by Grace White
He smiled and warmth flooded me. How could I ever tell this man no? “Yes,” I whispered. “I’ll come with you.”
~
“You went to see her?” Marcus asked me as we walked hand-in-hand to the sea where he worked. It was quiet, closed for the evening, but he’d gotten access by asking the security guy for a favor.
He helped me down and lifted my legs over his, slipping off my Uni issue pumps. His hands smoothed over my bare feet and I let out a soft groan. It felt so good. But then he swung my legs over the edge and my toes hit the cold water. I shrieked and he laughed. It was a sound I would never tire of hearing, a stark contrast to the brooding man that walked into the Spa all those days ago.
“Yes, she knows things, Marcus. About us.”
“I know.” He pulled off his own shoes and shuffled to the edge, his legs brushing mine as they lowered into the water.
My eyes snapped to his, but he was staring out across the water. “Marcus?”
“She helped me find the flower. The Lapisalia. I’ve known her since we got here. There isn’t much in this place that woman doesn’t know about.”
“Did she…did she say anything else to you?”
“Like what?”
So, she hadn’t told him.
“Nothing.” I turned away, leaning down to glide my hand in the water. I swished it out, forcing the liquid with the curve of my fingers. Marcus sucked in a small breath and I smiled. Reining in my power, ending the connection, the water crashed to the pool beneath it.
“You really are something else,” he said, a hint of awe in his voice. Silence descended around us as we watched the water. It wasn’t anything like the vast Seas of Sequoia, but being here, with Marcus, made my chest swell and a sense of peace settled over me. Like maybe Madam Dubraire was right…like maybe this was exactly where I was supposed to be.
“Alora,” Marcus said. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
“Okay.” I shifted, angling my body to his, but he still didn’t make eye contact. Whatever was coming, wasn’t good, and panic flooded my chest.
“This isn’t easy for me. I don’t…”
“Marcus, look at me.” I reached for his jaw, coaxing him to me. “Whatever it is, I’m here. I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”
His eyes shuttered and he drew a long breath into his chest. When he opened them again, I saw something that startled me. But I ignored it, letting him continue.
“When I returned to Wreston after the war, I was changed. I did things…things that I’m not proud of. I became someone I barely recognized. I hurt my family. I hurt someone…” His voice cracked and my hand reached for his.
“What happened, Marcus?”
“I was working a job.” He raked a shaky hand over his head. “It was a heist. A drug dealer wanted payback on a competitor. We were supposed to get in, steal the gear, and get out. Only we ran into a complication…”
My insides twisted. I couldn’t imagine him as that person. He was brooding yes, and sometimes downright mean, but Marcus had a good heart. I felt it in his touch. The way he kissed me.
“There was a child, she got in the way. My partner fired a warning shot, but he missed.”
Oh, to the gods.
“He killed her,” my voice quivered.
“Yes, and we ran. We didn’t even call for help.”
“Marcus…”
“Don’t. Don’t you dare feel sorry for me, I don’t deserve your pity or sympathy.” He looked out to the sea again, his hands balled into fists.
“Good, because I’m not offering it.” His eyes snapped back to mine and I squeezed his hand. “What you did…I have no words. But it is in the past and I’m assuming you’re in the Complex to atone for your sins?”
His eyes turned cold and I shuddered. “I’m here because the father of the girl I killed wants revenge. He’s holding my parents lives ransom until I get out of here and hand over the one-hundred thousand S-Co.”
“And then he’ll let you all go?”
Marcus’s mouth turned down at the corners and the air left my lungs as realization sank into my bones. “Oh.”
“The second those breech doors open and I return to Wreston to hand over the coin, I am a dead man, Alora. My life for my parents. That is my penance.” He shifted closer until his face was only a whisper away from mine. “So, you see, babe, I can offer you eighteen months. We can explore this thing between us, enjoy it while it lasts, but that’s it. There is no happy ending for us.”
I closed my eyes, dragging a deep breath into my lungs. A life without Marcus was too painful to even consider, and then something Madam Dubraire said flashed into my mind. My eyes flew open as the words rushed from my lips. “What if there was another way?”
Marcus
Another way?
What in the galaxies did she mean?
“Alora, this isn’t something your water tricks will fix.” It was supposed to be a light-hearted comment, but I saw her wince and felt like a total jackass.
“We are bound, Marcus.”
“Bound?”
“This thing you feel, that we feel, amongst my kind it has a name.”
“A name? What are you talking about?”
“It is the Esse.”
“The Esse?”
She nodded. “In your world, I think you would use the term soulmates.”
Soulmates? She thought we were soulmates?
“Listen, Alora, I like you and all, but I’m not sure I buy into all that stuff.”
The beautiful water goddess beside me shrugged, a shaky smile gracing her face. “It doesn’t matter what you believe. It is the truth. And it can save your life.”
“Whoa, there.” I pulled my feet out of the water and leapt up. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I told you my story to make you understand why this is all I can offer you. Right now, in the Complex.”
“Marcus, if you’d just let me explain—”
“I’m sorry.” I scrubbed a rough hand over my face, feeling the panic build. “I can’t do this. I’m not sure what you think we are to each other, Alora, but it’s not this.”
Her Esse? What in the ever-loving fuck was that anyway? It sounded like something alien. Something I wanted no part of.
“Marcus, please…” Alora was on her feet now, staring at me with those big blues. Pleading with me. But everything I knew to be true was screaming at me to get the hell out of here. I knew my future.
And it didn’t involve any soulmate bullshit.
~
Kyan found me hours later, hunched over a bottle of beer. “You look like shit. Rough day?”
“You could say that.”
He nodded for the bartender to bring him a beer and dropped onto the stool beside me. “Want to talk about it?”
I ran my thumb over the rim of the bottle, replaying Alora’s words over and over. It was all I’d done for the last few hours. Every time I tried to digest it all, it became even more implausible.
“Do you believe in soulmates?” The words felt like poison on my tongue.
“Soulmates,” Kyan said. “I’m not sure about that, but I’ve never seen anyone look at a woman the way my pa looks at my mom. They’ve been together since they were just kids. Almost thirty-five years. If that doesn’t make them soulmates, I don’t know what does.”
My eyes slid to his. He was watching me, a curious look on his face. “Good for them, but do you believe in soulmates?”
“What has gotten into you?” He took a long pull on his beer. “You have that look in your eyes. The one that says I should back up.”
“It’s her, Alora. She’s so far under my skin I can’t think straight.”
“Ahh, the water chick. She thinks you’re soulmates?” I scoffed and he laughed. “You’re shitting me?”
“Do I look like I’m shitting you?”
“Well, I didn’t see that coming. I thought you’d bang her, have a bit of fun, and move on with life.”
My fist clenched
and a low growl formed in my throat. Kyan’s eyes widened and he grumbled, “Oh shit, you’ve fallen for her too.”
“Shut up.”
“You have, haven’t you? Or has she worked some Undine alien mind-fuck on you.”
I lurched toward him but he reared back, a smirk painted on his face. “Ah ha.” He snapped his fingers. “I’m right.”
“I don’t know, okay?” I ran a brisk hand over my head, tugging the ends of my hair. What was happening to me? Everything had been on plan until she came along. Mind-numbingly boring, but on plan nonetheless. Now, I had to smother the seeds of hope taking root in my chest. The flashes of a life we could have together.
Together.
What did I know about being with someone, let alone an Undine princess? She’d said it was forbidden and now she what…wanted to save me?
“Listen.” Kyan laid his hand on my shoulder. “You overthink things. It’s like I said before, who knows what awaits us when we get out of here. Maybe everything will be exactly as it was, but maybe everything will be different. Either way, you have eighteen months to wait to find out. And I’ve seen the way you look at her, man, you aren’t going to last a second in here if you try to cut her out of your life.”
I couldn’t disagree. My resolve had already disintegrated twice where Alora was concerned. But soulmates? Could I accept that?
Did I have any alternative?
“Are you really going to punish yourself for things you can’t control? Whatever is waiting for you back in Wreston will still be waiting for if you give this thing with Alora a shot.”
Therein lay the problem. Devin would be waiting to send me to hell. There was no happy ending. This wasn’t some Meta-Human fairytale. And besides, if Devin didn’t get to me first, I had a pretty good feeling her father would have something to say about us, Esse or no Esse. The odds were stacked so high against us and yet…I couldn’t imagine giving her up and walking away. Something deep inside of me resisted the idea.
“Shit, I’ve got to go.” I slammed my bottle down and Kyan jerked with laughter.
“Yeah, yeah you do. You can thank me later, the favors are really starting to stack up, Denegred” he called after me, but I was already out of the door.
~
“Alora.” I banged again not caring who heard me this time. “Alora, are you in there?”
“Don’t you think if she was in there, she would have opened the door by now?”
I turned to find her sister, Allegra, glowering at me. “You shouldn’t be here.”
“Do you know where she is?”
“Do you think I’d tell you if I knew?” Her eyebrows arched in challenge, and anger coursed through my veins. I stepped closer to her.
“You won’t keep me from her.”
“And what exactly do you think it is you’ll do to stop me.” She rose her hand and I half expected ice to shoot from her palm and pierce my skin, but a voice behind me said, “Stop. Just stop. Allegra, I need to talk with him.”
“Alora, I don’t think that’s a go—”
“I wasn’t asking for your permission.”
The sister growled and I couldn’t resist flashing her a smug smirk. She narrowed her eyes, glancing between Alora and me. “Father will—”
“I will tell Father everything once I have spoken to Marcus, alone. Now please, leave us be.”
“Fine.” Allegra returned to her room, slamming the door behind her.
“Come in.” Alora avoided making eye contact with me and it hurt something fierce. I followed her into the suite and stood clutching the back of my neck.
“I’m sorry,” I rasped out. “I shouldn’t have left like that.”
“No, you shouldn’t have.”
“It’s just, I’ve never done this and, well, the things you were saying, they got me all mixed up and I—”
“Marcus, stop,” her voice was eerily cold. “Why are you here? What do you want?”
I closed the distance between us, stopping only inches from her. “You, Alora, I want you.”
She turned her face from me, staring at nothing. My fingers traced her cheek and ran under her jaw, cupping her chin gently and forcing her back to me. “I’m just scared.”
“Scared?” Her voice was barely a whisper.
“I’ve never been in love before.” I admitted.
“You love me?”
“I think so. It seems impossible. But I feel it, I do. I don’t know if I believe it means more, but I can’t deny it either. I won’t.”
Her eyes fluttered shut and I sensed the relief seeping into her. When her lids opened, two blue pools stared back at me and I knew with certainty that I loved this woman regardless of what she was or who I was. None of it mattered. Kyan was right—again. When something as fucked up as the Complex handed you the chance to experience even a single moment of happiness, you took it.
“Marcus.” My name fell from her lips like a prayer. “There are still things we need to discuss, things we need to decide.”
That was okay. I was ready to talk. But first, I needed to make love to the woman that had given me hope.
Alora
“We should talk.” I pulled the sheet around my body as I sat up and smoothed my hair over one shoulder.
“Okay.” Marcus joined me, wrapping an arm around my shoulder and drawing me into his side.
When I’d found him hammering down my door, I hadn’t known what to expect. He seemed so resistant at the farm. So unwilling to hear me out. I knew it was a lot to process—I’d felt the same when Madam Dubraire tried to explain things to me—but if there was even a chance I could save him, I would do it.
Maybe that was my purpose here in the Complex, had been all along.
“The Esse,” I started. His body tensed beside me but I continued. “It is sacred amongst my species. A gift of the highest order. Undines will often take a mate, sometimes more than one in their infinite lives, but it is never out of love. We are not like Humans, Marcus, we do not have a soul. We can feel the things you do: lust, infatuation, desire, but we are never motivated by pure intentions. By love.”
Marcus turned into me and pressed a kiss to my shoulder. “Go on,” he urged.
“To find your Esse is to find your true mate—the one you are supposed to be with. Esse bonds became so rare that over time the story became more myth than fact. I’d forgotten all about it until my sister, Allendra, mentioned it the other week.”
“And you think I’m your Esse?” He sounded a lot calmer this time and I felt relieved.
“Yes. I knew what I felt for you wasn’t normal, but I thought that was because you were Human. Madam Dubraire confirmed it is in fact the Esse bond.”
“She never said a word to me.”
“She didn’t want to scare you, I imagine. The Esse is an eternal bond, Marcus. Even if the couple are separated, for whatever reason, they will not be able to move past the bond. It tethers them. Forever. They would mourn the other for an eternity.”
I gave him some time to digest my words. His arm stayed firmly around my shoulder but he remained quiet.
“My father has to accept the bond. It is sacred. To shun it would be sacrilege.”
This got his attention. He shifted around slightly to meet my eyes. “He has to accept us? Me? Even though I’m Human.”
I nodded. “There’s more. I think we can use our bond to protect you…from Devin.”
“Alora.” His arm pulled away and he grasped my hands in his. “I would never ask that of you.”
“No, but I would ask it of you. Let me do this for you, for my Esse. I just found you, Marcus. Eighteen months isn’t enough time.” I stared him straight in the eyes. “No amount of time will ever be enough with you.”
“Alora.”
“I thought my choice was duty or desire, head or heart, but it’s so much simpler than that. I choose you Marcus. I will always choose you. Now I’m asking you to choose me.”
He opened his mouth to speak, but I
pressed my finger to his lips. I had to get this out—all of it. He needed to know exactly what was at stake here.
“I am prepared to tell my father that I will relinquish my immortality…for you. For my Esse.” Marcus stiffened, the color draining from his face. “He’ll have no choice but to let me leave. We can live a Human existence on Wreston. Maybe we can barter with Devin. Or—”
“Alora, stop.”
“But I…” His mouth crashed down on mine, hard and primal. I melted against him, complying when he dragged me on top of him. We both moaned as his thick length pressed between my legs. “We still need to talk,” I murmured into his mouth.
“We have time.” He guided himself inside of me and my head fell back.
He was right, talking could wait.
~
“Marcus?”
“Yeah.” His fingers danced along my arm, drawing random patterns. He’d made love to me twice. Or in his own words, fucked me the first time and then made love to me the second. Semantics didn’t matter when the ending was the same. Our bodies were slick with sweat, but we didn’t move. I think we both felt that if we ended this moment, we might never get it back.
Something had changed in Marcus when I’d laid it all out for him. Well, almost all of it. There was still one thing I needed to put to him.
“Have you ever wondered what it’s like?” I asked.
“What what’s like?”
“Immortality.”
“Guess I’ve never really thought about it.”
I pushed up onto my elbows, glancing up at him. “Okay, imagine this, right here, forever. Waking up like this, falling to sleep like this, spending our days wrapped up in one another.”
His sleepy eyes widened a fraction. “Sounds pretty damn near perfect if you ask me.” His hand reached over and squeezed my ass. I shrieked, batting him away.
“Stop, I’m being serious,” I said. Marcus stilled, but I continued. “If there was a way to make it happen, would you want it?”
“Now, come on, Alora, that’s a pretty big fucking question to ask me. How in the galaxies can I even answer that?”
“Okay.” I sat up fully. “Maybe I should rephrase it.”