by Cathy Marie Hake, Lynn A. Coleman, Mary Davis, Susan Page Davis
He placed his hands on her shoulders. “I would like to get to know you. May I call again tomorrow evening? After Richard is in bed.”
“Yes,” she whispered, her voice shaky, her body protesting. A driving need to turn to him and bury herself in his embrace threatened any sense of decency and proper behavior she had ever been taught.
He stepped back and removed his hands from her shoulders. As if instantly chilled, she shivered. What was the matter with her?
She turned to the gentle click of her door being shut. He was gone now. The cottage seemed darker. Lonelier. A somber air filled the empty space.
O Lord, what has come over me? Over us? She truly would have to admit Ellis’s eyes spoke of his untold desire. She wondered if her own eyes revealed the same passion.
Chapter 12
All the next day, Ellis found himself as edgy as a land crab in search of shelter and protection. He had almost lost his self-control last night. He prayed long into the night, thanking the Lord for stepping in and pulling them apart at the moment He had. Granted, Bea had possessed the wisdom and strength to break the connection that drew them to each other. Bea had found the resolve to step away from him and their passion. And yes, she had the same desires as he.
What was it about him and his desires which brought a woman to a point of forgetting all propriety? He must be some kind of beast or animal, unable to control his desires.
On the other hand, they needed to talk. A physical attraction between them could not be denied. But could they live so close to one another and not succumb to temptation? Ellis was quite certain he would not stand the test. He hadn’t in the past. What gave him a chance of withstanding it in the present? Especially since his desires for Beatrice far outweighed any desires he ever had for Heather.
Cook was exceptionally cold to him this morning. He didn’t have the strength to tell her he had gone to ask Bea to stay on, only to find out that he couldn’t allow her to take the position due to her social standing.
He felt grateful his parents were no longer alive. They would not be shamed once again by his actions. They had never known exactly what he had done, but they understood from Richard, Ellis had no choice but to leave, for the family’s honor.
“Honor,” Ellis sighed. “Father God, why did You do this to me? Why bring a woman into my path that I can never have? If we should ever marry, she would be a social outcast for marrying the likes of me. It wouldn’t be fair to her, Lord. I couldn’t put her through that.”
“Through what?” Bea asked.
“Bea.” Ellis fought every muscle in his body to stay in place. “Miss Smith, I was unaware of your presence.”
“Apparently, and you do that quite well. How long have you been practicing the cold, standoffish man?”
“Long enough.”
“Ellis, something happened between us last night. Don’t you think we ought to talk about it?”
Ellis turned and faced the window looking over the gardens. “I was forward last evening, Miss Smith. It will never happen again.”
“Oh, so if I came over to you right now and placed my fingers upon your chest, you would not respond?”
“Don’t!”
“Don’t what, Ellis? Admit that I’m attracted to you?” He heard the shuffle of her dress behind him.
“Yes … no. Bea, we can’t.”
“We can’t, or you won’t?” She placed her hand upon his left shoulder.
“I won’t.”
“Why?” she whispered.
“I am not an honorable man.” Ellis walked away from her grasp.
“What?” Confusion knitted the features of her pretty face.
The sun was setting and the pinks and purples of the sunlight set a rose-colored haze across the garden.
“I have a past I’m ashamed of, Bea. I can never return to New York.”
Never return to New York? What kind of crime had he committed? Is that why he left town and never returned so many years before?
“Fine. Be that way. I can’t force you to explain. However, I think you’re afraid. I certainly am. What we saw in each other’s eyes last night was … was … well, I don’t know what it was. But I know one thing, it scared the life out of me.”
Bea retreated from Ellis’s study. It had been a forward move to approach him in the house rather than to wait for him to come to her cottage later. But it seemed safer to speak with him there, while Cook was still in the house and with Richard running around.
She found Richard playing in his room. She now knew she couldn’t stay, even if Ellis offered her the position. Whatever was going on between the two of them was unstoppable if she remained. And Bea wasn’t all that certain she wanted to find out what it was. She had been known to speak her mind occasionally, but she prided herself on her ability to remain in control. Last night she was not in control. And neither was Ellis. If they had kissed at that moment it would have been … Bea shook the thought right out of her mind. She would not allow herself to ponder such things again.
All night she had tossed and turned, hoping that she and Ellis might have a future together. And that, through their union, the three of them would become a family. And Richard would legally become her son. Such foolish thoughts, she chided herself. Ellis had no intentions of giving into his feelings. Instead he erected a stone wall around himself that she was too afraid to climb.
“Richie.”
“Yes, Nanna.”
“I want you to know I love you very much.” She fought for control of her emotions and continued. “I will always love you.”
“I love you too, Nanna.”
She balled her hands into fists and released them, working out her tension. “Like I mentioned the other day, I’m going home, Richie.”
“Home? To my New York house?”
“No, to my parents’ New York house. You remember visiting my parents’ house, don’t you?”
“Yes. But, Nanna, I want you to stay.”
“I’d love to, but I can’t. Your uncle Ellis loves you very much, and he will take good care of you. Perhaps when you are older and a man yourself you could come for a visit and see me in New York.”
“I’ll visit you, Nanna.” Richard grabbed her legs through the loose-fitting Spanish-style skirt she had purchased the other day.
Bea pulled him up in her arms and hugged him hard, groaning and giving him a great big bear hug. “I don’t know exactly when I’ll be leaving. I have to wait for a ship. Hopefully, I’ll have a few days to spend with you before I go.”
“Can we go fishing?”
She grasped him more firmly. His bright blue-gray eyes darted back and forth imploring her to say yes. How could she not? “Sure, how about tomorrow morning?”
“Yippee.”
Bea smiled. A child could shift his or her emotions as easily as the wind. One minute, sad about her leaving. The next, excited to go fishing. She set him back down on the floor. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning. Good night, Richie.”
“ ’Night, Nanna.” Richie continued to play with his blocks on the floor, his face intense as he worked on his next masterpiece.
Bea slipped into the hallway and tentatively approached the staircase. This was now the second time she broached the subject of her leaving to Richard, and it was getting easier, for him and for her. Perhaps she would be able to get over the tremendous loss in time.
At the foot of the stairs the darkened silhouette of Ellis Southard stood, waiting, his stance rigid, even more than before, if that were possible. Bea took in a deep breath and descended the stairs. “Good evening, Mr. Southard.”
How could she be so casual? Ellis reached out to her and pulled her toward him. Fear blazed in her eyes. He paused, then released her. “Good night, Miss Smith.”
The stunned woman stood in front of him. He stepped back. Timidly she reached her hand toward his forearm, but before it connected she pulled it back.
“I’m taking Richard fishing in the morning. Then I’ll begin searching for a ship
to make my departure. I think it would be best.”
Ellis didn’t want her to leave, but he didn’t trust himself around her. The temptation he had felt with Heather was nothing compared to the pull of this woman. Unable to speak, he simply nodded his assent.
She turned and walked out the front door. She would be out of his life soon. The temptation would be gone. He could get back to living his quiet life. Ellis eased out a pent-up breath.
“Uncle Ellis,” Richard hollered from up the stairs. Perhaps his life wouldn’t be all that quiet. He mounted the stairs two at a time and hurried to the child.
Bea set out for town after cleaning up from her morning fishing expedition with Richard. Unlike the time before, Ellis had not joined them. There must be a ship going to New York. She fortified her resolve to go back home.
Most ships passed through the Key West seaport as they worked their way from the states to the Caribbean or vice versa. Disappointed to find all the ships sailing in the wrong direction, Bea headed toward a small shop she had passed earlier. Purchasing some gifts for her family might help her to focus on New York rather than on what she was leaving behind. A few more days on Key West would give her a few more days with Richard. Granted, the tension between Ellis and herself would probably mount, but …
Bea’s heart caught in her chest. She saw Ellis working on his dock. He appeared to be washing the sponges. His well-groomed beard glistened in the sunlight. Its red highlights made him even more striking. Bea fought the urge to walk up to him. Again last night he had almost kissed her. Frightened by such raw emotion, she had pulled away from him. Yet, she couldn’t stop thinking about what it would be like to kiss—and be kissed—by such a powerful man.
She walked into the small shop featuring handmade crafts from the area residents. There were figurines made from shells, carved coconut husks and a variety of other strange items.
“May I help you?” a medium-height, fortyish woman asked.
“I’m just browsing, thank you.” Bea glanced at the shell figurines.
“Take all the time you’d like. My name is Peg; I own this little shop.”
“Did you make these?” Bea pointed to the shell critters.
“Actually, those are made by someone else. My hobbies are over there.” She motioned to the side wall where various cloth items lined the shelves.
Bea worked her way over. There were linen tablecloths with finely embroidered flowers on the corners, some matching napkins, napkin ring holders, and a variety of rag dolls. “These are wonderful.”
“Thank you. I opened the shop during the war. I found the soldiers loved to purchase items to send home to their mothers, wives, and sisters. The island has a certain uniqueness, being so far south. And people seem to like to buy trinkets for loved ones when they travel.”
Bea chuckled. “That’s why I’m browsing.”
“Where are you from, and how long are you here?” Peg sat down behind the counter and brushed back her long blond bangs.
“Came from New York. I’ll be returning home as soon as I procure passage.”
“New York, as in the city?”
“Oh no, I’m from way upstate, near the Canadian boarder. I brought Richard to his uncle Ellis.”
“The nanny. I should have realized. Heard you had a bout with heatstroke.”
Did everyone know her business? “Yes. Didn’t know if I was going to make it at one point. The doctor said it was because I’m used to the very cold temperatures up North, in contrast to the heat here.”
“Happens to a lot of folks—no shame in it. Has Mr. Southard found a new nanny for the child?”
“I don’t believe he has, but Richard is a good boy. It shouldn’t be difficult.”
Peg laughed. “This is Ellis Southard we’re talking about, right?”
Bea knitted her eyebrows. “Yes.”
“You should have seen his list. The woman had to be a saint and fifty years old at least, according to what he put together. Of course, most of the young gals here were hoping to get the job in order to hook the man. He’s just not interested in marriage. And it ain’t from a lack of some gals trying, let me tell you.”
Bea blushed.
“Sorry, I shouldn’t be so forward. Comes from living here so long. People just learn to let their mouths flap a bit. Never did gossip much at home, but here … well, it’s the favorite pastime.”
“I understand.”
“So, I take it Mr. Southard isn’t interested in keeping you on as the child’s nanny.”
“I have responsibilities back home. My family is planning another coming-out party.”
“Coming-out party! You best set yourself down, dear. We’ve got plenty to discuss.” Peg beamed and pointed to a stool.
Ellis worked his shoulders back, easing out the tension. He watched Beatrice make her way around to the various docks and ships. He supposed he could have told her there were none immediately heading to New York, but he wondered if she would have believed him.
She looked wonderful this morning in her Spanish skirt and blouse. The style of clothing fit her and her more aggressive personality. He wondered what some of the high society ladies back home would think if they saw her dressed in such a casual style. “Probably collapse,” Ellis chuckled.
She had slipped into Peg Martin’s gift shop and seemed to be spending quite a bit of time inside. Peg was a great gal, but she could rattle on so. He wondered if he should go over to the store and rescue Bea from Peg’s assault of questions.
“ ’Morning, Ellis.” Marc Dabny headed toward him.
“ ’Morning.”
“Heard the lady was leaving the island soon.”
“Appears so.”
“I asked her if she would like to go to dinner with me one night, but she let me know she would be leaving and was in no position to begin a relationship.”
“Sounds wise.” She’d given Ellis just the opposite impression. He reminded himself he wasn’t interested in pursuing a relationship. She was leaving.
“She’s quite a looker.” Marc whistled.
“I guess. So tell me, what brings you over this morning, Marc?” He must have spent too much time in the sun; his head was pink from an obvious sunburn, Ellis observed. Why a man with so little hair on his head didn’t wear a hat baffled him.
“Oh, right. I was wondering if you had room for a partner.”
“Partner?”
“Yeah, I’ve got some money set aside and I think your business is going to be growing. I also have a couple ideas about expanding your market.”
“Haven’t given any thought to expanding.” In fact, he was beginning to think about closing down the business and returning home to New York to raise Richard on the family farm. “Maybe we should talk, Marc.”
Marc rubbed his hands together. “Great. With my investment we could hire a few more men, buy a few more boats, and begin shipping the sponges into other cities besides New York.”
“I’m listening.” And Ellis seriously was. If Marc bought into the business, maybe Ellis could return home and still maintain his business here in Key West.
“As you know, the railroad is expanding across the western frontier. And I was thinking, if we took the sponges to the cities where people connect with the trains, we would see the sponges move out West as well.”
“Interesting. Do you have contacts in some of these cities?”
“Some. Men I served with in the war. But I could make a trip north, make some contacts, and line up initial sales.”
Marc was a go-getter, and he seemed to have an eye for business. “Marc, I would need to see your books and how well you manage your assets before I agree.”
“And I would like a look at yours as well.”
“That’s fair. All right, why don’t you come over this evening and we’ll discuss business in a more formal manner. I’d want a lawyer to draw up any agreement.”
“Naturally.”
“I must tell you, I might be interested in
having someone else run the business so I can return to New York for awhile and take care of the farm.”
“Either way, you stay and run it or I stay, doesn’t much matter. I’ll be over after dinner tonight.”
“I’ll have my books ready,” Ellis said and took a step back toward his work.
Marc waved his salutation and left.
Should he move back to New York? Should he raise Richard there? Or should he just stay put and enjoy his life here? So many questions. So many changes in such a short span of time. Ellis sat on the edge of the dock and prayed. “Father, I’m confused. I see advantages to Marc coming on as a partner, but I want to be wise. I want to honor Richard’s request to raise his son, and I know he wanted the boy to enjoy growing up on the farm. But can I really return home? And what about this attraction to Beatrice Smith? If I return to New York won’t she be there also?” Ellis groaned.
He sprang up, peeled off his shirt, shoes, and socks, and jumped into the ocean. A long hard swim was in order. He needed some physical exercise. He needed to relax.
“Goodness, you did all that for a friend?” Peg asked.
“Yes, and I’d do it again.” Bea sipped a cup of tea Peg had given her.
“That kind of friendship is hard to find. I’m pleased to know you, Bea.”
Bea dabbed her mouth with the cloth napkin. “Thanks, I’m sure many folks would do what I did.”
“I wouldn’t be so sure.
“We have a dinner at the Presbyterian church tonight. Would you like to come?”
“Goodness, what time?”
“Six.”
Ellis usually returned home at five. “Sure, I’d love to. Thanks.”
“Tell you what, I’ll have my brother, Danny, come by your place and escort you to the church.”
“If you tell me where it is, I think I can manage it.” Bea shifted on the stool. Peg waved her hand with a quick flick of the wrist. “Nonsense, a woman should have an escort. You know that.”
“But I thought such things weren’t followed down here.”
“True enough, but once the sun goes down and the sailors start to drinking, it’s just wise to have a man escort you.” Peg tapped her hand onto Bea’s.