Knowledge had been his only friend. He had always been a rebel. No authority could hope to hold him, only his loyalty to Mikhail. He had his own rigid code of honor, which he was unswerving in following. Honor was his life. Yet he felt he had compromised even that in the way he had acquired Savannah.
When Savannah had refused to examine his mind so that he could prove to her that she had brought him back from the other side, so that she would be unafraid, know he was incapable of ever harming her again, she had refused out of respect for him. Yet he believed she had been rejecting him. He believed she could never really forgive the things in his life he had been chosen to do. He couldn’t forgive himself.
She saw it all. Every dark, dangerous deed. Every dark, ugly kill. Every law he had broken. But most of all she saw his greatness. Time and time again, he had given of himself to heal others, draining his great strength, putting himself in danger over and over that others might live. A lifetime of selfless service to a people who grew to fear the very power they relied on. While none of the ugliness of the hunt, none of the danger, touched the others, he lived in constant readiness. He accepted the necessity of his solitary existence, his strict isolation. He had come to believe the Carpathians were right to fear him. And Savannah saw that they were right. He wielded far too much power for one individual, carried far too much weight on his broad shoulders.
For centuries Gregori had no real anchor in their world, no emotions to keep him from turning. There had been only his strength and determination. His will of iron. His strict code of honor. His loyalty to Mikhail and his belief that their race had a place in the world. His resolve to prevent the children of their race from dying, a way to find true lifemates for the men to keep them from turning vampire. Mikhail’s finding Raven had given him a measure of relief in the form of hope. Still, once Savannah had been conceived, the world had turned into a long, endless hell for Gregori. Each minute had turned to an hour, each hour into a day, until he was nearly mad with waiting for her.
Upon Savannah’s refusal of their union, he had made a vow to himself to give her five years of freedom. He felt that since she would be tied forever to one who would rule her life absolutely, he owed her at least that small amount of time. To Gregori, every moment was an agony of holding out against the darkness so deeply entrenched in him. He had waited until he knew he would succumb, until he knew he would no longer have the wisdom or desire to choose the dawn—self-destruction, the only honorable option for a Carpathian about to turn vampire. He had fulfilled his vow of freedom for her and in doing so nearly lost his soul. After all those centuries of holding out, he had risked the damnation of his soul for her five years of freedom.
Savannah sat very still, absorbing his memories. The only beauty in his barren, lonely existence had been the years she was growing up, when he was free to share her life as the wolf. She was unafraid of the wolf, giving him total, unconditional love, her every confidence, her unqualified acceptance. He had never had that before. He craved it, needed it, and believed she would never give it to him again.
He accepted the fact that she would never love him, that she would always look at him with fear. It was almost as if he believed he deserved not to be loved because he was certain he had acquired her unfairly. He had not been prepared for the gut-wrenching pain it caused him, or the violent emotions she stirred in him. Savannah stayed very, very still, on the verge of a great discovery.
It wasn’t any woman he wanted, as she had believed. And he certainly didn’t want a puppet, as she had accused him. He wanted Savannah, with her sense of humor, her pride and compassion, and even her nasty temper. No other woman held the slightest interest for him. No other woman would ever do for him.
He was in pain. Terrible pain. He felt her grief over the loss of Peter. He felt her fear of him. He felt the pain of his own loneliness and eternal isolation. It radiated from his very soul. He was resigned to hold that pain for all time. And he would never show it to her.
Savannah moved out of his mind while she was still undetected. He was terribly lonely, so much so that she wanted to cry for him. And he didn’t have the faintest idea how to love someone, laugh with someone, or share his life. He only knew that he had to keep her safe at any cost. She had named him monster, and he believed her to be right.
She stared out the window into the forest. Gregori was many things. He had broken just about every law they had without one iota of remorse. He had killed countless times. He had more power in his little finger than most members of her race combined. But he was not a monster. Never that.
Her foot tapped out a light rhythm on the rock floor. The branches of the trees swayed slightly in syncopation. She did have power, far more than she had ever expected. Gregori wanted her. More than that, he needed her. That particular revelation changed everything. It put control back in her hands, gave her back her life. She squared her shoulders. She was no longer a child running from a nameless fear.
She was his lifemate, chosen by God to walk with a man of power, of honor. A sensual, strong male who needed her more than anyone else on earth ever could.
Savannah took a deep breath and let it out carefully. “Gregori?” She kept her voice low and neutral.
He lifted his head slowly, but she felt his mind brush hers. The invasion didn’t inspire fear this time. She accepted his merge without shying away from it. “This is a very beautiful place. It’s amazing that you were able to do this.” She heard a slight rustle, a movement behind her, but she didn’t turn around. “You’re quite an artist.”
She could smell him, his woodsy, spicy scent. Masculine, warm, exciting. She touched the rock wall and smiled to herself, thinking the feel of the rock was a lot like the way Gregori’s hard body felt beneath her fingertips.
“It took a few months,
chйrie,
the months I spent up here alone, waiting for your show to come to San Francisco.”
His voice was so beautiful. She allowed herself to listen to it, to feel the purity of it, to let the black velvet brush her mind. “It is really beautiful, Gregori. We can summer here when we’re in this country.”
He touched her hair because he couldn’t help himself, and he was surprised when she didn’t flinch away from him. It pleased him to hear her talk as if she accepted that they would be together in the future. He didn’t respond, however, afraid that whatever he said would break their fragile truce.
She reached behind her, found his arm with her palm, and touched him. She felt his pulse jump beneath her fingertips and kept her smile to herself. “So, are you going to explain to me how the vampire was able to use my own mother’s voice to draw me out? I am presuming it was a vampire. And how come I felt a compulsion to answer? I am Carpathian; a compulsion shouldn’t have worked so quickly or easily on me.” She continued to stare out the window.
Flames were licking up the length of his arm from where her hand rested. Savannah had somehow worked out for herself that he believed her safety was in jeopardy. “The vampire is an illusionist, much like yourself. He has practiced mimicking voices for centuries. Now he uses the talent for calling others to him. I recognized the brush of compulsion in the tone, and, of course, your mother would have chosen to use your private channel of communication, not the standard.” His voice was emotionless, not in any way condemning her blunder.
She blushed anyway. Why hadn’t she caught that? Stupid, stupid mistake. A mistake like that could have gotten her, perhaps both of them, killed. She turned to face him. Gregori’s sensual features were carefully impassive. His silver eyes merely reflected back her own image. “I guess I owe you an apology for calling you names. I acted childishly, and I’m sorry.”
He blinked. She had surprised him. Savannah felt her heart warm, a funny, melting sensation. “I want you to do something for me. I realize I am not very experienced with vampires, but rather than arbitrarily demanding my obedience, perhaps you could tell me what is going on. I’m going to rely on your judgment,
Gregori. I won’t try to defy you. I just have this problem with someone telling me what to do. Even as a child I had a hard time with it—don’t you remember?” She deliberately referred to her childhood, the one happy bridge they had between them.
His mouth didn’t smile, but a hint of warmth crept into the bleakness in his eyes. “I remember. You did your best to do the exact opposite of everything you were told.”
Her smile was intriguing. Gregori couldn’t stop staring at her mouth.
“You’d think I would have grown out of it by now, but I haven’t. Try to work with me on this.”
Her enormous blue eyes pleaded with him. He felt as if he was falling into their depths. “Please.”
He wrapped a length of her hair around his wrist. “I will try,
bйbй
, but first comes your safety. Always.”
She laughed softly. “Gregori, I know you will never let anything happen to me. It isn’t something I worry about.”
“It is uppermost in my mind.” He sounded very stern.
She tilted her chin at him. “Has it occurred to you that I have been all by myself these last five years and that nothing ever happened to me?”
Gregori smiled then, lending a sensuality to the curve of his mouth. “You have never been truly alone,
chйrie,
never at any time. When it was too dangerous for me to be near you, I made certain others were close.”
Her quick temper flashed in spite of her every resolution not to let it. Her blue eyes scattered sparks. “You had someone watching me?”
There was something about the way the color rose in her cheeks, the flash of her eyes, the lift of her breasts when she was angry, that made him want to keep her that way. “I was not the only one,
ma petite.
Your father would never have allowed you to be without protection. You should have known that.”
“My own father?” How could she not have known? It would be just like Mikhail. Just like Gregori. Here she thought she had acquired such independence, that she had struck a blow for all Carpathian women, and all the time they were having her watched. “I hired a security company to work my tours,” she said, wanting him to recognize that she hadn’t been careless about her safety.
“Humans.” His tone said it all. “You needed one of us.”
“Who? Who did you trust enough, Gregori?” she asked, curious. Trust would be alien to his nature. What other male would he have entrusted his lifemate’s safety to? It seemed so out of character for him.
Gregori pushed a hand through the shaggy mane of hair falling to his broad shoulders. His neck hurt. Absently, he tried another massage. “Some situations call for extreme measures. I chose the strongest, most powerful man I knew, one with an unwavering code of honor. His name is Julian. Julian Savage.”
“Aidan Savage’s twin brother. He’s here? In the city?” She had never met Aidan Savage, but she had heard of him from her father. He was a vampire hunter for the Carpathian people. Mikhail greatly respected him, and that in itself said a lot for the man. Recently he had found his lifemate. Savannah had hoped to visit them while she was in the city. They were probably as starved for someone from their homeland as she had been. “Did Aidan know his brother was here protecting me?”
“I am certain Aidan would sense his presence in the area. How could he not? They are twins. Whether Julian will choose to see him, I do not know. He is struggling with the darkness.”
Savannah turned away from those bleak, glittering eyes. So cold. So alone. So lost.
Gregori. The Dark One. Her dark one. Her Gregori.
She could hardly bear his pain. It didn’t show, not on that expressionless face, the face carved from pure granite, like the rock lair. It wasn’t in his pale eyes, so arctic cold they reminded her of death itself. It wasn’t in any part of his mind that he was sharing with her. She felt it all the same. His heart, her heart. His soul, her soul. They were one and the same. Two halves of the same whole. He didn’t know it yet, didn’t really believe it. After all, he thought it wasn’t true chemistry, that he had managed to manipulate their joining. She knew better.
She had known it when she shared her life with the wolf. Maybe not in her head, but in her heart and soul. She had known it when she reached into the black void, into the darkness, and pulled him back to her. She had known it when she shared her body with him, as innocent as she was, as inhibited as she had felt. She feared him, but she knew he was the one. Her heart and soul recognized him.
“The dawn approaches,
chйrie,
” he said softly. “It is best if we get some sleep.” It would be best for her. His body was raging at him, wanting the feel of her skin next to his. He needed to hold her in his arms and shelter her close to his heart. For one brief moment, he could pretend he would not be forever alone. She would keep the darkness at bay for him long enough to get him through another day.
Her hand slid down the length of his arm to his hand. Her fingertips brushed the contours of his muscles. Just a skimming sensation, but his entire body clenched with hot desire. It poured into him, raged at him, molten lava surging through his blood and filling his body with piercing heat. In her innocence, she didn’t notice what she was doing to him. Her fingers laced in his trustingly.
“What about Peter? What do you think we should do to minimize the risk? Because you’re right, the press is going to give me a hard time. They follow me all over, those ratty little tabloids.” Her enormous eyes were staring straight into his silver ones.
He couldn’t look away, couldn’t let go of her hand. He couldn’t have moved if his life depended on it. He was lost in those blue-violet eyes, somewhere in their mysterious, haunting, sexy depths. What was it he had decided? Decreed? He was not going to allow her anywhere near Peter’s funeral. Why was his resolve fading away to nothing? He had reasons, good reasons. He was certain of it. Yet now, drowning in her huge eyes, his thoughts on the length of her lashes, the curve of her cheek, the feel of her skin, he couldn’t think of denying her. After all, she hadn’t tried to defy him; she didn’t know he had made the decision to keep her away from Peter’s funeral. She was including him in the plans, as if they were a unit, a team. She was asking his advice. Would it be so terrible to please her over this? It was important to her.
He blinked to keep from falling into her gaze and found himself staring at the perfection of her mouth.
The way her lips parted so expectantly. The way the tip of her tongue darted out to moisten her full lower lip. Almost a caress. He groaned. An invitation. He braced himself to keep from leaning over and tracing the exact path with his own tongue. He was being tortured. Tormented.
Her perfect lips formed a slight frown. He wanted to kiss it right off her mouth. “What is it, Gregori?” She reached up to touch his lips with her fingertip. His heart nearly jumped out of his chest. He caught her wrist and clamped it against his pumping heart.
“Savannah,” he whispered. An ache. It came out that way. An ache. He knew it. She knew it. God, he wanted her with every cell in his body. Untamed. Wild. Crazy. He wanted to bury himself so deep inside her that she would never get him out.
Her hand trembled in answer, a slight movement rather like the flutter of butterfly wings. He felt it all the way through his body. “It is all right,
mon amour”
he said softly. “I am not asking for anything.”
“I know you’re not. I’m not denying you anything. I know we need to have time to become friends, but I’m not going to deny what I feel already. When you’re close to me, my body temperature jumps about a thousand degrees.” Her blue eyes were dark and beckoning, steady on his.
He touched her mind very gently, almost tenderly, slipped past her guard and knew what courage it took for her to make the admission. She was nervous, even afraid, but willing to meet him halfway. The realization nearly brought him to his knees. A muscle jumped in his jaw, and the silver eyes heated to m
olten mercury, but his face was as impassive as ever.
“I think you are a witch, Savannah, casting a spell over me.” His hand cupped her face, his thumb sliding over her delicate cheekbone.
She moved closer, and he felt her need for comfort, for reassurance. Her arms slid tentatively around his waist. Her head rested on his sternum. Gregori held her tightly, simply held her, waiting for her trembling to cease. Waiting for the warmth of his body to seep into hers.
Gregori’s hand came up to stroke the thick length of silken, ebony hair, taking pleasure in the simple act. It brought a measure of peace to both of them. He would never have believed what a small thing like holding a woman could do to a man. She was turning his heart inside out; unfamiliar emotions surged wildly through him and wreaked havoc with his well-ordered life. In his arms, next to his hard strength, she felt fragile, delicate, like an exotic flower that could be easily broken.
“Do not worry about Peter,
ma petite,
” he whispered into the silken strands of her hair. “We will see to his resting place tomorrow.”
“Thank you, Gregori,” Savannah said. “It matters a lot to me.”
He lifted her easily into his arms. “I know. It would be simpler if I did not. Come to my bed,
chйrie,
where you belong.”
His arms were strong, and the wildness in him was beckoning her. Her arms crept around his neck. She moved his hair so that she could burrow close to his skin. “And if the vampire comes?” Her lips drifted against his ear, then lower, her tongue caressing an intriguing little dip. “What do you plan to do with me if the renegades should come again?”
Her breath was heated silk, her mouth hot satin. Her teeth nipped gently. There was no thought in his mind, just a roar of hunger for her body. Mindless, scorching hunger. Her teeth nibbled at his collarbone while her hand slid inside his shirt. Her fingers tangled in the spread of dark hairs across his chest, found each defined muscle and traced it. The roar spread throughout his body until he shook with it.
Dark Magic (Dark Series - book 4) Page 11