by Tera Shanley
Her breath came in needy pants, and she clutched the front of his shirt in desperation not to lose the warmth of the safety he brought. His lips brushed her skin, and she closed her eyes to the world. It was only her and Sean in the glow of the flames.
Desperately, she clawed at the bottom of his shirt and tugged it upward. His chuckle was deep and touched places inside of her she hadn’t known existed until this moment. She breathed for the sound of his contentment and it rumbled deep in his throat as she grazed her teeth against his neck and trailed tiny kisses to his lips.
He took his time, unrushed by the coming deadline or his duties outside of the room. He pulled the oversized sweater from her, and his hungry gaze dipped to her breasts. Gently kneading one, he lowered his lips to the other and lapped at her skin until she arched against him. His fingers pulled her panties until her legs were free of them. She lay in front of him, unclothed and vulnerable, and the most heartbreaking smile crooked his lips as he drank her in. She sat up and ran her palms down the hard planes of his chest and stomach, and then tugged at his jeans until they joined her clothes on the floor. His gaze never left hers.
“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered, and suddenly the cold was banished from the room. Sean was simply too consuming and too warm.
She lay back against the soft mattress, and he followed as if he couldn’t help himself. Nudging her knees apart, he kissed her, sipping at the seam of her lips until she rocked her waist toward his in a silent request. With her hands on his lower back, she could feel the muscles in his hips flex as he slid into her. With a gasp at the intense pleasure, she bowed against him, and he eased back and pressed into her again. His languid pace increased until she shattered around him as he whispered her name with his own release. He cupped her head and kissed her in the tenderest way a man ever had as she pulsed around him. Her skin melted into his like fired iron that never wanted to let go, and their souls threaded together until all that remained was a blinding light where the darkness had been.
Time drifted by as she lay there, connected to him and wishing she could be this close to him always. Under his adoring gaze, she was happy to just be. When he finally pulled out of her, a tiny pain jutted through her chest at the loss of their skin touching, but he softened the ache by pulling her in close to his side, and kissing her forehead.
Sated and shaken from the metamorphosis she’d just undergone, Vanessa lay contentedly on his shoulder as he studied the ceiling with a lingering smile. Tracing the outline of his puckered nipple with a light fingernail, she tried to imagine not going with him.
She’d be a guard here at Dead Run River, and she’d be with her brother, who, despite his newfound independence, needed her. Nelson was all she had left from her old life. It had always been the two of them against the world and imagining abandoning him like that wasn’t something she could live with.
“Sean,” she started, so quiet as not to disturb the peace of the perfect moment.
He sighed. “I know.” The words rumbled against her eardrum and cheek. “You have a life here, and I have no right to ask you to leave it.” Stroking her hair, he said, “I had to try though.”
“Will you ever come back?”
The silence stretched on and on like a great ravine between them. “I don’t know.”
Chapter Eighteen
PEELING HIMSELF AWAY from Dead Run River, from Vanessa, was an impossible task. After the intimacy they’d just shared, all Sean wanted to do was remain in the sanctuary of her arms. A sick, dark wave washed over him every time he thought about pulling the loaded RV out of the front gates. Every mile he put between them would batter his soul like hurricane waves against a rocky shore.
“Daddy, where’s Vanessa?” Adrianna asked as he hoisted her into the door of the camper. She clutched her little pink bunny and looked at him with such beseeching brown eyes, he almost couldn’t stand it.
“She can’t come, baby. She has to stay here with her brother. She has to stay and protect this colony.”
Her little bottom lip poked out, and her eyes filled with heart wrenching tears. “I know how you feel, kiddo. We’ll get along okay though. And you’ll have Laney there—”
“And Eloise,” the waddling redhead called from up the trail. “Don’t leave without us.”
“What are you guys doing here?” he asked in shock.
“I just got my best friend back, so heck no am I hanging around a colony that exiled Laney. Besides, rumor has it you could use my husband’s special skills.”
Guist shook his hand roughly and helped his wife into the escape vehicle. He carried three backpacks and a duffle bag loaded with supplies. Maybe, just maybe, they’d survive this little adventure after all.
Mitchell sat in the passenger seat with a flashlight, pouring over a map, and Laney sat on a bench seat in the back beside a scrambling Adrianna. The whole gang was there. He scanned the woods for the last time. Well, almost all of them.
The metal of the door handle was cold in his grip.
“Wait!”
He jerked his head at the imagining.
“Wait for me,” Vanessa called breathily. Like an angel, she appeared out of the shadows. If angels carried copious amounts of luggage and dragged a pink, four-wheeled suitcase through the woods.
Her fair hair hung in front of her face, and her cheeks were flushed from the exertion of toting the heavy load such a distance, but she was here.
“Vanessa?”
“Yeah I know. It’s a lot of luggage, but it’s not all for me. Look.” She ripped into the suitcase and pulled out a small burlap bag. “Seeds. I snatched them from the storage shed in the gardens. I prepared most of the danged things so I think I’m entitled to some. Dead Run River will have plenty for next spring, even without these.”
He wrapped her up in a hug that lifted her from the ground, and she giggled against his neck.
“I couldn’t imagine you leaving without me. I talked to Nelson, and he said I can go as long as I come back for him when we are all set up.”
He inhaled her feminine sent and buried his face in the space between collar bone and neck. “I promise, if we survive this, we’ll come back for him.”
“Okay then,” she said pulling back to look at him. “I’ve got your back then. Always.”
Kissing her would never get old, but time wasn’t on their side. He made quick but thorough work of it and patted her firm little backside as she climbed into the back with the others.
“Whoa,” Eloise murmured. “You and Sean?”
“Nah,” she said with a wink into the rearview mirror. “I’m just playing with his mind for a little while.”
“You can play with my mind as long as you want,” he muttered as he pulled the RV onto the road that would lead out of the Dead Run River gates.
The next time he looked back, Finn was sitting in Vanessa’s place with a stern look. “Aw crap,” he said as Finn strong-armed Vanessa up to the front.
“What is it?” Mitchell asked, twisting in his seat. “Oh man, Finn looks pissed. Escape tactics,” he muttered, dodging the angry giant headed their way. “Evasive maneuvers!”
“Thanks for the backup,” he sang as Finn plopped Vanessa in between the seats.
“Any time,” Mitchell said from the safety of the bench seat in back.
“Once upon a time, a few days ago, we had certain rules set in place that got us home alive.”
“Not all of us,” Sean argued.
“My point,” Finn growled, “is you mess with each other’s heads and right when we’re headed for a freaking rattlesnake den of Deads.” He sighed. “I’m not trying to be a dick, and Vanessa, stop glaring at me like that because I’m actually happy for you guys. But Sean’s tactical mind is imperative to this mission. It’s why I didn’t want you guys going after each other like rabbits until we got back to Dead Run River.”
“Finn, what do you want us to do? Just never be happy because of missions? There has to be life in between.�
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He pointed at Vanessa with an excited arch to his dark brows. “Exactly. Between missions, but right now, we’re all in big trouble. We’re low on manpower, and half of our team is out of commission or they’re children. The odds of survival aren’t exactly stacked that high in our favor if you haven’t noticed. Vanessa, graduation ceremony or not, you’re a guard, and what have I taught you all throughout your training?”
“Keep my head on straight in the thick of it.”
“Yep. And do you think you can pay attention one hundred percent of the time while you’re making googly eyes at Sean? With your friends’ lives in jeopardy?” He lowered his voice and hissed, “With Adrianna’s life in jeopardy, do you think you can function without thoughts of Sean tripping you up?”
Vanessa stared at the vents with such a troubled look.
“And, Sean, this mission is heavily on your shoulders. Now, I’ve never envied you for having to bear the burden of so much, but no one has been given the natural ability or instinct to get your team to safety like you, so it’s yours alone. We’ll back you up, and do everything we can for our cause, but the big decisions will fall to you. Can you say with certainty you can make the decisions that are best for the team with Vanessa factoring in there? I’m not asking you to hate each other until we’re safe. I’m asking you to cool it so Sean can lead us in taking back this colony. Without his full focus, this mission fails, and we walk as Deads by morning.”
“He’s right,” Vanessa breathed. “Sean, I saw it on the supply run. You shoulder us. If you aren’t focused, we put the others in danger. We put Adrianna in danger.”
Sean pulled the RV to a stop and threw it into park. “Finn, you’re a dick. We’re past the point where we can turn it off and on, and the same argument could be made for all of us. Guist has Eloise to protect, I have Adrianna, Mitchell has Laney and vice versa on all of us. You’re going to have to give us more credit than this. And if I have to hear your pointless lectures all the way to the Denver colony, I’m going to throw you off this bus myself. You’re dangerously close to stepping over the line. Have I ever lost my head while on a mission? No? Your point has been made, now lay off.” He spun in his seat. “I need a minute.”
Pulling Vanessa out the door with him, he strode for the nearest tree that would conceal them and pressed her against it. “Damn it, I can’t do this. I just got you, and I don’t want to go back to keeping my distance. That cock-blocking Bigfoot has a point, but it’s impossible now.” He focused on the pattern of the tree bark behind her shoulder as he tried to imagine going back to the way things were. “I can’t go back to pretending you’re just another teammate.”
“Then don’t. I know you. You’ll make the hard decisions, and you’ll be fair. It’s what makes you a great leader, Sean. We can focus on the mission, and when we get Denver situated, we’ll pick up where we left off. Hey,” she said, placing a gentle hand against the side of his unshaven face and dragging his gaze to hers, “I’ll wait.”
Pressing his forehead against hers he squeezed his eyes tightly shut. “I want you to be the one protecting Adrianna when I can’t. The others can help, but I want her under your care.”
A look of such tenderness washed over her face. “I’ll protect her with my life.”
“I know,” he said against her lips just before he pulled her to him and drank her in one last time.
He was a professional at being professional, and after this stolen moment, he would put all of himself into leading the team. But for right now, she was warmth and serenity and home.
Lacing her fingers with his, she leaned into him once more as he placed his chin on top of her head and glared at the woods beyond. Nothing in him wanted to retreat from her touch. It felt so damned good after so long depriving himself.
“I like you,” she whispered against his chest.
The words filled him with a warmth that started in his torso and spread to his limbs. He knew what she meant—she just wasn’t saying it yet. “I like you, too.”
A quick honk from Finn elicited a delicately placed middle finger from Vanessa, and they trudged back to the waiting RV with a painful distance between them. He’d better get used to it or make a valiant effort to get them settled as soon as humanly possible.
When Vanessa stepped back into the RV, everyone was staring at her.
Sparing a dirty look for the team, she asked, “What?”
“Uh,” Eloise said with a hint of a smile. “Your hair.”
With a quick glance in the rearview mirror, she smoothed the tangles back down. When had Sean even roughed it up? If that wasn’t embarrassing enough, her cheeks were set aflame by the attention of the others. “Well worry not, comrades. No more blatant public displays of affection until we get settled, thanks to Finneas-the-Demon-Cupid over there.”
The RV lurched forward, and she sprawled into Guist’s lap.
“Sorry,” she moaned and rolled off to sit in the space between him and Laney.
“That sucks,” Laney sympathized.
Her saying that actually made Vanessa feel a lot better for some reason. “It’s not so bad. I understand that we both need to focus, and we aren’t going back to ignoring each other completely. I just don’t like outsiders meddling with my love life. This is all so new to me. Finn says I mess with Sean’s head too much and he’s known him a long time. If he’s worried, I guess we should be more careful.”
Laney lowered her voice. “Vanessa, that’s a good thing. I haven’t ever seen Sean act the way he just did with anyone.”
“Not even with you?” The answer mattered more than she’d admit.
“Heck, no. He never acted like that with me. Until we decided we worked better as friends, he acted like he borderline hated me.”
“Huh. That’s good.” She squinted at the back of Sean’s headrest. “I mean, sucks for you, but good for me.”
Soren fussed and flailed her tiny hands out of the baby blanket. With a quick check of the cloth diaper swaddling her little bottom, Laney frowned. “She must be hungry again.”
By the time Laney settled her to her breast, the newborn was in an inconsolable fit and took a while to latch.
“Adrianna,” Vanessa said. “Tomorrow is a big day, and you need to be well rested. Come lie over here, and try to get some sleep, okay? We’ll be there in the morning.”
Sleep would likely elude her, but she could at least get the little girl settled. With Adrianna’s head resting on her lap and a blanket pulled snuggly over her small frame, she rubbed her back until Adrianna drifted off.
Mitchell and Guist played a quiet card game at the small table, and Eloise tried to get comfortable in the twin bed in back among piles of supplies.
Vanessa turned her head and rested it against the cool window glass. It was full dark outside, but the moon lent some of its light to the woods that lined the dirt road they traveled. A lone Dead stood stunned by the road, hunched and limping. He opened his mouth in a silent bellow and started hobbling after the RV, much too late to catch up. The sight of him in the dark would’ve scared her witless before the hunting trip with Finn and the supply run. Now, the monster stirred nothing in her. Just an apathy that said if she were on the ground, and he was a threat, she’d not hesitate to end his miserable life. Who would’ve thought a person could change so much in the course of not even two weeks?
She dragged her gaze to the back of Sean’s headrest again.
Certainly not her.
The RV bounced, and her head flew forward, awakening Vanessa to an early dawn streaming through the windows. Laney and Eloise had been sleeping on the bed, but were looking around with the same confused expression she likely sported, and Mitchell was changing Soren’s tiny diaper on the end of the bench seat. Adrianna still slept soundly in her lap, but Guist had already hopped out of the side door of the RV and Sean and Finn threw their doors open too, letting in twin streams of gray light.
“What’s happening?” Laney asked.
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�Have to refuel,” Mitchell said, pulling his newborn daughter to his shoulder. “Plus there’s a road block that we need to clear before we can get over this little bridge. We’ve been driving on the shoulder for a while, but even that runs out sometimes.” He handed Laney the baby and checked his handgun. “Be back in a minute. Vanessa, up on the roof to do some recon.” He twitched his head upward.
Now usually she wouldn’t take orders from someone, and especially a man who’d wronged her in any way, but this was Mitchell’s way of accepting her new guard position. It was a terribly wrapped gift, but a gift just the same.
Gently, she laid Adrianna’s head on a folded blanket on the seat and stretched her back. With her rifle slung across her shoulder, she shimmied up to the top of the camper and lay on her belly. The wind whipped her hair all around, so she pulled it back into a band and yanked a radio and small pair of binoculars out of one of the cargo pockets of her dark pants. Clicking on the walkie, she tested it. “Can you hear me?”
“Loud and clear,” Sean crackled over the air waves. Oh, that voice settled something turbulent inside of her.
It didn’t take long for her to figure out what the problem was. Mitchell stood in front of the RV, pouring various fluids into it, but behind him, Finn, Guist, and Sean were working on a traffic jam. To the side of the bridge was a deep creek that posed a ninety-eight percent chance of the RV getting irreparably stuck if they tried to ford it. The bridge had to be cleared before they could proceed. Most of the cars seemed to be unlocked and were thrown into neutral and pushed off to the side easily enough. Some of the cars, however, had been locked from the inside and still had the remains of their inhabitants in them. Deads had probably tried to claw at them for days, unable to open the door, and not quite smart enough to use their combined force to break the windows. Vanessa swallowed a lump of bile as Sean leaned over a body still buckled into the driver’s seat. What an awful way to die. But then again, every way was an awful way to die these days. Nobody went painlessly anymore.