Skin

by Dale Mayer

  She gave an indelicate snort. “I’d never had it pointed out in quite the same way before. I’d have considered myself on the small side, but not like this.” She placed a hand on his thigh, feeling it tighten into granite under her gentle touch. “You’re so different from me. Your skin is thick, rough; your muscles – powerhouses.”

  “We’re meant to be that way.”

  She nodded thoughtfully, loving the way his thigh twitched under her fingers, almost playing a rhythm. She stroked down over his kneecap, marveling at the sheer width of the joint. Hers would fit completely inside his with room to spare. “It’s hard to believe the massive build.”

  “It’s required to hold this massive body up,” he said, amused. “Your kneecaps would crumple under my weight.”

  She couldn’t argue with his logic, her hands now both stroking, learning, and feeling the differences between them. Loving the differences between them. And even more – loving the freedom between them. She sighed. “I know it embarrasses you, but I have to tell you that the artist in me finds you to be a perfect model.”

  “Model for what?”

  “Everything.” She lowered her head and dropped a kiss on his thigh. The smooth muscle twitched, so she did it again and again. She laid her cheek down on his thigh, looked down the long expanse of leg, and realized his toes were wiggling. She grinned, shifting so she could see his face. He lay with his eyes closed, accepting, allowing…

  “You’re a gift, you know.”

  Startled, he popped his eyes open, “What?” He shook his head. “Hell no, I’m just a normal man.”

  “One who’s willing to lie here like this? That makes you special.”

  She slid her hand up to the edge of his boxers and stroked along the elastic edge. He bit back a gasp and she smiled. Exploring further, she let her finger slide toward the bulge in the center and watched in awe as it grew beside her fingers. She glanced up at Kane to find him watching her carefully. Then she closed her hand around him. He groaned and arched his head back.

  She released him. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

  He gave a garbled laugh, grabbed her hand, and placed it back on his shaft, wrapping her fingers around him again. “You didn’t hurt me.”

  She moved her fingers experimentally. “Are you sure?”

  “I’m sure. It feels wonderful.”

  “You don’t look like you’re enjoying this.”

  This time, he managed a full laugh. “Really, so how does this feel?” He slid his hand over her thigh to caress her bottom, his long fingers cupping her cheek before searching for and locating the silky thong strap between her thighs.

  She froze at the first touch of his fingers and moaned softly at the exquisite sensation of his rough finger over her delicate skin. She moved her hips, pushing her cheeks against his hand.

  “See, it feels good, but an almost-painful good.”

  “Yes,” she whispered. Emboldened, she squeezed gently, loving the strangled sound escaping from his lips. “Like that?”

  “Just like that. And like this.” Once again, he covered her hand and moved it up and down the length of him.

  She’d heard of hand jobs, had seen movies of women between the men’s legs giving blow jobs. She understood the mechanics but hadn’t understood the lure. Now, for the first time, she understood.

  She slowly withdrew her hand, loving the way he lifted his hips to follow her. She dropped a kiss at the top elastic band. “I think you’re wearing too many clothes.”

  “Then take them off, baby.”

  The way he said ‘baby’ brought up shivers of desire and had her reaching out, snagging the material and pulling it down over his hips. Her gaze caught on the thick organ lying nestled in dark curls. Then, as if knowing it was being observed, it rose up and waved.

  She swallowed hard, her mind consumed with the evidence of something she hadn’t considered until now. As she removed his boxers and threw them onto the floor, she realized she had to put a stop to this. She stood beside him, now lying nude on the bed, with full expectations of something good to come out of this, but…

  “Kane, I hate to tell you this.”

  She stopped, and he rolled his head toward her. “What’s the matter, Tania?”

  She motioned to the huge erection that both fascinated and now alarmed her and said, “You aren’t going to fit.”

  *

  Kane grinned then laughed and finally, unable to contain his amusement, he howled. He snagged her arm and tugged her on top of him, then held her head firmly while looking deep into her eyes. He said, “Do you trust me?”

  Immediately, she nodded.

  “Right. So trust me a little further. I will fit.”

  She shot a dubious look at the lower end of the bed, but she was now lying on top of him and couldn’t see his anatomy. Good thing. He’d been unable to get the image of being buried deep inside her tiny body since this started. He should have considered that this stage would cause some cold feet but would have bet that fear, not doubt that this would mechanically work, would have been what set her off.

  This one he could work with.

  He rolled over so they lay side by side and looked into her eyes. Seeing the cloudiness in their dark depths, he said, “Please.”

  After a long moment, she whispered, “I’m willing to try but you have to understand… I might not make it.”

  He nodded. He knew that already. He could be in for the most frustrating time of his life, but he’d survive it. If she was willing to give him a chance, he could do no less.

  In a slow, easy motion, he rolled her over onto her back. “Good. I think that considering I’m completely nude, you should be, too.

  Her gaze widened as her shirt was flipped over her head and…and holy crap. She didn’t have a bra on, and the most perfect pair of small, round breasts lay before him. He feasted his eyes on her. “Tinkerbelle, you are gorgeous.”

  Pink tinged her cheeks.

  “Thank you,” she whispered. He studied the nervousness in her eyes. “It will be fine, Tania. I promise.”

  She relaxed slightly. “I hope so.”

  He lay down beside her and tugged her into his arms before he kissed her.

  Her lips opened immediately, and she wrapped her arms tightly around him. He knew what it took for her to take this step. He was humbled by her trust and was determined to make it good for her.

  He kissed her senseless, exploring her lips, feasting on her mouth, smoothing tantalizing kisses across her cheeks and chin before coming back to drown in her nectar again and again. His hand stroked across her belly and traced the line of her ribs before finally cupping her breasts.

  She arched beneath him, crying out.

  “Shh, it’s okay.” But she twisted beside him, her body ready even if her mind wasn’t. He lowered his head and tugged first one nipple then the other into his mouth. Such beautiful breasts deserved his attention, and he wanted to savor the opportunity.

  Tania shivered and twisted. She had no idea what was happening to her. When he slipped his fingers through the patch of curls, she cried out and squeezed her thighs shut. He coaxed her thighs apart and slid his fingers into the dampness.

  “Oh God, Kane.”

  “I know. Take it easy, sweetheart. It’s supposed to be like this.”

  She flipped her head from side to side. “How can this be good? The tension…I feel wound-up, tied up in knots.”

  He slipped one finger inside, and her hips arched as she cried out again. He worked a second finger inside, cursing at his own urgency. She was so damn tight. He dropped his forehead on her flat belly and took several deep breaths. He could do this.

  He pulled his fingers out, then thrust them in and back out. Sliding lower down, he pulled her thighs wide enough apart to make a place for himself, and he tasted her.

  She shrieked. Her hands burrowed into his hair. “Oh, God, what are you doing?”

  He smiled and replaced his fingers wit
h his tongue.

  She exploded seconds later, crying out as she rained all over him. He lifted himself up, fitted himself to the heart of her, and slowly entered.

  She twisted and turned, pinned in place by an indomitable force. He searched her features but there was no fear, no panic. But something had unsettled her.

  Inexorably, he slid deeper and deeper.

  “I can’t. No more. You don’t fit.”

  Then she said the words that broke his heart. “Please, stop.”

  He shuddered in place, denial screaming through him. He was desperate to plunge in and finish this, her cries be damned, but he knew he couldn’t do it.

  Sweat beads popped out on his forehead, and he lowered his head until it rested on hers.

  Then he closed his eyes. His body gave another long shudder as he regained another measure of control.

  She whimpered. “I’m sorry.”

  “Shhh. Don’t be.” He didn’t want her to be sorry. She’d taken such a huge step already; saying the wrong thing now could set her way back.

  “I am, though.” She opened her tear-filled eyes, and he felt her ‘sorry’ like an arrow to his heart. She figured it was her. There was such defeat in her gaze. Shame. “I can’t do this. I won’t ever be able to do this.”

  She started to weep. If there was ever anything guaranteed to kill his ardor, it was that. But he’d be damned if he’d let this be the ending. She could do this, but she had to know she could, and in order for that to happen, she had to trust him.

  “Tania, easy, sweetie.”

  She sniffled.

  He shifted to the side, sliding his hands down to her hips, and snuggled her tightly against him. He’d be dammed if he withdrew completely.

  “Is this better?” he murmured, dropping kisses on her cheek, her nose, and finally on her mouth.

  She nodded, shifting her hips experimentally. “I’m sorry,” she said again.

  He smiled. “Don’t be. Look at how far you’ve come.”

  She frowned, shifted again, and looked down at their fused bodies. “Are you still inside?”

  “I am.” Just not very far, unfortunately.

  “But…” and her frown deepened as she tried to think it through. She wiggled a little more, and then grinned. “I can feel you in there.”

  “I should hope so,” he said with feeling.

  “So, you do fit?” she asked cautiously a moment later.

  He laughed. “I said I would. It’s just so new to you. And yes, I’m big and you’re little, but we fit together just fine.”

  “Only you’re not as big as you were before, right?”

  And damn if she didn’t tighten her inner muscles. His response was immediate. Her eyes widened and she shifted again, then again. He rolled over so she was lying on his chest and gently nudged her up.

  She sat up and gasped.

  He shuddered.

  “Oh my.” She shifted from side to side then tilted her hips forward and back. Her inexperienced exploration was going to kill him.

  “That’s…different.”

  “Ya think?” his voice came out gritty and deep. A ripple slipped down his body.

  “Oh, you like that, don’t you?” She leaned forward, her hips lifting.

  He groaned and grabbed her hips to stop her from lifting off completely. As she sat down again, he groaned, and she smiled, a sweetly enchanting female smile.

  He knew he was in trouble. She lifted and lowered herself again and then repeated the motion. Each time, her movement settled her slightly lower and he went slightly deeper. Oh, dear God.

  A deep sigh slid from his chest. “Yesss,” he whispered. “Sooo good.”

  He opened his eyes to see her face tilted to the ceiling, head back, long hair drifting down her back. But it was the look of inner concentration on her face that caught and held his attention. She was beautiful at any time, but like this, riding after something she didn’t understand but knowing she was on the right path, she rode faster and faster and…stopped as her body exploded. She cried out and came to a shuddering stop.

  “No.” He gripped her hips and drove upwards, once, twice, and a groan ripped out of his throat as he climaxed.

  She collapsed down on top of him and closed her eyes.

  “I did it,” she whispered. “Finally.”

  And fell silent.

  Chapter 22

  Tania woke up hours later, alone.

  She shifted to study the room and almost cried out at the unexpected achiness. How come she had to pay after something that felt so good? And froze.

  Oh, dear God. They hadn’t used birth control. With everything else going on, her mind had been worrying about so much already that she hadn’t once considered the issue. She fell back, scared.

  Her instinctive reaction was shock. Her mind was saying this was not the right time, and she flinched. Hadn’t Kane’s wife said something similar? No, they weren’t in the same situation. She’d been married, in an obviously steady sexual relationship, and should have had some method of birth control that worked for them. And Kane had likely thought she’d had some protection, but he’d never asked…and God help her, she’d never even considered the issue once.

  As she laid there, her fingers splayed over her belly, it was hard to be upset. She’d wanted children since forever. If it turned out she was pregnant, she couldn’t do anything but see this as a gift. It was not how she had planned it, and it was not how she would have chosen for it to happen, but thinking of a tiny child growing inside her right now made her toes curl with joy.

  What would Kane think?

  After his wife’s actions, she knew how he’d feel about it. He would take responsibility and be willing to step up, but that’s not what she wanted. She didn’t want a child between them to be a responsibility. She wanted such a thing to be a joy. Beautiful. Special. Wanted. Yet she knew she’d love this miracle child, if she was so lucky, enough for both of them.

  Then reality returned. Her cycle was due to start in just a couple of days, so chances were good she wasn’t pregnant. It had happened to other people – but she wasn’t that lucky.

  It would be better at this point if she weren’t pregnant. Liar. She’d be delighted if it turned out she was. Still, there couldn’t be any more of this without responsible birth control. She had no idea which way to go, or even if there would be another incident. The seminar would be over tomorrow. They had all day to work on the projects before presenting them to Jenna just before noon. The afternoon would be a summary of the course, and she and Kane would be the last to present their homework. Thank God. She hadn’t finished or made it anywhere close to finishing the project.

  She scrambled out of bed and grabbed her laptop. It was after dinner. In fact, it was almost bedtime. She opened her laptop to find a note tucked inside from Kane.

  Instantly, she gave a happy sigh. He hadn’t left without a goodbye.

  “Hey sleepyhead. I’m going to get dinner and will bring back something for you. If you want to call me, here’s my number. Otherwise, I’ll be back soon.”

  Her heart melted. Not only had he not been gone long, but he’d thought of her enough to bring her something to eat.

  Then they had to do their homework.

  She turned on her laptop, grabbed her camera, and started downloading pictures.

  There were hundreds. While waiting, she stepped into the shower but kept her hair up and out of the water. She didn’t want to sleep with it wet, and if Kane was coming back, she really didn’t want wet hair to dampen his ardor.

  In the water, she slowly moved the sponge across her body, wondering why everything felt so different, alive. As if his touch, their lovemaking, had awakened millions of nerve endings she’d never known about.

  Considering the physical differences, she had to stop and consider – how did she feel mentally? Emotionally? Spiritually?

  Standing under the heavy force while hot water beat down on her skin, she smiled, letting the water w
ash over her. She felt…wonderful. Renewed. Her heart was exploding with happiness, joy, love, and yes… relief. She’d made love with Kane. Sure, she’d had a little freak out, but with his help, she’d pushed through to a surprise ending. She’d never thought it could be that good. Sure, she’d heard other girls giggling over their sexual encounters and sharing stories – something she couldn’t ever imagine doing about Kane. He was too special, the stories too intimate, the emotions too overwhelming. No matter where she and Kane went as a couple, she’d always be grateful for what he’d done.

  He didn’t want her gratitude. She knew that instinctively, but he had it regardless – forever.

  She didn’t know when the first tears started. Once started, though, she couldn’t hold back and they cascaded down her cheeks to blend with the hot water beating down on her face. Then she started to sob. She wrapped her arms around her chest and cried.

  She couldn’t even begin to voice the outpouring of emotion. But as if a huge scab had been ripped off – a premature scab, as if the wound underneath hadn’t reached that point of healing – the pus buried deep inside poured out.

  The hot water beat down on her body as she cried for the little girl she’d been back then, for the lost years of innocence and for the many years in between when she’d existed in only half a world. The years after where she’d tried hard to be normal but had been faking it all the way.

  She hadn’t known how badly damaged she’d been until now, how thin and fragile her psyche. Now, her deepest fears had been opened and the darkest poisons festering inside released.

  Time passed. She didn’t know how long she’d stood under the water. She hadn’t been aware that she’d dropped to a crouch, rocking herself back and forth, until strong arms grabbed her.

  She shrieked and flailed her arms.

  “Easy, Tinkerbelle, it’s just me.” Kane’s voice washed over her, and she collapsed, sobbing against his chest.

  “Sorry,” she whispered over and over again. The water was turned off, and she was bundled up in a towel and carried out to the bedroom.