My jaw dropped. I’d expected something like a kidney bean, small and lifeless. Instead I saw a live, kicking little baby taking up the entire screen. You could count ten little fingers and toes, you saw the spine, and even the mouth opened and closed. It moved its head and all four limbs, and when it stretched out on the screen I actually felt a small push against the organs inside of me.
“You’ve got quite an active one, there,” the doctor commented.
“That’s the baby?” I said, louder than I had intended. “I thought that was just indigestion.” A few of the other medical personnel in the room stifled giggles.
“In another few weeks you’ll be able to feel it placing your hand over your stomach.” The doctor smiled down at me.
I felt a small, unexpected tear roll out of the corner of my eye. I tried convincing myself it was a reaction to the old screen, but I knew better. I wiped it away quickly, feeling a little silly at being so sentimental. I glanced at Micah to make sure he hadn’t seen, but he was too busy staring at the screen with the same shocked, blank face he had had in the forest.
I squeezed his hand to elicit some sort of response and he glanced at me, then back at the screen.
“Say something,” I urged, trying to keep my voice as low as possible.
He looked at me again and seemed to snap out of it. “It’s just, so real.”
“Yeah,” I agreed, realizing all he had promised me was finally dawning on him. My breath caught, and I was suddenly wondering if he was truly ready for this. I didn’t necessarily have a choice; he did.
The doctor interrupted my thoughts. “Do you want to know the gender?”
“Oh, um. I don’t know,” I said, unprepared. “I guess so. You can tell?”
“Let’s take a look here.” He took a few minutes to zoom in on the baby’s legs, trying different angles. Suddenly, he announced, “Here we go – you see a leg here, and a leg here, and nothing in between!” He waited for our response but all he got was blank stares in return. “It’s a girl.” He sounded disappointed for having to spell it out for us.
Micah let out a strangled sort of laugh. I didn’t say anything, letting it sink in. Suddenly, Shawn’s words buzzed in my head. The ability to do what we do runs in our blood. The world grew cold, almost grayed out. There can never be two Gaias that practice our ways at once. His words kept echoing back and forth. The ability to do what we do—
“Kaitlyn, Kaitlyn! Wake up!”
Micah’s voice broke through. I sat up, unfamiliar with the cold tiles touching my skin. “What happened?”
“You fainted and rolled off the cot.” He attempted to get in between two of the other nurses to help me up.
Too many hands were helping me; I felt claustrophobic.
“I have to get out of here.” I grabbed for clean rags to wipe off my belly and pulled down my shirt, jetting out of the room before anyone could think to stop me.
“Wait!” Micah called after me. I caught a glimpse of him as I rounded the corner. He was caught up in the pile of medical staff, wires and the overturned cot.
I ignored him and kept running, temporarily confused by the maze of basement hallways. Anxious to get out of there before Micah caught up, I stopped and closed my eyes. I felt for my new partner, the wind element, to figure out where the freshest air was. Following it up two flights of stairs, I found my way out of the building quicker than I would have using my sense of direction. Blindly, I made my way through the thickest part of the gardens; the part that was more like a forest.
Micah, much to my chagrin, managed to catch me, and wasn’t gentle in stopping me. “What is wrong with you!”
“Me?!” I jerked my shoulder away, rubbing it where his fingers had dug in. “What is wrong with me?”
“Yes!” he yelled back.
“I’m having a baby girl; that is what’s wrong with me!” I threw my hands up. “She is my responsibility, whether I like it or not.”
“So?”
“So, what if she is blessed with the same curse we are? What if she grows to be just as strong of a Gaia as me, or stronger?”
Comprehension slowly started to dawn across his features.
“What if she’s my replacement? Who will you choose to eliminate for your precious organization?” I gave him a second to think. “Well, who will it be? Mother or daughter?”
Micah was stunned into silence, searching for the right answer to my question. He didn’t realize there was no right answer.
“I don’t think that is something we have to worry about until we know for sure…” he finally stuttered out a response.
“Yes it is! The life of their child is something a parent should worry about from day one!” Of course he wasn’t ready for such an undertaking, completely unfit to follow through with his promises.
On a roll now, I questioned him about something that had been bothering me since Wyoming. “What were you planning with Shawn? What changed once you found out I was pregnant?”
Now Micah rubbed at the back of his neck.
“From now on, only truth between us. I want you to tell me everything.” I mimicked his hardened voice, cajoling him to come clean as I had.
He took a deep breath, “We knew Shawn wanted to recruit you. And we were going to let him.”
Words stuck in my throat, “I’m sorry, what?”
“I was there only to put a tracker on you, or him – whatever I could manage. We had each direction covered, we weren’t going to let you far from sight.” He was speaking quickly now. “It would have been only until we found his base of operations. A quick trip – then you would be out of there while we closed him down.”
“You were going to let me go back to him?” I felt like I had been punched in the gut.
“Even with Shawn gone, we had to be sure nobody would continue his work. And remember, this was the plan before I knew what he did to you. Knowing what I do now, I would never have agreed to it.”
“Agreed to it? Whose plan was it, then? Susan’s? Vayu’s?”
He shook his head, “We didn’t let Susan know the whole plan. We thought you two were too close and that she might divulge some of the information. We couldn’t risk Shawn finding out through you.”
Shock turned to anger. I conjured a net of wind, materializing only after it passed me, catching him and throwing him back into a particularly thorny bush. I tied off the streams of energy to make the net last as long as possible before it disintegrated, before he could right himself, I stormed off into the forest.
Before long, I came to an opening with a large pond. It was the same pond, almost the same exact spot, Cato had used for my saining ritual.
What a perfect coincidence, I thought, heading for the tree Micah and Shawn had used with their rifle sights set on my forehead during the ritual.
Instead of skirting the pond, I swam through it, fully clothed, uncaring. As I emerged, shivering and soaked to the bone, I immediately regretted my decision. Micah sent a telepathic message to me. He felt the cold, and was trying to radiate warmth. Wait, the word came to me, I’ll take care of you. Make it all better.
Hell if I was going to let that happen. I filled my head with static, letting it get louder and louder. Once it was as big and steady as I could manage, I sent it out. It shot straight at Micah through the forest like an arrow. I heard his scream echo over the pond and felt a guilty sense of pleasure. Good to know I hadn’t lost my touch. It would go away in a moment, but it certainly sent a message. If logic prevailed, he’d leave me alone.
I made my way to the same tree with little trouble. The seasons had changed and so had the landscape, but the same tree was there. Small branches stuck out in just the right places for me to make my way to the small perch twenty feet above the ground or so. My awkward body shape made climbing difficult, but I managed with a little extra help from wind I created pushing me up. I found a seat; secure in the same place Micah and Shawn sat before. Anchoring one foot around the large trunk of the tree, I felt
stable enough to stop concentrating on holding on and sat back.
I took several deep breaths in, releasing them slowly while I tried to calm down. I let my mind wander, thinking mostly of the baby girl growing inside of me. She gave me a small kick in return. I smiled. Birds began to return to the tree, landing around me, having been disturbed by my initial ascent. With my view of the calm lake I could spot fish under the surface of the water.
I almost felt relaxed enough to drift off. Sleep had a way of letting me forget for a moment all of the problems facing me. It was my preferred choice of defense as of late anyway. A commotion of flapping wings and annoyed squawks snapped me out of the blissful doze. The birds hopped and flapped, frantically trying to take flight from the tree. I didn’t see the large body drop beside me from above. The branch dipped suddenly, moaning under the stress of added weight. My hold on the tree came undone and for one terrifying moment I leaned too far in one direction with nothing but flimsy air beneath me. Just as I tucked my head in, bracing for the inevitable fall, a strong hand grasped my wrist and pulled me back to safety.
Safety might not have been the right word for it. The anger in his smoldering green eyes made me shrink back into the tree. He took advantage, crowding me with his large frame and holding my wrists in a grip of steel. Partly grateful to be pinned against the stable core of the tree, the other part of me almost would rather have fallen.
“What in the hell do you think you are doing?” Micah asked, his voice dangerously low. Images of him holding the high-powered rifle aimed directly at me flashed through my mind.
I tried to swallow my fear and put on a brave face. “I am trying to avoid you.” I swallowed, too aware I could not mask the tremor in my voice.
One side of his lip curled up in a snarl and I shrank back even further. “You are mine, as is the baby inside of you. By sitting up here you are putting both at risk.” My fear seemed to feed his anger.
My eyes lit up; the heat in my voice matched his. “You say that now, but you can change your mind at any minute. You would have to choose between us and the rules you’ve served your entire life. I don’t think even you are sure what you would choose.” I swallowed the lump in my throat and lowered my voice. “I can’t take the chance that you’ll make the wrong decision.”
He leaned away from me and let go of my wrists. “What are you thinking about doing?”
I took a deep breath in, drawing in the strength. “I’m thinking about leaving. For good.”
“You would leave me?” His brows rose from anger to shock.
“For the life of my daughter, I think I would do just about anything,” I said. Spoken like a true mother, Susan would be proud.
He sat back, withdrawing into his own mind. I rubbed the red marks he had left behind on my wrists and waited.
Finally he spoke one word, “No.”
It was as casual as if he were turning down cream for his coffee, and just as definitive. It was not up for debate.
I stood on the branch, wobbling the whole way. “I’m not going to be a prisoner ever again, Micah. I’ve had enough of that.”
He stood too, and we both performed a balancing act on the shaky branch – me trying to refuse his help and him insisting I take it. “Fine then, you can leave, but I’m going with you.”
I scoffed. “It isn’t the Chakra I need to get away from, it is you!”
“No,” he said again, with the same resolution in his voice. “It’s too much of a risk with Shawn out there, not to mention the risk of losing control of your powers.”
He steadied us both, pressing me into the truck once again. I avoided his face but had to know. “Is that the only reason?”
Lifting my chin, he forced me to look into his eyes. “Kaitlyn, I need you as much as you need me. That is a cold, hard fact. Not an opinion.”
Even as he said the words I understood the truth in them. Had I managed to get away I would have done nothing but think about returning to him. It would have been the worst mental torture I could’ve put myself through.
He leaned in to kiss me, hard and fast, shocking me into submission. His body pressed into mine and the rough bark of the tree scraped my back through my thin shirt. I attempted to squirm away, the bark only scratching more. “Micah, you’re hurting me.”
“I can heal you later,” he responded in between kisses, reminding me the pleasure was well worth the temporary pain. Suddenly, I received images from him. His lips continued to press into mine, but a mental connection I wasn’t prepared for was made. I saw him and Shawn, on the night of my saining, sitting on the exact same branch as now.
At the sight of Shawn, my whole body tensed. Micah tightened his hold on me. “Relax, I have to show you this. I have to show you my side.” His kiss was persistent, and the images were crystal clear, much clearer than what Shawn showed me or what I could have possibly shown Micah.
I let the scene dance in my head, only because I did not want to stop the sensation of his lips on mine.
Shawn spoke, “Just making sure you are prepared to do what needs to be done.”
“She’ll do the right thing,” Micah said defensively.
Shawn took Micah’s rifle from him, studying it. He snorted. “The scope isn’t even turned on.” Shawn flipped it on, and Micah watched him aim it directly at me, across the pond. The lump I felt in my throat was Micah’s. His hands began to shake as he silently retrieved a small pistol from his side pocket, kept hidden from Shawn’s view. Memories of them playing together as boys ran through Micah’s head, and therefore mine. His thumb felt to make sure the safety was off, but his eyes never left Shawn’s trigger finger. He was prepared to use it on his own brother; the one friend he had since childhood. It was all in my defense; a woman he had barely met weeks prior.
I opened my eyes, bringing back the reality of the tree and the man who held on to me tighter than anyone ever had before. Tears streamed down my face. “I knew it. I knew you wouldn’t have done it.”
He didn’t bother to wipe away my tears. Mist in his own green eyes appeared and the strain in his voice made the mist all that much more real. “I’d share with you what I went through when you were taken, but I’ll spare you that torture.” He held my face in his hands and almost shook me as he said, “Promise me you’ll never leave me, Kaitlyn. Not of your own free will. I couldn’t bear it.”
I hesitated.
“Promise me!”
“I promise,” I put as much compassion in my voice as I could manage.
“As do I,” he repeated the phrase a few more times but still shook his head. “It’s not enough, not enough.”
“What else can I give you?” It was an honest question.
His eyes suddenly brightened and a smile creased his mouth. “Marry me.”
I let out a shocked squeak from the back of my throat. “Are you proposing?”
“Yes, we’ll get married tomorrow – or at least perform a handfasting until we can do a legal ceremony in the states.” He wasn’t looking at me now, eyes moving as if he was running through the plans in his head.
“Wait, you’re answering for me now?”
“Yes, I am. We are going to get married!” The excitement in his voice was contagious, and he swept me up in another kiss. The kiss mimicked his character; neither would be denied.
In the next few minutes he had us both down from the tree safely, and was rushing us into the building. He stopped at my room and opened the door for me. “I can’t stay with you tonight; that would be bad luck.”
I just nodded. Somehow I had gone from thoughts of leaving him to wedding plans in a matter of minutes. He certainly kept life interesting. He produced a flower from behind his back; a lily from the gardens. I hadn’t seen him grab on the way in.
“I will take care of everything. Sleep well tonight, ah muirnen. I love you.” He kissed me gently on the forehead, pushed me back into the room, and took his leave, closing the door behind him.
“Love you, too,” I whi
spered back, from behind closed doors.
Chapter 12
Cords of Blood
The next morning, I awoke to feet shuffling back and forth down the hallway outside of my bedroom door. Hushed voices floated by, but they were tinged with excitement so that every other syllable was spoken louder than intended. It did nothing for those still trying to sleep.
“Like me!” I yelled at them.
No one responded.
I squinted at the clock, trying to determine the time without letting too much of the green light pierce my eyes. It was already technically afternoon and I groaned, feeling I could use a few more hours of rest. I rolled back over; rubbing the sleep from my eyes trying to think what could have caused so much excitement.
“Oh, God!” I shot upright in bed, suddenly recalling Micah’s proposal. I flung the sheets off of me and stepped into the hall. There were more people bustling from room to room than I even thought resided at the Chakra.
I tried getting someone’s attention, “Excuse me.”
The man didn’t even notice intent on some task.
Another man came from the opposite direction.
“Oh, can you…”
He mumbled an apology and kept going. In his defense his arms were full of raw, packaged meat.
Finally I saw Susan stepping lightly toward me. Not taking a chance of being dismissed again, I took her gruffly by the arm and pulled her into my room. “What is going on?” I asked, exasperated.
“Oh, you’re awake.” She poked her head out into the hallway again. “Laura – she’s awake. Bring the bathing basket.” Susan turned her attention back to me, quickly moving on to making my bed, as though she couldn’t stand being still. “We need to get you ready for the handfasting ceremony.”
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