by Marian Tee
“Good morning.”
Dawn was breaking and my eyes slowly adjusted to being able to see again. Not much, but seeing just a bit was still better than nothing. Last night’s events flooded into my mind, making me jerk up to a sitting position.
“Are you alright?” It was Captor #3 / Rescuer #1. The voice was familiar. So was the smell.
I faced him, words of assurance brimming on my lips, but it turned into a silent cry of horror.
Oh God.
“Woman?” he – it – growled.
“M-morning.” I looked away, pretending to shield my eyes against the sunlight. Unfortunately, with the sun barely visible behind the lavender clouds, it was a totally lame attempt to avoid looking at him. It. The zombie.
Because…that was what it was.
“I know you can see me, woman.” The zombie’s English had a touch of European accent, but his words were surprisingly decipherable.
“J-just a bit.” Which was true, but it was still more than what was good for my empty stomach. I busied myself by studying the surroundings, just so I wouldn’t have to look at him. It was the last days of winter and nature was showing signs of coming back to life. Baby leaves sprouted from the branches of snow-capped trees and birds were chirping faintly from a distance.
I decided to take another look. I could’ve been imagining things, I reasoned out and mustered enough courage to peek…only to glance away after a second.
Nope. Still the same. Think bulging eyes, piranha teeth, and pus-oozing skin. Zombie was definitely the first word anyone would think of. But he wasn’t…he couldn’t be that…right?
“Do not be afraid.”
“Who? Me? Afraid?” I was normally a great liar, but this one was a little out of my league.
“I had thought you were blind. I would have changed if you were not. Woman---”
Yeargh! I scrambled away, but it was too late.
He had touched me. I was infected. I was going to be a zombie.
He reached for me again.
“STOP!” Birds above us furiously flapped away at the trembling force of my shout.
His hand went behind his back in a flash.
My stomach churned. God, but he was fast. “How did you become like…that?”
“You have nothing to be afraid of, woman. I was human like you once, before I was chosen to be a Draugar. It is what I am now, what I will always be.”
I squeezed my eyes shut. I’m not going to panic. We’ve been together the whole night and he hadn’t even taken a nibble. That’s a good sign. I’m going to take it as a good sign because I needed all the good signs I could get.
“So…” I forced myself to look at him. “Are you a zombie?”
“I do not know this word.” A frown creased his forehead, making him even more hideous.
I tried not to blanch. “The, uhh, undead?”
The frown eased. “Ah.”
I almost sighed in relief. Making a zombie frown was never a good idea.
“That is just a myth about us.”
I relaxed even more. “If you’re not a zombie, then maybe you’re sick?” Contagious disease I could handle – well, I could as long as it wasn’t like the one that spread like Rabies in the movie Quarantine. “And that’s why you look…sick?” I couldn’t very well say terribly ugly, could I?
The zombie’s lips cracked into a ghastly smile. “I thank you for your kind words, but I know I look more than sick in this shape.”
“Umm…” This was ridiculous. Now I’m getting embarrassed in front of a zombie?
“You have nothing to fear from me, woman.”
“Well---”
He cut me off. “Enough questions. It will be simpler if I proved it to you. Watch closely, woman.”
“I still can’t see clear---holy freaking cow!” Somehow, he had grown smaller and thinner and instead of a ten-foot zombie hulk, he now resembled a man.
He dragged me forward and I yelped in shock. He brought my hands to his face. “This is my original form.”
Skin just like mine. None of those grisly bumps and holes – yes, holes – that I had vaguely seen and actually felt when he was carrying me. I let my fingers drift towards his lips. Soft and curved where it was supposed to curve, no longer cruelly thin and cavernous. Normal. I drew back to study him as intently as my impaired eyes would let me, making out fair hair, a hard jaw, bare chest, and…
I jumped away, face flaming. “You’re naked!” And if he was naked now---could he have been naked last night as well? But then – he had been a zombie. Naked zombies didn’t matter. His God-awful looks would make his nudity unnoticeable.
“I am.” He didn’t sound the least bit embarrassed that he was conversing with me in his birthday suit.
That wasn’t much of a problem since I felt enough embarrassment for both of us. “You weren’t naked last night!”
“My old clothes would not last in this form. I’m too big.”
“That’s not a valid excuse!”
“I suppose I can look for clothes---if you wish.”
“Oh, I wish.”
A sound escaped him, which awfully resembled a laugh.
My face burned even more. Great. I had just made a zombie – oh wait, a Draugar – laugh, whatever a Draugar really was. Just thinking about what it meant – about what he was – made my head spin.
I could feel his eyes on me and when I looked at him, he said in a sober voice, “It is against my duty to leave you unprotected---”
“Duty?”
“Did we not already talk about this? I have been sent to protect you.”
This just kept getting better and better. What the heck did he mean he had a duty to protect me? “Can we talk about that – and everything else – when you’re---” I waved a hand towards him. “---fully clothed?”
“Or the other way around,” he suggested oh-so-casually.
My jaw dropped. “You just didn’t say…” I was sincerely at a loss. A zombie was coming on to me? I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Great. Just great. The first guy to come on to me, and he had to be a zombie. And yeaaaah, I watched Warm Bodies, too. But no. Just…no, no, no.
“It was a joke, woman.”
I managed a weak smile. “Right. Ha-ha. Very funny.”
He sighed. “I know you do not see me properly, woman, but I am truly not as disgusting as you think I am. I have changed. There is no reason you should still feel ill at ease with me. I cannot protect you properly if you are not comfortable in my presence.”
“No more flirting and I’ll try being comfortable,” I bargained. The thought of a zombie crushing on me, even a nice one like this guy here, was just too weird.
“It will be as you say, woman.”
Guilt nipped my conscience because he sounded cold. “It’s just that I p-prefer to date within my own species,” I stammered. “You’d be better off with a nice female zombie, err, Draugar, don’t you think?”
“I have already given you my word, woman. I understand my place.” He rose to his feet and I hastily looked away because that would have put me on eye level at his zombie…thing.
“Before I leave you, woman, it is important for you to fully understand your situation. You are still not safe even though we are alone in these woods. Goblins---”
“Goblins?” I said faintly, squeezing my eyes shut once again.
WHAT. THE. HECK. WAS. HAPPENING?
“Please tell me I heard you wrong,” I muttered, eyes still closed.
“These goblins are not to be underestimated.”
I squeezed my eyes more tightly shut, counting slowly to ten. This technique got me through everything. When my parents divorced, when they died, when my stepmom was confined, when we lost our house---
Basically, it was the only therapy I could afford for all the shitty things in my life.
…eight, nine, ten.
I opened my eyes.
“Are you all right, woman?”
I gave him a thu
mbs up. “Perfect. You’re a Draugar and goblins are after me. Got it in one.”
“I don’t think I should leave you when you are feeling this way---”
Most people would have been fooled by my tone, but zombies appeared to be more intuitive. I said more firmly, “You don’t have to worry about me.” The thought of my stepmother in the hospital suddenly entered my mind, but I pushed it away. I would get through this and I would make my way back to her.
“You must not let your guard down, woman. These goblins can also appear in human form, such as the old woman---”
“That old lady was a goblin?” I was never, ever going to trust anyone above sixty. Ever.
“Yes.” He exhaled impatiently. “Although goblins do not come out in daylight, they are sure to have human minions and those may still be looking for you. I need you to stay here so I can find you easily if there’s trouble.”
“I’m not even going to move an inch,” I promised.
He straightened. “It truly would not be my choice to leave you. But I am also aware that my appearance is causing you discomfort.”
“Oh, ya think?” He was pacing in front of me, and it meant he was wagging his…thing…in front of me, too.
“Yes.” He nodded with another frown. “I think so. It is foolish but understandable. This is a strange, strange time.”
“Says the strange zombie with the strange accent,” I muttered under my breath.
“What did you say, woman?”
I smiled brightly. “Don’t mind me. Just talking to myself.”
“I will come back as soon as I can,” he grunted out.
He might as well have vanished from the spot. He was that fast.
It was a windy morning and I huddled inside my jacket, shivering with each gust. Restless and trying not to drive myself insane with worry, I took out my pen (nerds like me couldn’t do without one) and twirled it absently between my fingers.
A Draugar. I had read a lot of books in my life, but I had never heard of that term. Was it real? Should I believe Mr. Stinky Captor Turned Rescuer? And goblins? Did the old lady last night really turn into one?
My mind returned to the zombie-slash-Draugar, one who strangely spoke Old English like he was King Arthur. Wait, no. That wasn’t right. He was more Beowulf than King Arthur, his burr more Arnold Schwarzenegger than Sean Connery.
“I am back.” And he was, appearing all of a sudden in front of me like a zombie fairy godfather.
“Jesus!” The pen slipped from my fingers. “Don’t scare me like that.”
“I apologize.” The words came out so easily, which made me feel childish. “I brought you food, woman.”
“Umm, thanks.” I took the handful of berries and a fresh loaf of bread from him. I squinted and saw the zombie attired in dark shirt and trousers. They didn’t seem loose, but I couldn’t tell if they were a perfect or too-snug fit. “I’m not even going to ask where you got all these from.”
He shrugged.
Because I was insane, I felt guiltier for being rude to the zombie who saved me and fed me. I asked awkwardly, “So, what’s your name?” I could do this. We could be interspecies friends. That would be better than a relationship between prey and predator.
“Varthan.”
The berries were sweet, the bread delightful, and I started to feel friendlier towards the zombie. Amazing what a full stomach could do. “You told me someone sent you to protect me,” I prompted.
“The Goddess. She created our kind to protect the greatest treasures of the world from those who wish to use them for foul means.”
I came this far, swallowing everything he told me. And he did morph from giant zombie to normal homo sapien – or as normal as he could be at least. I might as well believe the rest. “So what’s the treasure?”
“You.”
That started my fit of choking. “You’re kidding me, right?”
“Your situation is nothing to joke about, woman.”
“You know what? We’ll get to that in a bit, but first things first. Will you quit calling me woman? You know my name. Dazzle’s not that hard to recall so maybe you could, I don’t know, use it?”
“Daz-zle.”
“You don’t have to say it like it’s bird crap.”
“I do not think your name is bird cap---”
“Crap.”
He ignored that. “---and I also do not mean to cause offense when I call you ‘woman’. It is only because I normally do not address skat by their first name. It is disrespectful.”
“Oh. That’s cool, you respecting me, I mean. Especially since I’m younger than you. But really, Dazzle’s fine. And what does skat mean, anyway?”
“It means ‘treasure’.”
A snort of laughter escaped me.
“Something amuses you, wo---Dazzle?”
“The idea of me being a treasure is just a bit…” I sighed. “Never mind.”
He didn’t press the issue, which was a pleasant surprise. Most guys I knew were nosier than my own sex. If not for Varthan here, I’d still think the strong-but-silent type was as real as Bigfoot.
“We must head to Draugar Isle.”
“What’s that?”
“It is where my kind live.”
“Riiiiiight.” Draugar Isle equaled Zombie Isle equaled an island filled with zombies. And he wanted me to go there? “It’s not that I don’t trust you, Varthan---”
“That is the only place where you can be truly safe.”
“Riiiiiight again. But you see, I’ve got a life and…oh my God!” I moaned, remembering what today was. I jumped to my feet. “We need to get back to the city!” Oh God, oh God. Tony, our manager, was going to kill me. “I’ve got a---whoa!” Varthan had grabbed me by the waist and swung me up so quickly I actually felt airsick for a second.
“What is the danger?” he demanded.
I tapped his shoulder so he’d stop scanning the surroundings like a SWAT on code red. “I’m not in danger, but my job is. If we don’t get back to the city, I’m dead. My entire career is dead.”
He digested that and carefully put me down a few moments later. “Your job?”
“Uhhh…yeah?”
He shook his head. “It is not safe---”
“Dude, I don’t think---”
“What is dude?”
I bit back a sigh. “Never mind. Look, Varthan, you’re not getting it. I’m not asking you for permission. I’m going back, with or without you. And I know you’re powerful enough to stop me but I’m warning you. I’m going to kick a whole lot of fuss---”
“You are making unnecessary trouble, Dazzle.” I could almost picture him scowling.
A scary thought, so I clarified quickly, “Not intentionally.” I took a deep breath. “Look, I know you mean well. But I really need this job.” I needed it like I needed to breathe since it was the only thing that paid my stepmom’s bills.
“So let’s compromise, okay? We go back to the city, I do my job, and then we leave for Zombie Island.”
“Draugar Isle.”
“That’s what I said.” I offered my hand. “Do we have a deal?”
Varthan shook my hand. “I hope you will not regret this decision, woman,” he said darkly. He lifted me up and made me feel like a stuffed koala bear as he arranged my limbs. He was only satisfied when I had my arms around his neck, legs around his waist, and face on his shoulder facing backwards.
It was an embarrassing and awkward position to say the least. Combined with the fact that he had come on to me earlier, it was a position I had to protest. “Varthan---”
“We will travel more quickly and safely this way. If someone attacks from behind, I will be the one hurt and not you.”
Said like that, I changed my mind about complaining. Get killed by goblins and its minions or get carried by a zombie? What a dilemma. “Thanks,” I mumbled and wasn’t able to say more than that because Varthan was literally moving like the wind.
I closed my eyes. By the time we
reached the city, I’d have my eyesight back, be surrounded by my friends, and be just a 911 call away from safety. I should have a plan by then.
Chapter Three