by Alexa Davis
"Hey, hey, hey, don't get your panties in a twist, babe," he said turning over to look at me. "I told you I would clean it up!"
"Tommy," I said quietly. "This isn't working."
"What are you talking about?" he said. "What's not working?"
"You and me, this," I said in a sad voice. "We're not working. Our marriage isn't working. Nothing is working."
"Emily, Emily, Emily," he said as he sensed the seriousness in my voice and raised himself up to look at me. "What do you mean, we're not working?"
"I mean," I said as I took a deep breath. "I don't want to be married to you anymore."
"What the hell?" he yelled. "What in the hell are you even talking about? Where did this come from?"
"I'm not happy, Tommy," I said. "I haven't been happy for a long time. And, I don't think you're happy, either, or you wouldn't drink so much."
"I'm happy as hell, what are you talking about?" he shouted as he pulled himself up out of bed and stood naked in the middle of the room looking for a pair of shorts. I spied them on the chair in the corner and pointed toward them.
"I'm not happy, Tommy," I repeated.
"So what are you saying?" he yelled as he pulled his shorts on. "Are you saying you're leaving me? Because if you're leaving me, that's really crappy, Em. Really small, you know."
"I know," I said nodding my head in agreement. "I know it feels crappy, but I want out, Tommy. I want my own life back. This life is your life, not mine. I don't want to live this life."
"Wait, so now you're telling me that when I had a shot at the majors you were willing to ride the train with me, but now that I'm out of play, you're done?" he said in a low angry tone. He was getting worked up and I could feel the anger building. He was hurt and felt like I was abandoning him, but I knew that I had to do this to save myself. I couldn't save him. I'd tried, but he had proven that he didn't want to be saved.
"It's not like that at all, and you know it, Tommy," I said gently scolding him. "You know I support you no matter what you do."
"You just don't want to be married to me anymore," he said in a very small voice.
"Correct," I nodded. "I want my own life back."
"And, I'm not part of that life," he said.
"No, you're not," I replied honestly. "Not anymore."
"But I was at one time, wasn't I?" he asked.
"At one time," I nodded. "Back when we were young and foolish and had dreams of something better."
"Well, will you at least stay and help me get this place cleaned up?" he begged. I knew he was looking for a way to extend our time together, and even though I knew I was on my way out, I felt like I owed it to him to help before I left.
"Yes, I'll stay and help clean the place up and then we can talk about how we are going to deal with this," I replied.
"Will you come sleep in the bed with me?" he asked as he lay down on his side of the bed and gestured to my side.
"I don't think that's a good idea, Tommy," I said. "I'll sleep in the guest room and in the morning, I'll make us breakfast and we can talk about how to clean this place up."
"Oh Em, please don't leave me!" Tommy cried suddenly. "I don't want you to leave me!"
I felt my heart cracking a little as I looked at him, nodded, and said, "I know you don't, but I have to."
I walked out the door and down the hallway where I opened the guest bedroom door and looked around. It wasn't the glamorous hotels I was used to sleeping in, but it would do until I could figure out a way to clean up the mess that my marriage had become.
Chapter Fifty-Eight
Austin
I stopped over in L.A. to meet up with Bax before heading to Vegas to visit the casino and check in with the managers who would be training the Paris crews. When I saw my friend in the lobby of the Marks Hotel on Rodeo Drive, I smiled and pounded him on the back just like we'd done when we were kids.
"Bax!" I called. "Good to see you, my friend."
"Hey, boss," he smiled as he looked up from a stack of papers he was reading. Bax had always been a serious person, even when we were kids. The neighborhood kids had called him "The Accountant" because he'd dressed in pants with creases down the front and buttoned up shirts, no matter what the season was. He wore thick-rimmed glasses and his smiles rarely reached his eyes, but I knew why Bax was so serious. I was the only one who'd seen what the inside of the home he'd shared with his father while we were growing up. Bax's mother had died in childbirth and his father was a hard working, hard drinking union laborer, but the place was like a mausoleum and we were warned not to touch anything. Once a week, Bax's dad had a cleaning woman come in and dust, vacuum, and do the laundry, but that was the extent of any kind of a woman's touch in the home.
I forgave Bax his shortcomings because he'd been my best friend since we were nine. He'd defended me against the neighborhood bully by telling him that I'd hooked up with the gang that ran the drug trade in front of our neighborhood bodega and the bully had never bothered me again. Bax was loyal and smart, and I loved him like a brother.
"So, what's up with Daniel and his henchmen?" I asked as I signaled the waiter to bring us a couple of glasses of whiskey and two cold beers.
"I'm trying to figure out what kind of game he's playing over in Eastern Europe," Bax said as he looked back and forth between two sheets of paper comparing numbers. "But I cannot, for the life of me, figure out what the heck he's doing!"
Daniel Wentworth had driven both of us crazy for years, but he hadn't actually gotten in the way of any projects until now. We knew that he was a slick, crafty businessman and that if he was opposing us, then there was something going on we didn't know about. Bax accepted the drink from the waiter and we toasted to our Parisian endeavor.
"I don't know, boss," Bax said. "I can't find anything on this Berlin deal that indicates that there's anything out of order there."
"Nothing at all?" I asked.
"Not a single paperclip," he sighed. "My gut tells me that there's so much more than meets the eye, but my eyes can't find the loose thread."
"Well, keep looking," I said as I sipped my whiskey and tried to think of another way to approach the problem. "Eventually, we'll figure it out, the truth always outs."
Just then, I looked up and saw a familiar shapely blonde crossing the lobby and walking toward me. I smiled as I held out my hand, "Anna! How have you been, beautiful?"
"Well, well, well, if it isn't Austin Marks and company!" she laughed as she gripped my hand and pulled me to her for a hug. "What are you doing here?"
"Business," I said, nodding toward Bax. "This is Jonathan Baxter, or as I call him, Bax. Bax, I'd like you to meet Anna Sommerhill."
"It's nice to meet you, Ms. Sommerhill," Bax said as he took her hand and shook it.
"Oh, please, call me Anna, won't you?" she stared at Bax like she'd never seen anything like him before. Admittedly, Bax was movie star handsome, but in a shy unassuming way. Women often fell head over heels for him, but he regularly failed to notice. He was a numbers guy to the core.
"Sure, Anna, it's still nice to meet you," Bax said in a serious tone.
"Aren't you adorable?" Anna said as she moved around and sat down next to him on the chaise lounge. "Where did you find him, Austin?"
"Austin and I have been best friends since we were nine, Ms...Anna," Bax replied. "He didn't find me anymore than I found him. We're just good friends."
She recoiled as if she'd been stung, but then leaned in closer and said, "Would you like to have dinner with me tonight, Mr. Baxter?"
"Why would I want to do that?" he asked.
"Because I think you are the most interesting man I've ever met and I would like to get to know you better," she said as she lightly rested her hand on his thigh. Suddenly, the lights in Bax's head went on and his eyes widened as he looked over at me. I smiled and nodded.
"Then, I'd love to have dinner with you, Anna," he said. "But please, call me Bax."
"Bax, eh?" she said smiling
as her hand moved a little higher. "That's kind of a sexy nickname you know."
He swallowed hard and looked to me for help, I shrugged, got up from the chair, and said, "Well, I've got some phone calls to make. You kids have a great time!"
"Austin?" Bax called after me. "Don't forget to call Benoit and find out what they decided!"
"Done!" I waved as I walked to the front door and hoped into the waiting car. I had someplace I knew I needed to be.
#
As the car whisked me to the airport to catch my flight, I pulled out my phone and texted Emily.
Austin_Marks: Hi
Em_Flies: Hi
Austin_Marks: What are U wearing?
Em_Flies: WTF?
Austin_Marks: JK. How are U?
Em_Flies: Good.
Austin_Marks: Just good?
Em_Flies: Fine. How are U?
Austin_Marks: Good. On way to Vegas. Have breakfast w/me tomorrow?
Em_Flies: Don't think that's a good idea.
Austin_Marks: Please?
Em_Flies: Where?
Austin_Marks: Pick U up at 7:30 am. Address?
Em_Flies: Not a good idea. I'll meet U. Address?
Austin_Marks: Marks Hotel on Las Vegas Blvd.
Em_Flies: CU in the morning.
Austin_Marks: CU then!
#
The next morning, I looked up from the newspaper and saw Emily crossing the lobby. She was dressed in a sundress the color of a clear summer sky and had her hair loose around her shoulders. She smiled at me as she walked toward me and when she reached me, I stood up and pulled her into a tight hug.
"I've missed you," she whispered into my chest as she wrapped her arms around my neck.
"Likewise," I said as I hugged her a little tighter.
She sat down next to me and we laughed as we both began to speak.
"No, you first," she said.
"No, no, go ahead," I laughed as I waved my arm in a traditional display of chivalry.
"I'm so glad you texted," she began.
The smile on her face grew wider as she spoke, and she told me about what she had been doing to try and get the house ready for sale. Tommy had agreed to a separation, but he wanted to stay in the house and work on it together before they put it up for sale. She'd agreed, thinking that it was the least she could do before she exited the marriage. Things had been fairly smooth for the past several weeks, but Tommy was still Tommy and so he went out sometimes and came home smelling of booze and sometimes other women. Emily consoled herself with the fact that she'd be out of the house by the end of the month and then could move on with her life.
"Are you alright?" I asked. I was concerned about her safety, but I knew it wasn't my place to take a stand on that issue.
"Oh yes, I'm fine," she said. "There's nothing to worry about, it's just the tough part of breaking up, you know?"
I nodded, but didn't say that I had no idea what she was talking about. I'd never broken up with anyone in my life. The girls I'd dated had all broken up with me when they realized that my focus was on school and then, later, the business. It never really bothered me because I didn't let myself get attached enough to feel hurt when they left. I just let go gracefully and moved on.
"So, did you clear the whole day for me?" I asked excited about what I'd planned for us to do.
"Wait, what?" she said confused. "I thought we were just having breakfast and catching up."
"No, I planned a whole day full of activities for us," I said as I smiled at her.
"Austin, I'm not sure this is a good idea," she said hesitantly. "I mean, you and me? Here in my hometown? Where my husband lives and works?"
"Where is he today?" I asked.
"He's at work, of course," she said. "But you're the boss and this is a little weird, don't you think?"
I could see that the stress of me being here in her actual life was getting to her, so I backed off and said, "It's fine, no worries. Let's just enjoy breakfast and then we'll see what we want to do after that, okay?"
She nodded and I saw the tension recede a little. I had ordered the chef's special for us both and Emily laughed with delight as plate after plate began to be delivered to the table.
"Oh my gosh, I'm so stuffed!" she cried as she took one last bite of the eggs in front of her before the server removed them and set a plate of steaming hot crepes down in its place. I watched as she savored each of the dishes and then offered her bites of my own. She gladly accepted the offerings, and she smiled when I reached out under the table and rested my hand on her thigh.
"You like it all?" I asked.
"I love it! You're a great foodie, Austin," she smiled as she tucked a piece of ripe melon between her lips. The juice ran down her chin and I reached out with my napkin to blot it. She was mesmerizing.
After we'd finished breakfast, I looked at my watch and said, "It's still early, how about we go do one of the things I'd planned?"
"Austin," she said hesitating. "I'm not sure..."
"It won't put you in a compromising position, I promise," I said putting my hand over my heart then raising it up to the air. She burst into giggles as I held my hand up in a perfect Boy Scout salute.
"Okay, fine," she agreed. "This one thing, let's go do it."
I smiled and offered her my hand as I stood up. We walked out to the waiting car and got inside. Once inside the car, I pulled her to me and put my arms around her.
"I just need to hold you close," I said. "I've wanted to do this ever since I let you go that night in L.A."
"Mmmm, it feels so nice," she said as she leaned against me and looked out the window. "Where are we going?"
"It's a surprise," I said as I bent my head and nuzzled her neck.
"Austin, you promised!" she laughed as she wrapped her arms over mine and rested her head on my shoulder. I was content just holding her like this all the way to the helipad.
When we arrived, I got out of the car and pulled her with me. She looked at the helicopter and then back at me with a confused expression.
"Let's go see the Grand Canyon, shall we?" I said as I helped her up the steps into the jump seat and handed her a pair of earphones.
"Oh, Austin!" she gasped as she looked out the window during takeoff. "This is incredible!"
"Wait till we get over the canyon and you can see it all!" I shouted into the mic. "It's breathtaking!"
Emily grabbed my hand and squeezed it tightly as she looked out at the view of the canyon. Before us stretched hundreds of miles of striated rock cut by deep crevices that allowed the river water to flow through. The pilot dipped down into a canyon and we watched the rock walls rise up around us as the engulfed the copter and dwarfed its occupants.
"Pretty amazing, isn't it?" I shouted into the mic. The whirring of the copter blades made it difficult to talk, but the look in Emily's eyes told me all I needed to know. Her eyes were shining like a kid on Christmas morning, and she squeezed my hand with every new breathtaking view we encountered.
The landscape of the canyon was spectacular as we flew down into the crevices and looked out at the walls formed by layers of rock millions of years old. The natural beauty was overwhelming and Emily and I took it all in together.
We'd been flying for almost an hour when the pilot informed me that it was time to head back to the base. We were running low on fuel and he needed to set the copter down. I agreed with his assessment and as we flew back to the base I shouted, "Are you hungry yet?" Emily nodded and I smiled back at her and shouted, "Don't worry, I know just the place!"
We set down at the base site and thanked the pilot for the spectacular ride, then got back in the waiting car and headed toward the best roadside grill in the state of Nevada. I knew the owner and he had agreed to prepare his specialty on the condition that I brought a guest rather than eating alone as I usually did.
We pulled up to what looked like a small stand in the middle of nowhere. It had a cart with a grill set up behind it, but when we got out,
we could see that behind the cart, out of the line of sight on the highway, was a small tent with its sides raised. Underneath it were numerous tables with benches on either side.
"Farouk!" I called. "How are you, my friend?"
"Austin," replied the smiling man. "It is so good to see you! And you have brought a guest, I see."
"Indeed, I have," I smiled. "Farouk, this is Emily. Emily, this is my good friend and favorite chef, Farook Chaouqui."
"It's nice to meet you, Mr. Chaouqui," Emily said as she offered her hand.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Emily," Farook smiled as he shook her hand. "Please, won't you come in and sit down?"
"You promised your specialty, my friend," I reminded him.
"Ah yes, I did, didn't I?" he laughed. "Very well, then I will make the specialty for both of you!"
Farook's assistant brought out tea and a basket of fresh warm pita bread and set it down in front of us on the table. He poured us each a glass of steaming hot tea from an impossible height, and then swiftly disappeared. I could smell the scent of lamb coming from the grill, but I refrained from calling out and asking Farook what was cooking. I knew he took a great deal of pleasure in presenting the plates once he'd prepared everything, and I didn't want to ruin his surprise.
Emily and I chatted about the helicopter ride and the incredible beauty of the canyon. She'd never seen the canyon from that vantage point and had been intoxicated by its grandness.
"It made me feel so very insignificant," she said as she sipped her tea and popped a small piece of pita in her mouth. "It made me realize that whatever I'm facing is pretty insignificant in the larger scheme of things."
"That's interesting," I said thoughtfully. "I always feel the opposite after I take that ride. Like my life is of incredible importance and that I need to take advantage of everything that comes my way because it's the only way I can leave my lasting impression."
"You don't think that's arrogant?" she asked innocently.
"No, I think that if I wanted to write my name on the canyon as proof of my importance, that that would be profoundly arrogant," I explained. "But when I look at the majestic beauty of the Grand Canyon, I'm reminded that everything in life is important. Small streams of water slowly wearing away at the rock over time formed the canyon. If I want to make a lasting impression, then I need to be deliberate and patient like the water, but also relentless."