by Ana Rosso
Stunned, Alex whispered, “Holy shit!”
“What the fuck?” I was looking at a pair of eyes identical to mine. While I was trying to make sense of what I was seeing, the girl left the room, running to the back of the house. Shit. I have a daughter. One look and I knew deep in my heart that she was mine. Ani turned off the music and the room instantly fell silent. You could have heard a pin drop. I was holding myself back, because the only thing I wanted to do was walk over to that woman and choke her. I’d never hit a woman but right then I was ready. I started moving to her because I needed an explanation, when I heard something that took my heart and squeezed it like an orange.
“Papa Pwetty. Look!” She was running towards me with a laminated picture in her hand. As soon as she got to me, she hugged my leg and I couldn’t hold my tears. I kneeled in front of my baby and didn’t know what to say. She looked me in the eyes and put her chubby hands on each side of my face.
“Papa Pwetty, no cry. You have an owie. Me kiss.”
That was it. I was in love. The kind of love that wrapped itself around your heart and squeezed until you could hardly breathe. The kind that tells you that you would kill or die for that specific person, no matter what.
“I’m okay, baby. Just happy to see you,” I told her.
“Papa Pwetty, no cry,” she kept repeating.
“I’m okay, my beautiful girl. What’s your name?”
“Papa Pwetty, no cry”
“Baby?” I realized that she was looking at me like she was trying to decipher what I was saying and then she looked over at her mom. Lyra instantly started talking to the girl while moving her hands at the same time.
“Baby girl, he is okay. He is crying because he is happy to see you.” Lyra looked at me for a moment and then she told my baby girl, “Why don’t you go and watch cartoons in my room for a while?”
My daughter looked at me and pouted, “No, Momma, Papa Pwetty here. No cantons.”
“Come on, pumpkin. He’s not going anywhere. Please just for a little while.”
“Papa Pwetty no go, pomise,” she asked her mom.
“I promise, Baby Girl. I promise.”
With that she grabbed a blanket and walked to the bedroom. We all waited until we heard the TV come on before all hell broke loose.
“Why the hell did you hide her from me? Who gave you that right? She’s my daughter!” I was yelling at her.
“You told me to disappear. You said you didn’t want to have anything to do with her. The day you said that, was the day she stopped being your daughter, mother fucker. She is MINE!” She was shaking and yelling at the top of her lungs. What the fuck was she talking about? So many things were running through my mind and when I couldn’t take it anymore, I decided I needed a breather and opened the door. As I stood outside, I tried to piece together everything that happened in the fifteen minutes I’d been there. I took out a joint and lit it up. I took a long drag and retrieved my cell from my back pocket.
“What’s up, Son? Is everything okay?” When I didn’t answer, he asked, “Damon, is everything okay? Talk to me!” He was getting more anxious.
“Pops, I can’t explain right now, but I need you to call the Pullman chapter and ask them to send a cage here. Also, please ask mom to get the room next to mine in the clubhouse ready.”
“What aren’t you telling me? Is Ani okay?” At this point he was yelling over the phone.
“Everything’s okay. We’ll talk when I get home. As soon as the cage gets here, we’ll be on our way.” I hung up the phone and I was on my way inside when I noticed a black sedan approaching the house. The car parked by the next house across the street. I wanted to see who it was, but I didn’t have the time. Pullman is only around an hour away from where we were and I wanted to be on the road as soon as they arrived. Walking inside the apartment, I realized everybody was still in the same place they were standing when I left, except Alex who was sitting comfortably on the couch watching TV.
I took a deep breath and looking at nobody in specific I said, “Okay, this is how this is going to go. First, Ani, go and pack for at least two weeks and don’t argue because we are on lockdown.” She gave me a questioning look, but without saying anything, walked to the back of the apartment.
Then I looked at Lyra and said, “You and I need to have a serious conversation and we will, but for now you’re also going to pack for you and … What’s her name?”
“Leslie.” She didn’t even look at me and right then, I was okay with that.
“Pack your things and Leslie’s. While you do that, I’m going to go and talk to my daughter.” She was going to argue, but I didn’t allow her to start. “And don’t you dare say she's not my daughter.”
When she looked at me, she was furious. “Don’t! She is mine and besides that, you are not going to be able to talk to her.”
“Why the fuck not? I’m not a moron. I can talk to a little kid!” I was at the end of my rope.
“Well, if you are a moron or not, I can’t tell because I don’t know you. But what I am trying to say is she’s not going to hear anything that you say.”
“Really? She looks like a very smart kid. I’m sure she will understand me.”
“Okay. Scratch that. You ARE a moron. She’s deaf, asshole.” She stood there with her hands on her hips challenging me to say something else. I had no clue what to do with that, but I definitely knew I wasn’t going to give her the satisfaction of seeing how much she shook my life with what she’d said. I turned around and walked to the room where I saw my Leslie disappear into a little while ago.
As I entered the room, I quickly realized it was Lyra and Leslie’s room. When my baby saw me, she jumped on top of me and hugged me tight.
“Papa Pwetty, you see cantons with me?”
I nodded at her and then sat on the bed with her. Without moving her eyes from the TV, she crawled onto my lap. My heart was going to explode. Suddenly, I felt moisture fall down my check and realized that I was crying. What the fuck? I don’t cry. For the next hour, we sat there together, watching TV while her mom packed, never looking my way.
“Brother, the cage is here!” Alex yelled at me from the living room.
When I went to stand up from the bed, I realized Leslie was asleep in my arms. I kissed the top on her head and inhaled. She smelled like baby and lilacs. Closing my eyes, I thought about all the time I had lost with her … time I would never get back. Again, I considered choking her mom. I controlled my rage the best I could and with her in my arms, I walked to the living room.
“If you guys have everything you need, we got to hit the road.”
With that, I walked outside to talk to the prospect from the Pullman chapter. Alex put all the bags in the back of the van and walked to open the door for the women. In that moment Lyra looked at me and said, “We need to bring her little table.”
“We don’t have enough space. Get in the van before I put you in.” I was about to lose it.
“NO. She needs that and besides, I’m nothing to you, so why don’t you take Ani with you and leave us alone?”
She really had another thing coming if she thought I was going to abandon my baby girl. I was so mad! I didn’t really care if I was hurting her feelings or not when I said, “If you don’t want to come, it’s okay with me. I’ll take my family and protect it.” I closed Ani’s door and got in the front of the van with a sleeping Leslie in my arms.
“Where are you going with her? Stupid macho caveman asshole. Give me my daughter!”
When I looked behind her, I saw this man getting out of the sedan. He was coming our way and when he was near, he called out to Lyra. She turned around and gasped. “Kevin, what are you doing here?” she asked nervously.
“I was just passing by. Is everything okay? Do you need my help?” he asked. There was something about this guy that I didn’t like and when I was about to get out of the van, Lyra turned around, got in and closed the door. I ignored her and relaxed in my seat. It was
going to be a very long five hours home.
Lyra
As soon as I saw Damon getting in the van my whole body went cold. That child was my life, and I realized he could try to take her away from me. I would kill him before I let that happen. I got in without saying another word. Between everything that had happened in the last hour and seeing Kevin in front of my apartment, I felt like my head was going to explode. I dared to look towards the front of the van and noticed Damon was texting. His face was so hard, I was scared shitless. I had no idea what was going to happen. We were leaving Spokane when Ani started talking. She didn’t shut up until we were close to our destination. Damn! The girl could talk. The entire time, Damon was just answering her in monosyllables, but it didn’t faze her. She was her bubbly self, like she knew everything was going to be okay. I, on the other hand, needed someone to tell me what was going to happen next. Of course, I didn’t dare to ask. I didn’t want to stir that pot, because let’s be real, I was impulsive, not stupid.
Since it was night, I couldn’t see anything outside, but that didn’t stop me from staring out the window. I wasn’t really looking at anything. I was actually planning my next move, which I was going to have to do as soon as we arrived at the fucking clubhouse. The five-hour drive went fast, and in a blink of an eye, we were arriving at the clubhouse. As soon as the van stopped, I noticed that a truck was following us. I freaked out, reached for Ani’s hand, and squeezed hard.
“Don’t worry the truck is just transporting their bikes,” she said in my ear.
Unfortunately, that didn’t make me feel better. I wasn’t afraid of someone following us, I was afraid of the one in the front of the van. What was he going to do as soon as he puts my daughter down? Suddenly, I saw a shadow near the front door of the building with his back to the wall, smoking a cigarette. He threw the butt on the ground, and after crushing it with his boot, started walking to the van.
He looked at Damon while he was getting out of the vehicle, and stopped when he realized that Damon was carrying a sleeping Leslie in his arms.
“What the fuck? Can you explain this?” He asked while pointing at my daughter.
“Not now, Pops. Did ma do as I asked? Is the room ready? I need to put this angel to bed,” he told him, walking to the side of the building without looking back. I quickly opened the door and ran after him.
“Where are you taking her?”
He turned around and looked at me with so much hate that I froze. “To bed. I’m using the side entrance. I don’t want her to see what is going down in the main room.” Then, he turned back around and kept walking. The door opened into the bright kitchen. There were a couple of women cooking. Immediately, they looked our way with a question in their eyes. He didn’t even flinch and kept walking down a hallway, until he stopped in front of a door and unlocked it. He quickly opened it, and inside was a full size bed, an armoire, and a chair in the corner. He went to the bed and softly nestled Leslie in the middle of it. After he kissed her hair, he turned around and walked out of the room. Without a word, he opened the door across the hall and went inside. He appeared back with four pillows and a thick blanket.
He put them around Leslie, turned and looked at me and said, “Your bags are on their way. Get some sleep and we’ll talk tomorrow.”
“Where’s Ani? I want to talk to her,” I screeched. I didn’t even care; I was about to have a tantrum like a three-year-old kid.
“Tomorrow. She’s with her mom now.” Okay, I was acting like a baby but he was treating me like one.
When I was about to close the door, I saw the trashy Barbie I had seen him with before. She walked over to him like she owned him, and seemed completely caught off guard when he closed the door in her face. She stopped momentarily in front of my door, glaring at me with hate in her eyes, and then turned and started down the hall. Just as I was about to shut my door, she raised her hand over her head, pointing her middle finger high in the air. I wanted to grab that damn finger and break it right off her hand, but I let it go. I was exhausted and in no mood to deal with that crazy woman.
I went to the bathroom that was adjoining to the room and took care of my business. There was a knocking on my door. It was one of the prospects with our bags. After he left, I took a hot shower, brushed my teeth, and put a T-shirt on and yoga pants. Checking to see that Leslie was sleeping, I turned my phone on and noticed there was Wi-Fi. I quickly started searching for taxi’s nearby or the very least, a hotel in walking distance. I decided to wait until the noise from the party had died down. Two hours later, I grabbed our things. I tucked Leslie into a blanket, took her in my arms and opened the bedroom door. I looked both ways down the long narrow hall and when I was sure the coast was clear I started walking to the kitchen. Suddenly, she woke up and looked around, catching me in the middle of my grand escape. I had no idea how she’d done it. Maybe it was instinct, or maybe she was a small little psychic, but when she realized we were leaving her daddy behind, she started yelling at the top of her lungs.
“Papa Pwetty. I want my Papa Pwetty!” she shouted.
Shit. In an instant his bedroom door flew open, and he came running towards us. He was shirtless, and his jeans were half open. I shamelessly glanced down at his waist, quickly noting he was going commando when I spotted the tip of his cock peering past his zipper. I couldn’t stop myself from staring. It was gigantic, making my panties nearly melt away. Oh my God. I’m such a freaking whore. I gave myself a mental kick in the ass and tried to take off running. In a couple of strides, he was by my side grabbing my arm.
“Where the fuck do you think you’re going?” he growled.
Before I had a chance to answer, a big guy came close to us and asked, “Brother, did you call a taxi? I just saw through the cameras there is one at the front gate.”
Damn.
Damon took a crying Leslie from my arms and started walking back towards the room. Without turning around he informed me, “If you want to leave, that’s up to you but you’re not taking my girl with you.”
“I can do whatever I damn well please, and in case you have forgotten, she is mine!” I snapped.
Without another word, he put Leslie back in the bed, and she instantly fell back to sleep. He then came over to me and pushed me into the room. Before he closed the door, he glared at me one last time. “Get your ass back in that bed, and go to fucking sleep, woman.” Then, he closed my bedroom door and locked it on the outside. When I realized I was trapped, I went directly to the bed, cuddling with my beautiful daughter, and I tried to sleep. Two hours went by before I surrendered to a very unsettling slumber.
When I finally woke up, I was alone in the room. Panic overcame me with a vengeance, and I started shaking like a leaf. I jumped from the bed and tried the door knob. It was open so, without thinking, I ran out into the hall in search of my daughter. I heard laughter coming from somewhere in the front of the place. When I got there, I stopped in my tracks. My beautiful girl was surrounded by several men in leather, and they were all laughing at her antics. She was sitting on top of the bar with a huge plate of pancakes in front of her. While she was stuffing a fork full of pancakes into her father’s mouth, she was talking nonstop. Then she looked to me and started moving her little arms for me to come over to them.
“Momma, come. Papa Pwetty is eating all his bweakfast so he can gwow big.” She was holding a fork in front of him, and he was obviously enjoying himself.
All eyes turned to me and I shied away. In that moment Cora came to me and with a big smile she said, "Hi, Lyra, it's good to see you again. Thanks for giving me such a beautiful granddaughter. I hope this time you stay.”
I was completely muted. I could only smile at her. I was just about to walk over to my daughter when she looked at me and frowned. “Momma, put some pants on, young lady!”
Damn! I completely forgot I took off my pants last night before going to bed. I was only wearing a long T-shirt. In a second, I turned around and ran back to our room. After ge
tting dressed I went back to retrieve my daughter. She was watching cartoons in her daddy’s lap. I stood in front. When he stared at me, for a brief moment, I saw the same tenderness that drove me to him the first time. I knew he was angry, he had every right to be, but the way he looked at me made me think there was something more than anger. It was just for a second but it was enough to fill my heart with hope. I didn’t know what to think. I only knew that we had to talk because I did what I did because of the text he sent me.
“Come, Baby Girl. You need to take a shower and brush your teeth. After that you can come back and watch cartoons.”
She didn’t want to at first but her dad put her on the floor and patted her on her little bottom. She looked at him and after he nodded, she turned around and started walking to the bedroom. Fucking monkeys on a string—just what I needed—she was seeking his approval. I was so jealous, I had to stop myself from turning around and flipping him off. When we finished with her morning routine and after a small fuss about how she wanted a dress not jeans, we went back to the big room. It was completely deserted, with only a prospect cleaning the bar. Without looking directly at me, he told me Cora was shopping for some things and all the men were at church. He also said I could go wherever I want inside the perimeter of the club, but to avoid the front gate—per Damon’s orders. Really, I couldn’t believe the nerve of that man.
Without knowing what to do, I decided to take Leslie for a walk. As soon as I opened the back door, I couldn’t believe how beautiful it was outside. While Leslie was running like a lunatic, I sat down at one of the picnic tables. I had been here many times before but usually at night. For the first time I became aware of my surroundings. The clubhouse was a huge three story log cabin that was built in the front of the property. It looked like it has been a bed-and-breakfast once. It had a beautiful porch that went all the way around it. In the back of the property were three more log cabins. Each one as beautiful as the main house. The club on the inside was nothing like the one that I spent so many years in. In the main room there was a big bar to one side, and on the wall behind the bar was a replica of the patch that adorns the back of the members’ cuts. It was the Grim Reaper with his hands crossed over his chest, in one hand was the scythe and on the other was an old parchment roll. Three leather couches and a couple of tables were close to the entrance and two pool tables in the back. There was a giant flat screen TV on one wall and the others were decorated with bikers’ paraphernalia. The kitchen was an industrial one. It was the dream of any person that enjoyed cooking. On the second floor, there were at least fifteen bedrooms and a big game room for the kids. The last floor had eight big bedrooms that belonged to the officers.