by Ellle Parker
I took a sip of beer and said, “We need to stop at a drugstore and pick up some sleeping pills, and then run by a drive-thru for a hamburger.”
Seth’s gaze darted toward the corner. “You’re gonna drug the guy? What do we care?”
“We don’t care,” I said, frowning at him. “This is for the dog at A-1 Auto. Even if he’s not the type to take a chunk out of my ass, I don’t want his barking to wake up the neighbors.”
“Yeah, good luck with that,” Seth said. “Every dog I’ve ever met would hork down the burger like it’s starving and then spit the pill on the ground. I have no idea how they do it.”
“Well, shit. Got a better idea?”
“Booze. Knocks them right out if you can get them to drink enough. They seem to really like the fruity stuff like strawberry flavored rum or lime vodka.”
I tilted my head and eyed him. “And you know this how?”
“Ed’s dogs,” he said with a smirk. “They come sniffing around when I have parties out back sometimes and get into people’s drinks. It’s never Cuervo or Jack Daniel’s they go for, it’s always the sweet stuff.”
“And you let them.”
“Well, no, of course not. I wouldn’t waste good booze on the mutts. They wait until no one’s looking.”
“Okay,” I said. “We skip the drugstore and hit a liquor store, instead.”
We paused as the waiter brought our meals and set them down in front of us, the plates steaming enticingly. I leaned forward and inhaled deeply, humming with anticipation. Seth looked pleased with my reaction.
“Actually,” he said, “we’re not that far from The Shark Pond. We can get a burger from the diner across the street, and then stop in there and get a couple shots to pour on it. It’ll save time.”
“Uh-huh.”
“What? It’s not like we have all night.”
“Well, yes, we do have all night. I think you just want to see that bartender again.”
“He’s just eye candy,” he said with a grin. “Eat your damn dinner.”
We agreed not to ruin an excellent meal with talk about McCann and his shitty job. Instead, we spent the time talking about cars, us, football and beer. We didn’t rush either, enjoying our meal to the fullest and even going so far as to order a dessert of papaya topped with cream cheese. We also had Cuban coffee, which was about all I needed to die happy. It occurred to me that might be a distinct possibility, but I pushed the thought out of my head and had a second cup. If it weren’t for the nasty situation we were in, it would have been a decent dinner date.
Seth must have read my face, because he grinned and said, “I want to do this again when we don’t have thugs and drug dealers snapping at our heels.”
“Yeah, me too.”
Eventually, there were only a few tables left with people at them, and the staff was reaching that state of tired politeness that screamed “Get Out,” so Seth paid the bill and we left.
We crossed the street to the all-night diner. The crowd there was livelier, being mostly twenty-somethings starting a night of club hopping. Raucous laughter came from several different tables. There were two free stools at the counter, so we sat down.
A blond waitress came over, my age or a little younger, cute in a bookish sort of way. She had glasses and a short haircut, and looked more like she belonged in Minnesota than Miami. When she greeted us, she sounded like maybe she was from Minnesota.
“Hi, there,” she said. “Are you having a nice evening? Can I get you a couple of menus?”
“No, thanks,” I told her. “We just need a hamburger to go.”
“Just one?” she asked, looking between the two of us.
“It’s a treat for my dog.”
“Lucky dog!” she said. “You know what the dog said when its tail got run over by a lawn mower, don’t you?”
“Ah, no?”
“Won’t be long now!”
Seth groaned, but I gave her a smile. “Do you have one of those big Styrofoam boxes you could put it in?”
“Yeah, sure,” she said, and hustled off to put in the order.
A couple of obviously drunk young men came in and sat down next to Seth, giggling and clutching at each other. The waitress came over and watched them with amusement.
“Nice night for barhopping,” she said. “Did you hear about the two peanuts that walked into a bar?”
They gaped at her curiously, and Seth buried his face in his hands.
“One of them was a salted!”
The two drunk guys busted up laughing and seemed to think that was the funniest thing they’d ever heard.
While she was handing out menus and working her way down the counter with a coffee pot, Seth leaned close and said, “Is she for real? What the fuck?”
“Come on,” I said. “I think it’s kind of cute.”
“Yeah, but you don’t date, you wouldn’t know.”
“I think you’re cute sometimes.”
Down at the end of the counter, she rang up someone’s bill and said, “Do you know how you stop an elephant from charging? Take away his credit card!”
“For fuck’s sake,” Seth muttered. “Just shoot me now.”
“Be nice.” I jabbed him with my elbow. “She’s packing up our burger.”
She carried over the box and set it on the counter in front of me. “I have a friend who’s a vegetarian, but I say if we’re not supposed to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?”
Seth winced and rolled his eyes. “Oh my God,” he muttered.
She turned and fixed him with a rather piercing gaze, and I thought I could detect a wicked gleam in her eye.
“Hey,” she said, nodding at him, “how does a farmer find a sheep in the tall grass?”
Seth merely raised an eyebrow at her.
She smirked. “Very satisfying.”
The stunned look on Seth’s face was priceless. He stared open mouthed for a minute and then said, “Come again?”
“Only if the sheep is very docile,” she shot back.
I laughed out loud and put a ten dollar bill on the counter. “Keep the change, and thank you very much.”
“You betcha,” she said with a wink.
Seth was still staring at her in shock, so I grabbed the box and dragged him out of the diner.
Out on the sidewalk, he finally found his tongue. “Dude. Did your cute little waitress just jump straight from kindergarten stuff to sheep fucking jokes?”
“Yes, she did,” I said. “You should have seen your face. She got your number, all right.”
“Wow. That is…that is actually kind of hot.”
“See? I would know.”
We figured we were about six blocks away from The Shark Pond, and it would be easier to just walk than to try to move the car. It was a nice night, which I was extremely thankful for, and the fresh air would do us both some good. The general atmosphere was wilder than it had been the last time.
This time, we didn’t bother hanging around outside the club, but went right in. The club was much busier and louder, and it took some work to make our way to the bar. We had to hang out for a few minutes before a spot opened up and we could squeeze in.
En was working again, pouring drinks with both hands, and Seth gave him a wave. He smiled brightly and flipped a bottle in the air before putting it away. When he finished the round he was serving, he wiped his hands on his jeans and came down to where we stood.
“Well, well, look who’s back,” he said, leaning on the bar. “Just couldn’t get enough, I guess?”
“Something like that,” Seth said, grinning slyly.
“Too bad I already had my break. What can I get you guys tonight?” He was a bit less gregarious this time, and I imagined that had a lot to do with the crowd and how busy he was. No time for screwing around.
“I’ll take an amaretto on the rocks,” I said.
“Red Bull.”
En looked at Seth. “Red Bull and…”
“Just the Red
Bull. I’m driving tonight.”
“Good looking and responsible…nice.”
Seth shrugged and gave a humble little nod I knew was pure bullshit. He’s never had a humble moment in his life. He leaned in and said, “We do need about five shots of lime vodka for the hamburger, though.”
That gave En some pause and he narrowed his eyes at both of us. I lifted the lid of the Styrofoam box slightly so he could see inside.
“I get it,” he said. “You skipped the drinking and went straight for the drugs.”
Seth smirked. “No, seriously. I have this buddy who’s always pulling shit on me—pranks and stuff—and I need to get even. He’s been watching his girlfriend’s dog, and she’s due back tomorrow morning, so I want to get the dog drunk as shit and leave him holding the bag.”
“That is so fucked up,” En said with a big grin. “You are an evil little bastard.”
He put a can of Red Bull up on the bar for Seth and went to fix my drink. When he came back, he had a glass for me and a bottle of Smirnoff lime vodka.
“Here, give me that,” he said reaching for the box. He looked at me. “I gotta’ say, you don’t really look the type for shit like this.”
I shook my head. “No, no, this is not my show. I just came out for some dinner. I’m going home and heading to bed like normal people do.”
They both laughed at me. En opened the box and grabbed a long bar straw, which he used to poke about fifteen holes straight through the hamburger. He tossed that and picked up the bottle, pouring vodka slowly over the top to let it soak in. I was impressed with the effort he was putting into it. When he was done, the whole thing was a glistening, soggy mess sitting in a quarter-inch deep clear puddle. Carrying that back to the car was going to be a treat.
I took a drink of my amaretto and said, “You’re a real professional, that’s a hell of a job.”
En nodded. “Damn straight. I don’t do anything half-assed.”
He took the bottle down to the other end of the bar and put it back up on the lighted platform with the rest of them. I closed the hamburger box and took another sip of my drink, when something caught my eye.
The club manager had cornered En and was talking to him. That in itself wouldn’t be unusual, but what made me notice was he was pointing at us, and it was clear we were the topic of conversation.
“Oh, I do not like this,” I said, poking Seth with my foot.
He raised his eyebrows in question, and I cut a glance to where En was.
He looked at me and mused, “I don’t know. The guy probably saw the stunt with the burger and wanted to know what the hell was up. They’re probably talking about what to charge us for it.”
“I hope you’re right. We could have raised a few suspicions asking about Serrano the other day. En may not have known he was dead yet, but I’m willing to bet the manager did.”
“Shit. I wish I’d thought to tell him to keep that to himself.”
I shrugged. “No real way to do that without making him suspicious too. Don’t worry about it. Let’s get the hell out of here as quick as we can, though.”
“Anytime, man. I can take this with me.”
I waited until En worked his way back to us and said, “What do we owe you?”
“Twenty bucks ought to cover it,” he said. I gave him twenty-five.
He gave Seth a steamy look and said, “Next time you come around here, be early.”
Seth smirked. “Will do. You can count on that.”
“Good luck with your dog intoxication. Hope that works out for you.”
“Thanks, I could use it.”
Chapter 27
Back at the car, I let Seth have the keys, mainly because I didn’t trust him to transport the swimming hamburger without spilling vodka all over my seats. Thankfully, it wasn’t that far a drive to the mini-storage unit, and we were there in less than fifteen minutes.
We let ourselves in with the key card and drove quietly around to number twenty-seven, where Serrano had his car stashed. I jumped out and unlocked the garage door, pushing it halfway up. Seth parked so Matilda’s trunk was right by the door. That way we could load what we’d need into the Z4 without calling a lot of attention to ourselves.
Seth shut the car off and came around back. “I’ll go open up the Z-four,” he said.
“Why don’t you put the top up too, I don’t want to be that visible tonight.”
“I’m on it,” he said, and ducked under the garage door.
In the trunk of my car, I put together what I thought we would need with us. I had a duffel bag to carry the boxes, the set of lock picks from my surveillance kit, flashlights, and the stun gun. I also added the pry bar and an extra clip of ammo for my gun. The gun itself, I checked over and slipped into its holster, nestled at the small of my back.
“You almost ready?” Seth asked, sticking his head out the door.
“Yeah.” I handed him the empty duffle and the tool kit.
He disappeared with those while I opened my briefcase and got the maps to the salvage yards and our notes with the box combinations. Serrano’s package was in there, with the notebook, and I grabbed it, figuring I’d give it back to McCann. None of us wanted any loose ends floating around.
I tapped on the door and Seth peered out at me. “Here,” I said, giving him the envelope with the notebook in it, “stick that in the empty bag.”
“Right. Is that everything?”
“I think so. You ready in there?”
“Dude, you have no idea.” His eyes gleamed wildly.
I pointed at him. “No fucking around tonight, this is damn serious. We can not get pulled over for any reason, you got it?”
“You don’t need to tell me that,” he said with a hint of exasperation.
“Yeah, I think do, Seth. You look about this close to goin’ right over the edge on me.”
“I’m fine, I swear it.”
“All right.”
“Nag, nag, nag.” He stood up and pushed the door open the rest of the way so we could switch cars.
“Yeah, bite me.”
I held out my hands, and Seth tossed me my car keys. He flashed me a big grin as I threw him the keys for the Z4. I shut the trunk and went around to get in the driver’s seat, starting her up.
I watched in the rearview mirror, and after the Z4 backed slowly into sight, I jockeyed Matilda around until I could back her into the space. That way, when we were done, we could pull straight out and get the hell out of there.
I shut off the engine and gave her a pat on the fender. “Wish me luck, baby. I’ll be back soon,” I muttered.
Outside, I pulled the door down and snapped the padlock in place. Seth eased forward in the Z4 and I got in, setting the hamburger box on the floor between my feet. He had the radio tuned to something obnoxious, and after a couple seconds, I realized my seat was heated. Like a little kid, he’d already been messing with the levers and buttons.
“Is this thing sweet or what?” he said, practically purring with lust. “I can’t wait to get on the road with it.”
“Well, now’s the time,” I said. “Just keep it cool until we’re away from here.”
“I said I’d be good, and I meant it. I’ll even wait until we’re on the freeway to really open her up.”
“Within reason.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah.”
He drove slowly up to the gate, which rolled open automatically from the inside when a car set off its motion sensor. True to his word, Seth kept it barely over the speed limit through the frontage roads and side streets. When we reached the entrance ramp to the freeway, however, he hit the gas and the Z4 surged forward like a cat. Seth merged effortlessly into traffic and wove in and out, playing with the easy maneuverability of the car. It was the ideal place to let him have fun with it, because at that hour, there were plenty of flashy hot rods zipping around like it was a playground.
“Oh baby,” Seth moaned, eyes on the road, one hand on the wheel, and the other on th
e stick shift. I was willing to bet he’d totally forgotten I was there.
I took a penlight out of my pocket and checked the map. “You’ve got a nice long stretch on here before you have to worry about any changes. Knock yourself out.”
By way of an answer, he cut across two lanes of traffic and sailed past a Maserati before darting back into the center lane.
I settled down into my seat and said, “On the other hand, please keep in mind that this is quite possibly a stolen car.”
“I’m keeping an eye out,” Seth said.
He was clearly not the least bit worried, and I didn’t have the heart to spoil his fun when there was such a good chance it was the last he was going to have for a while. Besides, it appeared he had a pretty good knack for being only the second fastest car on the road at any given time, so if a cop did show up, he’d have bigger fish to fry.
Chapter 28
We headed for A-1 Salvage first. It was the farthest north and easy to get to by freeway. Plus, it had the dog, and I really wanted to get rid of the booze-soaked hamburger. The combination of alcohol and tepid beef is a disgusting smell, and the inside of a Z4 is damn small. I kept tabs on the road signs and let Seth know when we were getting close to our exit.
When I did, he veered across traffic and up the ramp with a squeal of tires. “Hey,” I said, “you wanna take it easy?”
“I deserved one last hurrah. From here on out it’s got to be granny driving all the way.” He coasted up to the intersection and stopped neatly.
“It’s got to be inconspicuous driving,” I said. “You go too slow and you’ll draw just as much attention as if you were speeding.”
He gave me an irritated look. “I know, Dino. I wasn’t born yesterday. Will you give me a little credit here?”
“Sorry. This is not my idea of a good job. There’s no way I can lie my way out of this or pull one over on someone. We get caught, and that’s it.”
“We won’t get caught,” he said.
To prove his worth, he drove perfectly the rest of the way. When we reached the lot, he drove down to the end of the street, turned around, and shut the lights off. Moving at a slow creep, he inched quietly back along the far side of the road until we were just past the salvage yard, pointed in the right direction for a fast getaway. A couple of large palms drooped heavily, swaying in the light breeze. Seth pulled over beneath them and shut the car off.