“The baby survived the ‘sheep dip,’ and even had a fresh diaper and gown put on. The gown was back to front, but the baby didn’t seem to mind. That little guy would be eleven years old now, and I bet his dad changed half his diapers and gave him his bath each night when he was small.
“Babies are tough, Beth. Look at what Paul’s been through today, and the little fella’s fine. It’s no wonder you’re overly anxious after what happened to Cody. There’s nothing wrong in admitting you need help to get through being a mother to a new baby again.”
“I know,” Beth admitted. “I know you’re right. I’ve been lying here thinking about it, and even though I wish this accident hadn’t happened, maybe it was just meant to be. Maybe this is what I need. I’m going to get help, Cheryl. The second I come to from the operation, I’m going to ask for someone to come and talk to me. What Hal and Flynn and I have got—it’s just too good to let it slip away when there’s help out there.”
“I’m proud of you,” Cheryl offered, and even if it sounded a bit corny, it was heartfelt. “So proud of you, Beth.”
“Can I have Paul in with me? I’ll honestly sleep better if he’s beside me, and the second he wakes, I’ll send Flynn to come and get you.”
Cheryl hesitated for a second, but Beth needed her boys near. “When he’s had his bottle and been changed, I’ll bring him in beside you. But in the meantime, I want you to try to get some rest.”
“Wish you were here.” Beth smiled sleepily. “I wish there was someone like you in Turning Point who could actually point us in the right direction.”
WHEN CHERYL WALKED into the living room, she saw Noah silhouetted against the window, the baby cradled in his arms like a football. Hearing her enter, he pressed a finger to his lips, indicating for her to be quiet.
Making her way over to the sofa, she climbed beneath the blanket and lay back on the cushions simply watching. The moon provided enough light through the taped-up window that she could see the silhouette of his dark torso. His muscular arms cradled the infant, his hair flopping forward as he stared down at the baby. Cheryl felt a lump in her throat. Everything she wanted was there for the taking if only she could summon the courage to say yes. For two years she’d vowed that if love ever came along again it would be on her terms, that her career would always be her mainstay. Yet here she was, a mere whisper away from throwing caution to the wind and allowing herself to be caught up in the dream that was Noah Arkin.
“Penny for them.” Making his way over, Noah sat on the sofa beside her. Paul was making sweet baby sounds as he dreamed his milky dreams, and she saw Noah’s soft smile, felt the warmth of his gaze.
“I’m just thinking that I wish this night would never end.”
He gave a slow nod, understanding blazing in his eyes.
“Beth wants Paul in with her.” Cheryl’s fingers brushed the baby’s soft cheeks. “I said that once he was settled I’d bring him in.”
Noah nodded, staring down at the infant’s face, an expression she couldn’t read in his eyes. “Poor Cody.” He was looking back at Paul now, and when he spoke, his voice was low and thoughtful. “I’ll never forget that day as long as I live.”
“It must have been awful.”
He nodded. “I knew then why I was a vet, Cheryl, and not a doctor. I couldn’t go through that again and live to tell the tale. I honestly don’t know how you do it. Doesn’t it get to you?”
“Oh, it gets to me.” Cheryl let out a weary sigh. “And anyone who says that it doesn’t is either lying or so completely burnt out that they don’t know what’s real anymore. But I guess at the end of the day, you just pray the good will outweigh the bad, and you console yourself that you save more lives than you lose.”
“It doesn’t put you off having kids?”
She shook her head.
“It did me.”
“You’ve just never met Ms. Right….” Cheryl mentally kicked herself and wished she could somehow take the words back. This sort of talk wasn’t going to get her anywhere. “I’d better get him back to Beth.”
“I’ll do it,” Noah offered, levering himself off the sofa and carefully placing the baby back into the crib. “She’ll probably rest better with both her boys beside her.”
Beth would rest easier with two of the people she loved most around her. Cheryl knew that. It was the same for her with Noah. The few hours they had been together felt so perfect, as if this was how life was supposed to be.
Would the fights that had crept up on her and Joe have happened if it had been her and Noah?
For the first time in her adult life, Cheryl didn’t automatically fold her clothes after she slipped them off. She just dropped the garments onto the floor as she pondered her conundrum.
No, the fights wouldn’t have happened, she decided.
Because no matter how she played it, no matter how she tried to imagine Noah as a twentysomething student, somehow she knew that despite his focus, despite his inner desire to succeed in his chosen field, it wouldn’t have been at the expense of her happiness. There was nothing remotely selfish about the man who was now crossing the room toward her, unself-consciously discarding his clothes, disarming her with a seductive smile before pulling back the crumpled blankets and climbing in beside her. His body was cool, and he drew warmth from her as he eased alongside her. And though the desire was there, the urgency was gone, allowing time for a more languid discovery.
He was like an open book.
Which didn’t mean predictable, Cheryl mused as he ran a strong hand down the length of her side, capturing the hollow of her waist and the curve of her hip as she turned to face him. He was the kind of book where you glimpsed a page and just knew you wanted to go on—to turn the pages and find out the secrets within.
So why couldn’t she stay?
“Just us two,” he whispered.
“Just us,” she breathed back, running a lazy finger around his nipple, feeling the swell of his manhood nudging her thigh. His hand was still working its magic, but was more insistent now, massaging the soft marshmallow of her inner thighs as his lips found hers, kissing the hollows of her throat with a reverence that made her dizzy. Her hand crept to his back, feeling the taut muscles beneath her splayed fingers as his lips left hers. He blazed a trail of hot kisses along her throat, and each flick of his tongue had her sinking deeper into the moment. Her head arched back as he worked his way down to her breasts, teasing her with featherlight kisses. One hand was now stroking the soft down between her thighs, the teasing upward strokes light, yet finely attuned to her needs. She was torn between frustration and exhilaration, wanting so much to reciprocate, to feel him in her hands, to taste him with her mouth. Yet she was paralyzed with pleasure, content simply to lie there and let him take control.
“I’m going to take you to places you’ve never been,” he promised, his husky drawl doing the strangest things to her. “I’m going to give you some loving that you’ll never forget.”
He suckled the sweet pale flesh of her breast as his fingers worked on, and before she could beg him to end this delicious torture, she could feel the distant thrum of her orgasm. Her thighs taut, her pelvis tilting toward him, she uttered low moans of wonder, as he took her ever higher. The intensity of her orgasm was so overwhelming, she lay there spent and exhausted as the tremors abated. But when she felt his arousal nudging her trembling thighs apart, slipping inside her sweet warmth, there was nothing to do but wrap her legs around him and pull him deeper inside, scarcely able to comprehend that the shuddering train of her roller coaster hadn’t yet come to a halt.
Noah called her name as he exploded within her, and she came again, clinging to his muscular back. And this time her eyes were open, and so were Noah’s, both capturing the overwhelming beauty of the moment. The terror and ecstasy of the last thirty-six hours had all been condensed and suddenly released. Tears of pain and joy coursed down her cheeks, followed by exhausted, exhilarated sobs that needed no explanation as he hel
d her, loved her, adored her.
For the last time.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
TIME HAD NO MEANING NOW. It was almost impossible to comprehend that so much could happen in thirty-six hours. Nearly drowning. Being saved. Beth’s accident. Falling in love….
It was as if the world had been put on pause since Noah had pulled her from the river, minutes ticking away like hours, giving them plenty of time to get to know each other, enough time to cement the attraction that had been there from the first time they set eyes on each other.
But now God, or the powers that be, had clearly decided to get things moving. The darkness that had bathed them receded at an alarming rate. Gray fingers of dawn crept through the room. Birds that should surely stay quiet for an hour or so longer sang the dawn chorus with a gusto that under any other circumstances would have been beautiful.
“Stay.”
Even though she was facing away from him, Cheryl had known he wasn’t asleep. “I want to,” she admitted.
“But?” Noah asked, because clearly there was one.
“Please, Noah.” She shook her head, determined not to let him see her tears, knowing this was as hard on him as it was on her.
Harder perhaps.
Noah didn’t have any doubts. He seemed to have enough faith in their relationship for both of them, it was she who was torn with indecision, she, who for the first time in her adult life had no idea what to do.
“Even when Joe left, and when my parents broke up, I knew I’d be okay.” She lay silent for a moment, gripped with the same piercing grief that had swamped her at the end of her marriage. And even though it had been two full years, still she managed total recall of horrible, aching emptiness, the thudding disappointment that all the hope and love that had filled them at the start simply hadn’t been enough. “But as bad as it was, as awful as I felt there for a while, I had my work, Noah, and I had my pride. Even though I’d lost everything, I still had that little piece of me that no one could take away. No one, that is, except…” Turning, she looked up at him. “Except you, Noah.” He didn’t answer, just stared back at her as she asked the most difficult question of all. “Would you do it for me?”
She blinked at him in the dim morning light, taking in every flicker of his reaction. “I’m not asking you to hop on a plane tomorrow, but if things did work out between us, could you ever see yourself selling your practice and heading to California to set up shop in Courage Bay?”
She didn’t want him to answer, didn’t want to hear him say it, but the silence that hung between them was even worse somehow.
“Cheryl…”
“Don’t.” Slipping out from under the blanket, she sat for a moment on the edge of the sofa, running a trembling hand through her long dark hair before turning her confused eyes to his. “Don’t try to sweeten it, Noah, because we both know the answer.”
“You’re not being fair, Cheryl. I’ve got a life here now, a career. I’m the only vet for miles. I can’t just walk away. You’ve been in Courage Bay two years, your family lives in—”
“It’s still my home,” Cheryl broke in. “It’s still my life I’d be upending, and the bottom line is that you wouldn’t do it for me.”
“So that’s it, then.” His voice was raw, and her pain was so raw she couldn’t bring herself to look at him as he spoke. “You set me some impossible test, and when I don’t measure up, you walk away.”
“It’s not impossible, Noah. What I’m asking you to do is no more than you’d be asking from me.”
She pulled on her clothes. It was easier to be angry than admit to feeling the chasm of despair where her soul used to be.
“I’m going to get Beth and the boys ready….”
“Don’t go, Cheryl.”
A strong hand gripped her wrist, attempting to pull her back down onto their bed, but she shook him off, knowing one look, one touch and she would break down.
“Stay and talk.”
“There’s no point.” Heading for the door, she didn’t even turn around.
THE ATMOSPHERE was so tense in the house that she escaped to the shed and stood staring at the piglets’ wagging tails, her eyes so dry she couldn’t squeeze out a single tear.
“They’re on their way.” Noah was in the doorway, standing hesitant and unsure, but Buster had no such reserve. Slipping between Noah’s legs, she headed toward her mistress. Noah walked over more slowly. “I brought you these.” He handed her some clothing. “Just some old jeans and a sweater I shrunk in the wash. Figured you’d be more comfortable traveling in them.”
“I can only see eleven.” Gesturing to the baby pigs, she sniffed rather ungraciously, her eyes scanning the straw for the one that was missing.
“Yeah, it died,” Noah said in a matter-of-fact voice, then changed tack when he saw her face crumple. “Cheryl, it happens all the time. The mother overlays them, or they’re the runt. It’s just the way it is….”
He was trying to help, trying to say the right thing, but each word only wounded her further. God, why did everything have to make her cry? Accepting a tissue, she blew her nose loudly, then sniffed again. She managed a wobbly smile when finally she faced him.
“I’m doing you a favor, really,” she said.
“How did you work that one out?”
“Aren’t vets’ wives supposed to be salt-of-the-earth types?” Cheryl sniffed. “Rosy cheeks and practical natures? I’d never let you sell any of the piglets. We’d be overrun with eleven more Mabels. The dogs and Georgina would all be sporting pink bows. I’d ignore all your food charts, sneak Georgina chocolate….”
“Sounds good to me.”
She could hear the thud-thud of choppers in the distance, and it was almost a relief when Noah pushed open the massive rolling door. Buster whimpered in her arms, knowing something was up and begging for reassurance. But all Cheryl could do was cling to the short clipped fur, feel the solid weight of the little body in her arms and wish things didn’t have to be this way. They watched as the giant black bird swooped out of the sky, the trees bending beneath the power of the false wind the rotors created.
“Mitch is here, too!”
The surprise was evident in Noah’s voice, and Cheryl managed to lift herself out of her gloom long enough to head over. A fire department vehicle pulled up near the helicopter.
“The road must have cleared,” he concluded.
“Who’s the other guy?” Cheryl asked, mentally answering her own question as she registered the man’s pale, anxious face. He jumped out of the truck and ducked his head before running under the blades toward the house. “Hal?”
Noah nodded. “I’d better go and talk to him. You get dressed, I’ll meet you outside.”
He greeted the worried husband as Cheryl darted into the clinic bathroom to change, then wandered around, silently bidding goodbye to everything that had become familiar. She felt Buster’s cold nose against her hot tear-streaked cheeks, the worried whimpers matching her own feelings, and as she stroked the dog, soothed her, the whimpers faded, and Cheryl wished her own problems and fears could so easily be erased.
“Hey.”
The voice was reassuringly familiar, so much so that a fresh batch of tears pricked her eyes. Seeing the rough, knowing face of Mitch Kannon standing by the fire truck, Cheryl felt her resolve crumble. He wasn’t a fire chief all of a sudden, wasn’t a tough, assured emergency worker. He was more like a father figure who really seemed to understand what she’d been through. Coming over to Cheryl, he held her for a moment.
And Cheryl wasn’t the only one struggling with emotions. Appalled at her fragility, Mitch gripped her in a bear hug, obviously stunned that the brittle, confident woman he had sent out on the easiest job had suffered so much, that the proud, good-looking New Yorker he had waved off was like a fragile child in his arms, an angry scar over her cheek and a flood of pain in her heart.
“I’m sorry about the Jeep, sorry that I wasn’t there to help when the storm hit….�
��
“We managed,” Mitch said gruffly, “and I don’t want to hear another damn word about the Jeep. It’s a hunk of metal, Cheryl. Don’t give it another thought. You’re safe.” His voice was thick. “I tried to tell you to get off the bridge, Cheryl. I was screaming into my phone for you to back off, but there was so much static on the line that I knew you couldn’t hear me. Then all of a sudden the line cleared, and all I could hear was you screaming. I thought we’d lost you, Cheryl. I thought for sure you’d drowned. I radioed through for a vehicle to head straight down there, and when they radioed back and said the bridge was down…”
“I can come back and work,” Cheryl offered, but Mitch immediately shook his head.
“You’re in no fit state to work. You’re on the first flight out of here.”
As if in response, she gave a moist cough and struggled to catch her breath. Mitch eyed her in concern, and suddenly home sounded good to Cheryl; the cool, white emptiness of her apartment, the order of the life she had created for herself in Courage Bay.
Mitch was right; home was where she needed to be.
And yet…
Forcibly she pushed her misgivings aside as Beth was stretchered across the grass by an efficient emergency retrieval team. Cheryl knew then that her time was up, and she sought out Noah, scarcely able to believe he hadn’t come out to say goodbye. Mitch would be too busy to linger once Beth and Paul were safely boarded onto the helicopter.
“I don’t know how to thank you,” Beth said as Cheryl approached the stretcher and gave Beth’s good hand a squeeze, “and how sorry I am for what happened.”
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