by Forest,Lynn
Admonishing himself for wanting to stay for a minute, he shook his head and picked up the clothes and walked back up the hill and set about burying the bloodied garments. He took a deep breath and put the shovel back on the wagon bed, then leaned against the wagon and pulled off his boots. He took off his belt and some of the insignia that he would have to transfer to his clean shirt, then to be absolutely safe he grabbed his rifle and walked down toward the river.
He made it a point to whistle loudly to forewarn Emily of his arrival, but she just bobbed up and down in the water facing him, and waving at him and motioned for him to get into the water. As he placed his own clean clothing in a pile in the grass and began to strip off his clothing, she yelled to him, “Okay, I'm turning around now.” He did not know if it was his imagination that she had made the transition from reliving a nightmarish trauma to calling to him with a playful lilt to her voice.
She then laughed as she shouted out to him again, “I love this little stream. It's just like the one that flows right behind our house. My father built this beautiful little bridge over it so that he can pull wagons and machinery into the fields.” He was surprised at how self-conscious he felt when he was himself naked and stepping into the cool water.
Feeling awkward in the circumstances, as soon as he was able to crouch down so that he was mostly submerged, he found it to be somewhat of a challenge to know that you are keeping your back turned when you don't know what the other person is doing. That was when Emily heard him laughing, and she turned around and called out to him, “Please tell me what you find so funny.” Instinctively, Charles turned to face her, and then both their faces turned pink as he sighed, “Well, that didn't last long, now did it?”
She swam on her stomach a few feet closer to him and shook her head. “Oh, well. I guess we just need to turn our backs when we get out. Now, Major Charles Morrow, Sir… I asked you what was so funny.” He was transfixed by the smile on her face. “I quickly realized that for us to be at eye level when you are standing up, I have to almost rest on my knees.” She started to laugh, and then her expression turned serious and she pointed to his left shoulder and she swam closer. “That's an ugly scar.”
He looked down, closed his eyes and nodded. “My first day in battle, I was a new Lieutenant, and we engaged some Confederate cavalry in Tennessee. A minute into the battle, I was hit by a sword. I couldn't believe how much it bled.” He then pointed to another scar on his right ribs. “This is from a musket ball from another battle in Tennessee.”
She looked at him in silence for a moment, biting her lip. She reached out and placed her fingertips on the scar, and gently stroked it. “I didn't know that you had been wounded. And twice.” He nodded slowly and shrugged. “That's two of them. I suppose I won't let you see the other one.” For the first time since he had laid eyes on Emily, he heard her giggle and he found the sweet laugh to be nothing but enchanting. And he wondered if she knew that she was batting her eyes at him.
“You're just teasing me. You're just trying to embarrass me, and we both know how good you are at embarrassing me.” Charles sighed deeply and turned around, nearly crouching in the water that was nearly up to her neck. “Go ahead and find it.” Once again, there was that mesmerizing giggle.
He felt her warm fingertips exploring his shoulders and the middle of his back. “Lower.” He then laughed as her fingertips moved softly all across the middle of his back. “Still lower.” Now Emily was laughing hard as she reached down to his buttocks, and finally felt the large jagged scar on his left cheek. He felt her nearly jump when she finally touched the scar.
“Oh, my… what happened to you that time?” He turned around to face her, but she kept her fingertips on him as he turned, and they soon were pressing up against each other as her fingertips continued to stroke his cheeks. “It was about a year ago, in Georgia, and an artillery shell went off nearby. A piece of jagged shrapnel sliced into me. Can you imagine something sizzling hot slamming into your butt?”
She arched her eyebrows and nodded her head slowly and emphatically. “Yes, I am thinking of your open hand at the moment.” They both laughed for a moment, and then they went silent as each of them closed their eyes and pressed their lips together as Emily wrapped her legs around Charles' torso as the kisses continued and intensified.
“So tell me, Major Morrow, was this included in your orders?” He closed his eyes and shook his head, but suddenly his expression was solemn. “No, it wasn't. I think that right now we should get dressed and be on our way so I don't spend the rest of my life feeling that I did a dishonorable thing by taking advantage of a vulnerable young woman.”
She leaned closer and placed her head on his shoulder. “I'm so sorry about all the trouble I've caused. I mean… I think that you're just such a decent man.” Now she was sobbing once again, and she squeezed her arms even tighter around Charles. “I'm so confused right now.”
Charles stroked her back beneath the water. “And that's why I'm not going to take advantage. I’ve had enough medical training in the Army to recognize shock, and that’s why you’re not acting your rebellious little self, right now.
“All of that aside, I'm not sure you know yet who you really are and who you want to be. It's not like I wouldn't give anything to…” He took a deep breath and struggled to continue, “I mean, any healthy man who met you would… I think you know what I mean. But I would never feel right about it.”
She leaned her head away and looked at him with the dreamiest blue eyes he had ever seen. “Even if it's what I want to happen? I'm an adult, modern woman, and I can make those choices.”
“I understand that, Emily. But one of the ironies of being young is that you have a whole lifetime to look back in judgment about the things that you've done. As for me, I was sent here to be your protector. I guess it would be a breach of my duties as an officer in the United States Army to do what I would love to do with you right now.”
Her eyes were now filled with tears, but she was still smiling. “You're not referring to spanking me again, are you? You seem to have that down to a skill.”
“I have to be honest with you, Miss Emily, it's not the most unpleasant task I have ever performed.”
She tilted her head as if puzzled. “I couldn't help but wonder if you didn't find that to be fun.”
He shrugged. “Let's say I found it necessary.”
A meek smile crept across her face. “Actually, so did I, as much as I hate to admit it. I suppose that any man who wanted to court me would find my stubbornness to be a bit of a problem.”
A pained expression came across his face. “I have to be honest with you, Emily. I would have a hard time accepting that part of your personality. I'm just being honest with you.”
Tears were once again rolling down her cheeks. “I promise that I would try real hard. But, you know that it's not easy for me to be cooperative.”
He smiled and nodded his head. “I believe that you would try hard, but I have a livestock farm. It's a lot of hours and a lot of work, and I have to be able to call the shots. You would have to think about that. I mean, while we're courting.”
Emily pursed her lips and arched her eyes. “Sounds like I could easily end up getting spanked from time to time. Unless I behaved, that is, and I think we both know the odds of that.”
Charles exhaled a deep breath that appeared to be painful. “And you know that would be difficult for me considering what all of my responsibilities would be.”
She nodded knowingly, and lowered her eyes. “I guess it's a good thing that we didn't go ahead and…”
He sighed deeply and smiled. “I suppose that a close call can't come any closer than that.”
She cleared her throat loudly, “I agree. I've never had one of those things poking at me before.”
They went silent for a moment, then met for another kiss and began slowly and reluctantly to let go of their holds on each other before Charles spoke, “I think I can have you home sometime tomor
row.” Without another word, with both of their hearts heavy and beating hard, they walked hand-in-hand out of the water, up on to the bank into the soft grass and got dressed.
Chapter Four
When they got back on the wagon, there was no longer a revolver on the seat between them. Emily sat pressed against him as she told him about her family and their farm, and he told her about his past and future life as a cattle farmer. Neither of them seemed to be in a hurry, and as they neared Covington and the area was much more densely inhabited, they felt a mutual combination of exhilaration and dread.
As they made their way north and talked, time seemed to pass by all too quickly, meeting travelers whose horses were laboring to make their way up the valley, their own horses leisurely plodding along with the long descent to the river. Finally, in the distance, they could see that the terrain had opened up and they knew that the river was not far away.
After a little while longer, as the sun was beginning to fall, they could see the mottled blue and brown expanse of the big river, and the town of Covington before them, and across the river the bustling riverfront of Cincinnati. Now they were safe, surrounded by people numbering in the many hundreds on the Kentucky side of the Ohio, and thousands more on the other side.
They rode on down to where the Army garrison was operating the crossing barges, steam powered open boats capable of carrying not only passengers and troops but all kinds of shipping goods. They dismounted the wagon and Charles checked in with the Colonel in charge of the garrison to confirm that he and Emily could cross the following morning. That being arranged, the Colonel offered to allow them to stay in one of the primitive but cramped barracks at the site.
Charles thanked the commander for the offer, but he decided to surprise Emily by treating her to spending the night in the very modest, but at least present, inn along the riverbank nearby. As his own commanding General had wired the river garrison to make them aware of Charles' mission, his pay was awaiting him there.
He found Emily standing along the river and looking across, and he could not help but conclude that her expression seemed more wistful than happy. But when he told her that he planned to arrange for her to stay in comfort that night, her attitude seemed to perk up. She eagerly climbed back onto the wagon, and they made their way several hundred yards to where the modest establishment overlooked the water.
The sky was threatening, and upon entering the inn and verifying that two rooms would be available, Charles also received permission for the wagon and the horses to be sheltered in the nearby stable. As Emily stood on the columned porch and waited, Charles put the horses and wagon away for the evening, and just as he was finishing his walk back to the inn, the skies opened with a heavy downpour.
The innkeeper and his wife showed them to their rooms on the second floor of what had been, at one time, a large and grand private home. The furnishings of the rooms were basic, but at least there was a soft bed and a washbasin and pitcher of water in each. Having placed the few belongings they needed in their rooms, they went back downstairs and joined several other travelers around the long dining table to partake of a meal of roasted beef and potatoes with loads of hard, crusty bread and dishes of actual butter.
Although Emily lived a life of luxury, she had never felt so grateful for shelter, food, and the company. Even though the June weather had been mild, the rainstorm brought with it cool breezes, and when the innkeeper started a welcome blaze in a large stone fireplace in the great room where the dining table was located, Charles and Emily decided to sit for a while in front of the fire on a small leather sofa. After they had sat quietly for a moment, Emily leaned her head against Charles' shoulder, so he put his arm around her.
He looked down at her and brushed a lock of brown hair from in front of her eyes. “What are you thinking right now?” Immediately, her face turned pink before she could begin to respond in a whispered voice, “I was thinking about us in the river today, I'm so confused right now. I know that we've only known each other for a few days, so I suppose it really wouldn't have been right. I can't tell whether I'm going to spend sleepless nights wishing it had happened, or if I'm going to feel confident that I did the right thing. I think you understand.”
He gave her shoulder a squeeze. “We did the right thing. It would have been too rash.”
She looked up at him and smiled. “The funny thing is, I can't understand, but when we walked up the bank together to get dressed, I didn't feel the least bit embarrassed. I just felt so comfortable with you, and I don't understand that.”
He took a deep breath and shrugged. “You had just been through some very upsetting experiences.”
She squeezed her eyes shut and bit her lower lip. “Now I know what you mean about being haunted by the look of the face of someone when you kill them. I don't know if I'm ever going to get that vision to leave me in peace. I had a dream last night when I was asleep on that wagon bed that I had picked up a gun and pulled the trigger, thinking I was all alone, and that a man fell dead and bloody in front of me. Will that ever go away?”
He thought for a moment. “I guess both of us will just have to hope that it will. And you know, I have those dreams every night. Sometimes I wake up at night and I swear that I can smell the death, that smell of gunpowder, and hearing the screams.”
She leaned her head against his chest. “I'm really not sure what all I'm feeling right now.”
He began to run his fingers through her wavy brown hair. “You just need to get home and spend some quiet time with your family. You need some time having your life back to normal.” He felt her press her head against him harder. “But I know that I'm going to miss you.”
He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. “But, I'm still not even certain that you truly like me. Today, I think that was just an emotional recovery from all of the fear.”
She looked up at him and smiled. “I am very confused right now. I don't know what I want. But I know that I'm very well past not liking you.” She sighed and whispered to him, “I wish this trip would've taken a couple of days longer. Over the past day, I started seeing you in a completely different way. When we started out, I thought you were some kind of pompous warrior out to prove his manhood.”
She snuggled closer against him. “You're not that way at all.”
He closed his eyes and a smile creased his lips. “All I want is to go back to my cattle farm and run it the way my father would have wanted me to.” He cleared his throat loudly. “Actually, that's really not all that I want. I guess that we both understand that. But I'm confused, too.”
She sighed deeply. “What are the possibilities? We have to be honest with ourselves. I seem to be a handful of trouble for any man. Maybe, I'm too much trouble.”
“Probably until the end of the war, I'm going to be stationed at Camp Harrison. But I really won't be able to see you much at all during that time. I've been warned that I'm going to have long days, every day, training new soldiers. And if those young fools who thought that you were a spy were any indication, I may not have enough patience.”
She felt his chest moving and realized that he was chuckling. “Now, what's so funny?”
“I'm just reliving for the moment that scene that I came upon, you tied up and bent over…” His words were halted by an elbow to the ribs.
With a smile on her face, she shook a scolding finger at him. “Let's not tell anyone else about my circumstances when you found me.”
He began to laugh, but then his expression turned solemn. “It's how you ended up in that situation that gives me pause. I don't think I could ever be the kind of man who wouldn't want to protect you and keep you out of trouble every day, forever. I just don't know if I could handle having that kind of a worry on my mind every day. I'm afraid I would end up spanking you quite often.”
“I don't know why that doesn't scare me away, but if anything, it makes me feel…” A moment of silence passed before her soft voice spoke quietly, “Charles, I keep hearing
you say things that sound like…uhm… I get the impression you would like for us to be together. I mean, I think I heard you use the word 'forever'. And this morning in the river, I was burning for us to…”
“And we have both agreed that would've been a bad idea. You were still in the grips of fright, and you weren't thinking straight. I care too much about you to do something that may have left you feeling lost and confused the next day.”
She leaned up and planted a kiss on his cheek. “This morning, for a fleeting moment I thought that maybe you passed that up out of some code of Union Army officer gallantry. But, now, I know it didn't come from some regulation. I know now, that it came from your heart.”
He took a deep breath, unable to find the right words. In the silence that came next, there was only the sound of the rain pounding on the roof and walls of the old inn.
“When I'm done with the Army, well… my farm is probably no more than an hour on horseback from where you live. I know that while I am at Camp Harrison, I'm going to have you on my mind all the time.”
She whispered in return, “And I'll always be thinking of you. But then what?”
He shook his head and held his hands up in resignation. “I don't know. I just have to know that if I come courting you on a regular basis, it's not going to be the way it was during our first two days together. Or, I should say from the time I actually caught up with you and my stolen horse. And when you nearly got us killed by dropping my guns in the river.”
A mischievous smile appeared on her face, and she blushed a deep crimson. “And you didn't seem to have any hesitation about addressing both of those acts.” She began to giggle. “You tanned my hide twice. But both times, you know what surprised me?”
He looked at her and laughed. “Tell me.”