“What did you dream about?” she asked, wiping his hair from his brow.
Sami pursed his lips and focused on her. “Tiern.”
Though she knew he wanted her to leave it alone, she wasn’t going to. “I’m not leaving, so you might as well tell me.” She grinned when he glared at her.
Sami rolled his eyes and sighed. “Fine. I keep having these dreams about—” He stopped talking.
“About?”
Sami took a deep breath and exhaled. “Well, it’s more like a vision.”
Tierney waited.
“Fine. Okay, it’s just that—”
“What?” she prompted.
“This dream, it terrifies me,” he said, giving her a pretty good indication of how freaked he must be to admit such a thing.
Tierney lay down next to him, and the thought of how they used to sleep cuddled up together as children, pierced her heart. “Tell me about it.” She pushed the memories away.
“Well, there’s this female and I feel this deep connection with her.”
“Who is she?” Tierney rubbed his arm.
“I’m not sure, I’ve never seen her before, but, she’s important to me,” he whispered.
“Important how?”
“Ah, like soul mate.”
“Oh. Wow.” She stared at Sami, waiting for him to say more.
After a few seconds, he continued in a quiet voice. “I feel so overwhelmed, and devastated when I wake up.”
“Oh Sami.” Tierney hugged her sweet friend, her heart aching, wishing she could help more.
“I need to find her,” he said after a moment.
“What does she look like?”
“She’s around our age, with short black hair sticking out all over and …” The more Sami talked, the calmer he became. It made Tierney smile. This woman sounded like Sami’s kind of girl. “… she has beautiful silver eyes, pale skin. She’s slender. Around five-six.”
Wow. So much detail. “So, what happens?” she asked, almost afraid of the answer.
Sami swallowed. “Well, it starts off in this building filled with cages. Then it shifts and I find myself outside somewhere, staring at these pits in the ground,” Sami paused, closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them, he continued. “They’re filled with burning bodies. I hear someone cussing, and turn to see two men dragging the woman by the arms. She’s fighting them, but they drag her over to the edge of the pit and—” Because his shields were lowered, Sami’s pain thrust like a sharp dagger into her heart. Squeezing him, she wiped tears from her eyes.
“I try to get to her, but I’m not fast enough and, they throw her on the fire,” Sami said with despair.
“No—” Tierney felt everything Sami always held back. His emotions overwhelmed her, leaving her unable to speak. At least now she understood his attitude earlier. “I’m sorry, Sami. I was so wrapped up in my own problems.”
“No Tiern, with Zander missing and Jax being—well, Jax. You didn’t need this on your plate too.”
“Sami. You shoulda told me.”
“I hate being such a wuss, falling apart like this.”
Still hugging him, Tierney ran her hand over his hair. “Yeah, you’re such a giant wuss!” She gave him a playful swat, making him snort. “Sweetie, really! You’re not a wuss, I’ve seen you in action, and know how fierce you can be. I really am sorry for not being here for you.” Sorry for being a shitty friend and for how much he hurt over this woman.
Sami shook his head and closed his eyes. “Thanks, Tiern.”
“For what? I didn’t do anything other than wake you up.”
“You listen. Besides, being near you always helps.” Sami turned over and snuggled into her.
Tierney wished she had some words of wisdom. Instead, she began to rub his back, wondering when this dream of his would happen.
“She feels like she’s my other half,” he finally whispered.
Yeah, Tierney understood what he meant all too well. Different memories of Jax entered her mind before she pushed them away. “So, you dream this often?”
“Five times.”
“What the hell? You’ve had this dream five times, and this is the first you’re telling me?” She faked indignation and Sami chuckled. “Does it ever change?”
Sami shook his head. “No.”
Crap. Tierney’s heart ached for him. “I love you, Sami.”
“Love you, too, Tiern.”
***
JAX PASSED SAMI’S SUITE when he caught Tierney’s whispered voice telling Sami she loved him. No! The rage he’d been fighting all evening flared to life, and he struggled not to tear the door from its hinges and drag her from Sami’s room.
The urge to haul her into his own room and finally make her his, damn near consumed him. The fire in her eyes, her smile, her touch and her whispered words should all be for me. A black fog started to invade his brain, and Jax pushed away from the wall, grabbing the door handle. He intended to follow through when a sharp pain lanced through his head, chasing the dark fog and rage away. What the fuck, man. Are you psychotic now too? She is not yours!
Horrified, Jax yanked his hand from the handle and fled to his room. I need … Glancing around, he dragged a hand through his short hair and stalked over to the small bar in the corner. Without looking to see what he grabbed, he snatched the two largest bottles and headed out the French doors to the balcony.
Forest scent’s and the ozone in the night air hit him, along with a light rain as he stumbled over to the wooden railing. Realization dawned and he started to shake. I made this happen. She told me she wasn’t going to wait forever, and I told her not to. This is my fault, I wanted her to find someone else and she did. My wish came true. So why does it hurt so much?
Jax closed his eyes as bile rose in his throat. He gripped the railing so tight his fists hurt. Opening his eyes, he leaned over and considered the jagged rocks far below. Sometimes being immortal sucked. Damn sure made killing one-self near impossible. He would know.
He avoided looking at the scars on his wrists from where he’d tried to take his own life. Fate sure got the last laugh that day. It was during his captivity when he was ten, and he just couldn’t take anymore. One of the men had left a paring knife behind, and Jax managed to get a hold of it. But of course, as luck would have it, his normally slow-healing self decided it didn’t really want to die, and before he could bleed out, his wrists healed. Why the hell can’t I heal like that regularly? Fate just loves to fuck me over, but shit … to let a child suffer so? It just never seemed right.
A crushing agony built inside him, but no matter how much he hurt, nothing changed. He was still a disgusting mess who didn’t deserve Tierney’s love—or anyone else’s. Desolate, he eased his grip, slid down, and leaned back against the railing. Soul-deep pain choked him as he opened one of the bottles and downed half the liquid in one swallow, ignoring the burn. I fucking mess everything up! He took another swig, and another.
As he became intoxicated, the shadows of the night wrapped their chilly arms around him and sucked him down, plunging him into his past. The more he screamed and cried, the more the men hurt him. Until finally, unable to handle any more, Jax’s ten-year old mind and soul finally shattered—creating a place within the deepest reaches where no one hurt him. A place filled with beauty, warmth and the comfort of Tierney’s arms as she told him everything would be okay.
Eventually, he became lost in his paradise until he was rescued and yanked back to reality. At first, he’d been so angry to be pulled away from the only bright thing in his life, until a voice he vaguely recognized told him to hold on.
“Everything will get better,” his rescuer said. Over the years though, he often retreated to his paradise when life became unbearable, but now, that place was like the rest of him. Cold, desolate and dark.
***
TIERNEY LAY AWAKE, RESTLESS and unable to sleep. Her mind spun with worry for her dad, and concern for Sami. Unease filled her at the weir
d raven episode, the ass in the SUV, and whoever had followed her that evening. To top everything off, anger and hurt coiled like a serpent at the thought of Jax with Cassie.
She glanced at Sami as he slept and smoothed his hair back. He looks so peaceful. Tierney hoped his sleep stayed dreamless for the rest of the night.
Unable to lie still any longer, she crawled from his bed and hurried to her room. She pulled her clothing off and tossed each item on the high-backed chair, yanked on her sleep shirt and headed into her bathroom.
After brushing her teeth, she walked back into her room and pulled the duvet back on her bed and sat down. But her dragon stirred, restless as well. Frustrated, she stood up and wandered over to the French doors, pulling them open. Brr! She shivered at the chill as a light rain fell from the sky. So dreary out …
Tierney started to close the door when her dragon reared up and growled, freezing her in place. Okay, that’s a first. Although always aware of her dragon, the presence now banging around inside her almost hurt.
The word Outside, drifted through her mind making her frown. What the hell? Finally, with a deep breath, she shrugged, stepped outside and paused. Power floating in the air raised the fine hairs on her arms. What the—? She felt around with her senses, her eyes widening in alarm at the dark cloud seeping along the balcony.
An inky darkness, blacker than night, seemed to hover in front of Jax’s room. Tierney frowned. Is that someone on the floor by the railing? It looks like—oh shit. Jax! Ignoring the anger and pain wafting with sharp teeth in the black fog, Tierney shivered and waded through, hurrying over to him. Fuck! Jax sat, head bowed and legs pulled to his chest as if trying to protect himself.
“Jax,” Tierney shouted, kicking an empty bourbon bottle away to crouch beside him. Frozen white fingers clutched a damn near finished bottle of Tequila. What is he doing? Why is he drinking so much? “Jax?” Tierney laid her hand on his back and found herself sucked into the nightmare inside his head.
“Stop! No! Please, stop. Please!” Jax’s young voice screamed and begged, ten years old again and lost in a time when two men held him captive. Oh love. With a cry, Tierney pulled from his mind and yanked her hand away. Strengthening her shields, she wrapped her arms around his wet, frozen body. Damn!
“Jax, love, come back. I’m here. Come back to me.” She chanted, over and over, holding him tight until he started to respond.
Through his wet T-shirt, her fingers brushed across the numerous raised scars on his back. Scars he tried to keep secret from her, and though she knew, Tierney never let on. Jax turned eleven the day Marcius brought the boys back. He lay unconscious and near death while Tierney and her dad tended his broken body, and cried at the horror of the damage inflicted on him.
Now, as she dragged him from his memories, he tensed up. “T-Tiern?” He blinked up at her.
“Yeah, I’m here.”
“Wha you doin’ out here?” He started to shake.
“I should ask you the same thing, but you’re drunk and freezing. We need to get you inside.” She tried to urge him to get up.
Jax looked away and shook his head. “Jus’ leave me.”
Tierney glanced away and wiped her eyes. “Nope, not gonna happen.” She pried the tequila away from him and downed the last bit, tasting the added Nectar, before dropping it to the ground. Oh Jax … She stood and tugged, trying to get him to stand. He didn’t move.
“L-leave me,” he repeated, ducking his head and wrapping his arms around his legs.
“Nope.” Putting more strength into her efforts, she pulled him to his feet.
“Why?” Pain-filled eyes met hers, and his voice sounded just like he had as a kid, asking her why his father hated him.
Tierney bit her lip to keep from crying. “Cause I’m not leaving you out here to freeze.”
Jax blinked and with a wobble, clutched her and groaned. “I don’t feel so good.”
Tierney snorted. “I can imagine. Come on, let’s get you inside.” She pulled the doors closed behind them and dreaded seeing Cassie in his bed.
“So c-cold. You are so warm, Tiern—you feel reallllyyy good,” he mumbled as they made their way through his room to his empty bed.
“Where’s Cassie?” she asked, looking around.
“Other room, down stairs,” he said, making Tierney much happier.
“Here, sit down.” She eased him onto the edge of his bed. “We need to get you into some dry clothes.” Tierney started to pull his shirt off but Jax yanked it back down in a panic.
“N-no.” He wrapped his arms around himself and shook his head. The shame in his eyes made her want to hold him and never let go. “How can you s-stand to be ’round me?” he whispered.
Tierney stared into twin pools filled with unspeakable pain. He reminded her of the scared little boy who woke up thinking he was still in hell after being unconscious for a week. “Jax.” Breath hitching in her chest and heart breaking at an anguish she wished she could fix, Tierney pulled him against her. “Shhh, I love you, and I love being around you,” she soothed.
Jax shook his head and Tierney’s heart twisted at the emotions she was picking up from him. No one can love me, I’m unlovable.
“That’s not true, we all love you,” she whispered.
But Jax refused to believe so Tierney just held him close. Most of the thoughts flitting through his mind didn’t make much sense to her, but she did catch his self-recriminations, and they made her soul ache. As he began to relax, his arms reached around her, though she couldn’t bring herself to say anything about it. Especially when she caught his next thought.
I feel like I’m home … She almost melted into a weeping puddle on the floor. Then she caught his masculine scent and he felt so good in her arms, even wet, that she was filled with yearning. Then he began to nuzzle her chest. “Hmm.”
Her eyes closed and she stifled a groan as heat spread through her. Get a grip, girl, the guy is soaking, freezing and drunk, and all you can think about is how good he feels?
“Okay Jax, let’s get this shirt off.” She quickly slipped his shirt off over his head before he even realized what had happened.
She pretended not to see the scars covering his body, as she turned to rifle through his duffle bag, though she did feel his eyes burning holes in her. “Here, we’ll put this one on.” She slipped a clean shirt over his head. “Okay, now can you stand?” She didn’t meet his eyes, and he didn’t respond, but she did feel the heat of his gaze warming her.
***
JAX DIDN’T SAY A WORD. He wanted to sink into a deep hole. She’d just seen his grotesque patchwork of scars and couldn’t even look at him now. For some lucky reason, the bastards had never touched his face. But the rest of him was covered in thick, ugly scars. Scars he’d never wanted Tierney to see. Over the years, he tried so hard to keep them from her, not wanting to witness her revulsion or pity. Now the secret was out.
***
TIERNEY SIGHED AND HELPED him to his feet, then jumped when his arms encircled her and pulled away a step. Hands shaking, she ignored her racing heart and fumbled to undo the button and zipper on his jeans. “Jax, we need to get your wet pants off.”
With a ragged moan he clutched her shoulders as she pushed his jeans down. Then she crouched to push them lower. The sight of the shiny, thick head of his cock standing at attention sent desire tingling through. He wasn’t wearing any underwear. Heat rushed to her face, and Tierney averted her gaze as she eased the wet jeans off first one leg, then the other. She caught sight of a sore looking wound and she had to resist the urge to touch.
The sound of ragged breathing drew her eyes up. She bit her lower lip at his rock-hard erection surrounded by a patch of thick black hair. Tierney inhaled and pretended not to notice and gazed instead at his tightly corded six pack beneath his taut T-shirt. But who was she fooling? Oh yum! Feeling her face heat, she forced her eyes up further, to a sweet pair of inviting lips before settling on his blazing blue eyes.
&n
bsp; The heat of his gaze set her pulse racing even faster. Desire engulfed her. Unable to stand, she could only stare at the finely chiseled masterpiece in front of her. Then Jax pulled her up against him. Her breath caught in her throat at the contact of his skin touching her. She waited in anticipation as he lowered his lips to hers.
Even reeking of booze, his kiss melted her and revved her up at the same time. She couldn’t imagine anything better. His scent and flavor, all man. Sweet and spicy with a hint of danger. Tierney couldn’t stop a moan from slipping out. Fire spread, tightening things deep inside.
“Want you so bad,” his husky voice tickled her mouth and his hands roamed all over her body.
“Jax,” she whispered, then his lips locked on hers again. Oh mama, he intoxicated her, and she ached to have him fill her in every way possible.
“Need you.” His tongue thrust inside her mouth, savoring her. His hands sent tingles shooting through her like firecrackers. His erection, pressed firmly against her belly started her knees trembling. Sensuous lips whispered across her jaw and around her neck, making her shiver. “Tiern.”
His desperation tore through her and she wanted to give him everything they both desired. Oh, to be pressed naked against him. To let him sink deep inside of her. Oh gods, I want him. But she couldn’t lose her virginity with Jax piss-ass drunk. He might not even remember what happened the next day, or worse, might regret them being together. He did tell her to find someone else, after all. Yeah, bad idea, very bad. If only she didn’t crave him with the intensity of an inferno.
“Jax.” She twisted away regretfully and reached around him, pulling the blankets back. “Sit,” she said and eased him down on the bed.
“Tiern?” Jax gazed at her with so much need in his eyes she almost caved.
“Lie back,” she insisted, feeling bad when the hope in his gaze turned to disappointment as she covered him with the blankets.
Dracones Boxset Books 1-5 Page 6