by Emily Hudson
Chapter Twenty-Eight
What a perfect day! I had to keep pinching myself; I was trying hard not to let myself get carried away with my feelings but as the hours ticked by that was getting harder and harder. My heart accepted this was what life would be like with Marcus. Unfortunately, my head had the annoying habit of attempting to remind me we were locked away in a beautiful bubble, tucked away in the idyllic Cotswold countryside and everything would burst the minute we got back into some assemblance of real life.
Arm in arm striding down an historic high street, lined full of expensive looking boutiques, was as far away from reality as I could get. I was an unemployed, homeless, single ‘ish’, mother to be, with hormones currently going haywire, as I clung to the bicep of this incredible man. So charming, kind, supportive and persistent, the last thing I wanted to do was confuse the feelings I had for him with those of my circumstances. I suppose that’s the issue; I should feel vulnerable; in all honesty the highly strung me of a few months ago would be on the edge of a breakdown, feverishly constructing lists of how I’d get myself out of this mess. But right now, in his arms, it didn’t matter. Marcus’ much coined phrase, “We’ll work it out,” seemed to instantly calm me. Marcus’ confidence made me believe anything was possible. Though niggling at the back of my mind, however, was the tireless hours both of us would have to put in to establish our new businesses, the distractions these two little babies would provide and then there was “us”. Looking up at the man, who hadn’t let me go, his eyes smiled as he returned my look; “us” was something I could begin to believe in.
‘Here we are!’ he stated opening a door and guiding me through the shop threshold. Stepping inside, I was blown away, everything a mum and baby could possibly dream of. My eyes could barely take it all in.
‘This place is beautiful.’ I said, standing and taking it all in. His grin was wide, admitting that he’d sought Livvy’s advice. There were racks and racks of beautiful baby clothes. The first thing to catch my eye, a stunning white all in one with little stars dotted on it. Clutching it off the rail, I couldn’t believe how small it was, checking the label it stated ‘Newborn’ turning the tag over, I nearly fainted. How much?
It was at that point the sales assistant came across. ‘Can I help you?’
Just as I was about to dismiss her, you know the usual, “we were just browsing” spiel, Marcus excitedly pipes up with pride. ‘We’re expecting twins in December.’
‘Oh congratulations.’ She cooes as if it’s the first time anyone has ever come into the store for this reason. Hiding my eye rolling, I turn back to the babygro.
‘We’d like to pick up a few bits for the babies but more importantly some maternity clothes.’ He states with his arm on my shoulder, bringing me back to the conversation.
‘Certainly, I am pretty sure I have that style in pre-term, I’ll just check.’ Marcus and I turn to each other, mouthing pre-term? As our assistant wandered back to her storeroom. Suddenly the realism hit, what if our babies are born too early? What if they have problems? Immediately, my hand drew protectively to my stomach. As if he could read my mind, he took he into his arms and just held me. No false promises to give, neither of us knew what was in-store but as he held me I knew whatever it was, we’d tackle it together.
‘Here we go!’ Our bouncy assistant said as she returned. My hand shot to my mouth as she held out the minuscule piece of clothing. ‘So tiny.’ The pair of us looked on in awe, were our babies going to be this small? ‘So you’ll probably need a dozen or so of these, so you may like to look at some other styles and I’m not sure if you’ll be interested but you could consider setting up a gift registry, particularly if you’re having a baby shower?’
My eyes were wide I was still doing the maths in my head, calculating a small fortune. ‘That’s wonderful, if you wouldn’t mind getting us some information on the gift registry, we can continue looking around.’ I said, absorbing my real thoughts.
As she left us alone, I blew out the breath I’d been holding.
‘Just tell me you like them, forget about the money.’ Marcus said intuitively.
‘I love them, but seriously, it’s not just the cost. These babies are going to wear them for what, a few weeks or months at the most, before they move on to the next size. They are only going to poo and puke on them and I’m sorry but I’m not cleaning them, if we have a massive ‘poomageddon’.
‘Poomageddon?’ He said with raised eyebrows.
‘You know, when it goes everywhere, down the legs, up the back…’ His face was priceless.
‘Enough! I get the point.’ He said laughing. ‘How about a compromise, we get a couple in each size, for best.’ I smiled as he reached for another pair off the rail, I wasn’t about to ruin the moment by telling him that babies or their bodily functions had no concept of keeping things for best. I suspect, this baby lark is going to be a steep learning curve, for both of us.
‘Come on, lets get you sorted.’ Moving me swiftly away.
By the time we had finished and despite my continued protests, we’d left with; goodness knows how many babygro’s, two pairs of jeans, several tops, a couple of dresses and a coat. Surprisingly I’d offered up very little resistance when it came to him to flashing his plastic, wising up, perhaps, to the battles I could win. Everything Marcus and the sales assistant passed through the dressing room felt amazing but more importantly I actually felt stylish, dare I say it sexy? Far from the floaty beached whale look, I’d envisioned but hey, it is early days! Looking down at the multiple bags Marcus had placed in the boot of his car.
‘So much stuff. Where are we going to put it all?’
‘Trust me, this is just the beginning, when I went shopping with…’ he tailed of.
‘It’s ok.’ I reassured and it was, now I realised Livvy was his sister, it was fine.
‘I was just going to say the amount of stuff she ordered shocked me, knowing Livvy I’m sure it wasn’t all necessary but for one thing she wanted there was a six week lead time. I know this is happening quickly but I think its just something we should consider particularly if these guys sneak up on us early.’ Closing the boot, he led me round to the front passenger seat. Turning to face him as he opened the door, I stood on my tiptoes, clasping my hands around his neck, kissing him gently on his lips. ‘Thank you.’ I said releasing my grip.
‘What for?’ He honestly enquired.
I wanted to shout it from from the roof tops! For wanting to be part of these babies lives, for holding me, for making me feel fantastic, for not letting me run away and do this on my own and most of all for sharing my fears and understanding. But I didn’t say all those things, perhaps I should have. ‘For just being you.’ Seemed to please him enough as he settled me into the car.
‘Do you fancy a drink or anything?’ I shook my head. ‘I’ve just realised I’m parched. I’m just going to pick up something from that newsagents we passed, you don’t mind, do you? I won’t be long. Why don’t you phone Alicia, wave the white flag.’ He said with a wink and that’s exactly what I did.
‘Since when have you shopped in Victoria’s Secret?’
‘Ha ha! You found them then.’ Alicia laughed down the phone. ‘What there was of them, yes! Personally I think it’s positively obscene for a woman, pregnant with twins, to wear this stuff.’ Pretending I was taking some moral high ground with my best friend.
‘I bet Marcus doesn’t agree.’ Well I walked straight into that one, as I considered my answer, the seconds ticked on.
‘Ha! I knew it! 'They’re back together.’ I heard her shout out to Ethan, with what sounded like a high five slap that followed. ‘You are, aren’t you?’ Sounding a little less confident with her assumption, I put her out of her misery.
‘Yes we are.’ Her shrill scream was enough for me to hold the phone from my ear. ‘Of course you are, you’re perfect together.’
I bit my lip. Were we, perfect for each other?
‘So where’d he ta
ke you?’ I filled her in on our Cotswold haven and the bizarre coincidence of meeting his father.
‘We’re expected at his parents’ house, tomorrow for lunch, to say things are moving quickly is beyond a joke.’
‘Well you’ve only got yourselves to blame.’ She laughed.
‘Yeah, yeah, I know. It’s just weird. I feel guilty that his parents know before mine, does that make sense.’
‘Your parents aren’t stupid Luce, they know something is up. The minute you turned up on their doorstep, closely followed by Marcus, you started them worrying; not to mention my incessant phone calls. Why don’t you phone them tonight? Put their minds at rest. I’m going to have to go honey but I promise you, they’re just going to be happy that you’re ok.’
‘Licia?’
‘Yeah?’
‘Thanks.’ I could see her smile down the phone.
‘Fairytales do come true, gorgeous.’ With that, she was gone, the line was dead.
‘I take it from that smile, you got through to her.’ Marcus said settling into his seat. ‘Uh huh.’I said with the same fixed grin on my face.
‘You get what you wanted?’ I said looking down at his empty hands.
‘Oh yeah, like I said, I was really thirsty. You forgiven her?’
‘She said we were perfect together.’
‘Did she now?’ Raising his eyebrows grinning as widely as me. ‘I have to say, I agree with her. What else did she have to say?’ Not comfortable to divulge the fairytale advice. I confided about my feelings about my parents.
‘We could FaceTime them or Skype them if you like. If it’s something you want to do on your own, I’ll understand, I can set it all up and disappear. Anyway, have a think about it, you can decide later.’
It is official, I don’t deserve him, I really don’t. I knew we couldn’t drive across the country and tell them face to face but Marcus had thought of the next best thing. I just hope to God they don’t think it’s me copping out of confronting them head on.
‘Right, had enough shopping?’ He asked as I nodded. ‘Time for tea then.’
‘I’d rather coffee.’
He gave a ‘Phfft,’ sound as he put the car into gear. ‘With a cream tea, that’s sacrilege!’
‘Oh my goodness, is this all for us?’ I looked at the mountain of sandwiches and cakes not to mention the size of the scones with accompanying pots of jam and cream. Marcus had taken me to a traditional teashop on the banks of a river. Everything down to the checked tablecloths was perfect.
Time passed quickly, both of us at ease in each other’s company. Eventually we admitted defeat. ‘We made a valiant attempt.’ He joked.
‘I can’t move, I’ve never eaten so much.’
‘Well that’s a shame, because, there’s something I want to show you.’
Taking my hand, he wasn’t giving me the option, hauling me out of the chair he led me outside. The heat was still intense, I was glad we’d been eating inside. It was turning out to be a hot summer, in more ways than one! Still hand in hand, he led me down to the riverbank, nestled below the dappled shade of a weeping willow was a large picnic blanket with a few cushions resting up against it. ‘Oh this is gorgeous.’
‘Fancy getting comfortable?’ A waiter I hadn’t noticed, slipped from behind us, placing a wine cooler down as we settled down to the ground. ‘It’s an elderflower bubbly, didn’t think you’d even want to risk a sip of the real stuff.’ He said as the cork was popped and a glass poured. We looked up, watching as the waiter then extracted the knife from his corkscrew he’d pulled from his apron. Carefully he carved a notch into the cork, handing it to Marcus before making his exit.
‘I hope you agree this is a very special occasion.’ Marcus said as he placed his glass on the ground. I looked on as he fiddled with something and the cork. Curiosity had well and truly got me, I stared on as he continued to wiggle whatever else was half hidden in his hand.
‘It’s been a beautiful day, even though I slept through half of it.’
‘You’ve got the best reason in the world to sleep in.’ He said looking up from his clasped hands. Satisfied, he’d finished whatever he’d started, he smiled raising his glass. ‘To us.’
‘To us!’ After clinking the flutes and taking a sip, he unfurled his other hand. He’d studded the cork with a two pound coin. ‘To them! Two pounds to represent our babies and I checked, it was minted this year.’ I took the coin, a lump in my throat as I considered his thoughtfulness.
‘It’s special because you’ve made me the happiest man alive. I can’t wait to see what our future holds.’
Reaching across he laid a hand on my stomach. ‘I can’t wait to meet these guys.’ Placing the cork on the blanket, I smoothed my hand over his.
‘They could be girls, you know.’ I said with mischief in my eyes.
‘Guys or girls, I can’t wait to meet our babies, you’re just amazing.’
A tear trickled down my cheek as my fears invaded my thoughts. What if that’s all this is about? The babies. What if they’re all that really matters to him?
‘Happy tears.’ I said wiping it away putting on a brave face, I smiled up at him. Could I trust that this was real? I should trust him, he’d done nothing for me to disbelieve his motives but then my defences went up as I drifted off, heavy in thought. I’d been burnt before. What made this different? Propping himself up with cushions against the tree, he made a v-shape with his legs, ‘Luce, sweetheart?’ he said bringing me back to the here and now. ‘Come here.’ He said softly, patting the ground in front of him.
Secured between his legs I settled back against his chest, his arm stretched across my stomach, the pair of us gazing out across the river.
‘I know things haven’t happened, the way convention would dictate but I just want you to know, I wouldn’t change it for the world.’ He leant forward, nestling his cheek into mine. I closed my eyes as he placed his lips there instead. Please let this be real, I silently prayed to myself, please. Neither of us had mentioned the L word, but as I continued to relax into his hold, I couldn’t imagine being anywhere or with anyone else. That had to mean something, didn’t it?
Not sure how long I’d nodded off, but I woke to Marcus shifting behind me.
‘I’m sorry.’ I said, leaning forward, I gently twisted round realising that my weight must have shifted and pinned him to the tree.
‘No, I’m sorry I was trying to get something, I didn’t want to disturb you. I could have sat like that for hours.’
‘I very much doubt that.’ I chuckled.
‘Ok my bum is going a bit numb.’ He admitted, shifting about a bit, he reached into his pocket for something but before withdrawing it, he looked apprehensive. I’m sure my face mirrored his frown.
‘When I saw this, I just had to buy it.’ His silent deliberation ended but I was still none the wiser. Then he pulled out a drawstring pouch.
My heart pounded, I couldn’t work out if I was relieved or not that it wasn’t a box. ‘Please open it.’ Wiggling my finger inside I loosened the pouch and pulled out a beautiful necklace with a pendant of two entwined hearts. I gasped as I held it, the metal glinting in the afternoon sun. ‘Oh Marcus, its beautiful, thank you.’
Reaching out to take it, he delicately tickled my neck with the chain as he reached behind me to fasten it. Looking down I clasped the hearts between my fingers.
‘You and me, we’ve created that, two little hearts beating away, inside you. It just blows me away when I think about it. Twenty little fingers and twenty little toes.’ Rising up on my knees I leaned towards him, every doubt I had disappeared, his lips touched mine, everything about this moment was perfect, he was perfect, dare I say, we’re perfect.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
‘The screen is blank? I can’t see her Mitchell? Why can’t I see her? Is there some buttony thing I need to press? Mitchell, will you just come over here and help. You know I’ve only done this once before and remember what a disaster that
was.’ My mother twittered on, tension beginning to show in her voice as she ratcheted up a decibel or two. We’d established audio contact but it was fair to say my mother wasn’t the most technologically savvy individual.
‘Oh there you are dear.’ She said touching her hair, having just caught the image of herself on screen. My father had obviously worked his magic.
‘Hi Mum, sorry to spring this on you.’ This was probably more of an apology to my Dad, knowing full well he had to set up the webcam on the archaic family computer he refused to upgrade.
‘Is Dad still there?’ I asked since he’d slipped out of shot.
‘Just grab a chair and sit down Mitchell.’ My mother nagged.
‘Hi Puddin’ Pie.’ My henpecked father said having dutifully pulled up a chair.
‘I have to say you look better dear, doesn’t she look better?’ My mother said whilst prodding my father. My Dad winked at me, how he put up with her at times was beyond me, but they worked and who was I to question it.
‘Stop fussing Joan! You said you had something you needed to tell us.’ My Dad always swift to cut to the chase.
‘Please understand I wanted to tell you this in person but it wasn’t right the other day, it's right now and this is the next best thing.’ I knew I was rambling and I wasn’t exactly sure if I was making any sense. ‘I just don’t want you to hear this second hand.’
‘Lucy Jasmine Crawford, just tell us, you’re starting to worry me now. You’re not going to prison are you?’ At that moment, Marcus grabbed my hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. I knew I’d been waffling, but seriously, prison?
‘No Mum, I’m not going to prison.’ My bemused face must have said it all.
‘Oh thank goodness! I’m not sure I could have faced the WI after that. Well…I’m just saying.’ My mum defended herself as my father looked on in amazement at her words. Looking down at Marcus’ hand, still fearing their reaction, I squeezed it back a little tighter. There was no getting away with it, I had to tell them. Why was it so ridiculous that a grown woman still felt this way?