I pull my hand out of his, my mouth dry. ‘I’d like time to think.’
‘Of course,’ Eckhart says. ‘However, I can’t afford you too much time. We both expect an answer by tonight. It would be a shame if you were to be sent home to your old life, where we cannot help you. No other corporation will take you after what you’ve done here. At best, a government agency would scoop you up.’
Or I’ll be arrested. Third strike.
Aaron goes to follow me when I stand, but I stop him with a frown and he sits back down. As I hurry from the office and back outside, Eckhart’s threat rings clear in my head. Suddenly, I get the distinct impression I’m a chess piece Eckhart has been herding to a position he’s wanted me in all along.
CHAPTER 31
The sun is warm on my face outside, and I take a moment to collect myself. My head echoes with Eckhart and Aaron’s offer. A chance to redeem myself. A dangerous chance to redeem myself.
My slate beeps and I see it’s Bobby again. I take the call and his craggy face appears on screen. It takes me a second to process the fact that he’s wearing a hospital gown.
‘What’s wrong?’ All thoughts of Aaron, Eckhart and the Ciliary Gate are wiped from my mind. ‘What happened?’
‘Don’t pull that face,’ Bobby growls. ‘I’m fine. Just a small issue with the ticker. The Box-Doc gave me a ticket for the hospital this time, for an operation. Thought I’d better tell you, in case they screw things up when they operate.’
‘What?’
‘Don’t worry about it,’ Bobby says. ‘I’m gonna be fine. But you know what it means when you’re a non-Citizen. On the off chance something goes wrong, I wanted to let you know. Just in case I kick it. Don’t want them wiping my slate clean, like I never existed. I’ve sent you the registration number they’ve given me here, in case something happens and you need to find out.’
Spots dance before my eyes and I remember to breathe. ‘I’ll get on the first suborbital back.’
‘Negative. I want you to stay there,’ Bobby says. ‘You hear me? Operation’s in an hour, so there’s nothing you can do, anyway. I’ll call you when I’m out and you can visit me when you get a break.’
I want to ask how he thinks I can concentrate when his condition has been diagnosed by an unfeeling robot and will be operated on by an uncaring doctor. I want to confess about everything that’s happening. What I’ve done here. But the words won’t form and I know I can’t burden him. A great weight presses down on my shoulders and causes my knees to weaken.
Bobby looks off-screen, then back at me. ‘I gotta go. But I want you to know I’m proud of you. You were right about Helios, and I was wrong. Getting this education is what’s important. Getting a better life, like you always wanted. So I want you to stay strong for me and I’ll stay strong for you. One lone wolf to another, right?’
‘Right.’ My hands clutch tight around my slate’s smooth handles. ‘I’ll be seeing you soon though.’
‘Love you, kiddo,’ Bobby mutters, then his image winks out. I stare at the screen, now filled with a rotating Helios logo, feeling lost and very alone. I tell myself I’m just going for a walk to clear my head, but I’m not surprised when my feet lead me once again to Blake’s residence.
There’s no answer when I knock, and it unnerves me how much I need to see him. How much I’ve been watching for him, wondering when I’ll see him next. I turn to leave, when the door opens suddenly.
Blake stands there, shirtless. He’s breathing hard and is covered in sweat, his hands bound in wraps. In the light, I can read the tattoo scrolled across his tanned skin. I had a dream, which was not all a dream. It sounds like the beginning of a poem, but I don’t know it.
‘Josie.’ Blake looks past me, as if expecting someone else to be here. His eyes come back to me and I swallow hard.
‘I need to talk to you,’ I manage.
He steps aside and I cross the threshold of his room, savouring the familiar smell of him, even if it is soaked with sweat. Afraid I’ll fall down, I sit on the edge of his bed and don’t realise I’m crying until I taste salt. Blake crosses the room in three long strides and crouches beside me, his warm hands on my knees, his face concerned.
Between sobs, I tell him about my uncle’s operation, then confess everything. What I did for Olivia. What happened to Archer. What Aaron and Eckhart want of me. Finally, exhausted, I fall silent. Blake rubs his scruffy jaw with a thoughtful look, saying nothing at first.
I wrap my arms around myself, as if that can hold me together. ‘Maybe my talent is just a horrible curse. After all, look what I did to Archer,’ I whisper. ‘This is why James wanted to keep me hidden.’
‘That’s not true,’ Blake says sternly. ‘Don’t you ever let anyone else tell you otherwise. Your talent is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.’
My heart lifts before I realise he’s talking about my talent, not me.
There’s a faint scent of cologne about him, reminding me of open water, and I just want to bury my head in his shoulder. But I can’t, because there’s nothing there for me. No real acceptance. What’s between us is nothing more than a fabrication of intimacy. Blake sees the look on my face and stands, walking over to his punching bag. My whole body sags a little, like it had been moving towards him for support and now there’s nothing to prop me up.
‘Did you feel it?’ I find the courage to ask. ‘When the lock was broken?’
He begins unwrapping his hands. ‘I felt nothing.’
‘Oh.’ My voice is small. ‘I thought I heard you reading to me in medical, so I figured maybe you knew what had happened. That maybe you’d felt … something.’
Blake turns back, his face horribly blank. ‘What difference does it make now?’
‘I guess it doesn’t.’ I’m suddenly embarrassed. He’s right, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that I sort this mess out, then fly home to see Bobby.
Blake thrusts a hand through his short dark hair. ‘Josie, listen … what Aaron and Eckhart are asking from you, it doesn’t sound right. Let me check out a few things before you say yes.’
‘They made it sound like it was my last chance with Helios.’
‘I just don’t know.’ His voice is a low growl. ‘I’ve known men like Eckhart before. He only wants what’s best for him, at all costs. And Aaron’s ambitious enough to ignore common sense when it suits him.’
I make a frustrated sound and get to my feet. ‘What choice do I have?’
Blake’s eyes flash with sudden anger. ‘Then do it, if you’ve already made your mind up. What does it matter what I think?’
My hands clench in fists. ‘I can’t believe for a moment I actually—’ I stop before I can embarrass myself. Blake’s eyes narrow.
‘You actually what?’ he asks.
Anger pulses through me, giving me the courage to stride over to him. Surprised, he takes an uncertain step back. I come in close to him, suddenly bone-weary from the desperation that has dogged me since discovering the lock. With it gone now, I realise all I want is to have it back. Because I’ve never felt so lonely as I feel now, even when I’m threading with Aaron.
I reach up to cup his face. Blake flinches, but doesn’t move away. His chest rises and falls, quicker now. I stroke the edge of his cheekbones with my thumbs and stare at his finely shaped lips, the dark stubble peppering his jaw.
‘I miss you,’ I whisper. ‘And I feel so alone now.’
As if the truth has scorched them, I drop my hands and walk away. I hope he’ll call out to me, but hear nothing but a deafening silence, and I know I’ve made a terrible mistake in confessing my true feelings to him. That the lock seeded this longing inside of me, then flowered into something more, something that makes me feel safe and whole. My heart gives a painful thump and a feeling of hopelessness swamps me. Even if Blake had confessed to have similar feelings, we’d been warned to stay apart and I was in no position to disobey Eckhart’s wishes.
I race outside the building. B
reaking the thread was supposed to be a fresh start for me. Was supposed to be what I needed. But instead, I feel I’ve lost something so precious it makes my heart throb with emptiness and sorrow. And if I’m thrown out of Helios, then I will have lost everything. I can’t even imagine how disappointed Bobby would be. The thought makes me ill.
Arriving back in my room, I pull out my slate and message Aaron, typing two words:
I’m in.
CHAPTER 32
My mind made up, I try to relax. But I’m too distracted to study and I keep looking at Aaron’s reply, which instructs me to wait in my room until someone from his team collects me later tonight.
After the sun goes down, I find a few old protein snack bars in my rookie pack and devour them. My stomach cramps from the food at first, but I feel better after drinking some water, and the headache that’s been nagging me recedes. I watch the news and am surprised to see nothing about Archer’s rampage. I wonder if the Galloway name has managed to smooth out the damage from the wrecking ball Olivia swung in her less-than-great revenge plan.
Around ten, there’s a knock at my door. I’ve been watching the news with the sound off and my limbs complain when I get up to open the door. I’m surprised to see Vogel there. She holds two coffees in paper cups—the Helios logo stamped on the lids—and passes me one.
‘Hey honey. Eckhart sent me to get you.’
‘What for?’ I ask cautiously.
Vogel sips her coffee. ‘The Ciliary Gate, sweetheart. I’ve been doing consultant work with Eckhart on this project. Seems you’re the big key to the gate problem, you know?’
As we emerge from the building into the night, I relish both the hot drink and Vogel’s act of kindness. The greens are deserted and we quicken our step as a light rain sprinkles over us.
‘How long have you been working on the project?’ I ask.
‘About eight years.’ Vogel glances around, making sure we’re alone. ‘Eckhart finds threaders and I test them. He was pretty damned excited when you showed up, let me tell you. Any threader we’d used in the past couldn’t get into that blasted thing. But Eckhart seems convinced you’d know how.’ She gives me a rueful glance. ‘I worked with you for weeks, but I couldn’t get a peek of much inside of your mind. You’re all locked up tight, Josie Ryder.’ She pauses, grinning. ‘Except maybe for a few dirty thoughts about a certain dark-haired slider.’
I clear my throat, not anxious to start chatting about Blake. ‘What about Aaron? Have you been working with him as well?’
‘Sure. But the Ciliary Gate is Eckhart’s baby. Aaron got attached five years ago, after the money started to dry up. As I understand, Aaron’s invested quite heavily in the project, probably because he sees it as his big chance to make a name for himself.’
‘And this project is on the level?’ I ask. ‘Eckhart got approval to work on it, even after the damage it caused last time?’
Vogel shrugs. ‘Look, to be honest, I’m not sure the Executive Board knows exactly what he’s doing.’ She yawns, then rubs her temples with a grimace. ‘But you can be sure that they’ll try and take the credit when it starts working.’
‘Are you okay?’ I ask Vogel.
‘Yeah.’ She drops her hand, rolls her neck. ‘Just tired.’
I notice we’re heading towards Central. ‘Where are we going?’
‘One of the D-levels,’ Vogel says. ‘Where they keep all the relics and failed projects.’
‘I’ve been down there before,’ I tell her.
‘Eckhart calls it his church.’ She sighs. ‘Always with the dramatics, that man. He thinks he’s going to change the world.’
After Vogel has punched in the codes inside the lift, she turns to me. ‘Anything I should know about last night?’
‘Not really.’
‘Don’t want to tell me what happened with the primal?’ she asks lightly.
‘No.’
Vogel chuckles. ‘By the sounds of it, he was on the edge as it was. But don’t worry. You’ll be fine with Aaron by your side.’
When the doors slide open we step into a wide corridor ending with a heavy blast door. A touchpad sits beside it and Vogel places her hand over the centre. A screen springs to life, illuminating a blue keypad. Vogel enters a code and the doors grind open, heavy and slow. She steps through, beckoning me to follow her into a cavernous room full of techies suited up in brown nanosuits, bustling about a massive circular structure. An array of structural steel levels brace the room, with elevated work platforms and what looks like viewing booths lining the lower levels.
‘Is that it?’ I’m momentarily stunned that my parents were in charge of something so huge and imposing. Something so … important.
‘That’s it,’ Vogel says as we approach. ‘The one and only Ciliary Gate.’
The structure of the gate is flower-like, with a centre point about eight meters in diameter, with an internal framework built around it. Around the perimeter, a dozen petal-like formations of exposed steel assemblies carry a network of wire, thick optic cables, hydraulic pipework and ancient looking circuitry rigged into neural nets. The overall structure looks about twenty-five metres in height, with the centre accessible by stairs and a retractable bridge. On the ground, metal screens with viewing ports sit in front of the gate, shielding monitoring equipment. Electricity hums up from the floor, vibrating through my legs, as if someone has whacked a giant tuning fork and pitched it into the ground. A figure in a nanosuit, visor up, walks towards us and I recognise Eckhart.
‘I’m glad you’re here, Josie. You’ve made the right choice.’ He gestures to a doorway near the viewing booths. ‘As soon as you’re changed, we’ll get started.’
‘Why the suits?’ I ask Vogel.
‘Just extra precautions,’ she tells me. ‘Everyone’s safety is a priority.’
She leads me to a utility area filled with equipment and cubicles loaded with nanosuits. Vogel hands me one, then begins to strip. I do the same and pull on the suit, though Vogel ends up helping me when my nerves get the better of me. When we’re ready, we find Aaron waiting outside. His face splits into a wide grin when he sees me.
‘How you feeling?’ he asks. Since I don’t think it’s polite to say I’m so frightened I want to vomit all over my spiffy nanosuit, I just shrug. Aaron directs me towards the gate. ‘Don’t look so worried. You’ll be fine. Let’s get into position.’
As we draw closer to the Ciliary Gate, I sense the lowest petal structures humming with power. Hydraulic arms come online to push the petals in a back and forth motion and soon, all the surrounding mechanisms of the gate are moving in harmony. The effect is mesmerizing, with the eight metre high petals appearing to flutter around the centre.
‘Incredible, isn’t it?’ Aaron sounds awed and I don’t blame him, feeling pretty amazed myself.
Eckhart appears, his eyes bright, gloved hands clenching and unclenching by his side. He points to a painted X just under the gate. ‘Shall we start?’
‘Wait,’ I say. My lips are very dry and I run my tongue over them, but it feels like I’m all out of saliva. I wonder if people will be annoyed if I need a time out for some water. Maybe a little lie down.
‘Be calm, Josie,’ Eckhart says. ‘Remember, your strength lies in your instincts.’
With those words of wisdom that do nothing for my nerves, Eckhart joins Wendell behind one of the metal shields. Most of the other techies have retreated to the viewing booths, though a handful stay behind the shields, watching us through the clear ports. My boots hit the painted X, my attention captivated by the whirring gate looming before me.
‘This is a bad idea,’ I tell Aaron. ‘Just officially saying, you know.’
‘Relax.’ Aaron takes my hands and squeezes them. ‘We’ve thought of everything.’ He drops one of my hands to point at a thick line of steel that sits above the gate. ‘Even a massive blast shield that will lower the instant something happens beyond our control, sealing off the gate.’
‘
Maybe you should show me the schematics of the inside, or something.’
Aaron chuckles. ‘Even I had trouble understanding them at first, Josie. You just have to trust me. We’ll head to the entry through the iris.’ He points to the open centre of the gate. ‘Then, beyond that, is the barrier we’ve talked about.’
‘Right,’ I croak, wishing I’d thought to visit the bathroom.
‘I know you can do this.’ Aaron picks up my hand again and holds tight.
‘Glad one of us thinks so,’ I mutter. There’s a crackling in my ear, then I hear Vogel’s voice over the comms link.
‘I’m right here, Josie. The moment you feel like you’re not coping, we’ll shut it down.’
Aaron squeezes my hands. ‘Ready?’
I don’t answer, because I’m really not. My nose itches as my talents shiver out of their puzzle-chest and towards Aaron. The small hairs on my nape rise as our talents thread. Then our talents link and we send ourselves towards the gate and through the iris. Inside, we’re surrounded by a bright datasphere, with streaming code and pulses of electrical energy that shoot past us. As we travel forward, the world suddenly tilts and we materialise in a large white room, our consciousness now projecting images of ourselves, complete with nanosuits. There’s nothing else here, save for a looming chrome wall covered with intricate patterns. On closer examination, I see the arrangements are small anachronistic computer chips surrounded with clockwork: small meshes of pinions, pulleys and springs. The effect is mesmerising, the surface of the barrier almost a maze-like puzzle.
‘Remember,’ Aaron says. ‘Everything we see is created by our minds, based on our own knowledge. I’ve been here before many times, and I found an empty room, with a huge metallic barricade blocking my way.’
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