In Cassie's Corner

by Mayer, Dale

  "Jessie?"

  Startled, he turned to find his mother staring at him, a curious look on her face as she peered out at him from deep inside the limousine. "Aren’t you getting in?"

  Jessie shook off his reverie. Cassie would have to wait. As much as he’d like to walk her home and make sure she was alright, his mother needed him more. She always did. Today it was understandable. Jessie was all she had left.

  Had Todd felt that way about Dad?

  Always feeling like the adult of the house? Watching as the adults degenerated further into dependency?

  Jessie took his seat inside the limousine and wondered at the showiness of driving to a funeral in such a vehicle. It all seemed so ostentatious. For his mother, it was the ‘right’ thing to do. Todd wouldn’t have cared one bit.

  He was coming to realize funerals weren’t for the dead, but for the living that the dead left behind.

  ***

  Saturday dawned ugly and cold. May showers. Cassie huddled under her covers. She had no plans for the weekend. To make matters worse, it was housework day. Still, having something to do was better than being left alone with her thoughts. She’d never let her mother know that. Groaning, she rolled over and closed her eyes. It wasn’t worth getting out of bed yet.

  When she woke up the second time, hours had passed. Cassie still felt like crap. She shivered as she rose from bed and headed to the shower. It was going to take a lot for her to enjoy this day. Getting dressed, she heard the doorbell, followed by voices. Company? On a Saturday? Great.

  Maybe she could slip out to the mall, meet up with the girls. Shopping for something nice and pretty might make her feel better. After the funeral, she'd holed up in her room for the evening, hoping Todd would visit, only he hadn’t shown up and Cassie had gone to bed tired and teary.

  Now for a new day. Cassie headed down to the kitchen and put a couple of pieces of bread in the toaster. She’d missed too many meals this last week. Her appetite had been nonexistent. She had lived on the comfort of coffee instead.

  She stared at the empty coffeepot and sighed. They’d drunk it all. Served her right for getting up so late.

  "Cassie, we’re in the living room. Would you join us, please?"

  Cassie stared at the ceiling. "Just a minute." As her toast finished, she fixed a plate, poured a glass of orange juice and walked into the living room. A strange woman sat with her parents.

  "Ah, there you are. Cassie, please meet Dr. Sanchez."

  Cassie smiled at her. "Hello." She took a bite of her toast.

  "Please sit down with us, Cassie."

  Cassie raised an eyebrow and sat in the armchair in front of her. She took a drink of her orange juice and another bite of toast, waiting for someone to explain what was going on. The toast was amazingly tasty today. Her poor stomach was probably thrilled at having solid food, for a change.

  "Cassie…" her mother started, only to stop as if uncertain as to what to say.

  Now what? Cassie sat quietly, waiting, watching as all the adults exchanged wary glances. She really wanted to sigh heavily, her trademark I’m-hard-done-by mannerism cultivated over the years, but the toast occupied her attention just fine. She took another big bite and chewed happily.

  "You seem to be enjoying that piece of toast. Hungry?"

  Cassie stopped chewing mid-bite and studied the stranger. "Yes."

  The doctor smiled and nodded. "A healthy appetite is a good sign."

  The toast didn’t look quite so appetizing. "A good sign of what?" Cassie tilted her head. Come to think of it, this woman didn’t look like any of her mother's friends. She wore a sturdy navy blue suit jacket and skirt and a pale blue shirt with matching navy pumps. Cassie would never get caught dead dressed like that. Too professional. Too buttoned down. Too official. The toast in her stomach started to turn somersaults. A shrink.

  "It’s a good sign that you’re on the recovery from a deep shock."

  Cassie very carefully put the piece of toast down on her plate. "So much for my appetite."

  "Now Cassie," started Abby, leaning forward.

  Cassie’s father put a restraining arm on her mother’s shoulder. "Cassie, you are going to see Dr. Sanchez for a while."

  Abby turned slightly, frowning at him. "Tom, we aren’t forcing her into this."

  "The hell we aren’t," muttered Tom, glaring at the three females glaring back at him. "What? It needed to be said. You will all talk forever and get nowhere?"

  Abby smiled gently. "But where we get to in the end is easier on all of us."

  "Hmmph." He turned his glare to the window and ignored them.

  Cassie’s toast took on a nasty appearance. She put the plate down on the coffee table before turning to face the adults. Why did they always have to blindside her like this? It made her so mad. Couldn’t they just talk to her? "And why would I be seeing Dr. Sanchez?"

  Abby took a deep breath. "Honey, you’re struggling with Todd’s death. Dr. Sanchez can help you deal with the loss."

  Cassie shook her head. "If I didn’t want to speak with the grief counselors at the school why would I want to speak to Dr. Sanchez?" She glanced over at the doctor, who watched the interchange quietly. "No offense, doctor."

  Dr. Sanchez smiled, warmth and understanding softening the professional look on her face. "None taken, Cassie."

  "Mom, I could have used her assistance when Grams died. I don’t need it now."

  Abby tilted her head to stare at her daughter. "You had a hard time when Grams passed? Why? She was old. She’d had a good life. It was her time to die."

  Cassie stared at her mom. "You just don’t get it, do you? Why do you think I don’t ever talk to you? It’s like dialing a phone number but reaching a stove instead."

  Her mom’s mouth opened and closed several times. She blinked, turned to look at her husband before they both turned to stare at Cassie. Cassie rolled her eyes.

  With a small smile, Dr. Sanchez interrupted. "I think she means you’re talking a different language."

  Abby glanced between the doctor and Cassie, a question in her eyes.

  "Ya think?" Cassie could hardly keep her sarcasm in control. "What do any those factors about Grams have to do with how I felt about her death? Grams was everything to me. I loved her so much. Her death crippled me. And you…you didn’t even seem to care."

  "What?" Abby shoved her hand to her mouth. "How can you say that? She was my mother."

  "So, you’re mine."

  Rude; yes. Brutal; maybe. Still it felt good to finally let her mother know how she felt. Grams’ death had hurt, but her parents’ lack of reaction had been a betrayal at the deepest level.

  Abby pulled her lips in as if she’d sucked on a lemon.

  Her father stepped in. "That wasn’t necessary, Cassie. You apologize to your mother, right now."

  Cassie muttered, "Sorry." Then she glared at the three adults in the room. "Of course, you know what’s best for me, don’t you? Don’t bother asking me what I need. Typical."

  She stood up, picked up her plate and stormed back to the kitchen.

  Her father yelled, "Cassie, get back here. This matter isn’t resolved."

  "What’s to resolve? You’ve got something you’re going to force me to do, because you’re the all-knowing adults, and I’m the stupid teen who has no choices." She snorted. "I have to do this or I’ll get grounded for the rest of my life and won’t be able to see my friends and any other horrible things you try to dream up in your all-knowing wisdom. Or I move out. Something I can’t do yet." She turned and glared at the adults. "But I don’t want to do this. So congratulations on not getting my cooperation. Oh, and I will not see her here. There’s no way I’ll speak to her while there’s any chance of you two listening in." She couldn’t hold back the bitterness streaming through her voice.

  She spun on her heels and headed into the kitchen, her appetite long gone.

  In the background she heard her mother sobbing quietly and her father blustering abo
ut that girl.

  Cassie returned to her bedroom, grabbed her phone and purse then slipped out the back door.

  Like hell she was going to do housework now.

  ***

  Todd sat in the living room Cassie had stormed out of, wondering why adults never gave teenagers any credit. He wished he could materialize in front of them and tell them how special Cassie is and what a good kid she was. They would probably have a heart attack and lose consciousness before he could get the words out. Still, someone needed to give them the what for.

  "I don’t understand what’s happened to her. She used to be so easy going and loving. Now it’s like she all anger and angst." Abby sniffled into her sleeve.

  "You’ve been too easy on her. We should have killed the relationship with Todd years ago. Well before they became ‘best friends.’" He glared at the doctor. "Whatever that term means these days."

  The doctor’s calm never shifted. Her voice deepened slightly, a soothing tone entering. "Cassie sounds like a normal teenager. She’s lost someone important and she’s angry about it. On top of that, she doesn’t feel there’s anyone left who understands her."

  "But I do. That’s the thing. She won’t talk to me. We used to be so close. She turned away from me after my mother passed away. It was a doubly hard time for me, as I lost my mother and daughter at the same time."

  "That was a difficult time for everyone. For you and for her, since she was apparently very close to her grandmother. You can’t blame yourself. At the same time, if you didn’t show any sign of loss, she’d feel betrayed by your lack of emotion. As if you hadn’t cared for her grandmother and she had. That betrayal would fester and almost become anger…at its worst, it almost becomes hatred."

  Whew! A doctor who actually understood. This was amazing. Todd settled back to get a lesson in family psychology. Something else he wished he’d taken the time to understand better when he’d had the chance.

  Cassie’s father stomped to his feet and paced around the small room. "Almost – nothing! She did hate us. Still does, I’d say. At the time, she treated Abby like a pariah. It took a long time for Cassie to be civil again."

  The doctor smiled as if Cassie’s father said something incredibly intelligent. "That’s classic textbook. Cassie’s had a tough time. With the loss of her grandmother, she was forced to cope. Those same skills are helping her right now. This isn’t an easy time, but she’s doing the best she can. Her friend has only been gone a week, and the funeral was just yesterday. She’s processing the events and the impact this is going to have on her life."

  "What about her belief that she saw him even though he'd already died? Or the fact that she talks to him, even though he’s dead?"

  Todd leaned forward. Ooops. He’d gotten Cassie in trouble again. That he hadn’t intended to, didn’t matter. Although, Dr. Sanchez surprised him. She seemed to understand. Maybe he could talk to Cassie, explain what the doctor had said. Dr. Sanchez might be able to help Cassie. Maybe even bring her closer to her mother.

  He tuned in again to the conversation going on around him.

  "That’s normal. It’s her way of coping as she accepts her new reality. As long as she’s not suicidal, she needs to be given as much time and space as she needs." The doctor started to stand when Tom interrupted her.

  "What about her obsession with finding out what happened to her friend? She doesn’t believe the police take on this. She’s been asking questions, going to the sheriff’s office and who knows what else?"

  "Denial is also normal." Dr. Sanchez settled deeper into her chair. "If she believes she knows her friend better than the rest of you, and her knowledge doesn’t fit with the image of what everyone else is saying, she has to find an explanation in order to move forward."

  Abby reached a hand out to Tom. "How do we handle this?"

  Todd leaned forward. This was the test of Dr. Sanchez. If she got this right, then Todd would recommend Cassie go and see her for sure.

  "Give her time." Dr. Sanchez smiled at the two blank faces. "Quit thinking of her as damaged or ill. She’s fine. Yes, she could use my help, but more to speed up the process than anything. For what she’s been through, she’s doing amazingly well. What you don’t want to do is alienate her any further. If you want a relationship with her again, you’ll need to make sure there’s a pathway that she’s going to be willing to travel. Ease up on the discipline, the yelling at her. Don’t stare at her all the time to see how she’s doing. Be natural."

  Cassie’s father frowned, his gaze flitting between the doctor and his wife. Abby chewed her bottom lip and stared at the floor.

  Todd grinned, his hands going from his chin to knees several times in excitement. She was good.

  Perfect.

  CHAPTER TEN

  Cassie wandered aimlessly through the mall. She hadn’t bothered to contact her friends. She didn’t want to be with anyone except Todd. The only person in the whole world who’d understood her before and might understand what she was going through now was gone.

  She couldn’t even call him. Unless there was a dial-hell-on-earth number somewhere.

  Her mind touched briefly on this morning’s disaster before ruthlessly slamming that door shut. She so wasn’t going there.

  Cassie stopped at the window of a specialty bathing suit shop and stared at the bikini on a plastic mannequin. Beach season was in a month or so. A couple of weeks ago, she’d wondered if she’d be too chubby for a bikini, and this week she wondered if she’d lost so much weight that the bra might cave inward for a lack of anything to keep it out. How sad was that? She’d been so proud when she’d finally started developing, years after Penny. And now she resembled a scrawny twelve-year-old again. Did people lose ten pounds in a week?

  Maybe that’s what had her mom worried.

  Cassie surveyed her reflection and had to admit, her hair, although clean, hung limp to her shoulders. She should have put it up in a ponytail. Her eyes had the same black circles under them as yesterday. Yeah, that might give her mother cause for concern.

  Groaning, Cassie rubbed her cheeks until they flushed pink. She really did have a scarecrow thing going on. The food court was only a couple of corners away. She needed food, since she hadn't finished her toast this morning. A muffin would go down nicely right now.

  A few minutes later she found an empty table and took a small bite. Blueberry. Yum. She took a second taste of muffin, relishing that same explosion of flavor she’d experienced with her toast this morning.

  "Well, well, well. Look who’s here."

  Three of Todd’s druggy friends pulled up chairs and sat beside her. One pulled her plate away and the other snagged her coffee cup.

  "Hey," she protested, snatching the muffin off the plate. "What are you doing?"

  "Well, little Miss Snoopy here hasn’t been listening. So we’re paying you a second visit." Brodie sneered, his eyes dead cold.

  Brodie terrified the crap out of her. He had a way of looking at her as if she were nothing. As if he’d just as soon step on her, like a bug. She’d asked Todd about him once. His explanation had more to do with having known each other since they were small children than anything to do with liking the guy. More like a routine that had developed into a bad habit over time. Only Todd wasn’t here now to rein him in.

  "Yeah, siccing the police on us wasn’t very smart of you." Aric took a sip of her coffee while she watched. His face punched up like her neighbor’s pug.

  She laughed. "Not man enough to drink the real stuff, huh?"

  The cup landed on the table with enough effort to splat coffee all over everything. She glared at them all. "What is your problem?"

  Goth Dory snickered, her black makeup rippled like a clown. She leaned forward in a parody of meanness that came off as pathetic instead. "Don’t you be going and telling the cops about us. They came to my door yesterday asking all kinds of questions."

  "Then answer the stupid questions. The cops don’t need to be told about you three
. Crap, you’re on the top of the teenage wanted list as far as they’re concerned. You’ll all be doing adult time before the year is out. I never did see what Todd saw in you guys. Drunk driving, theft, drugs." She sneered at them. "Maybe one of you left Todd to die on the side of that hill, while you ran off to save your lousy hides. Vehicular manslaughter, if you had anything to do with it. Great addition to your rap sheet. Kill your best friend and leave him to die alone." Cassie snorted, pissed as hell and grateful to have a direction to blow. She didn’t know if there would be any charges for something like that, she sure as hell wished there would be.