“I did last eve, Dominus, after the mishap,” Hierocles said, his eyes bright. “I found no other weaknesses.”
The doctoré’s brows came together in a frown. “I checked as well this morning and I have to agree with him. But there were problems with some of the armor. When I examined them this morning several of the leather straps had stretched. It might have happened in the bouts last night. If they are not repaired it will make the gladiator who wears it more vulnerable.”
Caelius pinned Hierocles with a sharp look. Judging from the nervous expression on his face he had either known about the problem and had chosen not to tell him or he had overlooked the condition of the armor in his zeal to examine the weapons. Either way, the thought of Hierocles being in charge of the equipment anymore with the Lupercalia looming was unpalatable at best.
“Gratitude, Doctoré.” Caelius almost sent him away to deal with Hierocles in private so the man wouldn’t be humiliated by his presence and then changed his mind. The doctoré was in charge of the ludus and he should be present to hear his decision since it would affect the doctoré’s domain.
“Hierocles, you are being moved to other duties starting today.” Hierocles’s mouth opened in protest and Caelius waved him silent with an abrupt gesture, too aggravated to listen to his excuses. “You swore to me that you were up to the duties, that you had experience with weaponry and armor.”
“Dominus, I do and I have taken excellent care. I would have noticed the armor and cared for it given time.” Hierocles glared at the doctoré who looked back at him with an impassive expression.
Caelius straightened, furious again. Well, that answered one question. Hierocles had not known that the armor needed tending to. “May I ask what you were doing this morning while the doctoré was seeing to your tasks?”
Hierocles turned a dull red and Caelius decided that he was done with hearing any more. He rose and thanked the doctoré again, dismissing him before returning to Hierocles, who tried again to argue his case.
“Enough,” Caelius cut in with a hard stare. “My decision has been made, Hierocles, and you only have your own carelessness to blame. Report to Felix and he will assign new duties to you. Now.”
“You are summoned.”
Gaidres looked up from his meal at the guard who stood there looking as though he wished he had been given any other duty in the world. Gaidres didn’t say anything and went back to eating.
No more. He was through playing along with Caelius’s fantasy of life and the world and their relationship. Relationship. The son of a whore had tried to order him. If nothing else would have reaffirmed Gaidres’s status as nothing more than a slave, that had. Caelius could prattle on about love and equality and life being what you make it, but the truth was Gaidres’s life had been decided for him and there was no remolding it now. He was done letting anyone try and fool him to think otherwise. And to think he had been on the verge of telling Caelius of his decision to lay aside his plans for revenge.
Demos sat across from him, glancing back and forth between Gaidres and the perplexed guard, now looking as though he wasn’t sure whether he ought to force Gaidres or not. Gaidres dared him to try.
“Dominus requires your presence.”
Gaidres didn’t blink, just kept eating.
“Argon…” Demos began.
Gaidres cut him a sharp glance. “Cease.” He sat upright and turned to face the guard, eyes narrowing. “You may tell Dominus that if he wishes to speak to me he can come and try to drag me to his rooms himself.” Gaidres snorted as he turned back to his bowl. “I wager he hasn’t the balls to do so.” Though the image of Caelius storming into the ludus and attempting to drag Gaidres anywhere was amusing.
The guard stayed for another moment or two, then scowled and disappeared. Gaidres had expected as much. His dominus was too gentle to ever condone the guard physically forcing Gaidres to obey, and the guard knew it. He’d be more likely to be reprimanded for such a thing than thanked for following orders.
Demos watched the guard go and then gave Gaidres a confused look. “Did I miss some important scene in your play? Why are you refusing Dominus’s summons?”
Gaidres flicked his gaze up, then back down, tearing a bite off his bread. “It is none of your concern.”
Demos laughed. “I beg to differ. ’Tis the master of us both that you deny, remember. I somehow doubt his mood will be so congenial if you refuse him his favorite pastime.”
Gaidres bristled, tossed what remained of his bread down into his bowl and looked up at his friend. “And that is why I have no intention of bending to him.”
Demos looked as if Gaidres were speaking a foreign language. He shook his head and narrowed his eyes. “Have I mentioned that you are a fool?”
“More than once, yes.”
“Well, I am mentioning it again. It bears repeating.”
Gaidres snorted. “You know not of what you speak. Keep to your business, friend, and I shall keep to mine.”
By the gods, Caelius and the way he’d seemed to overtake every aspect of Gaidres’s life was infuriating! Gaidres had made more than one concession last night and it had not been enough. Hide away from him, Caelius had said. Gaidres scowled. He was not hiding. He was accepting his fate.
“Your business?” Demos gave him a hard look. “You forget that your rebellion against our dominus affects us all.”
“He asks too much, Demos. I will say nothing more.”
Demos sighed, his demeanor softening. “Perhaps it is time you take notice that he asks at all, when by all rights he could simply take.” With that, Demos rose, leaving Gaidres to his spinning thoughts.
Gaidres watched him go with a scowl before returning to his fuming thoughts. Caelius was wrong. Gaidres did not care what the Romans thought of him. What he cared about was the fact that the Romans would not stand for it. Slaves had been freed before, and he was not blind to that fact. In fact, the arena where he would be competing during the Lupercalia was built by a former slave. It happened.
But that was not what this was. Caelius had skipped one crucial step in his daydream plan. Gaidres would never, could never, love a Roman.
Their argument the night before was fresh and he was certain Caelius would not be surprised to hear his refusal. Caelius had said once that if Gaidres were to refuse him he would allow it and would find someone else to serve him in that way. Well…let him now.
A tense line seemed to be burrowing its way between Caelius’s brow and had been ever since his fight with Gaidres. He frowned down at the papers scattering the table, realizing that once again his thoughts had drifted back to his stubborn lover. For two weeks Gaidres had ignored his summons every night. Caelius’s emotions had swung from astonishment, to hurt, to exasperation. He didn’t know what to do to talk with him again short of dragging him from the cell and angering him further.
Perhaps he could empty the ludus of everyone but Gaidres. That was an idea. The infuriating man couldn’t ignore him then. Caelius’s fingers drummed on the table, the papers forgotten until Felix gave him a discreet cough. Caelius sighed and tried to concentrate on the reports before him until the sound of Faustus wailing came as a welcome relief.
Caelius looked up as Helene entered with an apologetic expression. “Apologies, Dominus, but he refuses to settle down. I don’t understand what has been bothering him of late.”
Caelius rose, holding out his arms for his son. “Here, I’ll take him for a while. Maybe he just needs a change of hands. I’ll walk with him.”
Faustus’s face was red with temper, screwed up into a grimace and his body wiggled within his wrappings. Caelius cradled him in the crook of his arm and brushed his son’s cheek with his finger. “Stop that.” Faustus’s eyes popped open to stare in astonishment at him and then his mouth opened on another wail.
Caelius strode away, making soothing sounds as he did. Faustus no doubt was picking up on the tension in him and when Caelius was tense, the whole household seemed to ec
ho his emotions.
“You miss him too, don’t you?” Even after they’d returned to Fidena, Caelius had made sure that Gaidres had some time with his son every day, knowing how much Gaidres had enjoyed the visits. Only they hadn’t happened lately. “Maybe if I tell him how miserable you are he’ll stop being so stubborn.”
Caelius felt just as miserable and alone, only he didn’t think telling Gaidres that would get him anywhere. Maybe he had been wrong about Gaidres’s changing feelings toward him.
“Dominus!”
Caelius’s head jerked up at the sound of Nikodemos’s grim voice. The guard stood in the doorway, his expression strained. “What is it?”
“Word from Caere, Dominus. There was a fire in the stables.”
Caelius’s heart lurched. “Was anyone killed?”
“No, Dominus, there were some injuries and some of the horses had to be destroyed. All of the fodder is gone as well and the stable was gutted.”
Caelius’s mind raced. It was only two weeks until the Lupercalia and he was torn between his dueling duties. He could get to Caere, oversee the cleanup and make sure everything was well in hand and still return in time for the festival that he dreaded. He would be tired but it was doable. For a moment he was inspired. He could take Gaidres with him and linger overlong. If Gaidres missed the Lupercalia…Caelius sighed. He’d lose whatever chance he had of winning Gaidres’s heart. If his gladiator was furious with him now, he’d be doubly so then.
“Ready your guard, Nikodemos. We leave for Caere at dawn.” Then he looked down at his son as a thought occurred to him. If bringing Faustus to Gaidres destroyed some of his lover’s defenses, Caelius refused to feel guilty for his tactics. Gaidres should be reminded of what he was missing in his self-imposed isolation. It might give his stubborn lover something to think of while they were parted.
Gaidres stared up at the ceiling, one arm under his head. A moment later, he noticed that the ludus had grown very quiet. With a frown, he sat up, glancing around. It was never this quiet. There was always the sound of snoring, or shifting, or someone pleasuring himself or on occasion a pair pleasuring each other. But now there was only silence.
What was going on?
Scowling, Gaidres pushed to his feet, approaching the slatted door to his cell and glancing out. The ludus was empty. How distracted must he have been by his own thoughts to not have noticed the ludus being emptied? And why?
He frowned and shook at the door. “Guard!”
There was no answer and he was about to shout again when movement caught his eyes at the entrance to the gladiator quarters. His eyes widened in shock as Caelius approached his cell. For a moment he was so startled by Caelius being there that he didn’t notice the small, wailing bundle in his arms. When he did, he gaped.
“What do you think you are about? The babe should not be here!” The ludus was no place for an infant.
Caelius turned Faustus in his arms so that he could see Gaidres. His wailing stopped, but the fretful expression on his little face wrenched Gaidres’s heart. “He has missed you,” Caelius said. “Since you have refused to leave your cell he has not seen you and since I am leaving at dawn for Caere I don’t know when you’ll have the opportunity to see him again.”
Gaidres had reached through the bars so he could touch Faustus and his hand froze as he looked at Caelius. “What do you mean leave at dawn? What has happened? Is it her family?” If Valeriana’s family had dared disregard his warning…
Caelius shook his head. “No, there was a fire and some injuries. I go to make sure they have everything they need to rebuild and restock.”
Before Gaidres could press for more details, Caelius unlocked the cell door and handed Faustus to him. Gaidres’s eyes went wide with surprise, but he could no sooner not take the babe than he could stop the sun from rising. “Hold him. I know not when you’ll get a chance again and he has been keeping the entire villa awake with his anger.”
Gaidres’s stomach pitched as Caelius gave him no choice but to take the babe. The boy’s dark eyes, so like his father’s, blinked up at him and he let out one of those small chirps that Gaidres had become accustomed to while they were in Caere.
But the sound did not give him the usual pleasure. It echoed off the walls of his cell and Gaidres felt nauseated. “He does not belong here!” Gaidres pushed past Caelius, toward the entrance to the courtyard. Faustus did not belong anywhere near a cell. Gaidres cradled him as they emerged into the moonlight of the courtyard, able to breathe easier now. “There now, little one.”
Caelius followed, watching Gaidres. “As I said, I leave in the morning for Caere and Faustus has missed you. I see you have missed him, as well.”
Gaidres glanced up, eyes narrowed. “Do not bring him in there again, Caelius.”
“I would not have had to if you would come to my chamber when I request it.”
Gaidres glanced back down at the infant, unable to help the smile that tugged at his lips as the babe appeared to be sticking his tongue out at him. “There is nothing to be said.”
Caelius sighed. “We disagree on that, but fortunately for you I will not be here to argue with for a time. I wanted to be sure you were aware and to allow my son a visit.”
Gaidres’s head jerked up. “You do not bring him with you.”
“Of course I do. Helene will accompany me, as will a full guard. There is no need to worry.”
Gaidres didn’t like it, then cursed himself for even caring. So instead of protesting, as he’d been about to, he nodded. “I will see to it that the men are ready for the Lupercalia in your absence, Dominus.”
“I have no doubt that you will. And I do intend on being back before then.” There were unspoken things in Caelius’s eyes and guilt tugged at Gaidres. That he felt guilty at all irked him.
Faustus lifted his head, turning his face toward them each as if following the conversation. “I see he holds himself steady now.” Gaidres beamed in pleasure. “I knew you could do it, little one.”
“Yes, he does and his voice is very penetrating when he’s unhappy. You have been spared that.”
Gaidres looked up and their eyes met as they stared at each other in silence. It seemed as if a wealth of words were said in that glance and nothing at all was resolved.
Faustus chirped again to grab his attention and then cooed as Gaidres beamed down at him and stroked his cheek. He had missed the babe terribly. He didn’t want to say it, but he had missed Caelius, as well. It was much easier to admit his attachment to Faustus. Then the moment was over as Gaidres handed the infant back with a soft sigh of regret.
“I am sure you have many details to see to before you go. Gratitude for letting me see him, Dominus, but do not bring him here again.”
It was good that Caelius was going to Caere. For now the man knew that Gaidres could not ignore his next summons. If he tried, all Caelius would need to do was send word that he would be bringing Faustus to the ludus for a visit instead.
“A moment more, please, Gaidres.” Caelius turned Faustus in his arms so that the babe faced Gaidres. “You have not given me a chance to apologize and I would do so now.”
Gaidres stiffened and he shook his head. “Apologies are not necessary, Dominus.”
“They are. I should never have tried to order you not to fight in the Lupercalia. I was wrong and I knew it the moment I spoke. I should not have tried to take your choice away from you.” Caelius bit his lip and looked down at his son. “It was the action of a desperate man who feared to lose you. I spoke to you of love and then drove you away. It was foolish of me.”
Gaidres was weary of being angry, and the apology was genuine. He sighed. “Gratitude for that, Dominus. You were within your rights to do so, though it irks me to admit it.”
Caelius nodded, exhaling with a resigned look. “Be careful in your training while I am away. I wish to find you whole and sound when I return.”
Silence reigned for a moment more before, as one, they turned and be
gan to cross the courtyard together.
Back in the ludus, Caelius reached through the bars and cupped Gaidres’s cheek, his thumb brushing over his jaw. “You will be in my thoughts.”
Gaidres’s jaw flexed. “I wish you a safe journey, there and back.” He felt a weight on him, words heavy on his tongue. There was more, but he did not know what, and for a long moment they stared at each other.
Then, as if he’d just realized that he wasn’t going to get handed back to Gaidres, Faustus shrieked.
Gaidres flinched and took a step forward, but the slatted door stood between them and what could he do to comfort either of them anyway? Caelius crooned to the child, bouncing him, then looked back up at Gaidres with regret. Gaidres gestured to the open door leading to the courtyard.
“Go. Take him. He is unhappy here.”
Caelius shook his head, his voice soft but still audible over Faustus’s wails. “So are you.” Then he turned and strode out, the echo of the babe’s cry seeming to linger long after Gaidres knew he was too far away.
Gaidres’s eyes stung and he sank down to his pallet, burying his head in his hands. In truth, they would likely be just fine. But Caere was so far away. And the fire made Gaidres anxious. What if Valeriana’s family had caused it? There were so many dangers. He kicked the floor of his cell in frustration. He had not felt this helpless in a long time. Not since…Gaidres’s eyes closed as he saw Kerses falling to the Roman’s sword.
They would be fine. He repeated it to himself long into the night.
Chapter Eighteen
Gaidres paced, ignoring the wine and fine meal that had been provided to them this night. The Lupercalia was the next day and he was sure Caelius had sent the feast both to provide extra strength and morale, and because for some of them, it would be a last meal.
“Argon, are you not eating? You’re a—”
The Gladiator’s Master Page 22