‘Nonsense! Who’s to say you won’t go back into singing and acting later on? Maybe when William’s at school.’
‘William’s my priority now,’ Mia said.
‘Of course,’ Shelley said, ‘but you’ve got to have some Mia time too.’
Mia thought about it for a moment. For the last few years, she’d put herself on hold and had been quite happy to do it, but maybe—just maybe—Shelley was right, and Mia could allow a little bit of the old Mia to resurface again one day.
As she was beginning to daydream about William cheering her on from the front row of a West End theater, Dame Pamela Harcourt entered the room. She was wearing a fabulous chiffon dress in the prettiest cherry-blossom pink. Around her neck she wore three rows of delicate pearls, and there were what looked like mini diamond chandeliers dangling from her ears. Her hair, which was the color of the moon, was swept up in an elegant chignon, and a diamond clasp sparkled from within its wispy depths.
A huge round of applause greeted her, and Mia wondered what it would be like to live her life surrounded by such public adoration. As soon as the thought crossed her mind, she realized that Shelley might be right, and that she could one day tread the boards herself once again.
Dame Pamela began by talking about her lifelong love of Jane Austen. ‘Jane Austen has done wonders for my career,’ she said with a smile. ‘She might have written only six books, but I’ve been lucky enough to star in most of them.’
She started the readings with an extract from Northanger Abbey, celebrating Catherine Morland’s first ball, and many a knowing glance was exchanged when Dame Pamela read the lines, ‘Dress was her passion. She had a most harmless delight in being fine.’
She then read a scene from Persuasion, the comic scene where Sir Walter is complaining about Bath. ‘The worst of Bath was the number of its plain women. He did not mean to say that there were no pretty women, but the number of plain was out of all proportion. He had frequently observed, as he walked, that one handsome face would be followed by thirty, or five and thirty frights.’
She finished by reading the scene from Pride and Prejudice where Lady Catherine visits Longbourn to confront Elizabeth Bennet about a ‘report of a most alarming nature.’ It was wonderful, as if Lady Catherine de Bourgh and Elizabeth Bennet were in the room with the audience, and nobody wanted it to end. There was many a call of ‘encore’ when the reading came to an end.
Questions followed. What was Dame Pamela’s favorite Austen role? Answer: Marianne Dashwood, because she was so passionate. Would she have chosen Willoughby or Colonel Brandon? Both, she said, which caused much laughter among the people in the audience.
‘Are you going to ask a question?’ Shelley whispered to Mia.
‘No, I’m too nervous.’
‘I think I’m going to.’
‘Any more questions?’ the organizer asked the audience.
Shelley stuck her hand in the air, feeling like an anxious schoolgirl.
‘Yes, the lady in the yellow muslin gown.’
‘Dame Pamela, my friend here is a budding singer and actress, and I’d love to know if you have any advice.’
Mia felt herself blush to the very depths of her being as she felt the gaze of Dame Pamela fix itself upon her.
‘I am often asked for my advice, and here it is,’ she said. ‘Never give up. If you have a dream—no matter what that dream is, whether it be to become a great actress or to open your very own sweet shop—never stop dreaming it, because if you do, life becomes one long nightmare.’
Mia and Shelley sat riveted by her words, and then the applause began as Dame Pamela left the stage in a cloud of pink chiffon, her floral perfume scenting the air behind her.
‘Wow!’ Shelley said. ‘There’s a part of me that wants to run after her, so I can listen to her forever. Wasn’t she amazing?’
‘Why did you ask that question?’
‘Because I don’t think you should give up on yourself so easily, Mia. I know you’re a mother now, but you’re also a human being in your own right, and I so want to see that old Mia back again. She was fabulous, and I have a feeling there’s a little part of you that would like to see her back again too. I’m right, aren’t I?’
Mia looked into the smiling face of her friend and realized that she was smiling too. ‘You might be,’ she said.
Later that evening, in the privacy of her room, Mia rang Alec’s number. It rang several times before going to voice mail, and Mia left a message for him to call her back. As she was getting into her bed, her phone rang.
‘Mia?’ It was Alec. ‘How great to hear from you, although, I have to say, I didn’t expect to hear from you again.’
‘I need to see you. Are you still in Bath?’
‘No, but I can get there pretty quickly, if you need me to.’
‘I need you to.’
‘Then I’m there.’
‘Eleven o’clock tomorrow.’ Mia gave him directions to a little café that was easy to find, he confirmed that he’d be there, and she hung up. He probably thought that she had forgiven him and wanted to make a go of things together, but that couldn’t have been further from the truth.
Chapter 42
I can’t believe I’m an auntie,’ Sarah said as she walked out of a talk about gambling in Regency times.
‘That must have come as a surprise,’ Lloyd said.
‘It did,’ Sarah said.
‘You had no idea?’
‘No,’ Sarah said, her expression pained. ‘It’s awful. I’ve missed so much time, not only with William, but also with my sister, and I’m so angry at myself.’
‘You can make it all up now, can’t you?’
‘I just wish I hadn’t missed it all, and I can’t believe I didn’t see all this in Devon.’ They reached Queen Square and walked along one of the paths to a bench and sat down. It was a favorite spot of Sarah’s, because in whichever direction she looked, Georgian architecture greeted her. Three hundred and sixty degrees of beauty. It was like stepping back into the Bath Jane Austen would have known.
‘I still don’t understand. How could Alec have made love to my sister and still be making a move on me?’ she said. ‘How can men do that?’
Lloyd cleared his throat. ‘Not every man would pull a stunt like that,’ he said.
Sarah looked at him. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound like I was accusing you.’
‘Well, I’ve not met your sister, but I can promise you this right now: I will not fall in love with her.’
Sarah smiled. ‘What makes you so sure of that?’
Lloyd’s eyebrows rose over his dark eyes, and he smiled back at her. ‘Because I’m falling in love with you.’
Sarah’s eyes widened at his declaration. ‘But we’ve only just met.’
‘Doesn’t matter,’ he said. ‘Haven’t you heard of love at first sight? As soon as I saw you, I knew you were the one for me.’
Sarah laughed. ‘That sort of thing happens only in books and films.’
‘Really? Are you sure? Are you absolutely sure that it can’t happen in real life too? Because I’m pretty certain I am in love with you.’
Sarah stared at him. He certainly did look sincere, and hadn’t she wanted to kiss him the previous night?
‘Lloyd, I don’t know what to say. You’ve been wonderful to me, and I’ve enjoyed your company.’
‘I can hear a “but” approaching, can’t I?’
Sarah sighed. ‘I’m not sure I have it in me to fall in love again—not after Alec.’
Lloyd frowned. ‘You really think that? Are you going to let that one bad experience blight the rest of your life? Because that’s a rotten way to live.’
‘I can’t help it. It’s just the way I feel.’
‘Then you’re letting Alec win. You’re handing your life over to a man who doesn’t deserve it,’ Lloyd said. ‘Are you sure you want to do that? And are you absolutely sure you don’t want to be kissed by the man sitting next to you on th
is bench?’
‘You want to kiss me?’
‘I wanted to kiss you last night.’
‘You did?’ Sarah said. ‘Why didn’t you?’
‘I didn’t think it was the right moment; you know, after everything that had happened that day.’
Sarah nodded. ‘And is it right now?’
‘You need to tell me,’ he said, ‘because I’m not sure I’d want to waste a kiss on somebody who didn’t want to return it.’
‘But I do.’
Lloyd looked surprised. ‘But you said—’
‘I know,’ Sarah said. ‘I’m confused. My head is telling me one thing, and my heart is telling me another.’
‘And you’re the sister who’s usually ruled by the head, aren’t you?’
She nodded. ‘The last time I followed my heart, it nearly got broken.’
‘That was last time,’ Lloyd said, ‘not this time.’ He edged closer to her on the bench and picked her hands up in his. ‘What’s your heart telling you now?’ he asked.
She looked into his dark eyes. What was her heart telling her? It was telling her to kiss him. What was her head saying? It was saying be careful. And what could you do when your head and your heart were at odds with each other? Sarah thought about the books she had read and her beloved collection of Jane Austen novels. They all had happy endings. All the heroes and heroines met their perfect match, even if their journeys toward each other had been fraught with pain and misunderstandings. That was fiction, though. It didn’t necessarily follow that Sarah was going to find such a happy ending, did it? What if she was destined to have her heart broken over and over again?
She looked at Lloyd. He didn’t look like the heartbreaker type, and as he smiled at her, something deep inside her made her realize that she didn’t want to shut herself off from love, and she didn’t want to deny herself the chance for a happy ending.
‘My heart is telling me…’ she paused.
‘What?’ Lloyd asked.
‘That I still believe in happy endings.’ Sarah smiled and, despite the tourists strolling by, she leaned forward and kissed him.
***
Mia wasn’t thinking about kisses, although kisses had got her into this situation in the first place. She looked in the mirror for the umpteenth time. She knew that she was no longer the bright-eyed girl that had fallen in love with Alec, and she was glad of that, but she did rather wish she didn’t look quite so old.
‘Do I look okay?’ Mia asked Shelley, who walked into the bedroom.
‘You look marvelous,’ Shelley said, leaning forward to kiss her cheek. Bingley, who had sneaked up the stairs when nobody was looking, tried to get in on the action too and stuffed a nose into Mia’s crotch.
‘You really must teach this dog some manners, Shelley,’ Mia said as she pushed Bingley’s head away with a giggle.
‘Right,’ Shelley said. ‘That would be like teaching Mr Collins to become interesting.’
There was a blast of a car horn.
‘That’ll be the taxi,’ Mia said, looking at her watch before running down the stairs.
Shelley and Bingley followed, the former almost tripping over the latter.
‘Remember,’ Shelley shouted after her, ‘no slapping!’
Mia tutted. ‘I’m not going to slap anyone,’ she said, ‘unless they really deserve it.’
‘Oh, dear,’ Shelley said. ‘I wouldn’t want to be Alec, then.’
Mia left the house, got into the taxi, and waved good-bye to Shelley. She suddenly felt very alone and half wished that she’d asked Shelley to come with her, but she knew she had to do this alone.
When the taxi dropped her as close to the café as he could get, Mia felt a whole meadowful of butterflies fluttering in her stomach. What was she going to say? How on earth did you tell a man that he has a two-year-old son? Maybe he would slap her for not having told him, or maybe he’d demand to marry her. She shook her head. She couldn’t imagine Alec would have marriage on his mind again.
What if he didn’t turn up at all? No, that wasn’t likely to happen, not if he thought she wanted a reconciliation, which was how she had left things the night before.
Turning off a busy street, she saw the café and made her way toward it. Already it was full of tourists, and the constant chatter was comforting to Mia and might very well disguise any shouting that might occur in the next few moments.
She was still wondering if the whole thing was a good idea, when Alec walked into the café. There was no escaping him; he spotted her straightaway.
‘It’s good to see you,’ he said as he sat down at the table opposite her. ‘I was hoping you’d change your mind, because there’s something I want to—’
‘Alec,’ she said, interrupting him. ‘You mustn’t try to guess why I wanted to see you, because you won’t.’
‘You’ve obviously changed your mind from the other day,’ he said, reaching across the table to take her hand.
She flinched away from him. ‘I haven’t changed my mind.’
‘Then why are you here?’ he asked, a smug smile lifting the corners of his mouth.
‘Because I’ve been persuaded by other people that it’s the right thing to do.’
He frowned. ‘What do you mean?’
Mia took a deep breath. ‘You have a son,’ she said, letting the words hang in the air between them for a moment.
‘What?’
‘After I got home from Devon, I realized I was pregnant, and I had a baby. A little boy.’
‘Are you sure it’s mine?’
Mia blanched at his words, even though she’d expected them. ‘Of course I’m sure he’s yours. I didn’t meet any other Willoughbys whilst on holiday.’
‘What?’
‘Never mind,’ she said, not bothering to explain the literary allusion. ‘Do you want to see a picture of him?’
Alec looked blankly at her. ‘I wasn’t expecting this.’
‘No,’ she said. ‘I guess not.’
Mia opened her handbag and took out the photo to show Alec. ‘He’s called William, and he’s two years old. I won’t stop you from seeing him, if that’s what you decide you want, but he’s my son, and you have to know that there’s nothing more important in the world to me now.’
Alec took a moment to study the photograph. ‘He’s the spitting image of my dad at that age.’
‘Is he?’ For a moment, Mia thought she saw a softening in Alec’s eyes, but he then returned the photograph to her.
‘You don’t need to worry about me breaking up a happy home,’ he said.
‘What do you mean?’
‘As you said, he’s your son.’
‘You don’t want to see him?’
Alec shook his head.
‘I don’t believe it,’ Mia said.
‘Come on. Be fair now. I didn’t come here for this. I’m not a family man, Mia.’
‘Then why did you get married?’
He shook his head. ‘Getting married was a mistake. How many times do I have to tell you that?’
‘Then we have nothing else to say,’ she said, standing up so quickly that her chair fell over behind her.
Alec leapt up and picked it up. ‘Mia,’ he said, ‘don’t leave like this. We can work through things.’
‘What do you mean? You don’t want to see your own son!’
‘But I still want to see you.’
‘What?’
He smiled at her, and for a moment, she thought she was going to slap him again, but the moment soon passed.
‘I guess that’s it, then,’ Mia said, turning to leave.
‘Don’t go!’ Alec said, making a grab for her arm. She dodged out of the way and glared at him.
‘I’m not laying any blame at your doorstep, Alec, and I can’t say I’m surprised by your response, but I want you to know that if you ever change your mind, if you want to see William, then I shan’t prevent you.’
‘It’s you I want to see.’
�
�Well, it’s like this now: I’m a package deal with my son.’ She turned to leave.
‘Mia!’ Alec called after her. She hoped that he wasn’t going to chase her through the streets of Bath again and was thankful when he didn’t bother. He was probably thanking his lucky stars that she wasn’t demanding more of him in his role as father.
‘We’ve both had a lucky escape,’ she said to herself. It was the most unromantic of endings between two people that she could think of, but she also knew that it was the right one.
Chapter 43
Shelley was trying to find Mia among the back streets of Bath. She had a pretty good idea of where the café was, but it was almost impossible to steer a direct route, because Bingley kept stopping and starting, pulling and pushing, and generally causing canine chaos.
‘I shouldn’t have brought you with me, Bingley,’ she said, tugging him away from half a hot dog that had been dropped on the pavement. He looked up at her as if to say that he didn’t ask for much in life.
Shelley paused in a doorway and reached for her phone, but once again, it went to Mia’s voice mail. Shelley sighed. Surely Mia must have said good-bye to Alec by now, unless she’d run away with him. What if she’d had a complete change of heart, had forgiven the rogue, and run away with him?
‘Answer your phone!’ she shouted, causing a pair of shoppers to turn around and glare at her.
It took her only another five minutes to reach the café, and she peered in through the window in the hope of spotting her friend. Bingley peered in too, his wet nose leaving a long slimy streak across the window, much to the joy of a toddler sitting on the other side. Mia was nowhere to be seen. Shelley chewed her lip and decided the best thing she could do would be to walk Bingley around for a bit and keep trying Mia’s phone.
It had been an extraordinary few days since Mia had arrived. The Jane Austen Festival was always an exciting time, but Shelley had never experienced anything quite like this one before. What with long-lost sisters, dramatic reunions in the Pump Room, and secret babies, Shelley’s head was spinning faster than Catherine Morland’s after reading her fill of Gothic novels.
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