No Repeats

by Emily Hudson

  ‘Err!’ The only sounds Ethan was able to convey as he continued to rub his head. ‘Come on, stop feeling sorry for yourself, you need to phone Marcus, he needs to have a plan. He can’t let her get away from him.’ Draining some more water down his parched throat.

  ‘It's not our business to interfere and you’ve been watching too much from the Hallmark Channel.’ Shooting to her feet.

  ‘It is our business, they’re our friends and they’re both miserable; that in turn will make parties, birthdays, even Christmas, miserable for years to come; we have to do something.’

  ‘I don’t know what to suggest, it’s not like he can kidnap her.’

  ‘Oh that’s perfect!’ She said to his shocked reaction. ‘She’s always said someone would have to sweep her off her feet, he could really do it.’

  ‘Oh my goodness you’ve gone mad woman, you do realise that what you are proposing is considered illegal in, I dunno, 99.9% of most countries.’

  ‘Oh, pish posh, I’m sure it’s every country; they’ll thank us for it and if not, at least we tried.’

  * * *

  ‘Well? Well?’ Alicia persisted as Ethan emerged from their bathroom having been on the phone to Marcus for a good quarter of an hour.

  ‘Well he listened and…’

  ‘And?’ she begged

  ‘He doesn’t think you are completely certifiable, just slightly crazy.’ He teased.

  ‘Oh shut up, what’s he going to do.’

  ‘He’s going to kidnap your best friend and he’s going to make her fall in love with him. Is that what you wanted?’

  ‘Stop it, she’s already completely head over heels. Oh this is perfect.’

  ‘Don’t worry he’s got a plan and we need to play our part. So what I need you to do when she leaves is this…’

  * * *

  ‘You look lovely.’ My best friend said greeting me with a cup of coffee.

  ‘Thank you, before you get ideas, it’s not intentional, it’s about the only thing that fits and it’s going to be hot today.’ Rumour had it, the UK was going to experience a heat wave over the next week. ‘Great timing, this heat wave.’ I said.

  ‘Could be worse, you could be 38 weeks pregnant!’ I cringed at the thought. Still, having rifled through my suitcase, I was glad I’d found this tried and trusted favourite dress. Black with a solid white stripe across the bottom, it had a V neck that accentuated my now increasing chest size, coming off the hips beautifully in an A line that ended a little higher than the knee. Yes, I felt good about myself, this morning, this was my type of power dressing. I hadn’t solely dressed up with Marcus in mind, though I’d lying if I said he didn’t factor into my attire choice just a fraction. I’d also received an email from Carole, apologising for contacting me whilst I was off sick but she needed to inform me of some developments within the company and asked if I could touch base; it made sense, what with meeting Marcus, that I dealt with it beforehand. The office was only a short walk from the coffee place I’d arranged to meet him at anyway. So after a very light breakfast I headed off.

  Carole was almost unrecognisable, well in persona anyway. Already waiting when I arrived at the office just before 9am. ‘Darling, my, you do look washed out. I got your extended doctor’s note, but I’m afraid this just can’t wait. Come and take a seat.’

  Over the course of the next forty minutes, Carole explained that at the staff meeting this morning she would be announcing her decision to sell the business to another established management company. I can’t guarantee what they will do with the premises, staff? Our lease is up soon, the staff could find themselves offered jobs and redistributed throughout their other offices. It’s almost certain everyone will be reapplying for their jobs but that won’t be my concern, I will have no further involvement with the business. I wanted to give you the heads up, it hasn’t gone without note who keeps this place running in my absence, who picks up the pieces when someone runs off in a tis. Now I could put a word in for you and ensure that recent absences don’t affect your re-evaluation. Alternatively, I’m offering you a deal that will have to remain within these four walls.’

  My mind was running at a hundred miles an hour. I knew I’d out perform most based on a matrix redundancy system but what with my recent sickness record and obvious future circumstances, I didn’t need this.

  ‘Go on.’ I asked inquisitively.

  ‘I need to make this very clear that at no point can you discuss this with anyone within this company, the deal with be null and void, you would forfeit any payment. I am not offering a settlement agreement to anyone else.’ Acknowledging her serious nature, I nodded. ‘I remember this bright, young girl, confident little upstart, straight out of University that I interviewed and upon being asked ‘Where did she see herself in ten years from now? Her answer came without hesitation. “Sitting where you are now.” Well, we’ve come as far as we can, I can’t teach you anymore. Yes I’ve been tough on you but every single time you have risen to the occasion. It’s your time. I’m offering you an opportunity, the rest is up to you.’ She sat back gauging my reaction. ‘I’m listening.’ I said keenly.

  ‘Do you understand the basics of a settlement agreement?’ I nodded, it was a payoff, I knew the principles, I just didn’t know why. I knew I didn’t warrant it for a bad reason. ‘Your contract with Spectrum Events will be terminated, a favourable reference supplied along with the payment of …’ she passed a piece of paper with £36,000 written on it. I took a gulp. ‘In addition you may also continue to use the following contacts.’ She passed me another sheet, with the name of five companies on, I was pleased to note one being the most recent company I’d secured work from in Edinburgh. ‘Of course, the decision is yours, I understand if you can't make a decision now.’ She said, but with that look that told me it would be appreciated if I made my mind up in the next thirty seconds.

  ‘Carole, I don’t know what to say, this is beyond generous, I’d be a fool not to take it.’ A smile tried to crack through her botox filled face.

  ‘You don’t want some time to think?’ She questioned, puzzled by my speed in decision making.

  ‘No, I’d just like to know, why me?’ Breaking into her characteristic cackle she got up from her seat, to look out of the window.

  ‘I honestly see potential in you and I don't mind telling you, you were the one only person concerned enough to drag me out of my pit of despair, you don’t know how close I came to…’ she said thoughtfully, still staring out her window. ‘Well never mind, that’s by the by. I’m pretty sure you had your own problems going on. I’m not blind to everything, Lucy. I’ve sacrificed everything for this business and what for? That bastard Roger is going to take half of it anyway, so at least, some good will come of it. So you can go your way and I, darling, I am going to take a very long holiday.’ She said finally facing me. ‘Oh, before I forget, she’s a little wet behind the ears, but I know you can whip her into shape, I’m sure she would appreciate a call.’ Pausing she added ‘You might need her when the baby is born?’ Taking the sticky note with the telephone number of Jennifer, Carole’s most recent victim.

  ‘It’s babies, twins but how did you know?’

  Laughing she said, ‘Oh darling, I didn’t until then, you’re never sick and you probably don’t realise but you have been stroking your stomach for the last twenty minutes.’ I looked down and true enough, I was still doing it.

  ‘Twins, that must have been a shock, well you’re definitely going to need her. Now if you don’t mind I need to inform the team that you have tendered your resignation. So if there are any personal affects you need to take, please do so. You probably have ten minutes before the Bitches of Eastwick come in. Oh and you’ll receive payment in your next pay check, I trust that suits.’

  I nodded, still chuckling at her apt description of my now ex-colleagues. Getting up I had a strange compulsion to hug her, a mere thank you, didn’t seem enough. Initially phased by my touch she relaxed to accept the warmth.
‘Thank you so much for this.’ I said backing out of the door. Resuming her position behind the desk, she shooed me away with her dismissive flick of her hands.

  Hunting around the office, it didn’t take me long to find an empty box. It felt weird rifling through my drawers, but this was everything I had dreamed of. I was finally getting the opportunity to start up on my own. I’d still need the help that Licia had offered but I’d be less dependant on my best friend. For the first time I could see that things were coming good. This was a good day I thought as I buoyantly left the building, box in hand.

  I’m ready for you Marcus Davenport, I’m ready for you.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Even after a gentle amble I was still forty-five minutes early for my meeting with Marcus. Plonking my box on top of my favourite table, I ordered and settled in to enjoy my coffee in the relative peace and quiet. Calm before the storm I told myself. In truth, I had absolutely no idea how Marcus was going to take this meeting but it was only fair we clear the air.

  I’d actually had quite a productive half hour. Still buzzing with adrenaline, I'd researched office space to rent and phoned Jennifer who was really excited to meet up, once I’d explained I was setting up on my own. I’d been so wrapped up in my planning, I’d not noticed the comings and goings, until a dark shadow blocked out my light. In all his glory Marcus stood watching me.

  ‘Sorry, how long have you been there?’ I flustered as if he’d caught me up to something.

  Grinning, his stare failed to abate. ‘It doesn’t matter, I could look at you all day.’ Exaggerating a sigh and rolling my eyes, I hope I’d made it abundantly clear that his so called charm was not going to work; at least he hadn’t come with a ridiculously outrageous gift. ‘Can I get you anything?’

  Looking longingly at my empty coffee cup, I knew I wanted more, but what you want and what is best for you rarely go hand in hand. ‘Just a water please.’ The length of the queue gave me the opportunity to compose myself, I hadn’t banked on being been thrown so much by his arrival; taking a few deep breaths I tortured myself a little longer as I looked on at what could have been as he hopped from foot to foot. Marcus has never failed to be anything but heart-stoppingly handsome. Today in his dark washed denim, charcoal grey t-shirt and jacket he had the attention of every female behind the counter falling over themselves to serve him.

  Returning without the drinks, I looked at him confused. ‘Oh they’re going to bring it over.’ Shaking my head, I laughed. ‘What?’ he asked with all innocence.

  ‘I bet they are.’ Never in the years of frequenting this place had I ever had table service.

  Low and behold his coffee, my water and some pastries arrived shortly delivered by the young barrista who’d served him. Though now she seemed to have developed a compulsion to flicker her eyelashes like Daisy the Cow as she explained the reward card to him and added that she’d popped on two stamps for today’s visit. Marcus to his credit seemed completely oblivious, polite but still blissfully unaware of her attraction, which in truth surprised me, considering his reputation. Secretly, I quite enjoyed the fact he only appeared to have eyes for me but pretty quickly chastised myself. Remember he’s fathering someone else’s child. Yep, that did it, as I felt the bile rise.

  ‘You look beautiful today,’ he said once our young barista had finally got the hint and slunk off back towards her counter to swoon from a distance. ‘Not that you don’t normally,’ he backtracked. ‘What I’m trying to say, is you must be feeling better.’

  I was aware I was probably blushing, so much for composing myself. ‘Can we not Marcus, please.’ The smile instantly wiped from his face.

  ‘I’m feeling much better thank you, as for the rest of it, you don’t need to say it, is that clear.’

  Fiddling with his cup, Marcus looked down and visibly taking a breath, no doubt counting to ten after my somewhat officious start. Looking up, his eyes revealed an intensity that made me shiver.

  ‘I meant it last night Lucy, nothing has changed for me, in fact you have made me the happiest…’

  Stopping him abruptly, he couldn’t continue saying what he was going to say.

  ‘Stop Marcus, you need to hear me out first. You need to understand, I don’t want anything from you, we are not your burden. I don’t need anything from you.’ Running his hands threw his hair I could see his exasperation. ‘Don’t do this Lucy, you can’t cut me out of their lives, I’m their father, I need to be involved, I want to be involved, hell I was just about to tell you, you made me the happiest man alive. This is not just about you, what are you going to say to them when they’re old enough to ask about their father?’ His voice was getting louder as his agitation increased.

  ‘Shh, keep it down, I’m not doing this here. I just need to make it clear that we are not your responsibility.’ Even though I was saying it and meant every word, a stray tear rolled down my cheek, quick to wipe it away, I hoped he hadn’t noticed.

  ‘I’m sorry Lucy, that isn’t acceptable to me. My father was so remote whilst I was growing up he might not have existed. I don’t want that for my children.’

  Instantly I felt a pang of guilt, of course he wouldn’t find it acceptable, he’d spoken at length about the arms length his parents kept him at whilst we were clearing Kitty’s house. ‘To be honest, it’s not what I want ideally either but you have other responsibilities and soon enough your’e going to have your hands full. So, what I’m saying is that we don’t have to add to them. I don’t expect anything.’

  His forehead knotted into a frown. ‘What are you talking about?’ he asked.

  ‘You had a life before…us and well what I’m saying is you can go back to it.’

  Still confused, he banged his cup down, splashing the table with the remnants.

  ‘I’m sorry Luce, I still don’t understand. Finding out that you are carrying my children, was yes, a shock and I wish I’d found out another way, but please don’t think I ever want to go back to a life without you or them in it.’ His words cut me to the quick, in any other scenario I would have jumped into his arms. Instead, trying not to sob, I failed comprehensively. Attempting to stifle my feelings only resulted in me making a sound, so strange, that it caught me off guard, clamping my hand over my mouth I tried to hold back the inevitable. It was too late, my whole body shook, damn these hormones! Turning away from him, I hoped to at least spare a little dignity, last thing I wanted him to see was my ugly cry baby face. As I twisted out of sight, as quick as lighting he came around to my side of the booth, his hands smoothed over my shoulders slipping down my arms as I silently whimpered.

  Holding me tight, he drew close, nuzzling his head in my neck. ‘It’s ok baby.’ He soothed. ‘It’s ok.’

  It wasn't ok, nothing about this was ok. Firstly, I was meant to have more resolve than this and secondly, I was taking far too much enjoyment in his comfort. There was something about the way that he wrapped his arms around me that made me never want to leave them. I felt so safe in his hands. It wasn't fair, why couldn't he be mine and mine alone. Sadistically I allowed myself to enjoy his warmth a little longer as he continued to use comforting words to console me. Until!

  ‘I’m sorry you’re finding this so hard and I know my reaction didn't help but try and see this from my point of view, you just upped and left.’

  Suddenly my blood began to boil. I shifted out of his grasp, moving along the bench, hackles raised, with the wall now at my back I should have felt a little trapped but all I could sense was anger.

  ‘Well it hasn't exactly been a picnic for me either.’ I snapped. His head dipped, aware of just yesterday’s events.

  ‘I just don’t understand Luce, why couldn't you talk to me?’ He said in a hushed and reticent tone.

  ‘Why?’ I shrieked a little too angrily. ‘Maybe discovering that you’ll be fathering another child the very night I was planning to tell you about ours, might have put a little dampener on it. You seriously need to rethink where you purcha
se your condoms from.’ I said more than a little spitefully. ‘It was one thing to overhear that she was worried about telling you but then, to get asked my opinion as to how she should tell you.’ I shook my head as I revisited the hell that was that night. ‘She’s beautiful by the way but I hope you’ll understand I cannot be the other woman and our children will not play second fiddle to anyone.’

  With my hand on my head, I looked up to the ceiling. ‘I’m not exactly sure how this is going to work, I suppose we’ll have to sort out something for when they’re born but I can’t think about that now. I’m too tired.’

  Finally meeting his eyes, I saw a look I didn't understand. ‘For what it’s worth, I hope you’ll be very happy.’ I added.

  ‘Oh I’m going to be.’ he said looking at me intently. His words cut deep, looking away I felt the colour drain from my face. Reaching out he he cupped my chin gently bringing it back to face him. ‘I’m going to marry the woman I love, she’s going to be the most amazing mother to our children and though I know she would have wanted this to happen under different circumstances. I can definitely guarantee, we’re going to be happy.’

  Feeling sick, I couldn't understand why he was being so cruel and why the hell was he smiling? Plucking all the strength I had, ‘Well I won’t stand in your way. At the end of the day I'm nothing more than a one night stand, let’s face it.’ I said as bravely as I could well aware that my eyes were probably red and swollen by now.

  Getting up from the bench, I hoped he would be gracious enough to let me past. Though at this point I wasn’t beneath crawling under the table in order to escape.

  ‘Sit down Luce.’ His body language oozed calmness, but his eyes, I couldn't make him out. ‘I said sit…please.’ Not wanting to cause a scene and too exhausted to argue, I sat.