Once outside, and with a deep pit in his stomach, Soroyan went to stand beside his brother. Okami and Raizarch wolves, some in animal form, and some in human, emerged from the house, the garage, and the forest. With quiet excitement, they gathered around.
Chapter Forty-Seven
Surprises
Raven stood back with her niece, Jax, Sami, and all the others, curious to what was going on. The Raizarch wolves stood tense, yet quiet though there were some rumblings among the Okami. While they all held Soroyan in the highest regard, it was apparent some were unhappy about what was about to happen, while others mumbled that it was about time. And it clicked. “Oh, you are doing that,” she muttered and saw Soroyan turn and glance at her, a fierce glow in his eyes, as if he’d heard.
“What’s he doing?” Tierney asked.
“You’ll see,” she said, unable to take her gaze off Soroyan, for as he watched her, love shone bright in his eyes and she felt her heart turning to mush.
“Ha! Look how he’s lookin’ at you!” Genna said merrily. Raven shook her head at the girl and noted how Genna’s friend Caden just watched everyone around him warily.
She turned back to Soroyan and even from where she stood, she could feel his reluctance along with resignation. She caught and held his gaze, telling him how she felt, even if she couldn’t say it out loud.
“Pledge yourself and honor your rightful king,” Kyrian said, staring at Soroyan with pride and unabashed love.
Raven blinked as all the Raizarch dropped to their knees, while the Okami, some reluctantly, while others reverently, followed suit.
She knew Soroyan saw the difference, and smiled at him. She wanted to reassure him that all would be fine but he seemed tense around Lucian, the one he’d been talking to earlier.
She studied the male who appeared eerily similar to Soroyan, to find him staring intently back at her. Then the ice in Lucian’s eyes thawed and he dropped to his knees and bowed his head.
Before they could speak, Soroyan held up a hand. “I do this only on the condition that you recognize Kyrian as co-king. We will rule together.”
There were many shocked gasps from the two packs. Soroyan waited until they fell silent. A moment later, as one, they began to chant.
Power rose up and flowed through the air, making Raven’s skin tingle, though with his collar, Soroyan wouldn’t be able to absorb any of it. Sadness filled her. He really needed that collar gone. Then her heart lifted at the wolves’ words to the one who was slowly taking over her heart.
“I pledge my unswerving fealty. My unquestioned loyalty, to the sons of Fenrir, grandsons of Loki. Our king. Our leader. Alpha, and keeper of Oberon’s law. To you, for all my days until I die. My life for yours. Soroyan and Kyrian.”
The words flowed in sync from every wolf’s mouth, young and old, sending shivers down Raven’s spine and bringing tears to her eyes. As the last word was spoken, her skin pricked. Every Okami and Raizarch shifted into their wolf. Then their heads rose to the night sky where millions of twinkling stars were their witness. A long, beautiful song rang out, the wolves sending their pledge into the night, until it drifted away on the wind.
Raven fought not to cry. “Well, if that wasn’t a tear jerker of a pledge, I don’t know what is,” she muttered under her breath. It was the most emotional, touching ceremony she’d ever witnessed, filled with sadness for past losses, love, hope, and so much more.
She blinked when she realized that some of her emotions were coming from Soroyan. What the … only soul mates should feel what the other is feeling. A tendril of fear filled her, but as the wolves shifted back and rose to their feet, she shoved it from her mind to think about later.
With a smile, Raven took a deep breath, and hurried over to Soroyan. She needed to touch him. To reassure him—feel the love in his eyes shining on her.
That thought gave her pause and she decided she’d analyze it all later. She moved up next to Soroyan and slipped her arms around him.
“I don’t know what to say,” she said, letting him see the emotion in her eyes. She could feel his intense need and as his lips met hers, she sighed deep inside, wishing she could take him up to her room right then.
A male cleared his throat behind them, and while they broke apart, Soroyan kept his arm around her as Lucian stepped forward.
“Lucian. I …” Soroyan took a deep breath in, let it out, and started again. “This is long overdue. I’m sorry I abandoned you when you needed me the most,” he said, tone husky. Sadness wafted from him.
The male in front of them blinked and a moment later, his impassive facade cracked. The raw emotion in his face brought tears to Raven’s eyes.
“Father,” Lucian said.
Raven sucked in a breath. Father? I thought … She’d never dreamed that he had any other children, but as old as he was, she shouldn’t be surprised. Then she realized that it was because he never once mentioned that he had a grown son.
“I have a daughter, too. Somewhere,” Soroyan said with a slight smile that was filled with guilt and sadness, before turning back to his son. “I’d like you to meet my … ah, Raven.”
Raven ignored Soroyan’s obvious nervousness and smiled at Lucian. “It is very good to meet you,” she said.
“And I you,” Lucian responded. Then he looked at Soroyan and swallowed deeply. “I used to be so angry. Now I understand.” There was so much pain in his eyes and voice, tears filled Raven’s eyes. She could feel his loss all the way to her soul.
“No.” Soroyan said. “I was your father and I failed you and your sister. After your mother and younger siblings died, I just lost my mind, and for that, I will never forgive myself.”
Lucian pursed his lips and turned away so that they wouldn’t see the tears in his eyes. He shook his head and finally turned back to Soroyan. “I had a mate, she was killed three years ago. I—” He swallowed, unable to speak.
With a little growl, Soroyan pulled Lucian into a hug. “I’m sorry, son,” he whispered.
Raven began to move away, but Soroyan pulled her close as well. After a moment, she slipped her arm back around her man and rubbed his back, wishing she could take away both of these proud men’s pain.
When they broke apart, Lucian wiped his face and gave a wry grin. “Sorry,” he said.
“Please, don’t,” Soroyan said, still holding onto Raven.
“I understand now, you know?” Lucian said.
Soroyan nodded. “Where is your sister?” he finally asked and Raven knew he’d been aching to ask all night.
Lucian sighed sadly. “I have no clue. I haven’t spoken to her in years.”
Raven could feel Soroyan’s sadness and gave him a squeeze.
Lucian took a deep breath. “I am ready to do this.” He glanced at the Raizarch wolves. “I need to move on, and Toren doesn’t need to be forced into mating someone right now.”
“Are you sure?” Soroyan asked.
Lucian took a deep breath and let it out. “Yeah, I’ll never stop missing my mate, but yeah, I can do this.”
Raven stood with Soroyan as Hinah and Honor brought forward the two twins. The youngest daughters of the Raizarch king. “We only have a couple days left. Spend time with them and decide who you would prefer to mate,” Honor said. Lucian swallowed deeply and nodded.
***
Raven led Soroyan up to her room a little later. “I don’t envy your son,” she said, talking about the choice Lucian would need to make.
“Yes, I can only hope he finds love in whoever he picks.”
Then Soroyan kicked the door closed behind them and proceeded to peel off her clothing.
When she was fully naked, he stood back and let his eyes trail all over her. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone,” he said and while she wanted to ask what about his mate, she wisely refrained. The first time he took her was fast and intense and the second time was so sweet and gentle, that it melted her heart.
"I could get used to you," he said once
again as he drove her to greater heights.
"And I you," she cried out as he sent her senses spinning.
***
"I can't stay," Raven said once again when they lay sated afterward. She was going to miss this.
He nuzzled her neck, making her moan. “It’s just a dream.”
“It’s my life,” she added, not sure who she was trying to convince.
“I know,” he said.
Raven couldn’t help but wonder at how accepting he seemed. Her earlier worry suddenly nagged at her again. And did she really want to spend the rest of her life chasing the Ilyium? Was Soroyan offering more? She leaned upon her elbow to look down on him. The intensity in his eyes never failed to thrill her. Yeah, she could definitely get used to him. "You aren’t offering more, are you?"
“You’ve felt the emptiness in me, I am not whole. I'm afraid I would just suck the life out of you.”
Raven subtly opened all her senses and studied him. She had felt darkness within him and suddenly she saw the hole in his soul, the missing part of him. Why she hadn't realized before? Had she been so hungry for him that she missed it, or didn't want to see it?
It didn’t matter, she suddenly understood. "You and your mate bonded, didn't you?"
Raw pain filled his eyes and he swallowed deeply. "We did," he said. "I should have died with her and our young. I didn't. When Delsie left me, part of my soul went with her. I lost it. I went rogue and … disappeared for over a year on my two older children. When I came back, it was too late, the damage was done.” He lowered his eyes in shame. “I have only been a fraction of myself, until …” his words trailed off but she heard the echo of what he didn’t say. Until her.
Raven's heart wept for him, for his lost mate and children, along with her own. For the agony and the unfairness of it all. She snuggled close and held onto him, letting him know she was there and needing to feel him.
"That’s why you feel the emptiness in me." He closed his eyes and the sadness wafting from him just about broke her.
"I'm so sorry, love," Raven said, holding him close.
Raven drifted off to sleep, the thought of leaving painful. Yet the feelings growing inside of her toward this wonderful male were also frightening, for she knew she was close to doing anything for him.
That thought shocked her. About to fall asleep, her eyes popped open and she studied the room. She couldn’t lose herself in another being ever again, it was too painful when it didn’t work out.
She waited until Soroyan was sound asleep, then waited for another hour, savoring the warmth of his arms around her.
Finally, knowing she needed to go if she was ever going to leave, she slipped out of bed.
Silently, she gathered up all her stuff and after one last look at the beautiful, yet powerful male in her bed, she turned and walked out.
Downstairs, she wrote a note to Tierney and another to her brother, setting them on the kitchen counter.
There wasn’t anything else she could do for Zander, at least not here. Who knows, maybe she’d fine a way to undo the spell on another world, she did know a few people who were very good at witchcraft. Besides, she had seen the way he looked at Chloe.
Outside, Raven sucked in a breath of crisp winter air and a moment later, she drew on her power.
She reveled in the feeling of letting her wings out, but a momentary pang filled her at the memory of the night before, when Soroyan had so lovingly touched them.
She swallowed deeply, an ache in her heart. Then after a last glance at the house, she took to the sky.
Raven flew for a little while, the ache growing wider and deeper the farther away she went. Finally, she steeled herself and attempted to contact her fellow rebel.
“Zales?” she called, using a telepathic connection she hadn’t utilyzed in over twenty years.
Chapter Forty-Eight
Nothing Left
Soroyan awoke just before dawn and even with his eyes closed, he knew he was alone. A desolate, cold void that made what was already there seem even deeper and wider, yawned open. Ready for him to dive in so it could consume him.
What he had with Raven had been good. Too good, really. Since he knew this was coming, he’d tried to prepare himself and not get too attached. That obviously hadn’t worked. Still, he never expected to feel this bad when she left.
Finally, he rolled over and looked at the empty spot beside him. Wow. She had really lit up his soul. Made him feel, more than any other female in his life ever had. Not even his Delsie had made him feel this deeply. You just missed being close to someone. It could have been anyone and you’d feel this way! he tried to tell himself, until he thought of Sin. No, that wasn’t it. Suddenly he felt like kicking himself. You dumb bastard, you should have told her how you felt, made her stay! He should have, but he hadn’t. He couldn’t. She wanted to leave too badly.
No. Mate. Ours! His wolf chimed up, also angry and desolate. Should have kept her. Made her stay! Bound her, she never leave us then.
Soroyan’s heart, filled with loss, clenched at the very idea. He would never have tied her to him, or tried to hold her back from what she wanted—needed to do. He couldn’t. If he did, she’d end up hating him. Besides, the thought of bringing her light into his darkness made him feel sick. No. He could never do that. It wouldn’t be fair. He’d likely end up sucking all the light from her. Just the very idea of changing what made Raven what she was, was reprehensible. Her tough-as-nails, honest strength of character was what he loved about her and he’d never want to break that.
As all these realizations filled his heart and mind, understanding suddenly struck. How is this possible? They were only supposed to have one soul mate, but there was no doubt. Raven was his soul mate, as surely as Delsie had been. Maybe more so. Raven had been his second chance. And he’d lost her.
The light that had briefly filled him up, making him feel whole, had departed with her. Shrouded once more in darkness, Soroyan felt it eating him whole and knew it wouldn’t be long before there was nothing left.
Doesn’t matter. He had a job to do, and a plan to fulfill. He needed to get going and not think about Raven. Yet try as he might, that was impossible. Especially since his heart ached and the tiny slice of soul that remained, was weeping. Even his wolf was pouting.
With a growl, he pushed it all aside and climbed from the bed. Then gathering his clothes, he dressed and without a backward glance, left the room. On the way down the stairs, he patted his pockets and found he still had Tierney’s keys.
Soroyan stealthily made his way through the house until he was outside. He breathed in the crisp morning air, aware of the wolves standing guard. There were four nearby, and they took shifts of four hours before trading off with another four wolves. Another five wolves circled the property a little farther out, again, taking shifts.
The Raizarch wolves had offered to take a shift, but since they weren’t familiar with the area, it had been decided it was best if they didn’t. Soroyan, still in charge of the wolves on guard duty despite his status as king, swept the perimeter, all senses on alert. He didn’t see or hear anything unusual and refrained from making eye contact with any of his wolves. Instead, he made his way to Tierney’s car, got in and drove away. He had his nephew’s mate to go retrieve.
Chapter Forty-Nine
Return
After talking to Zales, Raven turned and flew back the way she’d come, knowing she’d made a huge mistake in leaving. Suddenly anxious to return to a certain turquoise-eyed male who stirred her blood, she wasted no time. The sun had just risen, shooting pink streaks across the sky. It was a similar sight to many she’d seen in a lot of other realms, and one she hadn’t taken the time to enjoy in a very long time.
Raven hastened her pace, suddenly wanting to share each and every sunrise and sunset with Soroyan from here on out. If he’ll have you! The thought momentarily sent her heart thumping, but she pushed the idea away. She’d felt his response to her.
Raven landed and without stopping, shifted into her human form, uncaring who might be watching. With a smile, she hurried into the kitchen to find Tierney at the counter with the letter Raven had left in her hand.
“You came back!” Tierney dropped the sheet of paper and hurried over. There was a huge grin on her face as her niece hugged her.
Raven hugged her back, suddenly teary-eyed. “Yeah. I tried to leave. It didn’t work.”
Tierney chuckled and pulled away, eyes sparkling. “Well good!”
Just then Lucian walked in behind her. His blue-green eyes searched around the kitchen, then landed on her. “Have you seen my father?”
“I left him sleeping,” Raven said.
Lucian turned to Tierney. “Your car is gone.”
“What? No—” No! Heart in her throat, Raven turned and rushed up to her room. She slowly walked in and stared at the empty bed. “No. No!”
More dread unfurled inside of her at the sneaking suspicion of where he’d have gone. She recalled the acceptance in his voice when she said she had to leave and hurried back downstairs and into the kitchen. “He’s not here.”
“He could just be up on the mountain, running or walking,” Tierney suggested.
Raven shook her head. “No, he talked about having a plan, and … I think he’s gone to get Toren’s mate back.”
“A plan?” Tierney asked with a frown.
Raven nodded.
“He went back there by himself?” Lucian asked with a scowl.
“I think so,” she whispered, horrified at the thought.
“Yeah, that sounds like something he’d do,” Tierney added, then seeing the look on Raven’s face, she winced. “Sorry.”
“No, you’re right,” Raven said, heading to the door.
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