by Eden Summers
Since Tarney returned from college Ethan had rarely been single. There was always a busty brunette or beautiful blonde hanging off his arm. Last time she covertly discussed Ethan’s love life with Jenna, he’d been dating a model or TV presenter or something equally belittling to her ego. That had been almost six months ago, and Tarney tried hard not to pay attention to the comings and goings of women at his house.
They must have broken up. He wouldn’t be kissing her if he had a girlfriend. Poor Casanova must be having a dry spell.
What about Jenna? Her best friend made it obvious years ago that she didn’t want her brother anywhere near Tarney.
She kissed him harder, trying to beat out the conflict between her desire and conscience. Should she finally enjoy being with Ethan in real life instead of forever keeping him in her fantasies? Or listen to her mind and put her friendship with Jenna first?
With lust coursing through her veins like a drug, she couldn’t understand how something so good could be a no-go zone. It wasn’t as if sex equaled a committed relationship. This was just a one-time thing. Surely Jenna wouldn’t care if they had a quickie. She would probably gag, block her ears, and sing “la-la-la-la-la” while Tarney tried to discuss the situation. It wouldn’t really affect their friendship, or at least, it shouldn’t.
She pierced her nails into his skin as their tongues tangled. He replied with a growl, clutching her tighter, possession and greed in every squeeze of his hands. The surge of hunger from Ethan finalized her decision. She would put the unwanted thoughts to the back of her mind and deal with them later.
The weight of doubt lifted from her shoulders, and she took the time to cherish every motion, every touch without succumbing to guilt. She clenched her thighs tighter around his waist, grinding herself against him. He moaned into her mouth, making the heat of her core pulse hotter.
He stumbled while kicking off his shoes, and she opened her eyes, pulling back to find them now in her bedroom. With a steady hand, he supported her weight and flicked the light on with the other.
Holy shit.
This was it. They were going to have sex. She was really, truly going to have sex with Ethan. A mix of utter terror and heightened excitement began to build in her belly as she fixated on his gaze.
“You look scared,” he whispered.
Nodding, she admitted, “Yeah, I kinda am.”
She wanted to be a woman capable of casual sex, but she couldn’t convince herself that she’d be able to walk away afterward when the man was Ethan. He’d held her heart for a long time. Every past relationship slowly fell apart when she started comparing her partners to him. They were never good enough, sweet enough, playful enough.
He studied her face, and the hard length of his erection settled against her sex. His strong hands still gripped her ass. “We don’t have to do this. I just thought—”
“No.” She shook her head in earnest and swallowed the lump in her throat. “I want to…” She paused trying to think of the right words. “It just feels like more than casual sex for some reason.”
He studied her, reading her mind, and touching her soul. “It does for me too.”
With a heartfelt smile, he placed a soft kiss on her lips and walked them to the bed. On his knees, he climbed onto the mattress and laid her down in the middle against the pillows. The back of her skull voiced a slight protest of pain, the twinge barely registering above the heightened awareness of lust. He stroked the side of her face, his fingers trailing along her jaw as he admired her.
It’s not too late to back out, her conscience sounded. The voice was easy to ignore. She’d made up her mind and believed she’d settled on the right decision.
He sat back on his haunches between her spread thighs and removed his Rangers shirt. She stared at him, appreciating the close up view, taking mental pictures from the waistband of his shorts, up the curves and hollows of his abs, and along the straining muscles of his jaw to his glinting eyes. She wouldn’t forget this moment any time soon, and when he left in the morning, she would go back through the album in her mind. Every instance would be savored, every inch of him memorized so the next bout of self-love would be all the more enjoyable.
“Like what you see?” he asked with a grin.
She shrugged. “You’re not too bad. Although I’d probably increase your number of pull-ups from twenty to thirty, you seem to be slacking off lately.”
He let out a bark of laughter and a genuine smile brightened his face. She smiled back, happiness making her eyes tingle with tears she quickly blinked away. With an eagerness to feel his mouth back on her skin, Tarney raised herself to her elbows, and he leaned into her. Their lips met in the middle as he placed his body on top of hers. One strong arm supported his weight, while the other went around her waist, under her back, up to her shoulders.
She squeaked when he tugged lightly on her hair, drawing her head back, exposing her neck. She closed her eyes over the exquisite bite of pain, the dull ache from hitting her head no longer on her radar. He settled into her, his warmth still suffusing her when he moved his mouth away from her lips. From head to toe she shivered in gooseflesh as he teased the erogenous zone at the bottom of her neck. Licking. Nipping. Kissing.
She searched for grounding, first clutching the pillows in grasping fingers, then the quilt, before moving to his hair and gripping tight. The stronger she held, the more ravenous he became, his hard body grinding into her, pulling her hair tighter, sucking her harder. He was marking her, leaving a lasting impression she would admire in the morning.
Ethan’s weight lifted away, and her body protested his abandonment. She opened her eyes and raised her head to watch as he sat back on his knees and undressed. His shorts and underwear came off in lithe movements and like the virgin bride she looked away, her cheeks heating at his nudity.
Nakedness during the heat of passion had never fazed her before, however the situation with Ethan was different. They’d grown up in the same neighborhood, and now they lived next door to each other. Not only would the line on casual sex be crossed, but their friendship was also diving into new uncertain territory.
The mental panic kept her focus away from the erection pointing at the roof, but it didn’t escape her attention when he retrieved a condom from his discarded shorts.
The cocky bastard had planned this! “Having that in your pocket was a bit presumptuous, don’t you think?”
He shook his head, completely unabashed by his action or his nudity. “No ma’am. A fireman is always prepared.”
She sat up to playfully smack him across the chest. Before her hand connected, he grabbed her wrist, pulled her to a sitting position, and reached down to remove her shirt. The sudden vulnerability of being half naked made her skin tighten, and she wrapped her arms around her waist.
Ethan didn’t pause for her insecurities. With devouring eyes, he studied her, grabbing the head of his cock at the same time and giving it a tight squeeze until a drop of liquid pooled at the tip. “Take off your shorts.”
Okey dokey. She sucked in a deep breath and raised her chin in defiance of her own self-doubt. There was no chickening out now. She unclasped her bra and threw it to the floor. Her fingers trembled as she pushed her shorts and G-string over her hips and down her legs. He surveyed her actions, his eyes fixated between her thighs the entire time.
He continued to stare with appreciation, and although her body was raw and exposed, he made her feel desired without saying a word. After ripping open the condom packet with his teeth, he rolled the latex over his erection in a matter of seconds. His confident actions were in complete contrast to the anxious emotions making her shake.
His palms slid up her legs, the heat of his hands scorching every inch they touched. Moving higher, up the insides of her thighs, he held her open, until his thumbs ran down the middle of her pussy, parting her flesh. Her back arched at the burst of pleasure, her core rising to meet his caress.
She wanted to moan in frustration when h
e pulled his hand back. Instead, she bit her tongue, allowing the pain to numb her yearning. Her fingers fanned out to clutch the quilt while his hands traveled over her hips and along her belly. Ethan held her gaze and moved higher, cupping her breasts and tweaking her nipples until the pleasure made her cry out.
“Damn, Tar. Do you know how long I’ve wanted you?”
Was it pillow talk or was he serious? She wanted to ask but his head dipped, the warmth of his breath moving over her intimate flesh like a caress.
“You smell so good, all wet and ready for me.”
As the words penetrated, he lunged with his tongue, licking, tasting. They moaned in unison, and Tarney lifted her hips, wordlessly begging for more.
Ethan taunted her with another slow, soft stroke, and just when she was about to beg for mercy, his mouth moved closer, his lips resting against her tortured pussy.
He blew cool air against the heat. “Say my name.”
She sucked in a breath, needing oxygen to reply. Before she could say his name, his tongue was inside her, lapping, delving with a passion that made her ass rise off the bed.
“Ethan.” The word was a scream. A plea. “Ethan, please.”
Her head thrashed against the pillows as he devoured her, his hands gripping her hips, holding her tight. The beginning of an orgasm tightened her belly, her thighs, her core, and she wanted to beg him for a deeper penetration.
“Not yet, baby.”
He already knew her so well. In the next moment, his weight leaned into her, cutting off her thoughts. Chest to chest they laid, his cock resting firm between her thighs, nudging her entrance. When he took her mouth, she tasted her arousal for the second time. The erotic nature of the kiss shocked her all over again. His lips were fierce and dominating, making her writhe and rub against him, seeking the friction she craved.
The sound of their heavy breathing filled her ears, the moans of passion driving her higher while his erection began to part her sex. One hand gripped her hip as her nails scoured his back, and with an animalistic growl, he thrust home.
This time she couldn’t think to say his name, she merely cried out her pleasure into his mouth. Each moment blended into the next, her body drowning in heightened sensation. The gentle rocking motion of his hips turned into forceful thrusts when her thighs encircled him. His fingers tweaked her nipple gently before gliding down her waist and in between their bodies. When his thumb found her clit, she broke the kiss, her head jerking back so she could gulp for air.
His lips never left her sensitive skin, moving to kiss her neck, her shoulder, and her cheek. Her panting turned into whimpers, the soft mewling sound leaving her mouth without conscious thought. Clinging tight to his shoulders, she worked her hips against his thumb, finding the delicious friction she needed. This time when the urge to cry out became too much, she sunk her teeth into his shoulder, lapping and sucking at his salty skin.
“Damn it, Tar. I’m gonna come.”
She heard his voice, but the words didn’t register. Her mind was already split from reality, moving into a state of carnal bliss. She closed her eyes and floated in rapture. The waves of orgasm pulled at her nerves, taking over her senses. Nothing else mattered except this moment, this man, and the ecstasy he filled her with.
As her peak subsided, she heard Ethan’s guttural moan, his thrusts grew harder, faster, deeper, until his entire body tensed and he called out her name.
His hips slowly rolled to a stop, and she opened her eyes to find him staring down at her. In the small space of time, things between them had changed irrevocably. Now when she gazed into his eyes, she didn’t feel lust and desire. It was something more, something that encapsulated her heart, making her ache with longing. Something she didn’t want to admit felt like love.
Chapter Three
Ethan leaned in close, their bodies still connected as he placed a soft kiss on Tarney’s swollen lips. Fucking hell. He was in deep shit.
Now that the clotting, unrelenting lust had been temporarily sated, he had the clarity to realize how much of a stupid, dumbass he was. His sister was going to kill him, and Tina would castrate him with a blunt knife. Technically they were on a break, so it shouldn’t be any of her damn business.
“What are you thinking?” Tarney’s whisper made him focus.
“Hmm?”
“You were scowling. I just wanted to know what you were thinking.”
He answered her with another kiss on the lips and moved from her body. “Nothing really. Just lost in thought,” he lied. It sounded better than the alternative: I was thinking about my sort-of-ex-girlfriend, who technically isn’t really my ex-girlfriend because we’re on a break, but we don’t speak, see, or think of each other.
Taking a tissue from the box on her bedside table, he disposed of the used condom. He then grabbed his briefs and shorts off the floor and dressed. When he looked back up, Tarney still sat naked, watching him with a pained expression.
“You’re leaving?”
Her soft, sweet tone, and the way her throat convulsed, broke his heart. How the hell would he get himself out of this mess without hurting her?
“I should make a move, Tar. I need to shower, and I left the house unlocked.”
Smooth, Ethan, real smooth. He could have waited longer than two seconds before giving her the brush off. He’d tried to sound sincere, but his rejection hurt her anyway. She turned away abruptly and started searching for something to cover her body.
“I’ll come over in the morning and help you clean up the glass. I don’t want you cutting yourself again.”
She gave a sardonic smile and pulled on her shirt. “Don’t bother. I’m a big girl. I can look after myself.”
Shit. She was really pissed, and rightly so. He only wished he had the common sense to figure out what to do. Tarney had always lived by a high moral code. If she found out he wasn’t entirely single, not only would she be disgusted with him, but with herself too. It wouldn’t matter that his relationship with Tina had been over for a long time. She had gone out of town on a work assignment and barely called to say hello. Not that they communicated much before she left. They both knew their time together was over, so why the hell didn’t he finalize things before she had left? He deserved what he had coming, but he didn’t want Tarney to take any of the blame, and he knew she would.
He walked toward her, grasped her hand, and brought it to his lips. “I’m sorry. I’m a complete mess.”
He looked into her eyes and implored her to listen. “I’ve wanted to be with you for a long time Tar, and now that it’s finally here, I’m freaking out. I don’t want to fuck things up. I don’t want to hurt you. I just don’t know what the hell I’m doing.”
She seemed so innocent, glancing up at him through thick lashes. “So why are you running away?”
“I don’t know…there are things I need to take care of before I can do…this.” Fuck, he was going to hell for misleading her. “Why don’t I go freshen up, lock the house, and come back?” The offer was another stupid move, one he hoped would take the pain from her eyes.
Maybe going home for a while would give him the time he needed to think. God knew he hadn’t done much of it around Tarney. He needed to call Tina and arrange for her to get her things from his house. Then he had to figure out how he was going to hold back his desire for Tarney so he didn’t come on too strong. Fuck, he already wanted to sink into her again—to taste her skin, her heat, her pussy. Self-control needed to bump to the top of this to-do list. He couldn’t let his emotions scare her off, not now, not ever.
A hopeful smile brightened her face, and she gave a slight nod. Feeling like a complete and utter ass, he leaned in, kissed her on the forehead, then grabbed his things and left.
* * *
Tarney showered and changed into a silk nightgown before hobbling around the house for over twenty minutes, and still Ethan hadn’t returned. She had taken her time in the shower, enjoying the subtle aches their lovemaking had produced
, and hoped that if she took long enough, maybe he would return to join her. When that didn’t happen, she’d strolled around naked for a while anticipating his arrival, hoping her nudity would encourage another bout of hot ‘n’ heavy, but it seemed obvious now he wasn’t coming back at all.
It wasn’t as if Ethan wanted to be here anyway. She had played the guilt card when he had made it perfectly clear he wanted to leave.
Resigned to spending the night alone, she walked through the house, ignoring the sting in her foot as she turned off the lights. When the house lay in darkness, she headed for the front door, still unsure whether to secure the lock. What if he did come back? The thought was unrealistic after almost an hour of waiting, but she couldn’t stand the thought of him turning up and finding the door locked.
“I’m so pathetic.”
It wouldn’t hurt to leave it unlocked a little longer. He would never know her desperation if he didn’t turn up. Unable to resist, she peeked around the curtain to look toward Ethan’s house, then frowned when she found his front light on and a car parked in the driveway. Who would be visiting him this close to midnight?
A thick layer of apprehension covered her when she took another look at the car. It was familiar, and not in a “oh, one of his sexy fireman friends has come to visit” sort of way. No, this was more like “holy shit, that’s his old girlfriend’s car.”
Tarney tried to stop her panic from boiling over. Maybe they separated a long time ago and she was merely coming over to visit…late at night. Just because it looked like a booty call didn’t mean it was a booty call. She needed to trust Ethan and stop jumping to conclusions, no matter how obvious they seemed. He wouldn’t do that to her—he wouldn’t cheat on his girlfriend just to have sex with her. He wasn’t that type of guy.
Clenching her fists tight, Tarney tried to control her hysteria as she closed the curtain and walked back to her room. With a forced smile, she snuggled under her sheets and concentrated on the images of Ethan in her mind—the nice naked ones where he stared at her with fierce intensity instead of the visions of another woman in his arms.