The Beauty of You

by Jennifer Wenn

  Charmaine sighed. “I don’t know. But I have to try. If something good comes out of this for Sin, then it’s all worth having to face him and pretend that I don’t hate him.”

  “I couldn’t.”

  Penelope looked so miserable that Charmaine had to put her arms around her and hug her close. As she felt her sister’s shivering body against her own, she knew she had no choice.

  She had to save them all from Lord Nester.

  And if that meant giving in to his every whim, his every request—so be it. As long as she could find a way to make sure Penelope and Sin would never again suffer because of him…

  She would woo him into believing she wanted him, and when an opportunity offered itself, she would throw all caution aside and do the only thing that would end this for forever.

  She would kill her stepfather.

  Chapter Seventeen

  He stood by the fireplace in the lovely salon where the Darlings received their guests at Chester Park, staring in a calculating manner at all the precious little items decorating the room.

  When Charmaine walked into the room alone, he met her with disbelief, as if he hadn’t thought he would be granted his request to see her. But as he watched her move toward him, an ugly, oily smile took over from his uneasiness, and he rushed to meet her, his hands outstretched.

  “Charmaine, my beloved! Seeing you like this is manna for my suffering heart. I have missed you so, and I couldn’t stand the solitude any longer. I had to come, with a vain hope they would let you see me.”

  She forced herself not to shiver with disgust as his sweaty hands grabbed hers, dragging her closer to him so he could embrace her. She felt his lips against her neck, her hair, and her cheek, and she clenched her jaw hard so she wouldn’t give away how repulsive she found him.

  “Come, sit here,” he urged her, reminding her of an eager puppy prancing with excitement. He dragged her to a sofa, where he sat as close to her as he could, his eyes not once leaving her face. “I had almost forgotten how astonishing you are, being separated from you as I have been. The Darlings don’t understand the need I have to be with you, or the depths of my feelings.”

  “They think of you as my father.” Charmaine tried to sound indifferent, and when Lord Nester laughed, highly amused, she knew she had succeeded. Or maybe he was just too excited to be with her again to care about how she sounded or what she said.

  “I know,” he snickered. “But soon they will be aware that I am so much more to you. It will be hard for them to understand, but they will have to live with the fact that you, my beloved, are the queen of my heart.”

  “They will never let me go.”

  He shrugged, indifferent, and lifted her hands to his lips, kissing her fingers gently and suckling on the fingertips with a growl of pleasure. She closed her eyes briefly, nearly overwhelmed by a wave of nausea, but managed to stay still.

  She might have a hard time keeping her real self and her emotions from the Darling family, as their bluntness made it easier for her to be just who she was, but not with her stepfather. She was too used to pretending to be what he wanted her to be, suppressing all her true feelings. She didn’t retreat even slightly when he gave up kissing her hands and instead leaned forward and started to place wet kisses on her neck and shoulder.

  “Ah, you taste so sweet. I want nothing more than to remove all these clothes and finally make you mine. I am annoyed that he took your innocence from me, but I can live with that as long as I have you at my side for the rest of my life.” His lips moved slowly up her chin, leaving a snail’s trail behind, and she felt a cold shiver run down her spine. She closed her eyes, trying to stay calm, but a disgusted groan escaped her as his lips landed on hers.

  “Oh, my beloved,” he cried out as he put his hands against her cheeks, mistaking her revulsion for lust. “I knew you were going to enjoy this as much as I. We are made for each other, a match made in perfect heaven. Has he died yet, that ensnaring husband of yours, so you can come with me as mine forever?”

  She shook her head, and he cursed harshly, releasing her face as he stood and banged his fist hard against the wall.

  “I thought I did the job thoroughly enough. He looked dead when he lay there in the snow, blood all over. What is wrong with those Darlings? They’re like cockroaches—impossible to get rid of!”

  And there was the confession. She shuddered, knowing there was no turning back now. Had it not been her stepfather who had tried to kill Sin, she could have let him live. But not now, when she knew he was the shooter.

  Now he had to die.

  The Darlings had been all over her after deciding she had to be their pawn to get the information they sought. They had all been talking at the same time, their voices turning into a blur as they all had too many thoughts and too many plans about what she should say and what she should do.

  She hadn’t listened to any of them.

  Instead she had put up her walls and made sure to soundproof them, too, so she could find the quiet, peaceful spot inside her where she could think of Sin and his kind, crooked smile that made her feel so good and made her want to hug him close and never let him go.

  What would he say when all was said and done? Would he ever forgive her for what she had put him through? If she hadn’t tripped him that day, he wouldn’t now be lying in his bed, suffering from being shot.

  His life would have been the same as before, and he could have stayed as he was. No wife who turned his life upside down and tore him away from what was important to him. No frustration and anger to wear him out emotionally. He would have stayed the calm and sane person he’d always been before her—before their marriage.

  She thought about the baby growing inside her, and again the lump in her throat grew until she could hardly breathe. She was ready to die for Sin, if dying meant her stepfather died too. But killing Sin’s baby…

  She would try to stay alive. If she was thrown into prison for the murder of Lord Nester, at least Sin could get their child. It was a comforting thought, that Sin had both the Prince Regent and Lord Saxton on his side, backing him, if he needed help to gain custody of the baby, to rescue him or her from wherever Charmaine was held.

  All she had to do was to keep the child alive and well until it was born.

  One to die—one to live.

  “I could try again,” Lord Nester interrupted her thoughts. “And this time I could make sure he really is dead before leaving.”

  Her heart started to beat faster, and she tried to think of something to say, something to stop his evil plans and instead make hers possible. “You can’t reach him. He’s still unconscious, in bed.”

  He looked at her, his eyes unreadable as a malicious smile played across his face. “But you can.”

  No. Good God, no.

  “I can’t,” she whispered, and his eyes narrowed immediately.

  “Why not?” He snorted, disdainful. “Because you still think yourself in love with him? Charmaine, my beloved, you are no more in love with him than I ever have been with your pathetic mother. He’s just someone you had to stand for a while, and convincing yourself you are in love with him has merely served to make the whole thing more bearable for you.

  He kneeled in front of her and grabbed her chin, forcing her to look at him. “You can kill him.”

  She shook her head, knowing she was stupid, because giving in to him would have made it easier for her, but she couldn’t make herself agree to killing Sin. It was too far to go, even for a pretender like her.

  Her stepfather sighed ruefully. “That makes it all harder, but all right, I’ll take care of the killing. Or maybe we could just leave. Head out to the colonies and start over where no one knows who we are and where we come from. If I only had money…”

  She lifted her gaze toward him, sensing an easier way out. Fleeing to the colonies with him? That would be the best solution for all her problems. Her stepfather would be as far away from Sin as she could take him, and Sin would in tim
e be free to continue his life.

  Was it seven years they waited before declaring a missing person dead? It was many years, but at least Sin would still be alive. He would still be on the young side of life and able to find himself a new wife. A young, happy girl who would love him for the person he was, and who wouldn’t bring secrets and death into the relationship.

  She ignored the mental stab of pain and looked up at her stepfather, not hiding her eagerness. “I can get money. Sin showed me where he keeps the money here at Chester Park, the money he uses to pay the laborers.”

  “My beloved!” Lord Nester squealed with joy. “What a grand idea. That would indeed be a perfect solution for our joint future. But is there enough money to keep us comfortable for the rest of our lives? I don’t want to be forced to work. That’s not acceptable for a gentleman such as myself.”

  Again she clenched her jaws so she wouldn’t show how repulsive she found him. Of course he didn’t want to work. All he wanted was to live the good life, eat good food, attend parties and assemblies, and indulge in extended gambling.

  The money wouldn’t last long.

  For her child’s sake she had to make sure there was more, more that was unbeknownst to her stepfather. Sin had given her access to the Darling family jewelry, and she could grab parts of the collection, hoping they someday would forgive her.

  She couldn’t let the child suffer.

  “I think so,” she mumbled, and he lightened up again, clapping his hands together.

  “Oh, dearest Charmaine, this seems like my lucky day indeed. Here I thought I had lost you forever, but instead you have shown me your true feelings for me and made me the happiest man alive.”

  He leaned forward and kissed her lips softly.

  “We have to leave soon. I have had some problems with my gambling lately. The cards haven’t been with me, and I…”

  His strained laughter echoed in the room. “Well, let’s say I need to get as far away from here, and as soon, as possible.”

  Her thoughts raced through her mind. Every part of her screamed against leaving soon, leaving Sin. She wanted to spend more time with him, now that he had awakened. Collect as many memories of him as she could, enough to last for the rest of her life.

  But at the same time, she knew there was no point in prolonging what was bound to happen whether she wanted it or not. She had to leave so Sin could live, so why not turn her back on her old life immediately and spare herself the agony of not wanting to put him and what they had together behind her?

  “Is tonight soon enough?” she asked politely, and winced as Lord Nester excitedly squealed again.

  “Tonight would be excellent. I’ll go home, gather my things, and come back for you later, say, just after dinner? Everybody will be too busy with their port to realize you’re missing for quite some time, hopefully not until breakfast tomorrow. Do you want me to come here, or do you prefer that we meet somewhere more secluded, like the old barn down the road?”

  “The old barn would be fine.”

  “Wonderful, wonderful!”

  Lord Nester shone like the sun in July, his happiness evident in every small movement he made. For him, this was a dream come true. The love of his life would be his at last.

  To her it was a nightmare. A walk straight down to hell. But in the end it would be worth it. It had to be. Sin would be alive, and even though he would hate her forever, it would be a blessing to know he could at least be well enough to tell about it.

  With one last lingering kiss on her hand, Lord Nester left her alone, and she couldn’t hold back a whimper. Good God, how was she ever going to live a life in which he could touch her as much as he wanted? She almost threw up every time he came close to her. He made her feel too dirty to stand.

  But she had to.

  Somehow she would have to find the strength to let him close, let him make love to her. She couldn’t escape it. He had too many times already told her how much he longed to conquer her body. He would probably be all over her as soon as they were alone, without the threat of someone walking in on them.

  The door flew open with a crash, and soon the room was filled with Darling relatives. They were all there, every last one of them currently at Chester Park. The only ones missing were Francesca and her husband, as they were home at Pendragon with their triplets, and Sin, who was confined to his bed.

  “We saw Nester’s carriage leave. What did he say?” the duke asked as soon as he entered the room. “Did he confess he was the shooter?”

  “Yes, Your Grace. He admitted as much.”

  “I will kill him!” Lady Newbury looked ready for war, and her husband pulled her close, embracing her soothingly. Or maybe he was just holding her closer so she wouldn’t charge out through the door on a crusade she couldn’t win. For such a small person, she was quite determined.

  The duke pouted, disappointed. “I must admit I was nursing a silent hope it wasn’t him. It’s hard to grasp how our neighbor, a man who has known Sinclair most of his life, could cold-bloodedly try to kill him. I just can’t understand how the man thinks.”

  “There’s obviously something dreadfully wrong with him,” the duchess agreed. “He has always been a good neighbor and a pleasant acquaintance. Other than his unhealthy appetite for gambling, he has always seemed a harmless and, I have to admit, quite uninteresting man.”

  “You never know what hides beneath the surface,” Charles said, his usually warm, amiable face darkened because of this unexpected grief. “The good Lord does indeed work in mysterious ways.”

  “And behind every bend in the road, the unknown awaits you.” Rake’s wicked grin was quite inappropriate, considering the seriousness of the situation.

  “Not to mention the infamous wolf who insists on hiding in a sheep’s clothing,” Sin’s cousin Drake drawled in his normal, dandyish, bored voice.

  “How unfashionable.”

  “Indeed.” Drake’s grin was just as wicked as Rake’s, and giggles were heard throughout the room, releasing a bit of the tension.

  “You two should be ashamed,” the duchess hissed. “How can you laugh and joke when the rest of us are discussing these horrifying events?”

  The duchess seemed unusually stressed over the situation. Normally she would be the one looking on the light side of everything, preferably with a little twist of drama.

  “Mama, I have to admit I heartily disagree with you,” Rake replied arrogantly, his ever-amused eyebrow raised high. “As long as I can laugh about it, I know there is something I can do about it. Lord Nester might be a dreadful sort of chap, but, rest assured, he’s not untouchable.”

  “How?” Charmaine felt a small hope begin inside her. “H-how can you take care of him?”

  Rake smiled sheepishly. “I don’t know just yet. I haven’t had the time to think this through thoroughly, but I promise you, Charmaine—I will. After all, it’s Lord Nester we speak of. He will be no problem whatsoever for us. Trust me.”

  She smiled brightly to assure him she believed him, but in her heart she knew he was wrong. Because all these years they all had been wrong. They had all thought him harmless, yet he was anything but.

  There was no way around it. She had to take care of this herself.

  As if on cue, everybody started talking at once, discussing different solutions to solve the problem of Lord Nester. It was one outrageous idea after another, and when they started to consider if the old dungeons of Chester Park were secluded enough, she stopped listening to them.

  They had no solution.

  They had no way out.

  This was a bunch of easygoing peers of the realm—how on earth would they ever be able to fight a war against an evil mind who would use every wile and deceptive trick he could think of?

  “Don’t.” Penelope sat down beside her.

  “I beg your pardon?” Charmaine mumbled her old mantra, the one that always took the edge off things, making it possible for her to sneak in behind her walls when she was caught
off guard.

  But this was Penelope, her sister, and she just snorted. “Oh, come on, Charmaine. You can’t fool me. I know you. You are too serene and too calm. You are up to something, and I want to know what.”

  Charmaine laughed lightly, making sure she sounded as amused as possible. “Penny, my dear, dear little sister, I’m not up to anything. Frankly, I’m just so relieved to have all this out in the open and not have to do anything by myself.”

  “You are definitely up to something.”

  “Penny!”

  Charmaine didn’t know what to say. Penelope just stared at her with steel in her lovely violet eyes, something she had never done before. But Rake’s love had given her strength to face any problem, including her evasive older sister.

  “Why didn’t you tell me? I could have helped you against him. I could have joined Mother in her unfailing quest to protect you.”

  Charmaine sighed heavily. “I don’t know. When I was younger, I didn’t mind his possessiveness, because I liked being in the center of every occasion. I was always admired wherever we went, and everyone, including Father, offered me anything I wanted. Back then, he wasn’t in love with me, not as a man. He was just proud of me and enjoyed being the envied and admired father of an exceptional child.”

  “When did it all change?”

  “The year I became sixteen years old. That was the year Mother let me join the social circle of our county and when I had my first admirers. I still remember how angry Father was when he received the first proposal for my hand in marriage. He behaved like a lunatic, throwing things around and screaming that I was his. Mother tried to talk to him, but it only made it worse, and in the end we all—including him—understood what sick feelings he had for me.”

  She took a deep breath to conquer the lump in her throat that made it almost impossible for her to continue talking. But she had to. If she were to leave tonight, she wanted Penelope to have the answers she sought.

  “You still could have told me.” Tears ran down Penelope’s cheeks, and Charmaine’s eyes started to ache in sympathy.