by Vivian Wood
“Rex, this is serious.”
“Yeah, I mean, the press is going to be crawling all over us for a while, but…” He slides a glance over to me. “You realize that this means we’re likely not to be step-anythings, right?”
I open my mouth, then close it again. He’s right, of course.
“So if… I mean, eventually…” I try to get the words together, but Rex beats me to it.
“We could be together,” he says with a nod. “Once the press dies down from all this, the scandal would be minor. Compared with what my father’s done, especially.”
“We could be… public,” I say. I bite my lip. It’s exactly what I wanted to hear him say… five years ago. Now, I’m not so sure. “I think we’re getting a bit ahead of ourselves.”
Especially since there are still quite a few secrets between us, things Rex doesn’t know. And since Rex and I have never dated, not in any adult capacity. This is all so new, and no matter how good it feels, it’s all a huge gamble at this point.
Rex reaches over and squeezes my knee.
“We’ll sort it out later, Kitty. Right now, let’s see what the palace has to say. Let’s be… what’s the phrase? Cautiously optimistic,” he says.
To my surprise, our meeting is with more than just the Queen. My mum is there, and Prince Archie, though they are sitting as far away from one another as possible, avoiding eye contact. Both the Queen and the King are also there, which makes me beyond nervous.
This is what you’d face if you and Rex were a real couple, I think.
Rex ushers me over to a couch opposite his grandparents and crowds me, sitting right next to me. Too close to be appropriate in this situation, surely.
The Queen eyes me, raising a brow as she clears her throat.
“You two have been very quiet this week,” she begins.
“Which we appreciate,” Mum says. She looks a mess, mascara smudged just a little, her skirt suit wrinkled. Her roots are even showing. “Really, Katherine, you’ve been very good.”
“Um, thanks.” I can’t say anything else without blushing.
“The press is like a pack of hounds after a fox,” the King rumbles. “The very last thing we need is to give them anything else to sniff after.”
Oh god, they know. How?
Prince Archie finally jumps in, nasal and snooty as ever.
“Countess Saville and I will each be taking private vacations, which should help put a damper on the press’s excitement,” the Prince drones.
Rex and I are silent, waiting.
“We’d like to thank you for keeping your end of the bargain, staying out of the press,” the Queen says.
“Of course, your highness,” I say.
She hesitates for the briefest moment.
“We also need to know… is there anything else that the press is going to find? About either of you, I mean. We can’t afford any more secrets here in the royal family, not in this unfriendly media climate.”
My stomach drops, and for a moment I think I might be sick. Rex actually pats my knee, giving me a hard look.
“Katherine’s ex-boyfriend has been quite a problem lately,” Rex says.
I want to scream. I want to die. Please, please don’t tell them that Charles is going to expose me…
“In what manner?” the King asks, cocking his head.
“He’s been threatening to make up stories, take them to the press. He’s demanded money, quite a lot of it,” Rex says.
Prince Archie and Mum both shoot to their feet, exclaiming.
“Don’t you worry about that,” the King says, a cruel smile flitting over his face. “And thank you for telling us. We will certainly handle the matter.”
I glance at Mum, whose lips are pressed in a thin line. She’s giving me this accusatory look, like any of this is my fault.
That’s what you get for trying to marry someone you loathe just for status, Mum. Maybe wanting the Westwood men, even though we know they’re bad for us, also runs in our blood.
Rex and I are dismissed shortly after that. I hang around and wait for Mum, who stalks out shortly afterward. She grabs me by the elbow and tows me down the hall, away from the rest of the group.
We huddle near the wall, Mum brushing a lock of hair back from her forehead and sighing.
“Are you all right, Mum?” I ask. We aren’t the hugging kind of people, but I wonder if maybe she needs one just now.
“I’m fine, Katherine. All of this will be handled in short order.”
I bite my lip. “Mum, what are you going to do now? Surely they won’t let you stay here at the palace. Will you reopen Auberge House?”
She gives me a sharp look, then sighs.
“Yes, Archie has agreed to… compensate me, for what’s happened. I plan to reopen the house this week, in fact. I’ll message you the details of when to schedule the movers.”
“The what? Why?” I ask, confused.
“To move your things home?” Mum says, narrowing her gaze on my face. “I’m sure Rex is more than ready to have you out of his hair. It can’t have been easy being in such close quarters with you these last weeks.”
I swear, I try not to blush. I really do, but it happens anyway. And Mum, who never misses a beat and draws gossip out of thin air on the best of days, she sees it.
Fuck.
She turns to me with a new kind of interest, a sly look creeping onto her face.
“Have you made any progress in replacing Charles, my dear?” she asks.
“No ma’am,” I mumble, but it’s a waste of time. She’s already figured almost all of it out, I’m sure of it.
“Right. Well… no rush with moving back, then,” she says, picking a piece of lint off my shoulder, brushing me off. “If you’re comfortable, I mean.”
Jesus, she’s cold-blooded.
“Kit? You ready?” Rex calls.
I turn and glance at him, then back to Mum.
“Dinner this week, I should think,” she tsks. “I feel as though we have so much to catch up on, Katherine.”
“Sure, maybe,” I say, pecking her on the cheek.
I turn and flee down the hall. When Rex holds his hand out to me, a strange sort of reflex on his part, it’s everything I can do to brush him off.
“Not here,” I hiss. “Are you mad?”
I rush down the stairs, and I’m already waiting in the car when he gets there.
“What’s wrong with you?” he asks. His tone is casual, but I can tell I’ve hurt his feelings.
“No matter what’s happening, we can’t just go around… showing affection at the palace,” I say, turning away from him, staring out the window.
“Maybe not yet. But soon,” he says.
I glance at him again. “Rex…”
“Is this the part where you break us up by listing all the reasons we still can’t be together?” he sighs. “Do me a favor, don’t.”
“Honestly, Rex. You think it’s all so easy, but that’s just your life. For the rest of us, there are complications.”
“Like what?” he snaps. “Like the secret Charles is threatening to reveal? Is that what’s bothering you now?”
I suck in a breath. Of course that’s what’s bothering me. This thing with Archie and Mum is so unexpected. I never thought that this secret would be the only thing standing between me and Rex.
I never once thought I might be forced to tell him the truth.
How would I even start?
When I don’t answer, Rex goes silent. He calls his security to let them know we’re coming back to the flat, and when we pull up to the garage they’ve cleared off most of the press.
Unfortunately, we can’t just slip off to our separate spaces and stew on our problems.
“Your highness?” One of the doormen is waiting for us in the garage. “There’s a Charles Ford waiting in the main floor lobby. He’s been quite… insistent that he see you.”
Of course. Of course he’s here, to ratchet up my misery.
“Of course. Will you need some security?”
“Have them ready, but I hope we can resolve this without those kind of measures.”
The doorman nods and we head upstairs. I’ve barely had a chance to put my purse down when Charles strolls into the foyer, a briefcase clutched in one hand.
“Don’t,” Rex says before Charles can say anything.
“Be quick about it. What do you want?”
Charles gives him a dirty look, then glances at me.
“You’re still here,” he says. “Guess you haven’t told him, huh?”
“Shut up,” I snap.
“No, no,” he says with a shark’s smile. “It works out best for me. See, your money’s not good enough anymore. I need something from him.”
“You’re deluded. I’ve already alerted the palace that you’re trying to blackmail Kit. The Queen’s guard is going to be all over you in no time flat. I’d be thinking about hitting the road, if I were you.” Rex stares Charles down with a forbidding expression, crossing his arms.
“Mmm, yeah,” Charles says with a laugh. “Thing is, I’ve brought Dianah into it now. She’s got copies of everything I have on Kit, and instructions to release them to the press if I’m arrested.”
“The royal family will crucify her,” I say, shocked. “Why would she go along with anything you tell her to do?”
Charles grins at me.
“She’s as stupid as you are. Dumb bitch says she loves me, wants to keep the baby,” he says, arching a brow. “Have to say, it’s quite a windfall for me. Her family has more clout than yours, Katherine, and they actually have money to back it up.”
“You’re going to let her have the baby, thinking you’re going to be a supportive husband and father?” I ask, shaking my head. “You’ll cheat on her before the baby’s even born, I bet.”
“Well, I’ve learned my lesson,” he says with a shrug. “I’ll be slipping birth control pills into the next one’s food, I think.”
“STOP!” Rex thunders, glaring at both of us. “That’s enough.” He turns to Charles. “What the fuck do you want? Talk quick, before I put my fist down your fucking throat.”
Charles smirks.
“Katherine is going to keep paying me, like we agreed.” I drop my eyes so Rex’s glare isn’t quite so painful. “And I want a race. I want you to throw a race, Rex, to be specific.”
“You want me to throw a Formula One race?” Rex asks slowly. “Are you mad? A single error at that speed could mean death. Not to mention the fact that I don’t have credentials to race anymore.”
Charles scoffs.
“No, no. That would be unreasonable,” he says with a laugh. “I want you to throw a drag race. Street race, whatever you people call it over here.”
“A race against…?” Rex prompts.
“Tamil Boys. I’ve got it all set up,” Charles says casually.
“You want me to throw a street race with a fucking Asian street gang?” Rex asks, his voice going to a threatening gravel.
“Those are my terms, yes,” Charles says, an icy smile playing on his lips.
“Charles, no. Just leave,” I say, stalking over and pressing the button to call the elevator.
“Mmm, I don’t think so. I think you’re going to keep paying me. And your boyfriend here is going to do the race. Otherwise, I think the press is going to be really interested in my story.” He opens the briefcase and pulls out two photos.
One is a photo of me standing outside a doctor’s office, wiping tears from my face as I stride to my car. It’s very zoomed in, but I can tell that it’s me at Planned Parenthood, where I went back then to maintain my anonymity.
The second is a photo of me and Rex, taken at a party just before our upper forms graduation. We’re looking at each other in a way that makes no secret of our relationship, like we’re about to lock lips any second.
How stupid we were, I think.
“Where did you get this?” Rex asks Charles, plucking the photo of us together from my hand.
“That’s my business, not yours,” Charles says.
“It’s sure as hell my business. I’m not fucking doing anything for you without the negatives of everything and a signed fucking non-disclosure agreement, you can bet your fucking life.”
Charles crosses his arms. The elevator doors glide open, and I want to shove Charles inside and never see his face again. The fact that I ever cared for him, kissed him…
I shiver, feeling ill.
“Then I spill it all to the press, including some rather ravishing photos of you two making eyes at each other in the present day. I think it’s quite a compelling story, don’t you? Young lovers torn apart by a dark secret. Reunited when they’re about to become siblings…”
“Stop talking,” Rex sighs. “I can’t make a decision right now. Get out.”
“You have four days to decide,” Charles says, turning toward the elevators.
“Only if you’re still breathing,” Rex says, and I can tell he’s not kidding in the least.
“That threat means nothing if you’re not willing to kill Dianah and her unborn child,” Charles says.
“Go,” I say, shaking my head. “Don’t dig yourself a deeper grave, Charles.”
“Talk to you soon, I’m sure,” he sighs. Then the doors close on him, and he’s gone.
“Fuck!” Rex groans after a second. “I need a damned drink.”
He kicks his shoes off and heads for the wet bar in the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of Macallan Scotch and two glasses. He heads for the terrace without a word, expecting me to follow him.
Royal blood will out, apparently.
We take the two chairs by the balcony, both seething. I kick my heels off and pull the hem of my dress up with a relieved sigh. Glasses clink as Rex pours us both a measure of Scotch. Me, a single finger, him four times that.
He holds his glass up and I tap mine to his, then we sip.
“Blugh,” I say, wincing.
“Just let it burn,” he says with a sigh.
“The Scotch?” I ask, trying to be funny.
“That, and just… fuck, all of it.”
I take a deep breath.
“I’m really sorry this is happening, Rex.”
He looks at me, his brow creased. “It’s not really your doing, Kitty.”
“It’s my secret,” I say, scrubbing a hand across my forehead. “It’s my burden.”
Rex swirls the amber liquid in his glass, looking contemplative.
“The secret has to do with me, doesn’t it?” he asks.
I look away, silent.
“I can’t work it out, Kitten. I’ve gone through a hundred things in my mind, but none of them get us to where we are right now. What could he possibly have on both of us that’s more than just our relationship?”
I consider how in the hell I’m going to put him off for the thousandth time.
“You know, my reputation and my pride aren’t the only reason I’ve kept the secret,” I say, curling up in my seat and running a fingertip around the rim of the glass.
“No?” Rex asks, but I can see he’s losing patience with me.
“No. It would hurt people.” I take another sip of the liquor, feeling it burn all the way down my throat. “It’s like that aphorism. Let sleeping dogs lie. The secret isn’t something that would be better aired out, something that people would be glad to know. It’s long buried, and I think it’s better that way.”
“And you get to decide that?” he asks.
“If it’s going to hurt someone I lo—” I stop, correct myself. “Care for. If it’s going to hurt someone — hurt you, Rex… Then yes, I get to decide.”
He looks at me. Really, really looks at me. He heard my slip, heard me nearly admit to something that’s
growing between us.
I don’t know if it’s that or sheer frustration at my continued refusals, but he lets the matter drop.
“Can I ask you something?” he says, kicking his feet up on the balcony.
“Yes,” I say, cautious.
He cracks a smile. “Other than the secret, I mean. I’m giving you an out, darling. Changing the topic.”
“Oh.” I smile too. He’s irresistible that way. “Well, sure. Ask away.”
“If you could live any life you want. If you weren’t royal blood, and nothing was expected of you, what would you do?” he asks. “Keep in mind, you’d have to earn your own way through the world.”
I’m a little taken by surprise at his question.
“Anything?” I wonder aloud.
“Absolutely anything,” he says.
“Well… I think I’d do something where I got to travel a lot, and help people. Maybe like… work for the U.N., or help Medecins Sans Frontieres or something.” I think about it for a minute longer. “I’m not sure exactly, but if I could help children, that would be really fulfilling.”
“Interesting choice. Did you know my sister Camille works with an organization that builds schools and water treatment facilities throughout the third world?”
“Camille?” I ask, shocked. “She’s so… um, mild mannered?”
Rex laughs.
“She’s got her own spark, you just have to get to know her better.”
There’s a weird moment that passes where I’m trying to figure out if he means he wants me to get to know his sister better, or if it’s just a hypothetical.
“I guess I should talk to her about that, see if she has any openings in the charity,” I say, unable to puzzle it out. “What about you, what would you do?”
“Well, I’ve already got my charity going, and that’s going well. Actually, they probably don’t even need me anymore. I’m more trouble than help at this point,” he sighs. “I suppose my answer isn’t terribly different than your own. I’d like to travel.”
“Didn’t you get quite a lot of that in the Royal Air Force?” I ask. “You even saw combat, right?”
Rex presses his lips together and nods. I set my glass down and he does too, reaching out and lacing his fingers with mine. It lights me up inside, feeling his touch, knowing he’s craving my touch as bad as I am his.