter.
My Dearest Louis,
I am writing to say I have thought over what has happened and decided I was partly in the wrong - and I am sorry.
I won’t lead ye to believe I came to this decision alone, because that would be a deception, which was the basis of our problem in the first place.
I went to see Mary today, and she guessed that something was the matter between us. I have not told Mummy and Dada or anyone else we have quarreled, nobody knows - only Mary.
We had a chat and she made me realise that what ye did was not just a matter of deceiving me for the sake of it, but was a way of trying to earn money to feed us and keep the roof over our heads, while retaining your sense of pride.
I don’t know why I couldn’t see it that way at the time, but I do now, and I want ye to forgive my hastiness in running away like that. I did not give ye the opportunity to explain, and I know I would not listen to anything ye tried to say, but I hope ye can find it in your heart to forgive a foolish woman.
Louis, I hate us being apart. It was awful when ye were away during the war and I always expected that once it was over, we would never be apart again. This is not what I want, so won’t ye please come on over and join us?
Dada and Tom will be getting the harvest in soon, and could use another pair of helping hands as a lot of the local lads have either gone to England or America looking for work. I think we’ve enough in the tin to pay for a ticket, especially with the money ye made playing the violin - so please come.
If ye send a telegram to the Post Office here, I will collect it. Just say either, ye can come over or ye cannot. No more than that, otherwise old Niamh McNamara will spread gossip; she has a nose as long as an elephant’s trunk.
One thing I have come to realise is that good marriages are not achieved by chance; they have to be worked at. So, Louis, this leaves me wishing for the entire world I was there with ye and could let ye see that I am truly sorry.
Your loving wife
Cat xx
He folded the letter, put it in his jacket pocket, mounted his bicycle and rode off towards Woolwich.
Smiling to himself as he turned the corner of the road, he freewheeled down the hill, promising himself a lovely day busking in the market place.
44
Monroe, Fethard
July 1921
Louis was no stranger to the scythe and glad of the work, threw himself into it wholeheartedly. Ned and Tom were relieved as they were up against it trying to get the hay in on their own before rain spoiled it.
The fields looked glorious to Louis’ eyes after the drabness of Eltham. Though busking meant he was out in the fresh air all day, he felt so much better working on the land.
He managed to discuss things about his busking and Cat finally agreed to him continuing with it. Louis’ convincing argument came in the form of an example when they sat talking following his arrival in Fethard.
‘After all,’ he had said, ‘you would make a dress for a sister and wouldn’t charge her, but you would charge someone else. I play for nothing entertaining friends and family, but charge strangers for listening – it’s the same principle.’
Louis convinced her and they agreed not to quarrel over it any more. He would carry on doing it for as long as it took until he managed to gain permanent work.
Louis saw a change in Ned. He thought he looked older; his movements seemed slower and he was inclined to stop what he was doing and stand about daydreaming.
Tom didn’t stop telling Louis how grateful he was for his help as he said he was finding it impossible to cope under the circumstances. Most of the local youths had drifted overseas looking for work and those that were left behind were unable to help themselves, let alone others. The price of produce had dropped and they were working harder for less.
After the long days gathering the crops, Louis, Cat and the children usually ate a meal with Maeve, Ned and Tom and his wife Norah at Monroe, then strolled slowly back to O’Connell’s hotel where they were staying with her Auntie Nellie.
One evening, just before the children went to bed, Louis was relaxing in the hotel bar with Mary’s husband Daniel, and Cat brought the children to him to say goodnight. As the children were kissing Louis, the lounge door burst open and Peggy rushed in.
‘Daniel!’ she said breathlessly, ‘Mary went into labour a while back. I couldn’t find ye, so I’ve sent for Mrs. Morrisey, she’s with her now.’
‘But, she’s not due yet,’ Daniel replied looking puzzled.
‘Well any fool can tell that! G’w’on off with ye,’ Peggy said flopping down onto a chair.
Louis and Cat looked at each other, and then at Daniel, who finished his drink then gathered his jacket and bag together.
Cat stood up. ‘Daniel, shall I come with ye?’
He nodded, ‘Maybe come along in a little while once ye’ve put the children to bed, Cat.’ He stooped to kiss the children standing before him. ‘Yes,’ he added, ‘that’ll be a good idea, thanks.’
After Daniel left, Peggy, Louis and Cat fell silent for a while before Cat spoke.
‘Are ye thinkin’ what I’m thinking?’
Louis sighed. ‘Yes, probably. Sounds like history repeating itself doesn’t it?’ He picked up his glass and finished his drink. ‘Better get the children settled down before ye go, Cat. It could be a long night.’
Peggy looked worried. ‘I hope she doesn’t go through what ye went through Cat. Though she has Mrs. Morrisey over there with her which is more than ye had at the time. I had better get back to the shop as I have to put Marie to bed. Let me know later how things are won’t ye Cat?’
‘Sure I will, but it won’t be for a while yet I suppose.’
‘No, I suppose not. Anyway, ye know where I am; just call me if ye need me, any time.’
After Peggy left, Cat and Louis went upstairs to put the children to bed, though Cat wanted to be away as quickly as possible.
Louis felt it would be better if she did not go because he was worried about her having the memory of her last birth resurrected, but she brushed aside the suggestion. He watched her prepare to leave.
‘Cat?’
‘Yes?’
‘Last night was pretty special to me. I just hope you do not become pregnant again as a result.’
‘Ah, Louis, ’tis not a worry of mine ye know.’ She was pinning her hair up and turned to face him.
‘But it would not be wise to have another baby, now or later.’
‘Perhaps we should have thought of that before last night, my love.’ She smiled at him, put the hairbrush down and crossed the room to fold her arms around his neck. ‘Louis, c’mon now quit worrying. We can’t stay celibate forever, ’tis just not possible. Ye only have to look at me and, well, ye know!’
‘Cat. Cat. I don’t want anything to happen to you, I was so frightened that night.’
‘Nothin’s goin’ to happen to me. Nothin’ at all.’
Louis looked down at her thinking how mischievous she seemed. He gave her a squeeze, and then playfully slapped her on the backside as she turned to finish her hair.
As she stood before the dressing table mirror, she watched him. He looked worried.
‘I’ll be here long after ye’re pushin’ up the daisies,’ she laughed.
‘Oh don’t say that. I hate thinking about that sort of thing Cat. Maybe I saw too much of it in the war, but I can’t bear to imagine us being parted by death, it’s horrible.’
‘C’mon then let’s not think about it. ’Twon’t happen.’ She straightened her blouse and tucked it into the waistband of her skirt.
After checking the children were asleep, Cat told Louis she was ready to leave for Mary’s house.
He was sitting by the window in the bedroom reading a book and she went over to him and from behind, put her arms around his neck, kissing the crown of his head.
‘Don’t wait up, I may be some time.’
He caught hold of her wrist and kissed the palm of her hand before she slipped quietly from the room and ran downstairs, emerging on to Main Street just as Breda arrived.
‘Hello there Breda, where are ye off to?’
‘I’m walkin’ out to tell Mummy Mary’s in labour. Ye’re goin’ over to Mary’s, aren’t ye?
‘Yes.’
‘Good. I hoped I’d catch ye before ye left. I’ll walk part of the way with ye.’ They fell into step walking a little quicker than normal, each anxious to get to their destinations.
Dusk diminished into nightfall, the country sounds subdued, so that church bell striking every half hour was all that could be heard. Midnight came and went followed by the early hours preceding dawn. Mary made little progress and was showing signs of exhaustion, so Daniel had to send for Dr. Murray as he was unable to tend to her himself.
Daniel and Cat slipped outside the house and strolled in the garden at around three in the morning leaving ‘Old Murray’ to minister to Mary.
They both felt the atmosphere in the bedroom was oppressive. Daniel had become irritated with Doctor Murray who had exchanged several cross words with both Mrs. Morrisey and himself.
‘Why on Earth won’t he just retire and let me take over the practice?’ Daniel complai
ned to Cat. ‘His methods are antiquated and I feel my more up-to-date training would be far more effective. He’s out of touch and would be better as a horse doctor.’
Cat smiled, though she was beginning to feel very anxious. ‘I’m worried she’s gettin’ awful tired, Daniel.’
‘Yes, that’s what I mean. He won’t listen and let me give her somethin’ to help the birth along. I have some medicine in my bag which would mean it could be all over and done within an hour.’
‘What is it ye have?’
‘Somethin’ most girls that get into trouble would pay a lot of money for.’
‘Oh. Not somethin’ dangerous is it?’
‘Can be in the wrong hands. It’s a derivative of Ergot, not commonly used by all, as it can be disastrous, but I have a little and wouldn’t hesitate to use it now if necessary.’
‘What’s that when it’s at home?’
‘I’ll explain some other time, Cat. But if only he’d let me give it to her.’
‘Why don’t ye insist?’
‘I can’t administer to anyone in my own family. It’s against medical ethics.’
‘That seems a bit harsh.’
‘Not really. After all, say I wanted to commit a murder and it was a member of my own family, then it would be easy if I were allowed to treat them. It’s there to protect the doctor as well as the members of a family. It stops mal-practice. So ye see I have to let Doctor Murray have his own way, regardless!’
They strolled around the garden several more times, sometimes falling silent, then striking up conversation simultaneously and laughing.
Eventually they decided to go back inside and as they climbed the stairs they could hear a slapping noise coming from the bedroom. They looked at each other and grinned.
‘The baby’s been born, Cat, I can hear him slapping its bottom,’ Daniel said, and charged up the stairs followed by Cat.
They burst into the bedroom only to find that Mary was lying motionless in the bed and Mrs. Morrisey, kneeling beside her, was sobbing.
Dr. Murray, in a futile attempt at revival was slapping the back of Mary’s hand. The doctor turned and bowed his head.
Under the July Sun Page 19