by Rebecca Shea
She pulls one of her hands from mine and wipes the tears that are falling from her striking blue eyes. My heart races as I watch her shaking hand wipe the tears, and I don’t know if those are tears of sadness or happiness.
“I’m done running from you because I should have been running to you the entire time. You are where I need to be. You are my safe place and the only person who has ever loved me unconditionally. I was so afraid you would see the real me and leave, that I ran from you, but I’m done running, Reagan.” Tears roll down her soft cheeks. I’m done making her cry. I’m done hurting her. “I can’t promise it will always be easy, but it will always be perfect for us.” I take her face in my hands and wipe her tears.
“I love you, Reagan. I choose you. I will always choose you—choose me.”
“It’s only ever been you,” she whispers, and buries herself in my arms. She holds onto me, like I’ve never been held, and this time I’m never letting her go.
“I said get her some wine and distract her, not get her fucking wasted,” I hiss at Lindsay through closed teeth. Reagan sits on a stool at the kitchen island, giggling with Matt and a couple of girls from the doctor’s office. I can’t help but stare at her and think how lucky I am that she is mine.
“We’re just waiting for Mom and Louis,” she whispers back, snapping me out of my thoughts.
“Well, where the fuck are they? And figure out a way to cut her off. I want her to remember this.”
“Really? You’re asking me where they are? And what do you expect me to do, snatch the glass of wine out of her hand? Or should I just make an announcement that she’s having far too good of a time and should really stop sipping the vino?” She rolls her eyes at me. I hate when she does that.
“Sorry we’re late!” My mom bursts through the door with a bouquet of flowers. Reagan jumps up from the island to greet them and pulls my mom into a hug. She hands me her glass of wine, thank God, and takes the flowers from my mom. “Reagan, you look beautiful,” my mom says, standing back to look at Reagan. She does. She’s wearing a black strapless pantsuit that hugs her long curves.
“So do you, Josie. I love that necklace.” Reagan returns the compliment and hands the bouquet of flowers to me. She gives me a little wink, which means go find a vase and put these in water. I know every thought she’s thinking before she ever has to tell me. That’s how it is with her—she is the other half of me.
“Louis,” Reagan says as he reaches out and pulls her hand to his lips. He places a kiss to the top of her hand and she blushes.
“Reagan, you’re simply stunning—and tall!” He laughs.
“Everyone, please, let’s sit down to eat,” I say as I stuff the flowers in a crystal vase and try to gather the small crowd of our closest friends and family to the dining room table, but everyone excitedly stands around in small groups talking, not hearing a word of what I’ve just said.
Setting the vase of flowers on the kitchen island, a sexy voice whispers in my ear from behind me, “Would anybody notice if we slipped away for a couple of minutes?” Her arms snake around my waist from behind. She trails her long fingers over my stomach muscles.
“There’s no way we’d be gone for just a couple of minutes—because what I have planned will take hours,” I whisper back at her. She squeezes me and giggles.
“Promise?”
I twist around in her arms and hold her. In her heels, she stands as tall as me, and her legs travel for miles. Her blue eyes are striking against the dark pantsuit and her long dark hair. “If you can help me gather these assholes so we can eat, I can get them out of here faster and then we can…” She presses a kiss to my lips, stopping me.
“Deal,” she says. “All right, everyone—sit!” she says, taking over the room. Everyone follows her to the long table that is covered in more china than I’ve ever seen before, truly a touch of Reagan. Reagan prepared a delicious meal with the help of a local caterer—prime rib, grilled salmon, and enough side dishes to feed a small army. I sit back and look at the table of our friends and family eating, smiling, and laughing and wonder how, in just a year, my life is so seemingly different—better. Lindsay is whispering something to Matt and he laughs. She better not ruin this surprise. Louis sits with a protective arm around my mom’s shoulders while sipping a glass of red wine.
To have my mom sitting at my dining room table is something I never imagined happening. With the help of Reagan and Lindsay, we’ve forged a new relationship. It has not been an easy road, but I’m finding that when I choose the roads that aren’t guaranteed to be easy, I’m finding the best surprises along the way. I’m excited to have her back in my life and look forward to sharing many more years with her.
“So.” I push my seat back and stand up. Reagan places her napkin on the table and joins me at my side. “Reagan and I have an announcement.” The dining room quiets suddenly and everyone looks around. The girls all gasp and Lindsay reaches for Reagan’s left hand. Reagan pulls it back quickly and shakes her head.
“So a year ago, I met this beautiful lady.” I pull Reagan’s hand into mine, lacing our fingers together. “We’ve had a crazy year—lots of ups and downs and new beginnings,” I smile at her. My mom’s eyes fill with tears and she leans into Louis as I continue.
“Reagan and I wanted to bring our closest friends and family together to say thank you for supporting us, but to share some exciting news with you.” I step back from Reagan, dropping her hand before I pull out the large board that I stashed behind the large plant in the corner.
“Reagan and I are selling our homes and building a house—together.” I hold up the sketch of the house that Reagan and I hired an architect to draw up. It’s the perfect combination of classic and modern, Reagan and me.
“That’s it?” Lindsay bursts out. “I thought you’re going to get engaged.” She sets her drink down animatedly. Everyone laughs, and Reagan is buying right into this.
“Pfft,” Reagan snorts. “We love each other, Linds… but don’t hold your breath on an engagement anytime soon. I mean the look of anxiety on his face when he had to sign for a mortgage loan with me, you should have seen it. He was sweating…” She pauses when she looks around at everyone’s faces. The room is silent again and Lindsay has her hands covering her mouth. Matt is sitting next to her, smiling, and my mom is damn near hysterical, crying.
“Reagan,” I say, getting her attention. She turns around slowly and looks down at me on bended knee.
“What are you doing?” she asks with a look of concern on her face. “Get up.”
“Reagan, I know we invited everyone over here to tell them about our new house—but there’s something else I want to do while they are all here.” Her eyes open a little wider and her body stills. Sheer terror grips at me as I reach into my pocket and pull out the little black velvet box I’ve been hiding for weeks. Picking out a ring that is perfect enough for her was singlehandedly the hardest thing I’ve ever done. There is no diamond, no gold—no gem beautiful enough to describe my love for her.
“A year ago, I met a girl in a bar.” Everyone laughs quietly. “And she changed my life.” She smiles down at me. “And while our path wasn’t always smooth, it led us to here.” Suddenly, Reagan drops to her knees in front of me. Her arms are shaking as she lifts her hands, clasping them in front of her chest.
“What are you saying?” she asks me, her voice breaking.
“I want more than just a house with you. I want a family, I want a future, and I want to be the last person you love. Will you marry me?”
“Yes,” she says. “More than anything in the world, yes.”
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Turn the page for a brief look into the companion novel,
Unforgiven
Lindsay and Matt’s story
“Well, that went better than I expected.” I breathe a sigh of relief as I slide into bed next to Matt.
“Because it’s been obvious to everyone around us what’s been going on for the last year. We clearly suck at being discreet, Lindsay.”
“I’m just glad we don’t have to lie anymore.”
“We weren’t lying; we just weren’t being open about our relationship,” he says, wrapping his naked, lean, yet muscular body around me.
“I guess, but it just didn’t feel right, keeping us a secret.”
“I like when you say us.” He presses a kiss to my lips, then behind my ear.
“I like it when you do that,” I whisper, “and I like it when you…” My work cell phone begins ringing, interrupting us.
“Leave it,” Matt growls in my ear.
“I can’t.” He rolls off of me while I reach onto the nightstand and glance at my agent’s name flashing on the screen.
“It’s Jack,” I mumble as I jump out of bed and pull on a robe.
“Jack,” I answer curtly.
“Lindsay, I presume you’ve gotten my three voicemails, two emails, and endless text messages. Why the hell haven’t you returned one of them?”
“We had an important family dinner. I’m sorry.” I notice Matt slide out of bed and step into a pair of chambray-colored pajama pants. His tan skin is perfection against the light blue. He leaves the room while I talk in a hushed tone with Jack.
“Lindsay, this isn’t an opportunity to pass up,” he says, his voice becoming louder. Jack is my agent and one pushy motherfucker. “People kill to get into a market the size of Phoenix. The money is phenomenal, the exposure…”
“Phoenix,” I whisper as I pace the bedroom. “I need a couple of days,” I respond, a million thoughts swirling through my head.
“A couple of days, Lindsay?” Jack repeats me.
“Did I stutter, Jack? I need a couple of days. When we had lunch last week, you mentioned looking for other opportunities, but I didn’t realize it would happen so fast and so fucking far away. Do you have any idea where Phoenix is, Jack?”
“It’s in Arizona, Lindsay. Listen to me. If you don’t take this job, it will be the biggest mistake of your career.” His husky voice pulls me from thoughts of everything I’ll miss if I leave Wilmington.
“Two days, Jack. I need two days. Give me that. Stall them.”
There is a large sigh on the other end of the phone, and what sounds like a hand hitting a table. “You have until noon on Friday.”
“Thank you, Jack.” He disconnects the phone without saying goodbye. I know he’s pissed. I catch a glimpse of Matt leaning against the doorframe of the bedroom. His head has fallen forward and he stares at the ground.
“Talk to me,” I say as I walk over and wrap my arms around him.
“What do you want me to say, Lindsay? It sounds like you have a great opportunity—and I’ll be damned if I’m going to be the person to hold you back from that.” His dark brown eyes meet mine.
“What would you do if you were me?” I ask him.
“That’s easy. I’d choose you because I love you and you mean more to me than any job or any opportunity. But Lindsay, I will not stop you from chasing this dream. You will live with your decisions for the rest of your life. I never want to be a decision you regret.” He pulls away from me as he turns toward the hallway. “But promise me something, will you?” I nod at him as a lump forms in my throat. “Follow your heart. I know you better than you know yourself and I know how your brain works— listen to your heart.” I hear him shuffle down the hall toward the kitchen.
I have no idea how long I’ve been standing, staring at that damn phone when I pick it up and hit Jack’s name on the recent calls screen.
“Lindsay,” his deep voice drawls.
“I’ll do it.” My voice shakes. “I’ll take it.” My heart sinks and tears fill my eyes.
“Welcome to Phoenix, Sweetheart.”
My legs are weak and my hands shake as I second guess my decision to leave, knowing I very well may be making the biggest mistake of my life. Sliding down the wall I’ve been leaning against for support, I wrap my arms around my knees as I try to calm myself. Glancing back at the open door, I see Matt standing in defeat, broken. His brown eyes are grim, lost, while his face says everything my heart is feeling—shattered.
This is almost harder than writing a novel. There are always endless amounts of people to thank and I always worry I’m going to miss someone.
Thank you to my family for living with me when I’m excited, angry, sad, delusional, and insane. When you live with characters that talk inside your head, it always makes for an interesting environment. But mostly, thank you for your never-ending support, even when it means sacrificing the most precious thing we have together—time.
Thank you to my readers. There are not enough thank you’s to go around. Thank you for loving Unbreakable and forcing me to write Landon’s story. I loved that you all fell in love with a beautiful, dark, damaged man named Landon. I hope you will continue with this series and love Lindsay and Matt just as much.
Cisco: Thank you for answering every single stupid question I had about law enforcement, and for letting me crawl around in your head for a bit. Your stories, your advice, your opinions helped shape this book and I’m eternally grateful (and you’re not off the hook yet—Matt’s a cop too!)
Amy, Molly, and Kristen: I still love us.
Lauren: Thank you for loving Unbreakable and helping me brainstorm for Undone. It amazes me that friendship can blossom from a single message and grow into something beautiful. Thank you for your friendship and your help. I adore you.
Christine Estevez, thank you for being the biggest supporter, the biggest champion, the best blog tour host, and an amazing friend. I love you to the moon and back.
My beta readers: thank you for your input, advice, and guidance. You have no idea how much I appreciate you.
My street team girls: especially, Virginia and Kelly. Thank you for your endless support and keeping me sane when I have my “moments.” Love you all!
Regina Wamba: I’m not sure there is a better cover for this story. You are amazing… but more importantly, you are the kindest person I’ve ever met. Caribou—soon! Love you.
Bloggers: Thank you for loving Unbreakable and promoting the hell out of me, and now Undone. Without you, I am nothing. Your support means the world. Thank you.
I’m sure I’ve missed a million of you. I’m so thankful to everyone for your support! I hope you loved Undone as much as I loved writing it and I can’t wait to share Unforgiven with you.
CONNECT WITH REBECCA SHEA
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