Keith gestured for her to elaborate.
“They are my alters or, as I call them, my only friends.” Mindy closed her eyes and hugged herself.
Keith experienced a wake-up call. He realized how scary mental illness was for the person living with it. He reached over and nudged Mindy on the shoulder. She stood. Her chest heaved. With timid eyes, she met his gaze. Keith inhaled from the pain, the torture, the loneliness he saw there. Oh, Lord, thank you for opening my eyes. Mindy was visibly suffering, filled with brokenness. Moved with compassion, he enfolded her in his arms and said. “God loves you.”
Her body shook. She pushed against him for him to release her.
But, God spoke through him. “I’m not letting you go.”
“No one wants me,” she sobbed, “not even my own father.”
He gave Mindy a fatherly pat. “God wants you.” Now he understood the impact Michael’s words from his e-mails would have had on her heart.
Finally, they broke apart.
Mindy lifted her eyes to his. Through the Spirit, Keith saw them.
She said, “Dr. Forrester can help us figure this out. Will you come with us?”
Chapter Forty-two
Brown or black?
Verona eyed the text message and the two pictures of the suits he had attached.
Michael.
Imagine the nerve of him! Days and days had passed with no communication, yet he could not even greet her with a proper hello. Verona had been watching television in the living room when the text came in. She had rushed upstairs to her room before she answered.
Black.
Seconds after Verona hit the send button her phone rang. “Took you long enough,” she said.
“I can’t believe you ran off,” Michael shot back.
Not for a minute would she admit how much she had missed him. How glad she was to hear his voice. How her heart thumped against her chest like bongo drums. Instead Verona asked, “How is it at Keith and Gina’s?”
“I’m out of that cell. As far as I’m concerned, I’m in heaven.” Michael addressed the reason he had called. “When are you coming back? I have a court date a month from now. I need you here.”‘
“I’ll be back this week. I came to see my family.” She waited for that revelation to sink in.
“You went home? Who died?” Michael knew she did not have contact with her family, though she had never explained in detail.
“No one died. I came to see my parents. Life is too short to keep holding this grudge.”
She heard a small chuckle. “If it’s anyone who can relate, it’s me. But, I’m paying you a hefty retainer for you to be here on your A game.”
Typical Michael. Everything was about him. “This may come as a shock to you, but my life doesn’t revolve around you. If you must know, I have a son. I came to see my parents and I, um, met him,” she said.
Silence filled the line. Good. It seemed as if she had managed to shock him. Percolate on that awhile, Loudmouth.
Then Michael bellowed, “You have a son and didn’t tell me! How dare you keep that from me? Why would you keep your son hidden? Why isn’t he with you?”
Without knowing it, Verona raised her voice. “Hold on a minute. As far as I’m concerned, it’s the case of the pot and kettle because you have two children, two, who somehow slipped your mind to mention.” She laid the sarcasm on thick.
“That’s because it really wasn’t your business,” he shot back. “You’re my employee. I’m not beholden to you. I don’t have to disclose my personal information to you.”
His haughty tone fired her temper. “I’m not some lowly employee. I’m the woman standing by your side even when you’re the world’s biggest jerk. Which you are most of the time! I’m sick of being your lapdog. You’d better learn to respect me or I’ll quit!”
“Don’t threaten me, woman! And, didn’t you quit already?” he asked.
“I can’t remember right now. Come to think of it, it’s not relevant to this discussion because I’m here. I’m holding your purse strings in my hands. I’ve been busy keeping your hole-filled sinking ship of a business afloat. Whenever I’m not spending time with my son or my parents, I’ve been on that computer and on my cell phone handling things. For you. You’d better recognize!” She yelled at the top of her lungs.
Verona heard a knock at her door. Her mother asked, “Honey, are you okay?”
She cupped a hand over the phone. “Yes, Mom, I’m fine.” Then she went back to her call. “Now see what you’ve done. You’ve got my mother coming and asking if I’m all right because, as usual, you’re being a moron!”
“Goodness, woman! You will respect me!” Michael said. She heard three loud exhalations through the line.
“Stop breathing like a stalker on the phone!”
“I’m trying to cool my temper,” Michael explained. She heard him shout, “Lord, help me!” before he continued in an even tone. “And for your information, I do recognize all you do for me.”
Verona really needed to follow his cue and calm down. Elijah would arrive in an hour and they were going to the mall and the movies. She was looking forward to taking her son shopping. She was not about to let this idiot ruin her mood.
“Thank you,” she said, through gritted teeth.
“No. Thank you,” he emphasized. Verona let him because he should be thanking her.
“I don’t know why we’re arguing,” Michael said. “I didn’t call to fight. I called to check on you. See how the woman I love is doing. But, instead, my voice is hoarse and my blood pressure is sky high. You’re the only woman on the planet who does this to me.”
Wait. Did she hear right? Verona pressed the cell phone tighter to her ear. Did he say what she thought he said? “What did you say?”
She heard some sort of a commotion on his end. “Hang on,” Michael said. From what she could hear, it sounded like Trey was asking him to play ball. She heard Michael agree before he returned to the call.
Verona’s heart was pumping fast and she gripped the phone with one of her sweat-filled palms. “What did you say?” she repeated.
The man had the nerve to play dumb. “Tiger, I have to go. By the way, I’m going to need you to sign off on a major purchase for me. No questions asked.”
Oh, now he was all business. Well, she would die before she asked him again. “I’ll wait for the call.” Verona swiped the end button and trudged down the stairs in a funk. Both her parents stood at the foot of the stairs. Two pairs of concerned eyes watched her descent.
“Are you all right? I think the entire block heard your conversation,” Louisa stated.
“Yes, Mom. I’m all right.” In a daze, Verona confided to her parents. “I think Michael told me he’s in love with me.”
Now they looked confused.
“You think?” her mother asked.
“Well, we were arguing. He said it like he regretted calling . . .” Verona trailed off, knowing her parents must think her plumb crazy. Michael riled her passions. She could not curb her reaction.
“I’m lost. Isn’t that good news?” her father inquired.
Verona nodded. She was still befuddled. “I told Michael about Elijah. Well, I didn’t get to give him the whole story. We were both heated from sharing our”—she formed quotes with her hands—“good news.”
“My word, you two have to come up with a better way to share your good news,” her mother noted.
Verona made a rash decision. “You’re right, Mom.” With sure steps, she zoomed toward the computer in the kitchen. Her parents followed.
“I’m booking a flight for New York. I’ll leave tomorrow sometime. I need to work on the case. I must speak with Michael in person.”
Louisa clutched her chest. “You’re leaving?” Her crestfallen expression tore at Verona’s heart. “I know you have to work but I just got you back.”
“I’m coming back the second week in January,” Verona assured her. “Elijah, I mean, Jah told me he’s singing in church th
at Sunday. I’ll be here.”
“That’s what I want to hear.” Noel gave her a pointed stare. “No more running. You’ve been a prodigal too long.”
Verona put her tongue in her cheek to keep from going off. She did not appreciate her father comparing her to a prodigal. She knew he had meant it in jest, but it hit home.
In less than five minutes, Verona had booked her first-class ticket, snagging the last seat on an afternoon flight. Sulky, she went to the refrigerator to grab a yogurt. She plopped a huge spoonful in her mouth. Her father came and pulled a chair out.
“You can’t run away from the hard stuff. I taught you better.”
“I don’t see myself as a runner,” Verona said. Just then, she noted Louisa’s absence. “Where did Mom go?”
“She’s upstairs getting dressed. She wants to come with you and Elijah to the mall. She didn’t think you’d mind.”
“No, I don’t mind. I like the idea of three generations doing something together.”
They shared a smile, before her father got serious. “You didn’t just leave us. You left the church. You left God. What did He do to you to deserve you dropping Him from your life?”
“I didn’t drop God. How do you know I wasn’t involved with church in New York? You could be misjudging me.”
Noel gave her a knowing glance and called her bluff. “Am I?”
Verona’s shoulders dropped. “No, you didn’t. I blamed God for not stopping you and Mom for taking Elijah from me. All throughout my pregnancy, I prayed. I prayed and I prayed. But, God didn’t hear me. You still plucked that baby from my arms and gave him to the Smith’s to raise.”
“We did, and right or wrong, I have to stand by my decision. I walk this life by faith. What you don’t know is I was praying as well, nonstop. I asked for God’s guidance. I felt He was leading me and I acted based on that belief.”
“I don’t think God would agree with you giving a child up for adoption for no reason,” she said.
“The Smiths are wealthy and they were able to give Elijah a good home. We were broke and our home was in foreclosure. For us, the Smiths were answered prayer. By the way, God does favor adoption. What do you think we are? We are adopted by Him.”
“I make more than enough money now to provide for a child,” Verona declared, jutting her chin.
“Now. Not then. When you ran, I sought God’s face. He directed me to talk with the Smiths. They agreed to an open adoption. Elijah has been a part of our lives ever since.”
“So, you and Mom could’ve helped me raise him,” she stubbornly insisted.
Her father sighed. “It’s in the past. I can’t change that. We have to move forward.”
Verona finished her yogurt. She could not let it go. She drummed her nails on the table as she gathered her thoughts. “Moving forward is easy when you’re not the one who had to carry Elijah inside your womb for months. You didn’t stand by helpless as he was ripped from your hands. You could have helped me instead of punishing me.”
“You have selective memory. I did help you,” Noel persisted. “Even though we could’ve used that money, Louisa and I didn’t touch your college fund. When the time came, we gave you all we had. That money paid your college tuition and shelter. We didn’t regret giving it to you, even though you never kept in touch. There were days we had rice for dinner but we were content because you had a better life.”
His words pierced her core. Her father told the truth. She had had no problem taking the money and leaving without a backward glance. While others were bogged down with student loan repayment, Verona had graduated debt free. She had been too spoiled and too rebellious to accept her parents’ apology and their love.
A Bible verse from 1 Samuel 15 came back to her:
Rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft.
Truer words had never been spoken.
A sob escaped as Verona acknowledged her selfishness. “You’re right. I was too caught up in my own hurt. I felt justified cutting you off. I didn’t recognize that, whether I agreed with you or not, you did what you did because of love. Honestly, I don’t deserve you and Mom.”
Noel leaned forward. “Do you know how much it hurt me to not see my only child graduate from Stanford? Your mother cried for days when I told her we didn’t get an invitation. Then you left without a forwarding address. We didn’t contact the authorities. We knew you weren’t missing. We knew you didn’t want us.”
Her nose ran. Her tears blinded her. Noel went to the counter and ripped a piece of paper towel before coming to wipe her face.
Choked with emotion, Verona lifted shame-filled eyes to her father. “I was angry and I was wrong, Dad. I see that now. If I could go back and—”
Noel held up a hand to still her words. “We can’t go backward. However, I accept your apology and I thank you for it.”
Verona finally saw his wisdom. He had regrets. She had regrets, but there was no do-over. There was only tomorrow.
“I’m not trying to rub it in, but, Verona, I must ask. If you felt we took Elijah from you as a teen, why didn’t you try to do something when you became an adult? We couldn’t have stopped you, then,” Noel said.
“I don’t know,” she stammered, trying to recover from the truth-punch to her gut. She had never tried to contact the Smith’s or even see her son. Verona could not blame her parents for that.
“I’m only pointing that out because I want you to let the past go. Don’t you think Elijah is wondering why, if you loved him, you did nothing to reach out to him? Especially since you’re a big-time attorney.”
“He hasn’t asked,” she said, biting her lip.
“Not all children speak their minds, Tiger. Some keep these thoughts bottled up inside them and then poof! It all blows up in your face. If I were you, I’d talk to him.”
“Has he said anything to you?”
“Not in so many words, but even if Jah had said something, I wouldn’t break confidence. I’m not going to do your job for you. Just as I have to answer to you, you have to answer to Elijah. You’ve got to sit in the hot seat and take the heat. You can’t run from this one.”
Her father had read her left, right, and center and she was torn up inside. Verona had gone through her life stuck at seventeen, failing to realize the tables would turn one day. She now had a child who could resent her if she did not communicate.
She squirmed as the difficulty of the conversation she must have with Elijah hit her with full force. “I’m scared,” she confessed.
“Good. You should be.”
In spite of the tough talk, Verona smiled. “Those were the words Elijah said to me the other day on the phone. ‘You should be.’ I was saying something and that’s how he responded.”
“Well, where do you think he got it from? I have a relationship with him,” her father bragged.
Checkmate.
Chapter Forty-three
For God hath not given me the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. For God hath not given me the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. For God hath not given me the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.
For God hath . . . What if he doesn’t show up?
Mindy popped her gum and looked at her watch. Her stomach was in knots. She knew it was nervousness. She had already been to the bathroom twice.
She eyed the clock. It was ten a.m., the day after New Year’s, and she was sitting outside Dr. Forrester’s office. If her father knew where she was, he would be furious. She had told him she was on a beauty regimen run and Bill had reinstated her Amex card, saying, “I’m glad you’re acting normal. Go get all dolled up. We can go out later since we didn’t do anything for New Year’s Day.”
Mindy wanted to say, “If I have to act, it’s not normal,” but she was not about to argue with him. And, which “normal” girl her age spent New Year’s with her father?
Mindy touched her face running her fingers across the small s
cars above her lip and on her right cheekbone. Bill had suggested plastic surgery but Mindy had recoiled at the idea. All she needed was time and she’d be good as new. On the outside, anyway.
Where was Pastor Keith? He’d made the appointment and had promised to come to the session with her. This day and time had been the earliest Dr. Forrester could squeeze her in to accommodate them.
She tapped her feet. By chance, Mindy looked down. She cupped her mouth. What was she wearing? Those were her stripper shoes! Mousie!
You might take those pills to silence me but I’m a part of you, Mousie said. I’m not going away that easy.
Desperate, Mindy covered her ears. Then two doors opened at the same time. Pastor Keith rushed in and Dr. Forrester opened her door.
“I’m sorry; there was an accident on the road.”
“Hello, Mindy, it’s good to see you. Come in.”
Pastor Keith greeted the doctor and smiled. For the first time, Mindy noticed his dimples and his smile. He was fine.
The three of them made themselves comfortable in Dr. Forrester’s office. Mindy liked the sound of the small waterfall. The hues of blues and pinks on the walls were comforting. She couldn’t resist touching the small bonsai tree.
“Dr. Forrester, do you mind if we begin the session with a short word of prayer?” he asked.
When the doctor nodded, they lowered their heads. Mindy kept her eyes peeled on Pastor Keith.
“Father, we invite you in. Please provide guidance and healing. We pray this prayer in Jesus’ name. Amen.”
He was not kidding when he said short. Did God hear that? She wondered.
“Mindy?” Dr. Forrester held a sheet of paper in her hand. “Please read and sign this statement saying of your own free will, you agree for Pastor Ward to sit in on the session with us. This is not normal protocol.”
Mindy’s heart pumped fast as she glossed over the words. Her father would kill her if he knew. But he was not here. With bold strokes, Mindy scribbled her name.
The Fall of the Prodigal Page 20