by Jo Ann Brown
What if you were? The question bounced through her head, followed by more. If she were Amish, could she be licensed as a foster parent and keep the Henderson kids under her roof? She didn’t know any Amish people who fostered children. Some took in family members or neighbors’ children for days or even years, but being licensed by the state might not be allowed.
She didn’t want to choose between Robert and the children. She wanted all of them in her life, but the truth was, within weeks, each one of them could be gone.
Beth Ann stiffened when she heard someone shout Robert’s name. He turned the buggy toward the curb again, and she realized they were in front of the community center.
Michael Miller ran up to the door. “Robert, I’ve been looking for you. Oh, Beth Ann!”
“I’ve been teaching her to drive the buggy,” Robert said as if it were the most unexpected thing in the world.
“I need to speak with you.” His face was taut as he looked from Robert to her. “Both of you.”
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“Can we talk inside?” Michael wrapped his arms around himself and stamped his feet as Clipper had.
Beth Ann almost shouted to Robert to whip up the horse and get them away from whatever bad news Michael had, but she said, “All right.”
* * *
Pausing to throw a blanket over Clipper, smoothing it across the horse’s back, Robert followed Michael and Beth Ann into the community center. Why had Michael intruded? Robert had something to tell her, too, something that might ruin everything he’d hoped for. No, it would ruin everything, which was why he’d kissed her while he could. He wouldn’t have the chance again after she learned he’d been offered a job at the hardware store in Rutland. The pay was excellent, and the hours gut, leaving him time to spend on his woodworking. It was everything he’d prayed for.
Except it was too far away from her and the kinder. Worse, once the kids were placed elsewhere, she’d be alone in Evergreen Corners and she might decide to leave. With the money from her aenti’s bequest, she could go anywhere.
Now wasn’t the time to tell her, not when Michael could hear at the same time. A part of him was relieved, but he must tell her soon.
When Michael led them to the hall between the community center and the chapel, the cold hallway was lit only by exit signs. He flipped a switch, and a single lamp came on about halfway along it. Set on a table holding hymn books, the lamp offered enough light so Robert could see the strain on his friend’s face.
“What’s up?” He was pleased he was able to put a positive spin on the question. Maybe if he stayed optimistic, the discussion would end up okay. He was fooling himself. A single glance at the tension tightening his friend’s mouth was warning enough that something was wrong. Very wrong.
Michael glanced around again, as if he expected eavesdroppers loitering in the shadows, before he asked, his breath hanging in the air, “Will you understand if we speak in Deitsch, Beth Ann?”
“I know enough to get along in most conversations. If I can’t get what you’re saying, I’ll ask.”
With a nod, he switched to the language the Amish used among themselves. “Gut. I’d rather not have to worry about any Englisch folks hearing us.” Looking at Robert, he said, “Kevin’s mentioned to me today that Douglas has new toys Kevin thinks are ‘cool.’ His word, not mine.”
“New toys?” repeated Beth Ann. As Michael began to explain, she waved his words aside. “I got what you said, but the kinder don’t have any new toys.”
“Kevin said Douglas was showing off a handheld computer game. Douglas hid it in his backpack when Cora came to check on their desk work.”
She glanced at Robert. “Did you buy the kinder presents for Christmas?”
“I did,” he replied, “but not a handheld computer game.”
“So where did Douglas get it?” asked Michael, bringing Robert’s attention to him.
“I don’t know.” He looked at Beth Ann.
She shook her head. “I don’t know, either.”
Michael drew in a deep breath. “I don’t want to accuse the boy, but I keep thinking about the thefts at the work sites.”
Robert nodded. “Those have been going on for months, ain’t so?”
“We had a few in the fall, and they stopped.” Michael met his gaze steadily. “They started again a couple weeks of ago, which is why we began locking the tools away.”
Beth Ann’s brows lowered. “Who has a key?”
“Each of our team leaders does,” Robert said. “Four of us. Michael, Jose Lopez, Vernon Umble and me. Except for me, the others have been working on and off for more than a year.”
“Is the key on your key ring?”
Dismay dropped through him like a rock over a cliff. “Ja.” He told Michael about losing his keys while shoveling snow. “They were out of my possession for no more than an hour or two.”
Michael waved aside his words. “That was only a few days ago. These robberies have been going on for at least two weeks, and...”
“Dougie had the game today,” Beth Ann said. “I hope the two aren’t connected, Michael, but I’ll talk to Dougie when we get home.”
“We will,” added Robert. “It’s time to get answers about a lot of things.”
* * *
Though Beth Ann hoped the conversation with Dougie would go well, it turned sour from the moment the younger children were put to bed and she and Robert asked Dougie to join them in the kitchen. Dougie slouched in his chair and wouldn’t look in their direction as Robert outlined what they’d been told.
“Kevin has a big mouth for such a little kid.” Dougie clamped his arms to his chest and glowered. “He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”
“No?” asked Robert. “What reason would Kevin have to lie about you showing off a fancy new computer toy?”
“I dunno.”
“Where’s the toy?” Beth Ann asked.
“I don’t have it.”
“Do you know where it is?” Robert’s tone harshened. “Playing word games might be fun on that computer, Dougie, but it’s not going to work with us.”
“I told you. I don’t have it, and I don’t know where it is.”
“Where was it when you last saw it?”
The boy shrugged.
Beth Ann put a hand on Robert’s arm. His tension was palpable through his sleeve. “Robert...”
He ignored her as he locked eyes with the boy. “Are you going to add lying to your sin of stealing?”
“I didn’t steal anything.” The boy jumped up and stood on tiptoe in an effort to put his face close to Robert’s. “Don’t call me a thief!”
“I won’t call you a thief if you confess how you got the money for that toy!”
“None of your business!”
Robert clenched his fingers into fists and took a single step toward the boy.
Beth Ann had heard and seen enough. “Stop this, both of you! Dougie, we’ll talk in the morning. Go to bed.”
“It’s too early—”
“Go to bed. If you can’t sleep, take the time to think about what you’ve done and said and ask God’s forgiveness.”
“What about him?” He hooked a thumb at Robert, who had moved away to lean one hand on the counter.
“I’m going to give him the same advice.”
When Dougie opened his mouth to retort, she scowled and pointed to the living room. The boy swaggered out of the kitchen as if he’d won the argument.
She ignored his attitude and looked at Robert as she closed the door to the other room. He appeared more distressed than he’d been when Michael sought them out at the community center.
“Give him time, Robert,” she said.
“To do what? Create more trouble?” He winced and lowered his eyes.
She wasn’
t sure what in his few words had sent pain through him. “Yelling at him won’t make him honest. He’s as stubborn as you are.”
“So how do you suggest we convince him to be honest with us?”
“Dougie has to be willing to trust us.”
“That’s not an answer. That’s...” Again he grimaced.
“What is it?” she asked.
He shook his head. “Nothing. Tired of quarreling.” Pushing away from the counter, he said, “I need to go.”
“Robert—”
“Gut nacht,” he said before he walked out, slamming the kitchen door behind him.
She stared at the vibrating door, shocked at what she’d witnessed. She’d never heard Robert use a low, menacing voice as he had when speaking to Dougie. It had unsettled him, too, because he’d stopped himself twice from saying more or grabbing the boy. Had he intended to shake some sense into Dougie?
She couldn’t guess. She knew only one thing with all her heart. Robert had said good-night as he stormed out of the kitchen, but deep inside her it felt like goodbye.
Chapter Fourteen
Beth Ann was startled when she opened the kitchen door after Robert’s departure and saw him standing in front of her. Crystal faced him, a guilty expression in her eyes. Tears bubbled out of the little girl’s eyes and rained down her cheeks.
“I should have remembered,” Robert said, looking at Beth Ann with an apologetic glance, “it’s impossible to guess who’s listening if the door is closed.”
Apologizing for not remembering or for what happened in the kitchen? She scanned the room, but didn’t see Dougie. Where was the boy? She’d look for him, but first...
Pushing past Robert, she drew Crystal into the kitchen and sat her on the chair where her brother had been moments ago. “Are you okay, sweetheart?”
“I heard shouting.” Crystal’s lashes glistened with tears. “I don’t like shouting.”
“Nobody does.” Beth Ann cut her eyes to Robert, who hadn’t left the apartment as she’d feared he would.
“Dougie shut himself in the bathroom,” the little girl said, clasping her hands tightly in her lap.
“Thank you for telling me,” Beth Ann said gently.
“I’ve got something else to tell you.” She dropped her voice to a near whisper. “Dougie doesn’t think I know, but I do.”
“What do you know?” Beth Ann asked.
“About the money he used to buy toys and how he got it.”
Firing a glance at Robert because she didn’t want him to get angry at the girl as he had with Dougie, she asked, “Will you tell us?”
Crystal chewed on her lower lip as she considered her answer.
Beth Ann tried to keep from prodding the girl to answer. She’d never guessed waiting on a stubborn baby to make an appearance would be simple in comparison to dealing with school-aged children.
“Mommy’s money,” Crystal finally answered. “Her ‘just-in-case’ money.”
“Just in case of what?”
Crystal’s eyes widened. “I don’t know. She never said.”
Beth Ann could think of several reasons Kim Henderson would have stashed money away. To pay her drug dealer or to arrange for bail if arrested. Beth Ann wanted to believe maybe she’d set aside the money so her children could eat when she wasn’t around, but the youngsters’ conditions disproved that.
“So you all knew about the money?” Robert asked.
“Aunt Sharon didn’t, and Tommy doesn’t.” She rolled her eyes. “Dougie says Tommy can’t keep a secret so we’d be foolish to let him in on it. He said I was big enough to keep my mouth shut.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a twenty-dollar bill. “I’ve remembered to take out my money when putting my clothes in the laundry. Not like Dougie.” She laughed. “Boy, was he mad at himself!”
The girl clamped both hands over her mouth as her eyes grew wide.
Beth Ann touched the child’s arm. “It’s okay, Crystal. I’m glad you’re being honest. I didn’t think the money belonged to Mayor Whittaker.”
“You gave it to her,” she said from behind her hands.
“I was waiting for you and your brothers to tell me the truth.”
Crystal moaned. “Dougie is gonna kill me.”
“No, he’s not.” Beth Ann struggled not to smile, because she knew the girl’s words were heartfelt. “Where did you get the money?”
She shut her mouth as her brother had.
Beth Ann tried another tack. “Why did Dougie buy the computer toy?”
“He wanted to stop the other boys from saying bad things about us.”
“What sort of bad things?” She waved her hand to halt the girl’s answer. “What they say doesn’t matter.”
“It does to Dougie. He doesn’t like being called a loser or a mooch.”
Robert shook his head and sighed. “He thought if he had the latest new toy everyone wanted, he’d show them he wasn’t what they said he was.”
Crystal nodded, her lip quivering.
Embracing the girl, Beth Ann wished she could find a way to protect her from the unkind words. She couldn’t, but she knew someone who could help.
“Let’s pray God will open the hearts of those who insult your brother—”
“And me?”
“And you.” She kissed the top of the child’s soft red hair. “God, please open hearts to the truth about Dougie and Crystal—”
“And Tommy!”
Beth Ann was shocked. “Has someone been teasing him?”
“No, but it doesn’t hurt to be careful, does it?”
With another hug, Beth Ann said, “God, please open hearts to the truth about Dougie and Crystal and Tommy, and let others see them as we see them. As Your beloved children. God, please let Dougie and Crystal and Tommy never forget You’re with them and they can turn to You with their hurts.”
“Amen,” Robert added.
The sound of the outer door closing silenced them. Beth Ann ran into the living room. It was empty. The door to the bathroom was wide-open.
“Dougie’s gone,” she said.
“I’ll bring him back.” Robert reached for his coat.
“Robert...” She wasn’t sure how to say what she must when Crystal—and Tommy, who was peeking around the bedroom door—were listening.
Facing her, Robert said, “I’ll do my best not to lose my temper again. I give you my word, Beth Ann.”
She wrapped her arms around the younger children as he threw open the door and vanished into the cold night.
Crystal whispered, “Should we pray for Dougie?”
“Yes.” She drew the children to her as they bowed their heads, but didn’t speak the prayer coming from her heart as she prayed for both Dougie and Robert.
* * *
The boy was heading to the dilapidated house where he’d lived, Robert knew. It was dangerous for Dougie to go inside, but it wouldn’t be the first time since he and Beth Ann had moved the kids in with her if Dougie had taken his mamm’s money.
He increased the length of his stride. He didn’t want to slip on the sidewalks where spots of black ice were waiting for the unwary pedestrian, but he also had to keep the boy from going inside that condemned house, too.
Robert breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Dougie’s smaller silhouette on the corner of the Hendersons’ street. Now to convince the boy to heed him...
I’ll do my best not to lose my temper again. I give you my word, Beth Ann.
Shame struck him like a closed fist. Was this the final punishment his daed could inflict on him? A legacy of violence and rage?
No, he was forewarned, and he must lean on God’s strength to help him overcome the cycle of anger. God and Beth Ann, who’d stepped in tonight and broken through frustration’s red curtain to calm the beast within him.
Dougie looked back as Robert approached. For the length of a single breath, the boy poised to run, then halted, hanging his head.
Robert had never guessed he’d miss the boy’s overconfidence, but he hated seeing Dougie so defeated.
“Crystal told you, ain’t so?” Dougie asked when Robert stopped beside him on the windswept sidewalk.
Robert managed to hide his astonishment when Dougie used the Amish phrase. Beth Ann had warned him kinder were sponges.
“Your sister is worried about you,” he said.
“If she was worried, she would’ve kept her mouth shut.” He shoved his hands in his coat pockets, and Robert realized he didn’t have mittens on. Or a hat or a scarf.
Taking off his scarf, he handed it to the boy. “Crystal doesn’t see it that way, and neither does Beth Ann. They’re scared you’ll get hurt if you go into your house.”
“I’ve been okay before.”
“You’re a smart kid, Dougie. The house is about to fall in. You don’t want to be inside when it does, do you?”
“No.” The answer was reluctant.
“Look. Let’s talk to Gladys tomorrow and see what we can do about getting the house down safely.”
“My mom’s money—”
“We’ll make sure whatever you and Crystal and Tommy want is out before the house is demolished.” He held his hand out to the boy. “Okay?”
Dougie shook it. “Okay.”
“Let’s go back to the apartment.”
Not moving, the boy asked, “You’re not going to yell again?”
“No, but Beth Ann is going to want you to hand over the toy and whatever else you’ve bought with your mamm’s money.”
“But—”
“Dougie, trust her and me.”
“I trust Lady Bee.”
Robert tried not to flinch at the insult the boy aimed at him. He couldn’t fault Dougie after Robert had blown up at him in the kitchen. “Gut,” he said. “Trust her, because you know she cares a lot about the three of you. Let’s go before we freeze.”