by Ace Gray
I nodded, smiling as wide as I could when I looked over his plump lips, red from our exploits.
“Congratulations, Laura,” Nick added without taking his eyes from mine.
Seamlessly he slipped past then nodded at Jaime. Terrence and Colton fell into step and I blushed realizing they must have seen the exchange, too. I stayed fixed on Nick as he strode into the elevator. His smoldering look right before the doors sealed sent a feverish blush across my skin.
“What did he mean, congratulations?” I turned and arched an eyebrow at Laura.
“Why did he ask if you’d be okay?” she questioned right back.
I shook my head and scoffed. “Over lunch?”
“Yup.”
Laura’s fine, silky pants swished all the way to the black town car idling at the curb. I raised my eyebrows, thoroughly intrigued at this point. Fancy luncheons and car service weren’t Laura’s daily fare.
“What’s going on here?”
“I’m buying lunch.” Laura shot me a sly smirk.
We didn’t drive far through the city before pulling into a car line. The din outside was louder—frantic, even. I hunkered back into my seat and worried on my lip. My pulse quickened when I glimpsed cameras hanging from this neck or cradled in that palm.
When the door opened, Laura jumped out while I desperately tried to slow my heartbeats. I twisted on the seat, tentatively planting each stiletto onto the curb and smoothing my skirt before standing up.
The second my chin tilted, the shimmer of light blinded me and I froze. The flashbulbs made my heart jackhammer and fingertips go numb.
This time Jaime was my savior. He protectively put one hand on my back and pushed the other out, forcing a path to the front door. His momentum propelled my wobbly legs straight into the restaurant. As soon as the doors suctioned back together, shutting out the cacophony of noise, I could breathe again. Barely.
“Ms. Elliott, Ms. Gold, we have your table ready.”
I smiled but it was the weird half-smile I’d developed.
I collapsed into a chair and reached for water, hoping to settle my nerves. I prayed Laura didn’t notice the way ice danced in my glass as my trembling hand pressed the rim to my lips.
“Are you okay?”
She noticed.
“This shit…” I waved toward the front door. “…is getting to me.”
“Language.” Her face fell.
“I’ve never been claustrophobic but being confined by that…” I blew out a deep breath.
“Should you see someone?”
“Fuck, Laura.” I glowered across the table like she’d slapped me. “And don’t even say language.” My voice turned icy without any real forethought.
After my parents’ death, she’d learned just how averse to talking about my problems I really was. Bringing it up now was a low blow.
“I’m concerned. I’m allowed to be concerned.” She planted her hands on the table and leaned toward me.
I sighed and looked away, aimlessly letting my eyes wander across the room.
“I’m fine when I’m with Nicholas. He grounds me.”
She sat back in her chair, shaking her head as she went. I couldn’t tell if she disapproved of Nick or just how badly I’d fallen for him.
“Can we drop it? I have zero desire to discuss this further.” I sighed loudly. “Change of subject. Why did Nicholas congratulate you back at the office?”
“Yeah. That was creepy by the way. How did he know we were going to celebrate?” She ordered a bottle of high-end champagne with a wave of her fingers then cocked her head at me.
“He has a tendency to be in everybody’s business.”
“Even mine? I don’t approve.”
“After Ally tried to get into the apartment I made sure he was looking out for you,” I said sharply.
“Sorry.” She sensed my mood shifting and redirected swiftly. “I got a new job.”
“I figured.” I arched my eyebrow. “The suit, the car service… What is it? Or am I going to have to play twenty fucking questions?”
She wasn’t deterred by my pissiness.
“You’re looking at the newest Senior Contributing Editor at S&C.” She slapped her hands onto the table as the bubbles arrived.
“As in the magazine?” My eyebrows shot up.
I was surprised she’d left book publishing. Floored actually. It wasn’t just a passion, but also a hobby. Random and often passive aggressive margin notes covered most of the books I had shelved in my apartment. I was also slightly worried about the sheer number of well-dressed, successful men she would come into contact with. She wasn’t really on a monogamy train as of late. I said as much.
“You’re a jerk. This is the most exciting thing that’s happened to me in years. It is the most exciting thing to happen to me professionally, and you think I’m going to sleep around?”
“Well.” I shrugged. “Lately…”
“I’m just having a little fun. As someone who’s had a ton of fun in her day, you shouldn’t be so judgey.” She narrowed her gaze at me. “Besides, I’d never mix business with pleasure.”
“Fine. Sorry I said anything.” I put up my hands in surrender. “I’m a shitty friend.”
“Watch your language.” She rolled her eyes at me. “And self-deprecating doesn’t suit you.” She snatched her glass and slugged it back quickly.
“Well, I am…” I sighed. “…a shitty friend. I mean, I didn’t even know you were looking for a new job.”
“You’ve been busy.” She looked away, crossing her arms with a humph.
“I’ve been busy before and I made it work then.” I cocked my head and waited for her to turn toward me. “I’m sorry.” I put all my sincerity into the apology, and she melted a little. I smiled and added, “Does this mean you’re going to start paying rent?”
“Nope.” She popped her lips and took a sip of champagne. “You make enough to own the magazine. I think you’ll manage the mortgage all on your own.”
I winked and we clinked glasses. She continued talking about the job and her role in the organization. It was rare for S&C to hire a female editor, but the powers that be felt strongly about adding a different opinion, if only to play devil’s advocate. I was excited for her, and looked forward to reading her articles again. I’d missed them after college.
“With compliments of Victor Alexander.” A server appeared and started to pour Dom Pérignon before I could decline.
“Fuck. I forgot about him,” I mumbled under my breath.
“For the love of God, Kate, watch your language. Hard times or no, you weren’t raised in a trailer park.” I glared at her and she met my gaze, unflinching. “Wanna tell me what this is all about?”
Guess we’re going to get into it after all.
I pushed the glasses and bottle away as I recounted the details Bryant had given me. I automatically scanned for Jaime as I spoke only to find him having an animated conversation on the phone right outside the window. My face fell further.
“Are you kidding me?” she shrieked. “How does he know you’re here? Do you have another stalker?” Her eyes were about ready to bug out of her head.
“I don’t know how he knows. How do the paparazzi always know? It’s not as if I’m inconspicuous as of late.” I rolled my eyes.
“Oh man, it is not your year, my friend. Are you sure Bryant isn’t to blame for this?”
“You’re going to ask that again?” Ice tinged my words.
“Kate, I’m not being confrontational. I’m worried.” Her tone sweetened.
“Having Nick is amazing. It’s not always perfect, some days far from it. But the good far outweighs the bad. I don’t blame him for anything but being a pompous ass. But he’s my pompous ass, and I love him.” My fists balled and jaw clenched, my eyes unwavering.
I searched for Jaime again. He was back at his post casually shifting his gaze between the entrance and the two of us. Laura sat sipping, letting her eyes flit across the room. Everyone, including those two, looked at ease. Meanwhile my insides couldn’t settle.
Maybe there is something wrong with me.
Lunch was normal after that. Later, work was exhausting, but normal, too. And normal never sat exceedingly well on my shoulders.
When I finally wrapped at the office near ten p.m., I was dying to be in bed. My own bed. I called to tell Nick as much. The phone rang and rang.
“Jaime, do you know where Nicholas is?” I called to him in the lobby over Nick’s clipped voicemail greeting.
“At home, Kate.”
I hung up and redialed. Still no answer. I tried the house phone. When it rang endlessly, it struck me deeply. There was something extra taxing about Nick’s silence. It put me on edge.
Once at my apartment, I changed into yoga pants and a giant sweatshirt with every intention of sipping cognac on the couch until brusque voices reached my ears. Nick’s name instantly piqued my curiosity, and I was all but forced to tiptoe down the hall to eavesdrop.
“Who is she?” Colton sneered defensively. I could picture his arms crossed on his chest.
“You don’t need to know who she is, just that she’s involved with Christopher. Mr. Bryant’s stepbrother is…unstable. Needless to say, we’re concerned,” Jaime answered.
What the…?
“Mr. Bryant seems particularly concerned that it’s her.”
“He’s not,” Jaime’s bark was forceful, particularly for him. “Or at least he better not be.” His voice tapered to an uneasy silence.
“He hasn’t asked about Kate. He hasn’t called once.” Colton’s concern slithered up and squeezed on my throat.
“He’s gotten updates. He always does.” Jaime shot him down quickly, but lacked conviction.
“What’s going on?” I asked, rounding the corner—I couldn’t help myself.
“What do you mean, Kate?” Jaime asked, angling for innocent. He wasn’t adept at playing dumb, and Colton was downright terrible. He shrunk and tried to skulk out of the room.
“Jaime.” I sighed loudly. “Don’t play games with me. I get jerked around plenty as it is. Where is he? What’s going on?”
“Remember not too long ago when we had a conversation about my employer? And how you aren’t him?”
I did. And I could read between the lines. Jaime wouldn’t be sharing. Or couldn’t. My temper bubbled up in my throat. I wanted to rail on, but this wasn’t a fight to have with Jaime. I couldn’t blame him. I couldn’t even shout at him. But Nick…I dialed his number again.
Nothing.
Full of foreboding I lugged myself back upstairs, bringing the cognac along. I lay back in bed and stared up at the ceiling wishing there were dots to count to distract myself from whatever was brewing.
I rolled over, shoving my face into the fluffy down of my pillow and let out a frustrated scream. When that didn’t soothe me I took the pillow and chucked it across the room with another snarl. I flopped back onto the bed and tried to empty my brain.
Truthfully, I was miserable at being alone with my thoughts, but eventually the cognac took over and knocked me out. When sharp sounds echoed through my apartment and woke me, I was tangled, almost bound, in bedding. I kicked at the sheets as I pushed up, surprised by the muffled shouting ringing up my stairwell.
“You’re playing with fire.” The first voice wasn’t immediately familiar but it was undeniably protective.
“Any time Christopher’s involved we’re playing with fire.” That voice I knew. It was my own personal siren song.
“Nicholas, I am not referring to Christopher.”
“I’m not discussing her. We were barely together then, and definitely aren’t now. But that doesn’t mean I won’t protect her.”
Before I knew it I was walking toward my door, sure I was listening to the continuation of Jaime and Colton’s conversation from earlier. I opened it slowly and crept to the landing to continue eavesdropping.
“Let me handle it,” Jaime’s voice broke into a desperate plea.
What the hell?
“No,” Nick spat back.
I plowed down the stairs, and as soon as I found Nick, my eyes flew to his deeply gray gaze.
“What’s with all the yelling?”
“Sweets.” Nick pushed past Jaime and reached for me. “Did we wake you?”
“No, I’m always up at this ungodly hour.” I shoved my hands onto my hips. He chuckled and leaned in to kiss my forehead. I arched away. “What’s this all about? What’s going on?”
“Nothing.” Nick’s tone shifted again.
He’s brushing me off.
Jaime shook his head and strode down the hall.
“It’s not nothing. You aren’t answering my calls, you’re screaming at Jaime, and everyone is worked up over something. Is this about Christopher?”
His whole face darkened as he pulled me up to my bedroom.
“We don’t discuss Christopher.”
He dropped my hand to close the door then peeled off his shirt, pausing to look unflinching into my eyes.
“Maybe we should start.” I arched my eyebrows trying not to get lost in his tumultuous gaze or his tanned, toned chest.
“Jesus, Kate, leave it alone. I’m dealing with business that doesn’t concern you. Do you not believe me when I say that?” He flipped the covers back and dropped his pants.
“God damnit, Nick.” I stomped my foot as he slid into bed and spun in the sheets, leaving me to look at his broad back. “Of course I believe you. I just hate being kept in the dark.”
I flopped down to the mattress and the pillows puffed beneath me. I let out a deep breath and studied the hash marks in the warehouse-style windows above my bed to help hold my tongue. They weren’t as large as Nick’s but they were chic and divided into a hash marked grid that my eyes could trace on repeat.
Were we going to have the same fight forever? If we were—over and over—was forever even an option? The hash marks had absolutely no answers for me.
“Give me something for fuck’s sake.” I punched the bed on either side of my hips, tempted to throw a full-blown tantrum.
Nick breathed out a heavy sigh and rolled onto his back, mirroring me. We both stared up at the ceiling, keeping a small distance between us. He took deep breaths, sighing here and there. Just when the tension became too much to bear, he spoke.
“There’s this undeniable trail of pain in my wake. Just when I think I’m past it, it pops back up.”
“What?” I turned to study him. His brow was furrowed, his lips turned down, and his eyes were that color. “Nick, that isn’t true. I’m pissed, but not hurt, and you’ve seen to that. Please believe me when I say you’re amazing.” I wrapped my arms around him. “I love you.”
“I don’t know why.”
Yes, something was up. Yes, he was keeping it from me. But broken Nick caused me real physical pain. I could table this discussion until morning.
“Nicholas Bryant.” I sighed, exasperated, then nuzzled into him. “Let me show you.” I slid my leg over to straddle his thighs before letting my lips move down his torso.
He let me kiss down to his waistband. I pulled the fabric away with my teeth. The point of my tongue tickled at his shaft. He twitched in response. I changed directions, and my bottom teeth scraped up along his skin as I headed back up for his nipple. My lips closed gently on his pec as I sucked. Hard.
When I lifted slightly to switch nipples, Nick took advantage, pressing me up and guiding me onto his erection. I threw my head back but didn’t make a sound, instead relishing him
inside me and the rapture crawling across my skin.
The world went a little hazy as my hips rolled. Nick pawed at me, fondling anywhere he could reach. When I eventually orgasmed, my vision tunneled, and my muscles seized. I collapsed onto Nick as my world went dark.
“You stupid whore.” Ally’s cry pierced the air. “You ruined everything. Absolutely everything!”
The phantom voice screeched through my nightmare and I shot upright so forcefully I even broke through Nick’s grasp. I yelped into the dark room but it was my hammering heart and ragged panting that filled my ears.
“Sweets.”
Nick wrapped around me, trying to coax me back down to my pillow. I shrugged out of his hands, still lost in the nightmare. I fought harder as adrenaline coursed through my veins, but Nick cradled me closer.
“Kate,” he begged.
Tears rolled down my cheeks. I still wrestled against his arms but was losing steam.
“It’s okay, Sweets. You’re okay,” he was whispering into my hair, determined to hold me up against his chest. “I’ve got you.” His big strong hands roamed up and down my arms. “I’ve always got you.”
Finally, I collapsed into his lap, my tears pouring onto soft wool.
Wool?
Nick was fully dressed—three-piece suit, sleek shoes, and all. In between sniffles, I pushed back to arm’s length and looked him over. Despite being painfully gorgeous, painfully Nick, my heart broke a little.
“Why are you dressed?” My voice was shaky at best.
“I have to go.”
“Why?” My chest trembled. “It’s pitch black outside.” I looked at the clock. “It’s four. You’ve been here two hours.”
“Something’s come up.” He rubbed my arm gently.
“Something’s been up,” I sneered to hide my hurt. Nick looked away. Very few city lights filtered into my room, but I could tell his eyes were dark and his face was pinched. “Just go.” I turned over and burrowed into my pillow without waiting to hear his hollow words.
“Kate.” Nick was suddenly sharp. “I have to protect the things that matter to me.”