by MF Isaacs
Now that I have spent a weekend at Western State with Sierra, and Hannah too, I have started to rethink my life. I’ve been taking online classes, working towards a degree I don’t really need. Now I am thinking maybe I take a year off work and go to Western State to complete my degree rather than doing it online. If I was there in person, I could try a real relationship with Sierra while also getting to be near Hannah.
Dad has always said he knew right away that Mom was the one. It is hard to hear their story and the tragedy of how their lives came together. Despite the awful events that happened, my dad tells the story of knowing he would do anything to make a life with my mom. I didn’t know Sierra when she lost her parents and sister; or her grandma; or the struggle of taking care of her grandpa only to end up losing him too. If I had known her, I would have done what I could to protect her, to take the burdens from her, to give her something good in all the bad. Sure, when I met her I thought she was hot but now that I have spent time with her and actually talked to her it is different. Now I haven’t stopped thinking about protecting her, or questioning what I can do to reduce her burden, or wondering what I could to do to make her happy in life. Can I make her happy in life?
Starting this weekend, I need to show her she is enough.
I will tell the others traffic was light so I got into town earlier than expected. I will not tell them I was so excited that I left two hours earlier than I needed to. Once I got into town I couldn’t help but wish Sierra was already here. I got us all checked into our rooms. I don’t know, nor do I care, what Sierra and her brothers’ financial situation is, but given the fact that they are all students I have no problem paying for our rooms. Once I dropped my stuff in my room, I sent the group text messages letting them know I had already arrived. Sierra was the only one to respond.
Sierra: I think we are only about halfway. Looks like you have some time to yourself. What are you gonna do?
Me: Sit here and wish you were already here. But since you aren’t here yet, I will probably go check out the town. Need anything while I am out and about?
Sierra: Sweet of you to ask but I think I am good. I am sure we will have time this weekend for shopping.
Me: I am sure we will. What will you look for? Do you have something that you buy in every place you visit or do you collect things? My mom collects wine glasses and coffee mugs.
Sierra: I don’t intentionally collect anything. Maybe someday I’ll find something I like enough to collect. When traveling I usually get a tacky t-shirt to sleep in because I always forget to pack pajamas.
Me: Well while I am out exploring if I see a tacky t-shirt I’ll get it for you. See you soon Babe.
Sierra: Have fun. We’ll be there soon.
Instead of looking for a tacky t-shirt I wanted to give her one of mine or maybe buy her sexy lingerie that she could sleep in. I think lingerie would look desperate and I don’t want her to think I am only after sex. But damn, the thought of getting her naked makes my dick hard as hell.
It only took me a half hour at the mall to find the tackiest t-shirt I could find. I found the one where it looks like a huge hairy beer belly and the matching one of the hot girl in a bikini. I got her the guy one and the girl one for me. I stopped in a couple other shops looking for pajamas. I didn’t want to get her lingerie, but something similar to the sleep shorts and tank she wore last weekend would be okay. I found what I was looking for in Victoria Secret. It sucked really fucking bad shopping in there; everything I saw I wanted to buy for Sierra. Instead, I only got the pajamas and a lotion sample pack that the sales lady recommended. It must have been a slow shopping day because the sales lady offered to wrap everything for me.
As I was walking out of the Victoria Secret I finally heard from Hannah letting me know they were about an hour out. I started to make my way down the mall towards the exit where I parked by when the jewelry store caught my eye. I know I was acting like a total pussy but I didn’t know anyone here so I didn’t care. I looked at the window displays and wondered what kind of jewelry Sierra liked. I’ve drank plenty, even experimented with some recreational drugs, but I have never felt so physically out of my body before. I seriously had no control over my body. The only thing that snapped me back into the presence was the sales lady asking if she could help me find anything. When I responded, it was as if my whole being knew why I was there. “I’d like to look at some engagement rings. I am not ready to buy one but I want to know what I am looking at.” Thankfully she wasn’t pushy, one sales person to the next, she was extremely helpful as she educated me on the different types of stones, shapes, ratings, size and expected cost. By the time I left there, I had given her my business card and told her if she ever considered moving north she could work at any one of the dealerships. Natalie was her name and she gave me her card as well and told me to call if I had any questions when the time came.
I met the group at the stadium parking lot where Alfred and Norma were parking for the night. Everyone piled into the Expedition that I borrowed for the weekend. I handed out room keys and they dropped all their stuff before heading out to explore the town. The weather was great so we decided to walk around. I wanted desperately to reach out and touch Sierra but she was shy and it was turning me on. We were total tourists, stopping to take pictures. At one point Sierra asked if she could take a picture of Hannah and I together. Then she quietly asked Hannah to take a picture of her and I together. When she switched places with Hannah I couldn’t help but lean in closely while also pulling her into my body for the picture. When she tried to pull away after the picture I squeezed her hip where I had rested my hand during the picture. The pressure got her to look up at me and making eye contact caused the world around us to stop moving. If we had been alone, I would have pulled her into my body and kissed her like my life depended on it. Instead, since we weren’t alone, I smiled and offered her a wink. After that, Sierra warmed up to me a little and her shyness wore off.
By the time we got back from dinner, I wanted to ask her to spend some time with me but I still wasn’t sure how Steve and Curtis were going to respond. Thankfully it was taken out of my control. Curtis took off as soon as we hit the hotel lobby. Then Steve asked Hannah if she would go for a walk with him; when she agreed, he asked me to walk Sierra back to her room.
Instead of heading to the room she is sharing with Hannah I told her I had something for her in my room. Hotel rooms are always awkward because the seating areas are uncomfortable and the only other place to sit is the bed. I told her to have a seat while I pulled the presents out of the bags. When I turned around she had taken her shoes and jacket off before climbing onto the king size bed. She was always beautiful in my opinion, but at this relaxed moment she was more beautiful than anything I had ever seen. I had to tell her, she had to know, “Babe you look absolutely beautiful, you take my breath away. On a different note, I got you a couple of things while shopping today. You want to open them?”
My words definitely surprised her, I’m not sure if it was calling her beautiful or if it was because I got her a present. “Seriously? You got me a present?” I slid the first bag with the tacky t-shirts towards her.
“Oh wait, part of that is for me. You can open it but only one is for you. Sounds bad, but just open it and you will see.” She pulled the man shirt out first and started laughing. She tipped the bag further and saw the bikini girl which I quickly pointed out, “That one is mine.”
Still laughing she caught her breath before thanking me, “I can’t believe you got me a tacky t-shirt. Not only that but you got yourself one too. Are you going to wear yours? Do you sleep in a t-shirt?”
“Um, no I don’t sleep in a t-shirt but I couldn’t resist getting a tacky shirt that would remind me of you. Okay now the other present. This one wasn’t as easy to pick out.”
Her cheeks turned pink at the sight of the pink and white striped bag. I could see her release the breath she was holding when she saw what was in the package. She gushed, “Oh
Cal, thank you so much. I love them. Did you smell these lotions?” She opened each bottle sniffing them and moaning in appreciation before handing each one over for me to smell too. I didn’t care what they smelled like, the thought of rubbing one all over her body made my dick hard. I know, surprising, right?
“Baby, you are killing me. If you moan like that again I can’t promise to be a gentleman. And if I can’t be a gentleman, I am going to have to take you back to your own room...and I really want to spend more time with you. So please don’t moan like that.” I expected her to turn shy when I mentioned her moaning, instead she just flashed me a smile that caused my already hard dick to drip.
She moved to her knees which allowed her to lean over the open packages and kissed my cheek. She moved back less than an inch before she whispered, “Cal, that is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. I don’t know what to say other than thank you.” I couldn’t stop myself; I reached up with both hands catching her face so I could pull it to mine in a kiss that erased everyone that came before it. The feel of her plump lips against mine made my head spin. I traced her bottom lip with the tip of my tongue in hopes of her tongue meeting mine. Instead of our tongues meeting, she pouted out her bottom lip and I did the only logical thing I could and sucked it into my mouth and stroked it with my tongue. She moaned as I let my tongue caress her lip. I released her long enough to take in several deep breaths then brushed my lips against hers. I could kiss her all night, I would do anything to keep her with me all night. But I don’t think Steve will take to kindly to me keeping her. I let her go before I took it further than she was ready for.
“I want you so bad but I know we aren’t there yet. I want to be there with you so fucking bad Baby. I want to spend all night kissing you but I know I wouldn’t be able to stop. What are you thinking?”
“So many things are racing around in my head. Top of the list, kissing some more. That may not have been my first kiss ever but it certainly made it clear that Logan Ross didn’t know shit.” I couldn’t help but chuckle, especially considering I almost freaked out when she said it wasn’t her first; I forgot about Logan fucking Ross. “Earlier today, before you kissed me, I thought ‘I have never felt like this before’. Earlier today, before you kissed me, I knew I was falling for you. Earlier today, before you kissed me, I wanted you. Now, well now that we have kissed, I want you even more.”
“Fuck you aren’t going to make this easy on me are you? Baby my dick is so fucking hard I will probably have to jack off twice just to get to sleep tonight. There is still so much we need to learn about each other and I don’t mean sexually. I know your history because Steve told me, but you haven’t heard mine. I wish I could tell you that I saved myself sexually, but I can’t. That is something we should probably talk about too. I want to have these conversations with you but I honestly can’t do it tonight. I can’t stop thinking about kissing you all over and touching you and tasting you. Fuck baby, I have to take you back to your room. Are you okay with that? I’m sure Hannah is worried about you.”
“I understand. We can talk more tomorrow. I am not worried about Hannah, I text her when I realized we weren’t headed to my room. She hasn’t responded so I imagine she is fine. You don’t have to walk me back to my room, I imagine it’s uncomfortable walking around like that.” She gestured to my dick which wanted out of my pants so fucking bad. But for the first time in my life I was being a gentleman and ignoring the throbbing need in my pants in-exchange for seeing her safely to her room.
“Uncomfortable or not Baby, I will walk you to your room and make sure you get inside. Now grab your presents and let’s go before I change my mind and say to hell with being a gentleman. My mom would be so proud of me right now.” I couldn’t help laugh at myself.
I kissed her gently on her lips before she used her key card to open the door. “Good night Baby. I’ll see you in the morning. Sleep good.” Then with every ounce of strength I could muster, I walked away.
I love game days. This one is no different, Hannah let me fix her hair and makeup which automatically makes it a good day. I can’t believe how much I love fixing her hair and doing her makeup. The only negative of doing her hair and makeup was being stuck listening to her go on and on about last night. Seriously she let my brother take pictures of her while she was practically stripping. Several notions came to mind as she was talking, this would be so much better if she weren’t talking about my brother on the other hand how cool is it that I love who my brother loves. That being said, the idea that she did all of that when I could have returned to our room at any minute is a little weird.
“It is a little weird thinking about my brother that way, but I know he loves you and I know it isn’t something you would just do with anyone. We have talked about it before and I know we have both been sheltered in the same way. So, despite it being my brother, I want to hear about it because you are experiencing it before me. The more I learn now, the more I will know when it is my turn.” I couldn’t help the pink cheeks which ultimately gave everything away, so I continued on with my confession, “Every time I am around Calvin, my pulse picks up and my hands start to sweat. If he touches me, my panties are instantly wet and my nipples get hard...seriously just walking next to him yesterday, the back of his hand brushed against my hand, boom instantly hard nipples. I don’t know what to do or say.”
She did a crazy girl squeal while hugging me tight. Then went and got all crazy by over sharing about some blog that she has discovered. She, like me, didn’t have anyone teach her about sex. At least I have been reading every fashion magazine I could get my hands on, it started on our summer vacation when I saw a cover advertising “learn your sex signal.” The bonus was that the magazines have also taught me a lot about doing hair and makeup. It is also helpful that neither brother would be caught dead reading one which allowed me to learn that my sex signal was in dire need of strengthening.
Until I heard Norma talking to Hannah in the motor home, I worried that if I took charge of my sexuality it would eventually scare guys away making them think I was a slut for knowing what I want. Being raised the way I was after losing our parents and Sophia, I have wondered about how I am supposed to know what I like sexually. It’s not like I can ask my brothers, ‘Hey how do I learn what I like sexually?’ Until Calvin came into my life, I had thought some guys were attractive but not to the point of thinking about them all the time. Now, when I take the questionnaires in the magazines, I at least can have someone in mind as I answer the questions.
We continued the conversation as I put the finishing touches on my own makeup. Between the little I have learned from the magazines, listening to Norma’s story, and now Hannah’s blog I started to think maybe I could learn enough about sex that I could keep someone like Calvin interested. I guess there is only one way to find out. As the guys came into our room, I couldn’t help but feel giddy when I saw the way Cal looked at me; with just a look my heart stuttered a beat.
I spent the whole day smiling from ear-to-ear. I honestly couldn’t tell you the last time I was this happy. There wasn’t just one thing that made me so happy, it was the combination of the whole day. Curtis meeting a group of like-minded people that he connected with instantly. Watching our team win and being able to celebrate with them; even if Steve and Cal made Hannah and I hang out in the motor-home to avoid further exposure to the players hitting on us. Hanging out with Alfred and Norma; playing inappropriate games with them was so much fun. Watching Calvin act like a kid when he won and Hannah gave him a scratch ticket as a prize was the funniest thing I have seen in ages. Seriously my stomach muscles hurt from all the laughter and I didn’t want the day to end. It made me realize I want my life to be like this, I want the happiness and laughter; I want to be playful and goofy. I haven’t been playful since before Cody took my family away.
Sierra was always beautiful to me, but watching her be happy and smile today has shown me that she is more than just beautiful. I was thankful she and H
annah didn’t put up too much fuss when we sent them to the motor-home. I am not sure what they expected because Steve and I weren’t going to just sit there and watch as the team hit on them and asked them out. It was easier to remove the girls from the situation than it was to deal with that many guys hitting on them. Other than that, just knowing that she was having fun allowed me to relax and enjoy the day; like celebrating my win at Cards Against Humanity. Who doesn’t love getting scratch lotto tickets. It’s like a McMann family tradition, they are considered the ultimate prize.
Steve and I let the girls walk a few feet ahead of us until the drunks stumbled out of the bar and started being disrespectful towards them. Steve quickly took Hannah by the hand and I put my arm around Sierra and pulled her into me. At first contact, she jumped in response to my touch and her body didn’t relax until I whispered, “I got you Sierra, please let me.” She tilted her face just enough to see me through her thick eye lashes and when she saw me looking back at her she relaxed in my hold. That was the greatest feeling in the world, okay maybe not the world but it was the greatest feeling I had had so far that day. Knowing that she was letting me protect her meant everything to me.
When we approached the hotel, it dawned on me that Steve and I were in a funny spot. I knew he wanted to take my sister back to his room just like I wanted to take his sister to mine. Slowing my steps as much as possible I decided to wait him out. It didn’t take long before he invited my sister to his room to watch a movie and made sure I would see Sierra to her room safely. The older, protective brother in me couldn’t let Hannah walk away without saying something to her. But the reality is, Steve is exactly who I would choose for her if I had too. I pulled her into a hug and whispered, “You will always be my little sister and my first instinct is to protect you, but I know that man loves you more than anything in the world. Hold onto him, he will take care of you and protect you in ways you have never experienced. Love you Sis.” She didn’t let go of the hug like I expected her to, instead she gave me her own warning about Sierra. I acknowledged for the first time that Sierra was special, that alone gave Hannah all she needed to know. She wished Sierra good night before taking off towards the elevators with Steve.