Aird said, “You go. Consider it your final duty.”
Oxer said, “Not bloody likely. I’m off.”
Aird said, “Well, I’m not wandering naked amongst crazy Magyars.”
And he left immediately, with some cockamamie story about having to get a prescription filled. HRH ended up going with Boss Croker and two detectives.
Wally says she’d fire Aird in a heartbeat. I really don’t see why we need all these equerries anyway. HRH was only going for a steam and a rubdown, and as Boss says, the visibility was too poor for an assassination attempt.
Charlie Bedaux is here, but not Fern. He’s traveling with a scar-faced Frenchman. Ethel believes there are actually several Charlie Bedaux, ready to materialize with a fistful of cigars, anywhere, at any propitious moment.
6th September 1935
To a cellar bar. Dancing to gypsy violins. Wally and HRH are indefatigable. By three a.m., I was ready for bed, but David said, “You mustn’t leave. I’m going to ask for some more czardas.”
Personally, I couldn’t have eaten another thing. In the end, Ethel and I retired and left Boss and Charlie and his friend to see the night through.
9th September 1935
With Wally and Ethel for a sulfur cure. Then to Lukacs for cherry pancakes, to take the nasty taste away.
I’ve bought the pin with the little flowers. Perhaps I’ll give it to Doopie as a wedding gift. Then again, perhaps I won’t.
Charlie Bedaux says Hitler is going to purge Germany of Jewish Marxists. Boss says Hitler appears to be spending money he doesn’t have, so he’d better be careful not to purge any obliging Jewish bankers.
12th September 1935
To the KrisKros Club. A wonderful floor show. A little pony that can count, tumbling monkeys in romper suits, and a tame black jaguar. Charlie and the scar-faced Mr. Gregoire joined us. Wally says he got his scar in a duel years ago, and he’s now a brilliant lawyer. I think she’s rather smitten. Jack Aird says, with a shaving shadow like that, Gregoire wouldn’t even get past the gate porter in Lincoln’s Inn.
15th September 1935
Mr. Mussolini has refused to be cowed by the threat of sanctions. Boss thinks there really may be a war, and we should all go home. Wally says whatever Mussolini does, she’s going to Paris first and so is HRH. She says I can please myself.
16th September 1935
To the Pussy Cat Club. Wore my rainbow voile and my new rhinestone fascinator. The floor show consisted of girls wearing nothing but spangles. HRH giggled helplessly.
Tomorrow my first flight. Ethel says there’s nothing to it.
19th September 1935, Wilton Place
The joy of traveling the modern way! We had touched down at Croydon, and I was on my way home when I might still have been lurching and bumping across Germany in a railroad car. Wally really has to overcome her fears.
22nd September 1935
Took the little Hungarian brooch to South Audley Street, but Lightfoot and Doopie are apparently still honeymooning on the Isle of Skye. On to Carlton Gardens, where Violet was in a black mood. Flora has already been expelled from the school in Suffolkshire for setting fires, and was dispatched this morning to Rathgussie to stay with her Aunt Jinty and receive a dose of sharp Scottish discipline. Also, Their Majesties are in low spirits, and Violet seems incapable of enjoying life if the King and Queen are out of sorts. But low spirits are only to be expected. All this rain, all this gloom about Mussolini, after a summer of sunshine and gay balls and cheering crowds. They’re experiencing a natural sense of letdown.
Violet said, “They allowed Wales to go to Cannes on the understanding that Wally Simpson’s husband would be in the party, which I’m sure was never going to be the case. And now he’s taken her to Paris, interfering in government business and dragging her everywhere he goes.”
I said, “I think Wally’s only there to order clothes.”
She said, “Well, Wales isn’t ordering clothes. He’s meeting high-level people, and Wally is a liability of the first order. She’s a liar and an impostor.”
Apparently, investigations have been made into the back of the Warfield closet.
It’s come to light that her mother was unmarried when she was born, and Wally was never christened.
I said, “Well, that can hardly matter now. She’s nearly forty.”
Violet said, “It certainly does matter. It means she had that wedding in Christ Church, Baltimore, under false pretenses. It sums up everything about her.”
I said, “But if that’s the case, and her marriage to Win Spencer was irregular, then Ernest is actually her first husband, not her second, and there’s therefore no reason not to allow her into the Royal Enclosure at Ascot next year.”
That silenced her.
25th September 1935
Lunch with Penelope Blythe. She was in the next chair at Monsieur Jules and seemed at a loose end. She and Fergus have had a reconciliation. Boring, but necessary, she said. It had been a question of jingle. She lamented George Lightfoot’s disappearance into the maw of marriage. She said, “I know she’s your sister, but really! That puts him hors de combat for at least two years.”
She says Ralph Habberley isn’t in Bolivia at all but in Egypt with Ida Coote. He has a cousin there, who’s in cotton. Jane Habberley apparently believes his behavior was all brought on by a fall he had riding out with the Quorn Fox Hounds. She wants him to see a brain man in Wigmore Street.
30th September 1935
Dinner with Pips and Freddie. Freddie says Violet is right about one thing: HRH had no business going to Paris and discussing British foreign policy.
He said, “I don’t understand the man. He tells people all he wants is Wally at his side and more time for golf, and then he steams off to Paris and starts playing the statesman. Eden is at his wits’ end, and so, apparently, is the King. Strictly between these four walls, it might not be a bad thing if David and Wally were to take the plunge, go away somewhere. Give Bertie York a year or two to limber up, I believe he could do the job as well if not better.”
2nd October 1935
George and Doopie are back from their honeymoon. Doopie bashful with me, as well she should be. She liked her Hungarian pin. She’s very upset about Flora.
“Boor Vora,” she kept saying. “Boor Vora. See sood gum live wid us.”
George said, “Darling, we have to respect Violet and Melhuish’s decision. But I’m sure they’ll let her visit. I can’t believe Jinty will be anxious to hold on to her for long.”
They asked me to stay to dinner, but I see enough kissing and hand-holding at the table when I’m with Wally and her Prince.
4th October 1935
Mr. Mussolini has invaded Abyssinia.
7th October 1935
Wally is back from Paris. Main Bocher is making her five wool suits and three evening gowns, one in balboa, two in charmeuse. She says it was the best part of the vacation, because HRH was kept busy all day brokering peace and she had lots of time for shopping with Elsie Mendl and her useful antique-sleuth, Kenny Opdyke.
Lady Mendl gave a dinner, and the lawyer Gregoire introduced Wally to everyone worth knowing.
I said, “And how’s Ernest?”
She said, “I haven’t seen him yet. This little Italian war is creating extra work.”
I said, “And are you going to Prince Harry’s wedding?”
She said, “Prince Harry? Who cares about a minor royal wedding? I’m beyond that.”
11th October 1935
Marina Kent has given birth to a son.
15th October 1935
Dinner at the Belchesters. Came: the Westminsters, the Boddie-Fultons, Violet and Melhuish, Oxer Bettenbrooke. Much talk of the situation in Abyssinia. Percy Boddie-Fulton says there’s a killing to be made in mining rights. If Danforth Brumby were still alive, he’d be in there already. Anne Belchester has a bee in her bonnet that the League of Nations should be doing something.
Melhuish said, “You’
re wrong, Anne. In these little African situations, it’s almost always best to do nothing. It’s no use baying for sanctions and then finding them left on one’s hands, like yesterday’s herrings.”
Fiona Boddie-Fulton said, “What I’d like to know is, what does Wales think he’s up to, sticking in his silly oar? Is he trying to send the King to an early grave?”
Violet tried to hush her, but the Belchesters’ hock was talking.
She said, “No, Violet, Oxer is a member of the Inner Circle. I think he should explain.”
Oxer said, “Nothing to do with me. Ask Aird. All I did was pay the bills and oil the wheels from Cannes to Budapest.”
I said, “That’s funny. I thought Boss Croker paid most of the bills and Ladbroke oiled the wheels.”
Much laughter. Belchester said, “Henry VI, Part II. And that’s my only word on the subject.”
I said, “And what does that mean?”
He said, “York is the worthier. That’s what it means. Mark my words.”
26th October 1935
To Carlton Gardens. Flora is still at Rathgussie.
Ulick said, “Best place for her. One can’t go around setting fires. It’s completely not done.”
I said, “Well, I just hope she doesn’t climb out onto any more roofs.”
Ulick said, “I can’t agree. A cold night on the tiles might do her a world of good.”
Took Rory to the Golden Egg.
I said, “Why didn’t you tell me Doopie and Lightfoot were planning to get married?”
Sheepish grin.
He said, “Well, I only sort of knew. It wasn’t definite until Aunt Doopie said it was. Daddy says it’s a lady’s privilege to change her mind.”
He has a new trick with steel rings.
7th November 1935
Prince Harry has married Alice Montagu-Douglas-whatever her name was, and they’ve been made the Duke and Duchess of Gloucester. Lightfoot says now the pressure is really on HRH. The one they’re looking to for an heir, and he’s the only one not married.
I said, “Just because you rushed into things. David has plenty of time. He’s young for his age.”
16th November 1935
Wally and Ernest seem to be over their difficulties. Wally’s stayed home every evening this week, and now they’ve gone to the Perry Brownlows for the weekend.
I, on the other hand, am invited to Fort Belvedere!
17th November 1935, Fort Belvedere
Dickie and Edwina Mountbatten are here with their two little girls. HRH seems to dote on them. Dickie’s such a fusspot, always checking his timepiece and squaring things away. He must be the bane of his sailors’ lives. Edwina is much more relaxed. She’s quite willing to stretch her long legs on a couch and leaf through a magazine. Also here, Bernie and Zita Cavett and the Erlangers. Hattie says the reason Edwina Mountbatten acts the tiniest bit grand is a sense of inferiority, because Dickie’s a royal and all she brought to the marriage was pots of money.
I said, “Dickie’s only a minor royal. And there’s nothing wrong with money. I’m sure you’ve been glad of Judson’s.”
“Well,” she said, “at least Judson’s isn’t Jewish money.”
Took morning tea with HRH after our calisthenics.
He said, “Do you know what I’d really like to do, Maybell? I’d like to take Wally and run away to my place in Canada. Leave the world behind.”
I don’t really see Wally as a rancher’s wife. Alberta would be a terribly long way to come for fittings, but I didn’t have the heart to say so. I think I’d better warn Wally. Just when things seemed to be settling down.
20th November 1935, Wilton Place
Lunch with Pips. She, too, thinks the worst of the storm has now passed. She said, “All credit to Ernest. He’s sweated it out and now he may well get his wife back. If he really wants her. Talk about used goods!”
Hattie thinks the Palace are about to rustle up a princess and get a ring on her finger immediately.
I said, “David didn’t say anything when I talked to him.”
She said, “It’ll probably be in the bag before he realizes what’s going on. Like giving a dog a worm powder.”
25th November 1935
If Flora continues to keep her slate clean, she’s to be allowed back to London for Christmas. The Cavetts want me for Christmas night, so that all works out rather well. Wally and Ernest have accepted, too.
I said, “All quiet on the home front?”
“Yes,” she said. “Almost too quiet.”
9th December 1935
Ernest is in Stockholm. HRH came to Bryanston Court for drinks but couldn’t stay to dinner. His Aunt Toria died today, so he had to go and condole with Their Majesties. He says she was a hypochondriac and an old shrew but she cheered the King up with her complaining so he’s bound to feel her loss greatly, which foreshadows an even gloomier Christmas than usual.
12th December 1935
My Christmas plans have fallen into place. On Christmas Eve, dinner at the Erlangers. On Christmas afternoon, tea at Carlton Gardens, then Kettle will drive me to the Cavetts in Surrey. Wally’s joyful at the prospect of my company there. She says my job will be to engage Ernest in gay chitchat if HRH’s telephone calls become too frequent. As she says, she doesn’t particularly welcome all those calls, either. They go on forever and never amount to anything. But she’s determined to see it out now and hopes Ernest can be soothed into doing the same. Well, if anyone call pull it off it’s Wally. Still, I do feel for Ernest. He’s not a bad husband by any stretch.
21st December 1935, Fort Belvedere
Our last royal weekend for a while. Ernest has made himself busy in town. HRH leaves for Sandringham tomorrow afternoon, so he and Wally have exchanged Christmas jewels. From her to him, a set of onyx dress links. From him to her, a gold clasp bracelet set with three rubies. I gave him a red Japanese maple. I said, “To save you going away to Canada, sir.” He laughed. Almost the only time I’ve heard laughter today.
Poots Butler says Humphrey and Fruity keep trying to have a man-to-man chat with the Prince, but so far they haven’t managed to separate him from Wally.
She said, “You and I have to take her away for an hour or two tomorrow morning. It has to be done.”
I said, “Wally’s not the problem. I’m sure she’d love to go into town. The problem is getting David to let her out of his sight. He’s not going to see her for three weeks.”
She said, “Well, Humphrey’s determined to have this out with him. The King won’t stand for any more half-truths and gossip about Wally. He’s in an absolutely thundering mood. David has to be made to understand. The party’s over.”
22nd December 1935
Wally came to church with me, Poots, and Baba. It was quite charming and took only forty-five minutes. HRH tried to talk her out of it, but she insisted that he see Fruity and Humphrey. She said, “They’re only courtiers, darling. Don’t be scared of them. You’re the Prince of Wales.”
When we got back, Humphrey and Fruity were fuming over very early whiskies, and HRH was bubbling away, talking about taking Wally to Palm Beach in the New Year.
Baba said, “No joy?”
Fruity said, “It went in one ear and out the other.”
Baba said, “Not surprising. There’s very little in between to stop it.”
27th December 1935, chez Cavett, Teddington
Flora was back from Rathgussie in time for Christmas. A little thinner. She sat between me and Doopie at Carlton Gardens and hardly said a word. Violet was very much on edge, checking all the time that the help hadn’t left matches lying around, whispering to Lightfoot not to flaunt his cigarette lighter. He said, “I think you’re worrying unnecessarily, Vee. She’s tried her hand at fires and all it bought her was a long stretch at Rathgussie. I don’t believe it’ll happen again. She may try other types of mayhem, but I think we’re safe from being roasted.”
Rory thinks it might be better if they didn’t send he
r to any more schools for a while. He said, “She just likes playing with her dolls. My friend Massingham’s sister only likes riding her pony. Girls can get away with that kind of thing, because they’ll never have to go into Parliament or the Colonial Service or anything.”
Lightfoot said, “I don’t know. Lady Astor’s in the Commons, never forget.”
Ulick said, “And that surely strengthens the argument against educating girls.”
Much talk, too, about the divinely handsome Mr. Eden who is the new Foreign Secretary. Melhuish doesn’t care for him. He says Eden seems determined to make an example of Mussolini.
He said, “Why not let him have Abyssinia? No one else wants it, except a few spear carriers and that strange cove Selassie.”
Rory put on a little display of conjuring for us after tea and asked Flora to be his assistant. He said it was safer than allowing her to sit in the audience shouting out all his magic secrets.
I gave her a compendium of board games. It will give her an interest, wherever she ends up. She said, “I expect I’ll be going to live with Doopie and Uncle Lightfoot.”
The poor deluded child.
Bernie and Zita have the Milwaukee Gunters staying, which is a further diversion for Ernest. The Gunters are Ernest’s kind of people, and Bernie and Zita are very gay hosts. There’s never a quiet moment. HRH called three times, and then Wally went out for a drive with Zita, leaving me to speak to him if he called again, which, of course, he did.
Gone With the Windsors Page 25