by Ana E Ross
“Is this your bedroom?” Michelle asked with a ‘need-to-know’ look in her eyes.
“Yes. This is where I spent my childhood. Most of it.” He reached behind her and locked the door. “Come lie down with me for a little bit.”
“You think that’s a good idea? I mean with the way we feel about each other?”
“Do you trust me?”
“Yes.”
“Then trust that I will respect you. As much as I want to, I’m not going to make love to you, Michelle. I just want to hold you close to me.”
“But Precious—”
“Dad and the staff will take care of her. We’ve been going all day. I just need a little quiet right now. No more conversation about anything, okay? Just let your mind relax and go wherever it wants to go, and let your heart feel whatever it wants to feel. But don’t say a word.” He put a finger to his lips. “Shh.”
Michelle nodded and let him lead her over to the bed. She watched as he kicked his sandals off then knelt on the carpet and lifted her feet from hers with warm skillful hands. Except for Robert, no man had ever shown her such gentleness, such simple caring. Her heart swelled within her.
He stood up, pulled back the blue and white comforter and eased down on his side in the middle of the bed. He reached out his hand and pulled her gently down next to him, facing him. He smiled into her eyes then clasped his hand at the back of her head and pressed her face into the hollow of his neck.
He smelled wonderful, she thought, as his arms and legs wrapped around her and he tucked her into the strong warmth of his body, fitting them together perfectly. His arousal was evident, and even though her heart was beating out of control, the intense anxiety for sex wasn’t there. Instead, she felt a deep satisfying peace wash over her. He was like a drug.
Maybe she was tired. She didn’t know. But one thing she did know was that she’d never felt this safe, this secure with a man before. She’d never had this kind of intimacy. She never even knew it existed.
Ryan only held her when he wanted sex and right after he was done he’d pull away from her. At nights, he’d roll off of her, turn his back and begin snoring almost immediately while she laid in the dark looking up at the ceiling still waiting for something wonderful to happen. He never held her, never asked her if it was good for her. He just seemed not to care.
Michelle placed her open palm against Erik’s chest and closed her eyes. She knew that when they did make love, Erik would hold her. He’d caress her. He’d make sure it was good for her.
Maybe that was it: Ryan had sex with her. Erik would make love to her.
Every nerve in Erik’s body begged him to strip them both naked and make love to Michelle for the rest of the day, all night, into the early hours of dawn, until they were both too satiated to twitch a muscle, until Michelle couldn’t tell her sweet juicy backside from her brown sugar nipples.
But years of practicing restraint gave him the strength to hold this lovely irresistible woman in his arms and not go the distance.
He had Cassie to thank for that. She’d been old-fashioned, so sex before marriage was not an option for them. As a young man, he had to learn to control his sexual desires when most of his friends were scoring on a regular basis. It’s probably why he started running ten miles a day. He had to release that energy somewhere.
Cassie’s choice to remain pure had taught him to respect her, and all women in general.
It was many intimate moments like this one that had strengthened the bond between them. Not giving in to their needs had taught them to trust themselves, and each other. They’d grown to know each other’s bodies so well, and built so much tumescence during their courtship, he’d imagined their wedding night would be tantamount to a volcanic eruption.
Sadly, it was barely satisfying, probably because they were both virgins. It had gotten much better during their marriage, but he was still waiting for that big bang, the one he was sure he would experience with Michelle when the time was right.
Erik closed his eyes and embraced the sound of Michelle’s heart beating next to his and the feel of her warm breath fanning his throat. He tightened his hold on her as slumber pulled him under.
***
About an hour later, Michelle opened her eyes to find Erik leaning over her with a pleasant smile on his face. “We slept together,” she said, noting the remnants of sleep in his eyes.
“That we did. How do you feel?”
How did she feel? She thought for a moment. “Respected and respectful.”
Erik laughed so hard the bed shook. He ran a finger along her cheek, pausing to linger at a corner of her mouth. “Well, there’s only so much respect I have and so much temptation I can resist, so…” He swung his legs over the opposite side of the bed and walked around to put on his sandals. “I’ll go find Dad and Precious while you freshen up. The bathroom’s through there.” He pointed at a closed door.
“What do we tell them when they ask where we were, what we were doing?”
“We’ll tell them the truth. We were napping.” He walked over to the door and opened it. “Don’t be too long,” he said, stepping out and closing it behind him.
Michelle turned on her back and stared at the ceiling. She couldn’t believe they’d just been locked away in a bedroom, slept in each other’s arms and he hadn’t touched her.
“Well, that’s not entirely true,” she corrected herself as she abandoned the bed and walked into the bathroom. He had touched her, in the most intimate part of her being. He’d touched her heart and her soul, introduced her to a deeper, more meaningful experience to which no physical contact could compare.
He was the most extraordinary man—make that person—she’d ever met. No wonder Bridget Ashley and—she was certain—many other women she hadn’t met were fighting for his attention.
He was worth fighting over. She smiled, feeling in her heart that she wouldn’t have to fight for him. All the signs told her that if she played her cards well, he would choose her when he was ready.
As she emerged from the bathroom, Michelle scanned the bedroom with her eyes. Erik’s presence was everywhere. Life size posters of famous athletes and banners of various sport teams were showcased on the blue-green walls—perhaps the way he’d left them before he went off to college, she thought.
She stood in front of a mahogany dresser laden with trophies and medals he’d won in cross-country and sprint races at Granite Falls School. He’d told her that he ran to keep the weight off, but now she realized that running was really a passion for him.
“Hey, are you coming out anytime soon?” she heard Erik ask from outside the closed door.
“In a minute.” Michelle picked up a brush from the dresser—Erik’s brush—and fixed her hair. She slid a finger across her tongue and creased down her eyebrows. Satisfied that she looked decent again, she shoved her feet into her sandals and opened the door. “I was admiring your trophies,” she said to Erik.
“Oh, those.” He shrugged.
“Yes, those. You didn’t tell me running was your passion.”
He gave a seductive smile. “I have many passions, Michelle.”
“I’m sure you do,” Michelle said slyly.
“Where are you taking me tonight?” she asked as he took her hand and led her toward the back of the house.
“To a very special place. You’ll like it.”
“Have you already asked your father to watch Precious?”
“Nope, but it wouldn’t be a problem.”
“Wouldn’t he be surprised that you want to take your daughter’s nanny out on the town for a romantic evening?”
He chuckled. “He’d be surprised if I didn’t. Are you forgetting his reaction when he met you this afternoon? He’s not stupid.”
But I am, Michelle thought as her heart skipped a fast beat. What the heck was she doing?
***
“You look beautiful.”
Michelle pulled her gaze from the window of the restaurant over
looking Crystal Lake to admire her date in a green silk sports-shirt and dark slacks. “Thanks. And thanks for bringing me to this lovely restaurant,” she added, looking around the packed room. She wanted to add ‘expensive,’ but that would be too cheesy.
She’d almost choked at the prices on the menu. Even the appetizers they had decided to skip were in the double digits. This would definitely be the most expensive meal she ever had.
“Andreas is the best in town—in food and venue. This dining room is far less formal than the one upstairs. I’ll take you upstairs on our next trip.” He smiled. “Tables are booked months in advance with a non-refundable deposit.”
“So, how did you get one at such short notice?”
“I know the owner, Adam Andreas. He was one of my three best friends growing up, and still is. This location is the first of what is now an exclusive international chain of hotels and restaurants. Andreas has been a hit since opening night.” He paused. “I used to come here a lot with...”
“It’s okay, Erik,” Michelle said when his voice trailed off and a faraway look came into his eyes. “You can talk about Cassie.” She reached across the table and laced her fingers with his. Yesterday, she probably would not have been so bold. But after the intimacies they’d shared today, she felt confident enough to initiate physical contact with him.
“I don't want to talk about Cassie tonight. Let’s talk about you instead.”
“Me?”
“You and your father. Is he the one who hurt you, Michelle?” His fingers tightened about hers.
Michelle’s throat dried up. She took a sip of water. The absolute last person she wanted to talk about was her father. She tugged her hand from Erik’s and folded her arms across the table. “There’s nothing much to talk about.”
“There might not be much, but there is something. Every time I bring him up, you get nervous or quiet. Can you not forgive him for turning his back on you after your mother died?”
Michelle dropped her gaze. There was only one way to end this constant barrage of questions about her father. After what they shared today, she felt she could tell him anything. He said he wanted her to trust him, and strangely enough, she did.
She swallowed the anxiety in her throat and raised her lids to find Erik watching her with tenderness and patience she’d seen only in one other man—her brother.
CHAPTER TWELVE
“My father didn’t just ignore Robert and me, Erik. He used to hit us.”
His jaws tightened and the gold specks in his eyes that had beamed with patience just a moment ago, now glowed with fury.
“That is until Robert was old enough to fight back,” she continued when he said nothing. “Even when I was older and Robert wasn’t home to protect me, he let into me.”
“He hit you. Your father hit you,” he said through clenched teeth.
Michelle watched his hands ball into fists on the table. If her father was anywhere close by, Erik would kill him with his bare hands.
When she’d told Ryan about her abusive childhood, he’d rolled his eyes and said, ‘Lots a kids get beat up by their parents, Michelle. Mine knocked me around. You’re not special, girl.’ Ryan had merely confirmed what she believed all her life—she wasn’t special.
She’d never felt special until this afternoon when she’d fallen asleep in Erik LaCrosse’s arms.
“If he wasn’t already dead, I would kill him myself,” Erik stated in a cold voice.
Ice spread through Michelle’s stomach. How would he feel if she told him her father was not really dead but a drunk who had stolen her debit card and wiped out her bank account? Last week, she’d finally told Robert what their father had done, and he wanted to find the man so he could beat the crap out of him.
She’d also relayed Yasmine’s idea that he wasn’t really their father. Like her, Robert had brushed it off as absurd since Dwight Carter was the only man he remembered being in his mother’s life. He’d never had any other father.
Michelle took another sip of water. “Well, you don’t have to kill him, Erik. Fate already took care of him.”
“Good evening, Madam. Dr. LaCrosse, I’m your waiter for the evening.”
“Good evening, Derek,” Erik said to the young boy. “How are your parents and sister?”
“They’re fine, thank you.”
Erik turned to Michelle. “Derek’s father is a local police officer. His baby sister was my first delivery.”
“And she lived to tell about it,” Michelle murmured, drawing chuckles from the men.
“Give them my regards,” Erik said.
“I will.”
“Is Mr. Andreas around?”
“He’s in Italy. I’m sorry.”
“Perhaps I’ll catch him next time.”
“Would you care to order something from the bar before dinner?”
Erik turned querying eyes to Michelle.
“Just a club soda with a twist of lemon for me, please.” She ignored the puzzled frown on Erik’s face, frustrated that she couldn’t explain. But after seeing what alcohol had done to her father and how it had caused him to almost completely destroy her life, Michelle had stopped drinking. Alcoholism was a disease that could be passed down through genes. She didn’t want to be anything like him.
“I’ll have the same,” he said. “And we know what we want for dinner. You can take the order now.”
Derek pulled a pad from his apron and wrote down the order. “Excellent choices.”
“I’d like to freshen up,” Michelle said as soon as Derek left.
The look in her eyes told Erik that she felt uncomfortable about what she’d just told him about her father. He stood up and held her chair then motioned for a nearby attendant to escort her to the women’s room.
As he watched her wind her way through the crowded room, the thought of a grown man beating up on her curdled his blood. He wondered where she got the strength to have survived and still be so emotionally and psychologically sound. He found himself comparing her to his fragile Cassie whom he knew would not have survived such horror. She probably would have curled up in a corner and died.
Michelle was a strong woman, no doubt about it. Yet, when he’d held her in his arms this afternoon, she’d felt like a vulnerable child in need of love and protection. He wanted to eradicate all the pain from her life, but he had to bury one woman before he awakened another.
He was almost sorry he’d brought up the subject of her father. It had really dampened the mood. For the rest of the night, he wanted happy thoughts. No more morbid discussions.
He rose again as she approached the table. She looked beautiful in a pale-pink slip-dress that buttoned down the front. It was simple, but he found it extremely elegant. She had good taste. She also looked more relaxed, he thought admiring the delicate features of her face as she blessed him with that sweet smile that took his breath away every time.
“It’s a beautiful night. Maybe we’ll go for a walk on the landing after dinner?” he said as he held her chair for her.
“I would like that.”
Derek brought their drinks and told them their dinners would be right out.
“Erik? Erik, Is that you?”
Erik looked up. “Bryce.” He grinned when he saw his old friend.
“I didn’t know you were in town,” Bryce said as they embraced.
“I just got in today, actually. Brought Precious up to see her grandmother.”
“I’m really sorry about your mom. I visited her when she was hospitalized.”
“Yes, Dad told me. Thank you. She’s home now.”
“It’s the best place for her.” His eyes finally shifted to Michelle.
“Bryce,” Erik said, reading the questions in his eyes. “This is Michelle Carter. Michelle, Bryce Fontaine, the man who owns half of Granite Falls. I’m sure you saw his name over every building as we drove through town today.”
“He’s exaggerating,” Bryce said, taking the hand Michelle offered. “It’s
always nice to meet Erik’s friends. And I must tell you, you’re the most beautiful one so far.” He kissed the back of hand.
“Thank you,” Michelle said, placing her hands on her lap and smiling demurely at the compliment.
“How long will you be in town?” Bryce asked Erik.
“Until Sunday, hopefully. I didn’t get a chance to call the boys yet.”
“Well Adam and Massimo are both in Italy on business. Give me a call tomorrow. We could putt a few balls at the country club for old time’s sake. And I’m sure Jason would love to see Precious.” He paused. “When are you moving back home, man? We all miss you.”
Erik chuckled. “I’m seriously thinking about it, Bryce.” He’d been thinking about it for about a year now. But he was happy he hadn’t, or else he wouldn’t have met Michelle.
“What’s to think about? Just do it. I’ve taken up enough of your evening. Give my regards to your father, and Danielle.” He turned to Michelle and bowed. “It was lovely meeting you, Michelle Carter,” he said before turning and disappearing as quickly as he’d appeared.
“That’s a very large man,” Michelle said.
“Oh, but extremely harmless. He’s also a widower. Lost his wife a few years ago. Unfortunately, he wasn’t as lucky as me?”
“What do you mean?”
“They weren’t married long enough for her to give him a child. He still isn’t over her.”
“You’re also still in love with Cassie,” she said softly. “I see it in your eyes each time you talk about her.”
“I will always love Cassie, but it doesn’t mean I can never love another woman.” He curled his fingers around his glass of club soda. He could really do with a stiff drink, but he didn’t want to make Michelle uncomfortable. He knew why she didn’t eat red meat. He wondered at her reasons for not drinking alcohol. Anyway, he liked that she didn’t. It wouldn’t be good for his babies when he finally put them inside her. He held up his glass. “Let’s make a toast.”
“To what?”
“A newly discovered friendship—one I hope will deepen into something special and last for many, many years.” He chinked his glass to hers.